Faline Flossie

BUT IS IT GIVING MIDNIGHT SUN THO??? (THIS IS MY NEW ACC I LOST MY PASSWORD :<)

Often, there is so much pain hidden in the little ways we fold into ourselves. Growing is a stab to the heart from a thief in the night; nothing about it ever happens the way we expect. And oftentimes, we try to grab the pieces before they fall - holding onto them for just a little longer. It's silly then to wonder why are hearts don't break at the same time as everyone else's. The simple answer is in these words. Nothing is more heartbreaking then realizing the body and world you inhibit is not one you would have chosen if ever you had the choice. Whichever the way the pieces of your being were formed there's still ways to break it. Therein lies the grief of awareness that you can never escape from and that is the first piece to break. 'Which pill would you take?' there's no answer to that when all the pills are poisoned. Rather, the question should be - what world would you have built so that you'd never have to make that choice? I watch my being break and bend the way you would to a loved one who walks out into the street. I witness my own powerful demise, a loving death that leads to a rebirth into something not even quite real. My gen - er...gend arr...gender? A funny word for something that doesn't mean anything at all but also dictates the way people will treat you for the rest of your time here. My being and the silly flesh attached to it. Something I'm meant to take all too seriously but have no spiritual desire for. Hot poker irons resting in my chest as I struggle with the very concept that turned me needy and sad. What's the use of me the way that I am? Do I even serve myself spiritually or sexually existing in this form? Or am I mere animal bordering on the edge of a forest outside of a home I'm meant to be in? When I touch myself, is it me that's felt or the feeling of an unwanted stranger? Perhaps then it is anti-feminist of me and anti-everything of me to want something more than what I have been allowed to want. What if I want more power, more beauty, more authority to inhibit a role long forgotten and unmade? Maybe there's something beautiful in what I want, a sort of soft and unspoken ancestral love that rises with me. A love that stands by my side as I face a world locked in it's decrepit rules and deceit. But then, I think - what is there to enjoy that truly exists outside this society? Or is the gendered grooming too deep to untangle?

Is there anything left to enjoy just because...I do?

I decide to watch these pieces of me fall, hoping that once they are shattered - all broken in the ways they were always meant to be; that the answer to what I should become would form as I piece back together what is meant to stay. I am a deep expedition explorer, hacking away at the thorny lies that have told me to 'just be happy with the little that I'll get in my lifetime.' That I should 'accept the body I came in because it's already beautiful and desirable.' Tearing down the brambles that hold my feet in place, ignoring the sweet lull of their fruit dragging me back to conformity. If I want to be free - it will not be easy and this trek is long.

A whole lifetime and then some must be dedicated to this terrifying yet noble pursuit. But as I trek, I meet other explorers who have taken different yet not dissimilar paths to me who hack away alongside me. Together, our journey is long and arduous but not entirely impossible the way it felt at the start. Along the way, we lose some to unfathomable traumas and menacing traps. Others group up and find a nice perch to watch the world on. But our numbers do not dwindle, the further along we get the more that join us. And if we all saw the world this way, that every step of progress is a step made for everyone - maybe when we notice our pieces breaking off and falling to the ground we won't fear how it shatters, but find joy in knowing that someone who's been there before will be there now to show you how to put yourself back the way you were always born to be. Sex is just sex. Gender is just gender. Love is always just love. Sincerely, Faline Flossie

TWO MONTHS OF CONSISTENCY, SHOULDERS BROADENING MF!!! 🏋🏻

For my sparkly trans wife...

giving my fiancée morale support for her soccer game ;)

Why can't we all just get along? my fiancee said something to me the other day

'Money is literally made up and somehow billionaire [facist pedos] are using it to control us?'

It gets worse when you realize we're being controlled by paper propoganda pamphlets falling from the sky (I.E. meta, fb, ig, influencers, ai controvery chat bots???) whenever I reflect on how stupid all of this shit is, it makes me want to quit my subscription to society.

On one hand, I want to help - on the other, I can't even get out of bed half these days; as I'm sure all of us feel. Our lives are not only affected on a socio-economic, interpersonal and financial level but even in friendships/community.

People are becoming more selfish and it's all by design.

It sucks that all the tinfoil hat conspiracists were right from the start and it makes me cynical; does it matter to have hope in people anymore? If the most scornfull worldviews have come true, even the ones with the least hope or positive philiosophical view on human nature's true nature...then what's left?

I guess we just have to keep buying, keep consuming - no matter the cost to the enviornment or the impact it has on the war and soon we'll find we have almost no choice on making enviormentally/ethically correct decisions anymore because the billionaries bought literally everything! How fun.

We're in a pressure cooker, and we're running out of time - if we want to take back a life of POC filled scholastic book covers at fairs and "frutigier aero" it can't exist without innovation, resistance, acceptance/active allyship (of WOMEN and the LBGTQIA+ community).

Aesthetics and gender/sexual expression (much like being PUNK) should be backed by the beliefs/lifestyle of a person otherwise we might as well all be AI chatbots.

And that's where you, my friend, can start today in a small act of resistance, make your expression political if it isn't already; because many (POC/LGBTQIA+ community) don't have a choice in the first place.

"My sexy aesthetic is highly synthetic Fuck my geneticsI wanna be a bimbo doll Let's have another shopping haul [...] My boobs are huge but I am small B-I-M-B-O I just wanna be a stupid hoe"

Okay - TOTALLY obessed with this song, I love the sardonic and sarcastic vibe it gives off. This is actually how it feels to be an autistic girlie conforming to gender norms. It's just a performance babes!

We're LEAVING - all the hot and sexy girls, gays, theys, and neurodivergent folks THIS IS YOUR SIGN. Build a website, use a template, or buy a website off REAL CREATORS!

sprinkle banana mmmm nostalgic for bleedy gums but at least I feel whimsical <3 throwing it back to some REAL tumblr aesthetics

Just finished my second coaching session with someone WOKE asf like me bro, you don't know how hard it is to find someone normal these days I spent YEARS with overcontrolling therapists that breached their doctor patient confidentiality with me to appease family members/bring their WHITE/WESTERN POV to the table and now first session this coach said to me 'I'm not here to take sides, I don't care what happens in your relationship - I'm here to help you." The fact that that sentence alone is revolutionary is why this world is so broken. The world has never been cookie cutter black and white no matter how much my autism brain tried to convince me otherwise. Polarizing thinking damages the psyche, it isolates your inner child and keeps you trapped in shame. Understanding LEADS to healing people, I always say that.