The State of The Art... Sort of.

Ok I know this is an odd crackship but I need the M*A*S*H and Columbo enjoyers to consider this as an option. So on my Tomodachi Life island, Columbo and Klinger fell in love (and later got married). But could we just consider the possibility of an au where Klinger is Mrs. Columbo? Like imagine they met during the war and they developed a close connection. Throughout the entire series, Columbo gushes about his wife, although we never see her. We almost get glimpses, we see people talk to her, but never see her face. And with Klinger’s gender expression, I could see him taking that moniker for 1. Columbo’s safety and 2. It felt natural after so long.

“What, to the American slave, is your 4th of July? I answer; one day that reveals to him, more than all other days in the year, the gross injustice and cruelty to which he is the constant victim. To him, your celebration is a sham; your boasted liberty, an unholy license; your national greatness, swelling vanity; your sound of rejoicing are empty and heartless; your denunciation of tyrants brass fronted impudence; your shout of liberty and equality, hallow mockery; your prayers and hyms [sic], your sermons and thanks-givings, with all your religious parade and solemnity, are to him, mere bombast, fraud, deception, impiety, and hypocrisy – a thin veil to cover up crimes which would disgrace a nation of savages. There is not a nation on the earth guilty of practices more shocking and bloody than are the people of the United States, at this very hour.”