Not the slowest crayon in the box.
Artist in hiding.
27 years old 🧑🦳
@retronatic is my sideblog, so feel invited! :)
English is not my first language,
so please message me
if I write anything weird or harmful
(for clarification on what I meant)
I don't want to be misunderstood
by an accident of that nature. (T▽T)
This blog was dedicated mostly
to my less classic/serious art,
doodles, fanart, shitposting,
things important to me,
and to pure enjoyment
+ fun of it all.
Now it's a whatever amalgam.
*
* I do take commissions! ヽ(o・∀・)ノ
★
"It’s lovely to think John would have been 80. And, you know, that’s...that’s... it’s nice to imagine him at 80. I think he would...I think he would be, very literate. I think he would be writing, uh, not necessarily just music cause he was starting to get into, uh, he did, he did a couple of little books. Um, and I think, I think he would have matured nicely." (2020)
"[I use] pencil and paper. I’m not a typist. Funnily enough, John became a red-hot typist towards the end of his life. He had always had this “Arts Correspondent in Kowloon” kind of dream. But for me it’s pencil and paper." (2001)
"He might have become a novelist. That's something he wanted to do." (1989)
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i just can't convey the frustration and sorrow that it's been to grow up at first without the internet and then watching it bloom into this useful, fun, connecting force you sometimes spent time on, only for it to degrade into this constant oppressive waste of time and energy where people are constantly pumping out algorithmically designed content for max algorithmic appeal and even the most simple search generates either no results or an infinite abyss of ai generated slop none of which is usable or correct. we briefly had a library of alexandria and then fed it into a paper shredder so advertisers could sell a random mash of pulp back to us at a premium.
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Sometimes I really want to take everyone under the age of 24 (as of 2026) by the shoulders and say:
"I'm really sorry that lockdown and the ongoing pandemic interrupted pivotal educational and social/emotional development moments for you. You have an uphill battle towards adjusting to a lot of community based efforts because you experienced a mass trauma during an incredibly important time in your life where you should have physically been around your peers learning to engage in shared community. There is no "but" here, I'm genuinely really sorry. Something many of us consider key points in our interpersonal growth as youths was taken from you, not without reason but without care for its impact on you. I hope you know we are eternally allies in our struggles and if that is something you struggle to know I hope you can learn it someday."
Because so many of the angriest, most disenfranchised people I see on this website are under 24 and I often try to put younger people's behavior in the context of where they might have been 2020. I've seen the impact on my siblings and their peers+friends first hand, all ages 18-24. We've talked about how its impacted them, the isolation, the attachment to the internet, the anxieties and phobias and fears it developed in them due to the pandemic, the political unrest, and the responses to both that we've seen since. I know they're not the only ones and I know how much being marginalized also influences that impact too.
It's terrifying. I know it must be terrifying for a lot of the young people on Tumblr too. I hope one day we're able to bridge all of those complex feelings into something collective and positive so we can do our best to prevent similar traumas from happening to future generations.
I was 15 when the pandemic started and can confirm it sucked, and I picked up a lot of the side effects you mentioned.
My father also decided to take my wifi away from my phone early in the pandemic because he didn't like me be on social media or in my room for the long periods of time I was in my room for (because spoiler alert he sucks as a parent and person and I didn't like being around him).
So that didn't help anything. I didn't even have any warning to ask most of my friends for their phone numbers or if they had discord accounts (I was texting them on Instagram at the time). I didn't get wifi back on my phone until I moved out at 19. I still am annoyed about that whole thing.
And although I still suck at socializing, I'm trying to get better now. I wish I was further along in the steps of adulthood because I feel so behind, like a 30 year old who did fuck all for their entire 20s.
This is a comment I got on a post about my students getting flagged for false AI detection.
This comment caught me off guard for a few reasons. And while it's probably just rage bait, it's a useful jumping-off point for some thoughts I've had regardless.
First, I find the assumption that I would performatively do anything on this site kind of funny.
This is Tumblr.
The numbers here have less value than the arcade tickets you trade in for a plastic slide whistle. We are screaming into a kaleidoscope of fandoms, inside jokes, and posts about Victorian sewer systems. The idea that I would carefully construct a public performance here feels absurd.
But the bigger point is the claim that there's no meaningful difference between using AI to help write a paper and using the internet or a computer in general.
Because there is a difference.
If I had to put it poetically, it's the difference between writing your thoughts in a notebook and releasing a parrot into a crowded dinner party, letting it listen to six hundred conversations at once, and then treating the resulting word salad as though it possesses intention.
The internet is a library.
A tool.
A search engine helps you locate information.
None of those things are attempting to generate the answer for you.
You still have to read.
You still have to evaluate.
You still have to decide whether a source is trustworthy, whether an argument makes sense, whether a claim can be substantiated.
You still have to do the thinking.
A large language model does something fundamentally different.
It takes an input and generates an output based on patterns found in its training data. It does not know whether the answer is true. It does not understand the argument it is making. It cannot distinguish between a correct statement and an incorrect one in the way a reasoning mind can.
What it does is predict what a convincing answer would probably look like.
Fact checking matters.
Source verification matters.
Understanding where information comes from matters.
Knowing how an argument was constructed matters.
Because if your process for writing becomes "generate paragraph, accept paragraph," then you've skipped the very thing writing is supposed to cultivate.
And that's the part that concerns me.
Not because I hate the concept of machine learning.
I don't.
What people commonly call AI is, at its core, a method of processing and generating information through pattern recognition. As a concept, it's morally neutral. It's also not particularly new.
The problem is that a lot of the public conversation around it treats these systems as though they are intelligent in the way people are intelligent, and many companies are more than happy to encourage that perception through the way they're marketed and sold.
But the systems currently available are not reasoning minds. They do not understand what they're saying. They do not possess intent, beliefs, or comprehension. They do not think through problems the way humans do. They generate outputs based on patterns found in data.
My issue isn't with the existence of the technology.
My issue is with the way large language models are currently marketed, presented, and trained.
They're sold as tools that can help you write, help you think, help you learn.
But those are three very different things.
Helping someone write should mean supporting the writing process.
Helping someone think should mean encouraging critical engagement.
Helping someone learn should mean deepening understanding.
What these systems often do instead is produce something that resembles those outcomes from the outside.
Without necessarily requiring the process that creates them.
Writing is not merely the act of producing words.
Writing is thinking made visible.
"AI", and by that I mean large language models using machine learning, are not performing independent thought. They are not reasoning in the way people do. They are taking the data they have been trained on, remixing patterns from that dataset, and generating a response that statistically resembles the kinds of answers that would fit the input.
THAT is the difference.
Writing the process of wrestling with an idea long enough to discover what you actually believe about it.
If you outsource that process entirely, you end up with text, but you've skipped the part where the writing was supposed to happen.
There's also the question of the source of the training data.
These systems are built on a staggering amount of stolen human work.
Entire lifetimes of creative and intellectual labor compressed into datasets, gathered without consent from the people who created them.
And even if someone doesn't find that ethically troubling, and I would argue there's very good reason to, it still creates an enormous tangle of copyright, ownership, attribution, and compensation issues that society is currently scrambling to understand in real time.
The technology arrived before the rules.
And we're all now living in the consequences of that.
In the original post I ended by saying:
"I spent so much of my life learning how to write. I shouldn't have to unlearn that because some computer algorithm learned from me."
I stand by that.
Because at the end of the day, my issue isn't that a machine can generate sentences.
It's that somewhere along the line we've started treating the generation of sentences as interchangeable with the act of having something to say.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming