in spectre

I don’t know much about the world, but it seems like if you take #thor and add it to #music, you end up with #france.

cooking style: i no longer know what a responsible amount of garlic is

Don’t apologize for your English!!! You are trying!! You already sound so good!!! You know more than one language, probably several others and you are an amazing person!!!

When customers ask how I’m doing I generally reply with “can’t complain” because they think I’m doing alright but literally I can’t complain I’ll get fired

the worst thing about zodiac posts is even if you tell yourself you don’t care it’s basically impossible to avoid scrolling to check what fruit tree your sign is

I love dramatically looking out windows on public transportation

The more adventuring a knight does, the more banged up his armor gets. So if you get rescued by a knight in shining armor, you probably got rescued by a really shitty knight.

Platinum, gold, and tungsten never lose their shine and silver plated with rhodium doesn’t tarnish. If you get saved by a knight in shining armor, that knight probably has money out the ass