pasta pizza

Today I put my hand in my backpack and felt a stress ball and I was like “oh? I have a stress ball?” and I squeezed it and it was a pear and it exploded and now I’m much more stressed than I was earlier :/

Ummmm I’m sensitive

pomegranates are proof that god exists and is a sadist

would a kind and loving god make the most delicious fruit in the world have the tiniest ratio of flesh vs pith? would evolution produce a fruit whose seeds are meant for dispersal, yet are encased in an impenetrable leathery rind? god is real and god hates us

Maybe we just need to evolve horse-like teeth

i dontt want you to say that

me , in any public place : Who Here Has A Crush On Me ?

wasn’t expecting this

but arent you glad it hapened

its ears ITS EARS ITS EARS ITS EARS

Sometimes your titties are out, sometimes theyre not