I stare directly into the sun, but...

He’s triggered, traumatised, guilty and lonely but still so on top of his game that he can laugh while duelling death eaters twelve years out of practice and I’m fairly certain at this point that Voldemort would have been a better caregiver and rehabilitator to his released convicts than the Order was to Sirius.

Sirius is constantly dealing with So Much and is still overperforming. He comes up with the ingenious double cross that would have worked if “Wormy” hadn’t screwed them over. He’s the one who was so brilliant that Fudge was certain it would take a team of trained hit wizards to take him down at age 21.

The fact that he’s a threat at all after being in Azkaban’s most secure cell for twelve years and that he figures out what kind of thoughts to cling to maintain his sanity, to have the clarity of thought amongst dementors to be able to formulate thoughts and make plans and stick to them in itself is so indicative of his brilliance.

Sirius and Harry finally meet and it's fireworks.

Sirius/Harry/Remus make no sense for me. Why would Remus be there? It's like the TikTok sound about the woman mad about men being in women spaces that keeps yelling "why would a man be there?!"

Why would Remus be there?

I mean, one would think that a third person would add spice to a dynamic but somehow... it doesn't. Like at all. No spice. I would say it takes away the spiciness of Sirry. And Sirry is sooooo spicy.

A waste really.

(PS: I like Remus as a character lmao I've nothing against him, but I need him to mind his business if we're talking Sirry)

FULLY AGREE with every word. Part of what it appeals so much to me about Sirry is the immediate, mutual obsession. There is something so intense and visceral about the way they take to each other--Harry immediately switching allegiances, able to oscillate so quickly from fearing and loathing the man he thought was responsible for betraying his parents and hunting him to wanting desperately to live with him? Sirius running to Privet Drive just to look at Harry before perusing his vendetta? The mutual hunger for love and affection? There are also so many descriptions of what Harry feels in his body around Sirius (swooping stomach, warm pleasure, a desire for proximity), that just aren't there with other characters. He likes Lupin and trusts him at first, but he doesn't want Sirius.

He and Sirius canonically long for each other's company and long to be together. I understand why not everyone takes the jump to interpret that as romantic like I do, but textually that's such a pervasive sentiment in their interactions. Harry wishing he could write to Sirius, get his advice, live with him, stay with him, even just see his face--literally going as far as to break into Umbridge's office to use the one fire not under surveillance? Sirius openly willing to risk everything just to be a bit closer to Harry. Watching him as Padfoot from the Quidditch stands, coming back to England at the news Harry has had a nightmare and his scar hurt, staying in a cave eating rats to watch over him during the Triwizard Tournament, secretly praying he gets EXPELLED so he will come live with him, wanting to come visit him at Hogsmede, giving him the mirror....they're obsessed with wanting to be near each other physically. It's such a intense palpable chemistry.

Not to mention, their regard for each other is so terrifically plot relevant. Kreacher knows and tells the Dark Lord that nothing in the world means more to Sirius than Harry, and that Harry would drop everything, risk anything to come rescue Sirius. That's not true of Lupin, or anyone else in the order. The way they feel about each other is, in the text, uniquely intense and absolute.

And people can argue all they want it's strictly platonic and that's fine, but the potential those lines could be crossed and that their desire to be close could transgress existing taboos and boundaries? Fits so neatly in with Sirius's Gothic Horror/Byronic Hero elements. Even Dumbledore TEXTUALLY SAYS that the way Harry loves Sirius is not just as a father. That love is, canonically, not limited to paternal love.

Voldemort actively used occlumency shields against Harry in 6th book because of that. Then Dumbledore died and he became lax, allowing Harry visions of his mind and helping in his own hocruxes destruction. Hehehe!

But never using that mind connection for his gain again, because voldemort is scared out of his mind of what is contained in Harry's mind. And that is such huge advantage in war.

Sirius is Harry's dog;

For Harry, Sirius is God, the miracle and only HIS!!!

Ok I actually have more to say about that moment in the ministry because it's SO intense. You're right, its not just Love for Sirius that makes Harry's body uninhabitable: it's desire for death. Not even acceptance or death or lack of fear of death, but profound desire. Harry is begging to die and to join Sirius, and Voldemort cannot take it--that's antithetical to his entire quest for power.

I've said this before but I'll never get tired of talking about it: Harry Potter the series is in many ways about Death. Voldemort's greatest fear and ultimate downfall is death--he seeks immortality above all else, and this is part of what makes him deeply unnatural because death is what makes us human, it's the great equalizer, it's the one thing no one can beat or cheat. She comes for us all in the end, rich poor, powerful, good, evil. And wise people understand that she's not to be feared --all she does is take us to whatever happens after--beyond. But Voldemort cannot accept this, he's determined to master and beat and laugh at death. That's why his followers are called Death Eaters, it's why he makes the horucruxes, and its part of why Dumbledore (who is not afraid of death) terrifies him so. It's why he finds Harry unbearable to be inside--Harry has seen so much death, experienced so much grief, has been touches and marked by death (a theme in OOTP, look at the thestrals), but still he's capable of begging for it. Wanting it. Because of love.

Day 6: Pierce

From Trump Trash Talk to Pragmatic Straight Talk Nobody asked or perhaps cares, but my early choice for the 2028 Democratic presidential nomination is Pete Buttigieg, better known as Mayor Pete. My reason is simple: He speaks clearly and directly, reflecting thoughtful points of view. He isn’t a shrinking violet on issues, but doesn’t spout venom when he speaks. He is reasonable and well-spoken…

in aotearoa, june isn’t our pride, it’s theirs. marsha p johnson and sylvia rivera are their historical figures, not ours. the phrase that “you owe your rights to Black trans women” is true there, but here we owe our rights to (mostly) Māori historical figures. i have the freedoms i do because of the legacy of an entirely different set of people operating in an entirely different context at entirely different times.

But because of american cultural imperialism, most queer people in Aotearoa don’t even know our own queer history. Carmen Rupe, Ngahuia Te Awekotuku, the Dorian Society, Gillian Laundon, Georgina Beyer, and the Wolfenden Association are some of our queer history. We should know their names! we should know what they did for us! but because of the power of the american imperial machine, we don’t.

our national pride month should be july, the month that the Homosexual Law Reform Act passed in 1986. our two largest cities hold their pride festivals in february and march, respectively. american queer history has very little (or nothing, depending on who you ask) to do with our queer history. anecdotally, from my own queries, queer youth in aotearoa know more about american queer history than our own.

“Oops, that was your foot, wasn’t it? Never mind, mercifully you have two. One to spare…”

Lily was laughing, her head dipped back, the loose locks of dark red hair dancing around her shoulders as they went round and round.

One, two, three…one, two, three…

“Oh, god, watch out—!”

“I did tell you I was terrible at this,” said James as they nearly trampled a house-elf and toppled a whole mess of puddings.

“You did,” agreed Lily, through another enchanting burst of laughter, “and I appreciate your honesty.”

“I’m going to twirl you now.”

“Don’t you dare!”

“Ah, Evans, you said the word. Now I have to.”

“What word?”

“Dare.”

— The Last Enemy by @chdarling

snowy day at station