Demigod_Writes

Megatron remembered the scent well because they had been the first thing he had ever smelt that had not been smoke, burnt energon or blasting powder. It had been softer, gentle yet also beckoning with the hint of a thrill. Following the scent had led him to the entrance of the mine he had been assigned to, his station near the exit, and for the first time in his entire existence he had seen the sun. And in the glory of its warmth, sparkling in the attention of its rays, the small cluster of Chyme flowers had grown proud.

To stand in the sun, to see the wonder of a planet he had served his entire life and never had the right to see, and witness such a marvel of a sight as those little resilient flowers blooming in a wasteland had given him hope that maybe his life would not always be as horrid as it had been and that one day he would get to cultivate a garden of his own where he would grow hundreds of Chyme flowers.

The guards had found him not a minute later and for his moment of pleasure they had beaten him within an inch of his life, the last thing he saw before losing consciousness his energon splattered across the delicate white petals, the acidity of his life blood melting them.

He hated Chyme flowers.

The song changed and so did the atmosphere of the room, all eyes shifting to Kira.

Without a word she smiled, hoped off the railing, and made her way towards a larger section of the catwalks where there would be more space for beings of her size to move around. There she met an Optimus who had activated his holoform and now held out his hand for her to take.

Words began to accompany the music, human in nature, but Optimus didn’t seem to care as he began to hum them along with the human singing and pulled Kira’s organic body closer to his holographic one.

They danced, the moves Cybertronian, Megatron having once witnessed his men doing the same maneuvers in a cantina when the war was still new. He had watched them a moment, seen the smiles and the laughter as they pulled apart and stepped together again, guiding one another through the intricate steps.

He shot every one of them, leaving no one to even speak of what they had witnessed. If his army was not going to give their everything to the war, they did not deserve to bear the Decepticon insignia.

“Dang, OP’s got some moves!” the only female of the children, Miko, commented, earning a couple glances from the others, each a soft smile and almost fondness at her words.

He thought fighting Autobots was bad enough. No, a worse fate was being stuck in the scrap heap they called leisure.

Even Barricade was joining in, beginning to sway as the slower song changed into something more upbeat, Optimus taking a couple steps back so the holoform of Ironhide could have a turn spinning Kira around the small space.

This was ridiculous. They weren’t even good. He had seen way better. Johnny would have had much to say about their forms if he was present.

Spinning out from Ironhide, his hand still clasping hers as she was swept away, Kira spotted Megatron standing to the side and smiled, waving her hand for him to join in before she was pulled back into Ironhide’s embrace.

Scoffing only to himself, Megatron turned and stepped out into the darkness, the red sunset now gone and only the cold vastness of space to gaze down upon him. Making his way back to his own hanger, Megatron paused in the center of the room, glaring down at the blank cement floors.

He could still hear the music.

Why? Why invite him to join her? He was her sworn enemy, she his. What made her think she could possibly entice him to join her in such a useless activity?

Was it a ploy to get his guard down, therefore allowing the Autobot’s to gain an advantage over him. They said they wanted him alive and able to fight his variant but they could have changed plans. And how foolish were they, letting him into their base. He could have flown off and found his own variant at any time, the two together attacking this place and killing them all.

“So why haven’t you?” a voice called out into the darkness.

Megatron spun, his konda in his servos and aimed at the speaker before they could finish the sentence.

Kira blinked, the sharp edge of the weapon almost touching her face and yet she had not flinched. Not like he had, though his fast reflexes had covered it up, he hoped.

Her words implied he’d been speaking aloud to himself, a habit he’d had early on in his existence he had thought he’d gotten rid of. Apparently he hadn’t been as self-disciplined as he’d thought.

“You know why.”

Kira studied him a moment, those optics of hers so disgustingly organic and unnerving as they roamed his face. “Guess so.”

And even without her saying more he knew she did know the real reason he had not done what he was apparently muttering. Megatron would never work with anyone. And while he certainly could beat this other Megatron alone, the junk pile apparently so much like him that he would not allow anyone else to fight the battle, it wouldn’t hurt to take a couple Autobots with as distractions to throw at this pretender or keep overly loyal Decepticons from interfering.

That was the exact kind of thinking the little human had been counting on. Primus how he hated how her little mind worked. She knew him far too well. And he knew her too.  

“Why aren’t you dancing?”

Megatron pulled his sword away, securing it to his back once again. “Why do you care?”

“Because the mech who chose Dirty Dancing out of every movie in existence isn’t dancing and I want to know why.”

He could have growled, snarled, picked her up and handed to Optimus with the threat of if she wandered off again he’d kill her. He could have lied, talking about falling in with the enemy or fraternizing with the lower beings. He could have said anything but the truth, but she’d see right through the lie.

And so, after the silence had stretched on and she hadn’t gotten bored waiting for an answer, he replied, “I don’t know how.”

Miners were certainly never allowed to dance. The first time he’d ever heard music was when a new transfer had smuggled an old audio file from the city and played it one night. Megatron had loved it, the majesty of air vibrating at a different frequency creating something that was almost tangible and brought forth so many emotions. He had wanted to run and smile and move and cry. Two days later that mech was taken by the guards and never seen again, his music lost with him. He never even learnt the name of the song.

And then Megatron had joined the pits but the music there was harsh, rough, fueling the rage inside and sending the crowd into a frenzy. And after the war began there was not time for music, or to learn how to dance. There was only carnage and strategy and winning.

Megatron had turned, trying to appear busy as he examined the wall as though it was important, but now he peaked at her as he said those words, waiting for the laughter or the smirk or the teasing. Instead, the little organic was frowning, looking at him as though he was something to understand. And then a sorrow fell over her features, a look he only knew so well because he had, more often than not, been the cause of it over the years.

“You can’t dance.” she whispered, the words laced with guilt and pain, as though his inability was somehow causing her pain. Why was this bug so strange? As quickly as the sadness had come, it left with as a fierce determination took over. She held out her hand towards him in offering once again, “I’ll teach you.”

Megatron chuckled, a bit mockingly at her expense and a touch surprised. Her teach him? Of course she knew how, he had seen her doing it, but why did she think he wanted to learn anything from her? And why wasn’t she mocking him? “I do believe that may be a significant challenge.” He gestured to himself and then down to her.

“We both know you have a holoform.”

Of course he did. Did anyone think he’d let the Autobots have a level of technology he did not? The moment he’d gotten word of these abominations to appear more human and mingle with the lower species he had ordered his scientists to recreate the programing. But why did she have to know that?

Grinding his denta his a growl, he considered his options. And then he considered more.

But as close in thinking to him, this little pest also appeared to be as stubborn and she would not give up. The only way to get rid of it, and save himself from the embarrassment of her pestering him around the others, would be to go along with her little games.

Looking around to ensure no one was near or approaching, he transformed and activated the hologram, his form climbing out of his jet alt mode and stepping onto the ground.

As he approached the human he watched as her eyes, eyes he now mimicked, roamed over his holoform without emotion. He fought the irritation at not knowing what she thought of him. He did not need her approval.

Megatron had not spent much time in his form, using it only twice when he’d desperately desired to watch an earthly movie only viewable in those ridiculously small buildings the humans loved to gather in to watch movies together. It did not mean the change in mass was any less unusual.

His body was still there, still able to feel the cold ground beneath his tires and see his hologramed body move towards Kira, but he also felt what the pixilated body did, the sway on the wind stronger against unarmored limbs, the hanger no longer an obstacle to avoid but now a towering mass of metal surrounding him. And he felt closer to her than ever before, not an equal but on similar standings.

Stopping before her, the music still loud enough to be heard from here, he glared down at her hands held out in offering. “This is ridiculous.” he sighed.

The human smiled, something mischievous. “No. It’s fun.”

Guiding his now human hands onto her body, she explained the basic steps they would take to complete the dance, one to the left, two back with his left foot leading, one to the right, two steps forward with his left foot going first once again. Almost like the moves Optimus had joined her in.

Counting them in, she moved slowly as Megatron repeated her instructions to himself in a mumble, head bent to watch his feet as they went through the steps once, twice, three times. On the fourth try he looked up briefly, catching Kira’s encouraging smile.

Stupid human.

Picking up the pace once he could do it without the muttering, he dared to look up again, sure of himself. The smile wasn’t as annoying this time. “You’re a fast learner.” she murmured.

Megatron wanted to preen under the compliment, but it wasn’t that kind of compliment. This was the soft, gentle kind said in quiet moments that were taken with a tight nod even as shame told you their words weren’t true. Maybe it was praise, the genuine kind and not one fueled by fear or done so in the hopes of winning a favor.

“Want to try going free style?”

What had been tense muscles and sharp moves slowly turning fluid returned to their alertness, Megatron stumbling on the next step and pressing down onto her toes. Kira didn’t even wince.

“Why? We have a good thing going.”

She chuckled, the sound soft as the Chyme blooms scent wafting off her. “Yes, but this is just one step. Dancing is constant movement, changing with each new melody. Sure, you can learn specific steps and limit yourself to them, but life is far better when you don’t know what comes next.”

Megatron sighed, pausing. “You sound so much like Optimus at times I forget which one of you I hate more.”

Without answering him she moved his hands so one grasped her hip and another held out her right hand to the side. Still a Cybertronian position, except a human song now played. “Just feel the music.”

Kira moved, forcing Megatron to copy her as she looked up at him, never once breaking eye contact as she led him from swaying side to side to turning in a square. And then she spun herself under his arm, the tips of her fingers hooked into his own as she twirled once, twice, three times before falling back into him. Instinctively he caught her, hand once again falling to her hip as they continued to sway.

“That wasn’t so bad.”

“I am doing it wrong.” Megatron answered, his attention on making sure he did not mess up or step on her once again that he didn’t even notice the slip of insecurity making itself known.

Kira frowned, but said nothing as she pulled away but kept herself grasping him before turning back into him, her back now pressed to his chest and, as he’d seen Johnny do, he wrapped his arm around her middle. “There isn’t a way to do this wrong. All it is is you and what you feel.” She turned, hands moving once again to where they had been at the start of this new song. “Besides, you haven’t killed me, yet.”

Emboldened by her words, Megatron had decided to guide her into the dip he’d seen plenty of time before on the movie screens and Kira had let him take the lead, halfway through the motion of the move when the last part of her encouragement registered and he froze.

He knew distinctly what she looked like dead, knew the rush of satisfaction that came with killing her, because he’d done it before. And he’d stayed just long enough to see her lying on that desert floor, nothing but a squashed bug.

His human hand tightened where it supported her lower back and even through the coverings she wore he felt how soft and delicate her body was. He wouldn’t even need to be in his true form to kill her, this fake body strong enough to shatter bones.

The Chyme scent got caught in the wind again, and this time she did not just smell like them but reminded him of them. So fierce, growing even in the harshest of conditions. Small and unassuming, but to those who found them they were a precious thing. They bloomed with a fiery, soaking in everything they could from life and shining in defiance to all that surrounded them yet still so fragile. And he had killed them.

Megatron flinched, the past and her dead body flashing through his processor before she appeared again in the present, entirely dependent on him not dropping her as she looked up at him. He had killed her.

The Decepticon warlord had enough sense to pull her back up before stumbling away, reaching out to stabilize her when she wobbled but jerking his hands back before they could touch her again. “I’m sorry.” he breathed, deactivating his holoform.

He saw as she startled at his words, blinking when his holographic form pixilated away and she was alone, turning towards his alt form with an expression he could not understand.

But she had to understand. She had to know why this wasn’t a good idea. The second he defeated his variant and once again commanded an army they would return to being enemies and he wouldn’t hesitate to end her. She was, after all, the human who had blinded him his first battle on Earth all those years ago. She was a threat in her own right.

She had to put this barrier back up between them, for his sake as well as her own. He could not afford distractions.

He could not find more reasons to view this war as a wrong.

Somehow she sensed all this, his silent words enough for her to understand as she turned and started towards the open doors without a word. But then she paused, turning just enough to speak over her shoulder, “I wish we could have been friends.”

And she meant it.

A/N:

Hi! So, if anyone is wondering what a Chyme flower looks like here's where I got the inspo: https://iaconlibrary.home.blog/2018/07/16/cosmicdanger-some-flora-to-go-with-the/#jp-carousel-3348

Malcom and Ellie appeared as we made it to Caesar’s house, summoned by the shouts and horse’s hooves, and it was clear they had not lost hope even as their backpacks sat ready on the porch steps.

“You have to talk to him. Please.”

“And say what?” I challenged Malcom, swinging off Oero and walking to meet them. Luca grunted his disapproval but joined me, signing for the gorillas and chimps with us to make a barrier between us and the rest of the humans. Spears and guns were a good motivator to stay back. “Humans attacked us, ones from the city. They are on their way to find the soldiers as we speak. Why would we want more humans running around?”

“These are good people.” Ellie pleaded, taking a step forward. I stepped back, Luca huffing as he moved to stand between the woman and I. “They just want to live, not fight.”

“We know,” I replied, “but those soldiers won’t see it that way. With them or against them and you will be caught in the crossfire of this war. Caesar isn’t making you leave because he’s scared of them, he’s worried you’ll end up dead and it’ll be his fault.”

“He didn’t start this fight.” Malcom tried again. “Koba did, and if he lets us stay, we can explain that to them. They’ll understand.”

“Like they understood on the bridge?”

The human didn’t bother to meet the stare I watched him with, knowing there was nothing to change my mind, or any way to convince me to try change Caesar’s. These people may not have posed a threat, they might be the ones who shot my family. They may be left alone by the soldiers, they may be the first to die. We didn’t know what was going to happen but one less variable to consider was one less sleepless night or body to burn.

Our decision was made and if any humans here wanted to oppose us… well, that’s why we had the spears and guns.

The thundering of hooves signaled the arrival of Caesar and Maurice and I took their intentions to have a word as my excuse to slip back onto Oreo’s back.

Malcom tried to reason with Caesar again, begging him to let the human stay and help. He pleaded, saying he did not care if he died but he needed to try reach the soldiers and set things right. He believed there was no need for war.

But he failed to understand one thing, something I didn’t know if anyone else could see; Caesar wanted this war.

After our talk the previous afternoon, he’d gone to oversee the scouting and speak to Malcom more, and I’d helped in the relocation of the injured and the females and young. Before dinner Caesar had called council to go over more plans for the war we faced.

I decided to tell them about what Malcom and I had discussed days prior about the humans trying to decide where they might go. San Antiono was an unknown, the luxury city looted and burned to the ground days after the riots started, and Napa seemed like a good place to start afresh, not dependent on a city but starting something new.

I had proposed we joined them, from what I’d heard the valley was large enough to sustain both us and the small human colony. The apes had disagreed for three reasons.

One, Luca did not want to live so close to humans again. One disagreement and it would start a war again and we’d need to fight or flee once more.

Two, Rocket believed humans to be like bears, or the wolves. Once they had our scent, the soldiers would never stop hunting us. Fleeing would only cause them to chase us.

Three, Maurice did not see us making it far enough away in time. With many still wounded and no places along the way for us to stop and rest in safety, we’d never make it before they caught us unsheltered and wiped us out.

Caesar had stayed silent, letting the other three provide enough reasons for me to see we could not leave. We had to stay here and fight, for our home and our future. But in his silence I saw him work through the suggestion and then cast it aside. He agreed we could not run because they would chase us, and he did not want to have humans so close once again. But this war was going to be more than that, it was going to be revenge.

Koba had started this war and Caesar had killed him, but all that rage stored inside from all we had lost and the dangers Koba had now placed us in had nowhere to go. And then humans had attacked while we sought peace and that fire inside was now roaring with the need to lash out burn any who touched it.

He wanted to slaughter the humans not only because it meant keeping his people safe and secured our future in our home, but also so that fury inside had somewhere to go, something to burn, an enemy he could see and watch die.

The humans had shown they would give us no mercy and he was ready to meet them there.

He finally understood how I had felt, understood the madness that had consumed Koba. The monster inside him called out to us. Koba would be pleased to know he once again had a brother who shared his ideals and beyond elated to know Caesar shared his desires. Pissed it took him dying and more apes dying because of humans, but happy Caesar was once again on his side.

Caesar said none of this as he spoke with Malcom, answering in short, angry grunts that his mind could not be changed and the humans were to leave now or they would be prisoners.

I watched as Ellie and Malcom resigned to their fates, the man going to speak to the humans waiting to know if they were being forced from the city or if they could stay. Ellie packed the final supplies into her bag, Alex coming out of the house and Maurice approaching him. I don’t know what was said but they spoke for a while.

The humans didn’t take the news well, shouts echoing across the streets. But when their enemies were a hunting rifle welding chimp and a gorilla with a shotgun, they couldn’t seem to find the courage to fight back much.

“My Love,” Caesar cooed, stepped up beside me and placing a hand onto my knee. “Rocket… want to talk… before they… leave.”

There wasn’t anything more I could do here. In fact the only reason I had come was to ensure they actually left, but with Caesar and Luca here there was no doubt they would make sure all the humans left, even Malcom and his family.

Bending, I kissed Caesar deeply, lingering a moment as we both sighed into the feeling. It would never get old, the rush of endorphins, the feeling of security, the overall rush of pride of knowing I was what he wanted.

“I’ll see you at home, My Husband.”

I giggled girlishly at the grunt he let out, the widening of his pupils giving him a predatory stare as he took a step back so I could turn Oero.

Luca rolled his eyes with a huff. “Took you both long enough.”

Ellie wanted to say something, I saw in the way she watched me as I spun my horse in a circle and pointed him back towards the city, but whatever it was I didn’t want to hear it. More pleading, a caution against our relationship, just some girl advice, I didn’t need it. I was ape now, and they were human. We had our places and hers was no longer in my city.

Offering a one-handed wave, I paused briefly as I passed Alex and Maurice, tipping my head to the boy as he reached out and stroked Oero’s nose. “Don’t forget your sign. It’ll come in handy more than you think.”

He smiled, a blush dusting his cheeks when Maurice agreed, praising his progress thus far. “I’ll learn more in Napa, right?”

“Sure, kid.”

Urging Oero into a trot, I focused solely on Malcom as I approached the group of humans who had seen me kiss Caesar and were now glaring at me with disgust, and some with morbid curiosity. “See you in the summer.”

Not waiting for Malcom’s answer, knowing it’d be something sarcastic, I nudged Oero’s sides and he burst into a gallop, as eager as I was to get out of here and back to our people.

After a rub down and plenty of snacks and water, I went in search of Rocket. Reaching the main level I found it mostly empty this time of day, most apes out scouting or finding food. A few lingered, females taking a rest from caring for the injured a floor below or scouting males who had done nightshifts sleeping.

But there were two apes who caught my attention. Two young apes off to the side, not hiding in the shadows but not out in the open. The female groomed her male suitor, thorough in her work. His wounds had almost completely healed, nothing but raised pink skin that marked the scars of his bear attack.

They were both quiet, deep in thought but not wanting to be alone in this moment of uncertainty. They wanted to cherish what little time they had left together before they became separated for nobody knew how long.

Sensing me watching them, Blue Eyes looked up. Ducking my head, I smiled as I slipped past my son and Lake, wondering if Caesar knew how far their courtship was progressing. We may be welcoming a daughter-in-law and future Queen soon.

Rounding the corner I found Rocket with his back to me, Lily climbing his shoulders. Tinker sat with her back to him, making herself seem busy with a pile of herbs that did not need any more sorting, but it was clear her distraction was merely an excuse for her ignoring him even though hurt radiated from her shaking shoulders.

Cornelius sat off to the side, looking at a map as though he was preparing to venture out into the great beyond.

Clearing my throat, Lily and Rocket turned to me. “You asked to see me?”

Urging the young female to her mother’s side, Rocket led me away from the busy room to where we settled on the staircase alone.

Rocket was quiet for a while, rubbing his hands together in thought as he tried to find where to start this conversation. “You have always been a good friend.” he started, nodding to himself as though that was a good place to start. “You saved me in the sanctuary. We have been close, like a sister. And you-”

He dropped his hands, scowling down at them. It was then I noticed the wetness in his eyes and reached out to place a hand onto his shoulder. He looked over to me and nodded again, reassuring me he was okay while also gathering the strength to say more. And he made sure to keep looking me in the eye as he signed more.

“You saved my son’s life almost at the cost of your own. And it is time I repaid you. I will protect Blue Eyes with my life.”

I gasped, his words striking me right through the heart as my own eyes stung with tears.

“I will protect me with all I have, and if I have to die to bring him home I will lay down my life for your son as you did mine.”

“Rocket…”

How did I tell him that I didn’t not care about a repayment for what I’d done all those years ago? How did I say that all I wanted was for both of them to return home to me alive and well? How did I tell my friend, my brother, that his family was as important as mine? How could say any of that when his promise to die for my son had me begging him to go through with that if it came down to him or Blue Eyes?

“But I must ask more.” he continued, regret shining through those tears. “I know I cannot but I must. Tinker, Ash and Lily cannot join us but while I am away-”

“I will protect them.” I interrupted, signing the words so fast it was the sign language equivalent of shouting out. “You are family. You my brother and your wife my sister and your children my niece and nephew. I will defend them as I do my own. And when you come home again I will still protect them, and you.”

It went against all the rules they’d been forcing me to abide by for days, but Rocket surged forward and hugged me, and I hung on just as tight. And we both cried a little, but that reassurance was what we had both needed, even if had not been needed. I knew he would protect my son, and he knew I would protect his family. We were family.  

An hour later I stood with Tinker and the babies as we watched Blue Eyes, Rocket and Ray check their packs one final time.

“Got everything?” I asked, despite being the one who’d hovered over his shoulder as he’d packed it.

My son nodded, rechecking the fastening that secured his bag to the saddle we had found in the human storages. “Yes.”

“And you will listen to Rocket, even if he tells you to do something you don’t want to do?”

“Yes Mother.” he sighed, turning to me and taking a deep breath as he squared his shoulders.

How had Caesar been this young when he’d led the apes across the bridge ten years ago? Blue Eyes was still just a baby, following any adult who would give him attention around like a little puppy with wide questioning eyes and endless energy. But he wasn’t that little baby anymore, he was his father’s son and the future of our colony.

And just as his father had at eight years old, he was going to do the impossible to ensure apes had a future. One where we could once again be free from humans.

A grunt from Rocket let us all know it was time to go, the older chimp stepping away from where he had been hugging his wife and their children. Ray was already on his horse, the nature of an orangutang meaning he did not have many close enough to say an emotional goodbye to.

“I love you, Baby Blue.”

My son smiled, the gesture unsteady as he clenched his fists to hide their tremors and blinked rapidly to keep the tears away. “And I you.”

Taking Cornelius from my back the boys hugged tightly, Blue Eyes making his brother promise to behave for me. And then I was pulled into the embrace and it took not one but three calls from Rocket for me to finally let go, stepping back so I stood beside Tinker and her children.

The apes made it barely a hundred yards before Blue Eyes leapt off his horse and came barreling back to me, knocking the air from my lungs as he hugged me again. “I… will miss you.” He was sobbing now, the shudders racking his body.

How do parents let their children say goodbye? How did I just stand here and let him ride off on that damn horse knowing I did not know when or if I would ever see him again?

But I was not just a parent and he was not just a son. He was our prince, the hope that our freedom would continue on for generations. For years his father had trained him in the ways of future leader of the apes and now was the time for him to step up and take those skills and become what he was meant to be. “I will miss you too. But I know I will see you again soon.”

Not able to look at me again, and I am glad he did not or he would have seen my tears freely flowing down my cheeks, he turned and hurried to catch up with Rocket and Ray, the chimp offering me a nod and his family a wave before they continued on towards their journey south.

Towards the hope of a land beyond the city in which we can rebuild and grow once more.

Tinker whimpered, Ash sniffing as he tried to dry his eyes as more tears fell. He was not just missing his friend and father, he should have been the one to accompany them as a third but he not yet healed enough and for some reason that seemed to be a great source of shame to him.

Pulling the mother close, and grateful she did not fight me, we leaned into one another as we watched our family ride away. The rest of the colony hoped they would bring back good news of having found a new place for us to live. We merely begged the universe that they returned.

Even if they sent out the rest of the humans, Malcom and his family wanted to fight beside us. They wanted to stay.

Seeing the humans trying to speak to his mate, the silent conversation being had between our eyes, Caesar turned to me with a snarl. I dropped my eyes, focusing instead on my fingers as I picked dirt from beneath my nails. It was all I could do to hide my shaking hands.

Beside me Luca shifted. That snarl, the baring of his fangs, was a clear sign of a threat but it was coming from the king and so while his instinct was to instantly challenge the one who had dared to threaten me, doing so was treason.

Caesar kicked Malcom and Ellie out, having apes escort them back to their homes before continuing in his frantic signing.

He’d been practicing hard to speak, Malcom being a great ally and incentive, but he was still slow at it. Apparently too slow for his thoughts as he signed so fast most apes seemed unsure, glancing around the room to see if anyone knew what was supposed to happen.

The basic gist was he was going to increase the number of scouts throughout the city, most concentrated towards the south to watch for the human army’s arrival while our best hunters and trackers sought the humans who were now no doubt rushing to meet the soldiers.

Additionally all apes were to abandon Koba’s tower today, as soon as the meeting ended. The humans, if they managed to get to the army, would know this was where we were hiding. And the females and young had to be moved again, further away from the water.

We were going to turn what the humans thought they had on us against them and rig this place to blow, using the barrels of gasoline the former human colony had in storage that was of no use to us. We’d wait for the humans to tell the army, and then when they were inside we’d bring the tower down on them. Any who remained would be so disorientated we’d be able to take them out easily.

Caesar paused for a moment, waiting to see if anyone had any objections to his disregard for human life and sudden shift in orders to kill them. No one did, yet he still turned to me with this expectation in his eyes, like he assumed I would try to defend my kind.

I hated humans more than he did. I tried to pick up that made rocket launcher and fire at them myself. Why would I suddenly be advocating for the very species I had been loudly demanding we kill on sight?

Did he know about those kids? Had Malcom told him?

Or was this a test? His anger towards me was so near tangible I had a twenty foot radius of apes avoiding sitting close to me should they be caught in the crossfire of their king’s ire, Luca excluded of course. Was he waiting to see if I would say anything to oppose him so to grant him the chance to finally take all those building emotions and explode with it.

I kept my eyes low and my mouth shut, wishing the apes weren’t such babies and I could have used the large numbers surrounding me to slip out of the room without detection.

The most important orders relayed, Caesar dismissed the apes. They moved with purpose, their new assignments their only priority has they hurried from the room to carry out the orders of their king.

I stood too, a woman on a mission to get as far away from Caesar as I could. I tried to at least.

“Alina!” Caesar roared, the force of his call seeming to shake the windows.

I froze, many apes doing the same before they picked up their pace and all but ran from the room. Most were too scared to even grant me a pitying look as they rushed past.

Luca lingered just beyond touching me, the very tips of his fur a ghost against my bare hand. He stayed until every ape had left, Caesar alone to stare out of the window as his shoulders rose and fell in sporadic jolts in time with his panting.

The ape king tilted his head, not looking at us but letting us know he knew there was still an ‘us’ present in the room. Luca had to go.

I didn’t want to be alone.

I had been scared of Caesar enough times in my life to know the feeling. Our lives started with me passing out at the sight of him, running and running and running for days until finally I had worked up enough courage to stomp across the street and face my fear. And then after his attack on the neighbor I had been so sure I was next I’d gotten myself admitted to the hospital for a panic attack.

I felt that fear again now, deep in the pit of my stomach. The primal kind of fear that overrode any reason. And as I turned to Luca, knowing I had accept he could not stay, I found myself beginning to beg him to not let Caesar kill me.

But I would not force him to disobey his king, even though I knew he would do it in a heartbeat if I asked. And so I nodded, a shaky one that was beyond believable as hot tears filled my eyes.

My guardian, my friend, the gorilla I viewed as someone to look up to and admire and aspire to be like, my dad, nodded back just as disbelieving and signed something about staying outside the door before he cast one final, and thankfully Caesar’s back was still turned or Luca would have been outcast, seething glare to our king before he left the room, closing the door behind him.

And it took all the damn air with him.

Or maybe Caesar was stealing it all, his angered grunts loud enough I could hear the air as he seemed to command it to fuel him for the fight that was to come.

He continued to stare out of the windows, the sun just past midday and starting its journey of descent.

I knew I needed to step closer, approach his side. It’s what he wanted. But even trying to work up the courage to lift a foot felt like preparing to fight a titan. My body trembled, not cold but terrified as I took one step closer and then another and another, stopping a few paces from him.

There was nothing I could do to defend myself when he finally attacked. I was not strong enough, not armed enough, and not brave enough to do anything. All I could do was pray he made it fast.

He turned, nothing too fast or violent, but not in a cool, conversational way. He was preparing to launch into his assault. This was his first move.

I flinched, a whimper catching in my throat as my eyes snapped shut and I ducked my head as I braced for what would come. A strike, a bite, claws.

And for four beats of my heart, four fast beats because my heart felt about ready to jump right out of my chest and leave the rest of me to deal with all this, nothing happened.

And then there was a thud and I snapped my eyes open to find Caesar on his knees before me, looking up at me with parted lips and eyes so horrified it was as if I had slapped him.

I opened my mouth, unsure of what had happened, and just as I thought maybe he’d been struck from behind or shot through the glass, he opened his mouth and whispered, “You are scared of me.” as though it was some grand secret no one was supposed to fill him in on.

“Of course I’m scared of you!” I cried, somewhere between relieved and still on the verge of panic. He’d completely changed his mood the second he noticed I was scared, so maybe he wasn’t about to tear me apart.

And it continued to change as we stared at one another, me breathing heavily because I finally could again and him going through some of the stages of grief before settling firmly in between hating himself and pleading with me.

“Alina…” he started, breathing my name as though it hurt as he tried to reach out to instinctively take my hand. I did not pull away but he froze, looking to his hand extending towards me and my own hand still lightly trembling at my side and he pulled away. “I…”

“You were really angry.” I decided to start, clearing my throat to rid it of the tremble when it was clear he couldn’t say anymore, his eyes frantically searching my face for salvation. “I’ve seen you mad before but that directed right at me, and… and I know you would never hurt me but-”

He flinched, the implication that just for a moment I had thought he would harm me hitting him like a physical blow. He was shaking his head, tears gathering in those hazel eyes I spent so many hours getting lost in. “My… Love, I-”

“I know you wouldn’t” I repeated, “but I know what you can do. And I don’t exactly know why you are so mad.”

In the back of my mind I thought maybe only the knowledge of Koba’s current state could incur such anger but I knew him knowing of him and only reacting on that bridge was impossible.

Caesar stopped shaking his head in a sharp rebuttal that he would ever lay a finger on me in violence to nodding slowly with the understanding of where my fear had grown from. “You ran… towards the fighting… without a moment… to stop… and think.”

“Apes were in trouble.” I answered, once so sure of myself but now looking at him I wasn’t so sure I was right. “I had to help.”

“I know.” He swallowed, reaching out a hand cautiously once more and when I reached out to meet him touch, he my hand with his own, never once breaking eye contact. “I… have lost many… but there are three… who I… cannot lose. You… and our sons. If… any of you die… I will break.”

I knew that, I shared that existence. And we had both just survived that reality, though he had almost died while I had faced losing all three of them. I had been scared too, for just a moment as I turned and see Caesar and Blue Eyes charging behind me, and all I had thought in that second was that I needed to get there first so I could illuminate the danger before they had to face it.

“And… humans.” he growled the word, that fear and that devastation giving way to that rage once again. “Attack… apes. Kill.” And then he looked up to me again, the anger melting into adoration. “You… never follow… orders.”

I huffed, taking a step forward to cup the side of his face, which he leaned into with a fluttering of his eyes and a goofy smile. “Yeah, but that’s why you love me.” I teased.

The smile turned illuminating. “Yes. And you… love me. But… I need you… to be safe.”

I couldn’t be safe and protect the apes. Placing myself out of harm’s way meant leaving them to face the danger. I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night if I knew our apes were dying to protect me, to defend us, and I did nothing. Their sacrifices would be too great.

Especially when the only reason apes were in danger to begin with was because of me.

But then I looked at Caesar and saw that desperation in his eyes, that terror still lingering, and I remembered how I felt watching him fall, riding through that forest at sunrise praying I found him alive but also praying I never found his body because then I could live in the illusion he was still alive.

I couldn’t put him through that suffering because I would never survive that panic again. But if I did as he asked, if I stayed away from the fighting, how would I know he was safe? I knew I could trust any one of these apes but could I rely on them to put themselves between him and the danger?

I would take a bullet for him without hesitation, but would they? Would they be so stupid and suicidal as to risk themselves for their King, as I would my husband?

What I needed, what we needed, was Koba. Yes he would never again follow Caesar’s orders but he would fight like a beast to protect the apes, no remorse or mercy spared for the humans. He would decimate their army. And we needed him out there.

We needed everyone who could fight out there.

Which begged the question, why was Caesar still kneeling on the floor? We had talked, made peace I think. So why was he crouched before me, only touching me in the places I had allowed, sagging into my hand on his cheek as though it was the anchor to his sanity.

Oh shit, he was groveling.

Did I end his suffering, his efforts to beg for my forgiveness admirable, or did I play the cool temptress and let him simmer for a couple days?

Of course I chose the first. We could die at any moment. I needed his entire focus on this war and to not spare a single second I got to have him like this, not the hardened king preparing for battle but Caesar my ape.

I slowly knelt to be on his level, moving to press my forehead against his as his breath hitched, my forgiveness obvious as he snapped his arms forward to wrap around me and pull to us so close together we were one being.

“I need… you safe, My Love.”

There was that term of endearment again. I had thought it was just a heat of the moment thing but if this was to become my name I was not going to complain.

“I need… to know you… and sons… are safe. If I die… you will… rule colony. Need you… to raise Cornelius… and guide Blue Eyes.”

I knew these words meant something, his plea not just a request but the truth of what my new position in the colony was, what he had made me. If anything happened to him I would be who the apes turned to. The one who would have to carry them through the grief and guide my sons as they grew and one day inherited the title their father had fought an entire city for.

But I could not accept these words, that implication that if he died it was not only me who he would leave broken but a legacy and a family and a people who would need someone to take his place.

Nobody could take his place.

“Caesar, you are not dying.” It wasn’t an observation, or me telling him he was being dramatic. I was declaring to the universe that he could not die. My ape would not die in this war we braced for. I would fight man, ape or God if I had to.

He and I would see the end of this side by side, hand in hand, and when we returned to the Redwoods with our sons, we would get to bask in the wonderful life we had once known with our colony and our friends.

Kira laughed again, her shoulders shaking with the sound as she reached out and set her hand upon the child’s shoulder and speaking what appeared to be a reassurance before the young girl smiled and skipped down the stairs.

More students emerged from the school, waving to Kira or offering greetings and small conversations as they headed out for the day. But Optimus did not mind them, his focus entirely on her.

It was so singular that a knock at his passenger door had him startling, his entire cab jumping as he drew his attention to his surroundings. It took all his strength to not transform on the spot, remembering where he was just in time.

Jack, Miko and Raf also flinched at the Prime’s action, leaping back from his form with yelps of surprise.

“Jeez dude,” Miko chastised, frowning up at his empty windows. “It’s just us. What’s got you so scared?”

Opening his door, he allowed the children’s distraction of getting into the car fill the silence as he forced his erratically beating spark to once again settle. It was not their fault he had been distracted. Or that his attention was once again back on the human woman, watching as she waved to a group of boys unlocking their bikes from a row.

“I was…” he forgot he had been speaking, the woman finally turning to face directly towards him.

Those eyes, clear from the exhaustion she usually wore, really did shine. Brighter than the stars, brighter than the Well of the Sparks, brighter than the crystal trees back in the gardens of Iacon’s Institute of Learning. They were brilliant, and they were locked on him.

Optimus felt his engine shudder, his cooling fans kicking on as his spark began to pound in his chest, seemingly ready to leap right out of his spark chamber. Why did he feel the need to run, yet also so desperate to remain entirely still so he could continue to bask in her glow?

He had seen Kira dozens of times before, and up until a few moment ago he had been furious with her for tricking him into taking her into his base only to use his Ground Bridge and endanger himself and his team as she marched off to find Megatron and attempted to bring the warlord back to his base.

The last he’d seen of the woman she was in Megatron’s clutches before the war hunger lunatic had transformed and sped off into the sky. And Optimus had been so mad at her a part of him wished they would fly off together and he would never have to see her again.

And now she was here, at the school with her longer hair gently swaying as she moved with such a soft grace to her and kind eyes that held hope and love for the world around her and Optimus did not know which way was up or down.

She had stolen his gravity, taken it for herself so that he had no choice but to be pulled towards her.

What was happening?

“Oh!” young Raf chirped, once again startling Optimus though this time he managed to stay still. “You can see Ms Hecale. She’s the new history teacher. She started yesterday. She looks just like Kira, right?”

“Dude!” Miko squealed, moving forward to press herself against Optimus’ dash to get a better view. “She does! Is she Kira’s doppelganger?”

Jack hummed, already seated with the seatbelt secured across his chest. “Must be. She looks identical to her.”

Kira’s variant? Well that explained everything, the happiness, the change of appearance, even her smile.

The smile that was being sent right towards him as she raised her hand and gave a small wave.

His previously shuddering engine stalled entirely, his fans blasting so hard the air came rushing out the vents pointed directly at the kids, earning him squeaks of surprise as they recoiled from the blast of cold.

“Optimus? What is going-”

“Oh my gosh!” Miko cheered, cutting off Jack and jumping up and down in her seat.

“What?” both human boys asked in unison.

“Optimus has a crush on Kira!”

Oh Primus…

---

“You know there’s four guys in weird suits sitting outside holding a bunch of wires, right?” a voice called, one familiar but also not. Someone she’d met recently.

Turning in her chair, Kira found three human teenagers and the big green Autobot walking into the hanger. “Yeah. The suits are supposed to protect them from the potential radiation poisoning or something. It’s punishment for yesterday, they have to help Wheeljack.”

Bulkhead winced, a sympathetic laugh escaping him. “Ouch. I wouldn’t wish that on Decepticons.”

Outside brakes squealed and a moment later two new guards came running in, the children already making their way up towards Kira. “Stop! You can’t be here! You cannot just step over the fence and-”

“Then make a taller fence.” Bulkhead interrupted, already moving to sit on a Cybertronian friendly bench Hound had welded together yesterday from the scraps of the hanger that was no more. The pile of scrap metal was proving to be far more useful than it had been as a functioning hanger.

Huffing a laugh at the big lug’s response, Kira turned her attention to the soldiers. “It’s okay. They have clearance.”

She didn’t know whether that statement was true or not but word of her ability to have you assigned to helping the ‘lunatic scientist robot’ meant nobody was questioning her. Without some much as a glance to one another to see if they were buying her story, they nodded and both guards hightailed it out of the hanger.

“You know Megatron is here, right?” Kira addressed Bulkhead, in Universal, turning to smile at the kids as they approached her work area.

“Yeah. But they would not stop nagging to come see the Dinobots again. He’s locked up, right?”

Primus knew. Everybot seemed happy to settle into a new normal of base life and so unless they were causing trouble, Kira was lucky to not know where everyone was and that they were doing. It wasn’t exactly peaceful, the silence that occasionally settled over the base making her do a radio check just so they all knew she was onto whatever plot they were coming up with, but not having them sticking to her was a rare treat.

For the first time in years, she had completely alone in the hanger for more than five minutes. She’d started to hate it a minute in but just as the fomo was about to get her to move, four lovely little distractions walked in.

“Sure.” To the kids, she said. “You want to ride dinosaurs again?”

Technically they were still in time out, banished to one side of the base while the Knights were forced onto the other side. From all the accounts Slug had been the one to make the first move. Maybe forcing them into babysitting duty would discourage any future attempts to start a fight club in the middle of base.

Miko’s eyes lit up, the girl jumping to her feet. “Yeah!”

“Actually,” Jack started, glancing over to Raf, “we have something to tell you.”

“Oh?”

Little Raf shifted, pushing his glasses up his nose. “We met your doppelganger. She’s the new history teacher at our school.”

Kira remembered to look surprised just in time, humming in interest. “Well, that must’ve been weird for you.”

“Yeah. And guess what?” Miko was practically bouncing on her toes. “Optimus was a big ol’ crush on her.”

Kira damn well hoped so. She hadn’t spent weeks finding her variant of this world and then enlisted the help of Fowler to have Jasper High magically needing a history teacher after their previous one retired overnight for the gentle giant to not.

Of course she’d noticed his feelings towards her, she knew her own Optimus better than she knew anybody. And those little glances and that protectiveness didn’t mean nothing. She’d met her own Optimus was she was just a child herself, but this Kira was older and carried far more experiences of a weary world over an adventurous one.

One afternoon doing a background check revealed she hadn’t had that much different of a childhood from Kira’s, if the hospital records were anything to believe, and while this Kira had not joined the military as she had, her adult life hadn’t exactly been cupcakes and rainbows. A fresh start in a town where no one knew her would be exactly what she’d want, and since she was a teacher it wouldn’t have taken long for Optimus to find her.

This Kira needed a little love from the big guy, or at least the chance to take some cool trips through the ground bridge and travel the world while living in a world of adventure. A girl’s gotta look out for herself, no matter the universe.

“He does?” Kira played along, smiling and the little children getting so excited, already plotting how to get the adult to their base. And then her own Optimus walked in. “Hey Octopus, guess what? My doppelganger just moved into town.”

That caught his attention just as the kids parroted, “Octopus?”

“An old inside thing. One of the humans we worked with, Lennox, his daughter couldn’t say Optimus when she started talking so she’d called him Octopus.”

Turning to Optimus, Kira found his brows furrowed, his go to expression when he was deep in thought and thinking a situation through as he weighed all the pros and cons. “Should we perhaps reach out?”

Kira snorted. “The only reason your doppelgangers took all this well is because you’re used to this kinda thing. You want a human to learn about interdimensional portals, infinite multiverses and aliens in one go?”

Optimus shrugged. “If she’s supposed to be you, you would handle such news well.”

Kira supposed he did have a point, but she could only handle all this well because she had had years to get used to it all. If this had happened her first day of N.E.S.T training she would have flunked out immediately. Besides, doppelgangers weren’t clones.

“Yeah, well look how close you and your variant are in personality.” Kira mumbled, earning her a half-hearted glance that barely passed as a glare. “I think we should leave her alone. She clearly isn’t in this world now and unless she is in danger, we should keep it that way.”

Silence settled for a few seconds as everyone either agreed with her or thought of a good counter argument before Bulkhead broke it, a scenario Kira hadn’t even imagined coming to him. “What if our Decepticon’s think she is you? They already know what you look like.”

Before she had the time to argue, barely able to hum in consideration at his words, a heavy set of pedsteps announced someone else approaching soon, his shadow falling across the base’s floor long before he entered.

“I heard there is some kind of invasion of human offspring in this base.” Megatron drawled, sauntering into the room and looking to Kira with a lazy smirk. “I do hope it is not contagious.”

“Ha!” Kira barked, standing to place herself between him and the kids after Bulkhead nearly shot himself in the face trying to get his cannon fired up and aimed in the right direction. Optimus watched him with a bored expression. “You wish Meggsy. My spark belongs to another.”

Genuine interest flickered across his faceplates as he stopped, looking down at the little humans. “Oh? Pray tell.”

“Ultra Magnus of course. His poems of all he has seen on the battlefield are quite majestic. A small, weak-minded femme can’t help but swoon for his deep insight and expertise in the arts of words.”

She hated Ultra Magnus’ writings. Jazz had showed them to her once from some archives saved on an old data pad that had survived the trip to Earth. She was purely poking fun at Megatron, Optimus having once recited the poem Megatron had written and shared with him when they were still friends. But he didn’t know, so the seemingly love-struck words would pierce a deep little insecure part of him he managed to keep locked away until someone knew exactly how to burrow under all that armor and pierce it.

The words of his poem themselves were beautiful and soul destroying, reflecting his life as a miner and thus a disposable tool used by the former government of Cybertron easily discarded once he no longer served a purpose. If Kira were braver, she would have tried to ask him about it. She was, after all, merely trying to get a rise out of him and in no way mocking his talents or what he’d written.

She saw the effect her words had, and they weren’t what she’d intended, the tightening of his jaw as his eyes went from mirthful to mournful before that cool mask of evil slipped on. “Hmm, can’t say his death was memorable.”

Ultra Magnus was still very much alive in a galaxy far from Earth, keeping the Autobot fight strong as they battled Decepticons on a distant plant. And he knew that.

Scoffing with an eye roll, to hide her own shame at the sadness she’d caused him, Kira turned to the teenagers. “Children, Lord Buckethead. Meggy Moo, the children; Jack, Miko and Raf.”

Names were sacred to Megatron. He liked knowing the name the Bot had chosen for themselves before he killed them. After not having one, he placed value on the word for everyone he met. And so while he would insult the children, belittle them, threaten them, he wouldn’t forget their names. Even if him chose not to use them.

“Ahh, you name your rodents on this planet. How thoughtful.” To Bulkhead he barely glanced to the muscle mech as he said, “Relax Autobot. If I wanted you dead, I would have killed you already. And I don’t waste my time squishing dugs.”

Kira could name at least seven humans she’d personally know that Megatron had ‘squished’. Eight if she counted herself.

“The Autobots are going to kick your aft!” Miko yelled, Jack smacking his hand over her mouth.

Megatron roared with laughter, real laughter. And then he smiled something real too. “I like this one.”

“Well don’t get too excited trying to recruit any more humans, she’s spoken for.”

It was Megatron’s turn to roll his optics, though the dramatics of it combined with his sigh were entirely for show. “Why are all you little pests to loyal? You are like cyber rats, following a turbo fox in the hopes it will share a scrap of energon with you.”

“What do you want?” Kira fired back, taking no offense. She’d seen plenty of cyber rats since moving to Cybertron and most of them were nice enough company, when they weren’t trying to eat her thinking she was a strange new form of food.

“Those twin shape shifting idiots are making a noise outside my hanger. Unless you want me to deal with it in the ways I want to, I suggest you go over there and stop them.”

Picking up a cap resting on her desk, she settled it onto her head and jerked her chin for the kids to follow. “We’ll use them as bait.”

“Bait?”

Kira wasn’t even sure if she’d seen the live action Aladdin. She mostly used movies as a chance to catch a nap while her Bots were distracted. When had they made one of those?

The last three days had been a whirlwind enough, all she’d wanted to do was sit down and do nothing while something mindless droned on in the background. This was not what she’d wanted.

After stumbling through the forest and finding Optimus waiting for them, him scowling at Kira seated on Megatron’s shoulder, the Prime had started to argue with his own doppelganger, going on and on about how he could have allowed her to do something that stupid.

Megatron had enjoyed the show far too much, standing to the side with a beaming smile so wide Kira had wondered if it hurt as he watched the two argue back and forth, his head snapping side to side like it was a tennis match.

Then this world’s Optimus had refused to allow Megatron into his base. Or rather Ratchet had refused and Optimus hadn’t really said much back and so a solution as to how they were going to get Megatron back to the States needed to be found.

Megatron came up with one, transforming while still holding Kira and taking off to race across the sky in his jet mode, having her provide the location along the way. Was it a genius idea to give the guy who would very soon be leading the Decepticons the location of a base for Autobots? No, but everyone was too busy arguing and she was twenty thousand feet in the air with a mech who could fly faster than sound and she got air sick so not much thinking was going on at that moment.

She was sure they’d all regret it soon enough.

Arriving at the base, Optimus thankfully having gone ahead to warn the humans that the jet flying in at Mach a million was Megatron, it was a shit show. Greeted by thirty bots ready to fire away, Kira had managed to convince Megatron to go wait in one of the empty hangers while she spoke to the Autobots, which led to hours of talking and explaining and reasoning until finally they had somewhat agreed to not act on their instincts of violence so long as Megatron stayed in hanger five, the newly dubbed “jail”.

Then came General Bryce, storming into the hanger and demanding to know “Just why in the hell Megatron was sitting in one of his hangers”. Que three more hours of discussions.

And then came the transmission, the two remaining Decepticons had been targeted by a missile strike. One body, or rather pieces of one, was observed but the other was not at the site. Of course Barricade had gotten away. Kira was really beginning to question what kind of plot armor Primus had granted the old police mech.

Thus started the search for him, and then the capture aided by the Autobots, and the third hours of talking as everyone was forced into a base and ordered to get along because nobody liked being stranded on an alien planet in the wrong dimension but everyone was just going to have to make do.

And now, in an effort to get an hour of peace, Kira had somehow started a base wide debate and nobody actually knew the topic of. Hey, at least some of the Autobots were agreeing with Barricade.

If he was out of the “jail”, where was Megatron?

Kira needed a vacation after this. A nice, long break where she could sit on a sandy white beach and no responsibilities or aliens demanding her attention. Maybe Simmons would be willing to let her crash on his couch in Cuba for a few weeks. He did still owe her for the interviews she’d done for his book.

“Can we please just pick a movie?”

“Dirty Dancing.” a deep voice called out across the room, gaining lots of attention.

From the Autobots because their swore enemy was casually leaning against the hanger with his arms crossed, and Kira because when the hell had he sat through that?

“It’s a classic.” he defended when Kira’s alarmed expression was the only one he focused on.

Suddenly Kira remembered seeing a brief headline from a couple years ago, sometime between the chaos in Hong Kong and Optimus returning with Cybertron, that Megatron had taken over DisneyWorld for the day. There had been dozens of pictures taken by park goers brave enough to stay and cast members sent in to news broadcasts of the warlord posing with the different characters and crouched down as he squeezed into a theater to watch one of the shows.

Was he secretly a movie geek?  

When no one objected, mostly because they were too busy glaring at the one who had caused the annihilation of their home world and then slaughter of millions, Kira took her chance. “Perfect. No one’s complaining. Dirty Dancing it is.”

The objections came rolling in fast, all drowning one another out as some had an issue with going with Megatron’s choice and others’ moaning about the actual movie choice. They all fell on deaf ears though because Kira already had the iPad out and Dirty Dancing loading as it projected onto the wall of the hanger.

All the whining died down once the first few notes played and the opening credits started, more than half her team iPad kids deep down in their sparks. The only two who seemed to remember they were in the presence of Megatron, and Barricade passing around a roll of JaAm constructed into a gummy roll-up, were Ironhide and Jazz.

After three days they finally no longer felt the need to walk around with their cannons out all the time, electing to only do so when Megatron dared stick his head out of Jail. Which reminded her…

“Hey Megs, how did you-”

To answer her question, Slug came crashing through the wall. Bots scattered to avoid the flailing triceratops, most wise enough to high tail out of the hanger as the dinobot took out the entire western wall, the ceiling beginning to slant as the instability threatened to have the entire metal structure collapse.

With a short order to hold tight, Ironhide charged out with the rest of who remained, Megatron standing by at the entrance to hold up what was quickly becoming a collapsing exit. He waited until every bot made it out, straining under the weight as Wheelie moved as fast as his RC pick-up could go, before taking a step back and letting the metal hanger fall into itself.  

A roar and the orange blast of fire pulled drew everyone’s attention in time to see Grimlock charge Dragonstorm, three heads of dragon snapping at one t rex as he tried to shove them over. Strife circled above, whether he was helping in the attack or just a spectator unclear. Scorn lay to the side, in the process of standing up but one leg was obviously damaged, his techno organic joints sparking.

Well there lay the answer, a distraction of the guards led to their escape.

“What did you do?” Kira demanded, turning to glare at Megatron.

The warlord bristled, offended. “Nothing.” And the way in which he said it, the actual hurt that flashed in his optics for a moment as he realized Kira assumed he’d caused this, told her he truly had not started this fight.

But then who the hell had? For years the two teams had simply ignored each other, acknowledging both were powerful in their own rights and left it at that. Why now were they having an all out brawl when they could have done this at anytime when they’d had the entire planet of Cybertron to romp around on and sulk after.

And where in the name of Primus was Optimus?

---

Optimus felt the energon in his fuel lines boil as he clenched his denta to keep still, his arms crossed over his chest to hide his servos clenched into fists so tight his digits left dents in his palm.

On the catwalks four human males stood in a perfect line, heads held high and shoulders back. The confidence of their posture did nothing to hide the absolute terror in their eyes as they stood facing their executioners.

“I don’t know what backwater shitholes you were raised in-” General Bryce was still going on, walking up and down the line as he screamed so hard his face had gone red and now it was beginning to turn purple.

Optimus had been on the drive back from a meeting with General Bryce, the topic being if Kira could be trusted since she had already proven she would go against his and the humans General’s wishes. Already irked that a human had dared question her, he was beyond enraged to find the Dinobots and Dragonstorm locked in a battle that was tearing the base apart.

He’d charged without question, Megatron rushing to his aid while his team evacuated, and in short time both mechs had the five beasts restrained or unconscious.

The humans had driven over in a fury, a fair amount of yelling going on from everyone as the humans blamed the Cybertronians for being unruly and the Cybertronians defending themselves until Bumblebee had noticed four humans, the guards who had been stationed at the gates, looking guilty as they stayed at the back of the group. It took very little questioning and a simple threat from Megatron to have them all confessing they had been talking about who would win in a fight between the two warrior classes in a brawl, not knowing they all had hearing far more advanced that humans and had taken the challenge and insults to heart.

To start their punishment, General Bryce was giving them a very public tongue lashing, all Cybertronians gathered around to enjoy it.

Or maybe they would if the adrenaline wasn’t still coursing through their lines, fanning the fire in their sparks.

“We should just kill them all.” Ironhide grumbled being sure to say it in English so they understood him as he activated his cannons and took aim at the humans. One whimpered, but to his credit he stayed still.

“Want to call your dog off?” Agent Fowler directed to Optimus, seeing that was going to take this already volatile situation and send it directly into a shitshow.

“Ironhide,” Kira called softly, her own arms crossed as she stood leaning against the catwalks near her guardian, watching everything with that quiet gaze.

Kira reminded Optimus of Megatron sometimes, not that he enjoyed the comparison or would dare say it aloud now with the warlord constantly within earshot. But they would both reacted the same way when facing a puzzle to solve or when facing something new.

They got quiet, letting whoever was running their months walk themselves right into a trap. Or they watched, so silent and unmoving they faded into the background, and with that veil they could observe everything happening as they went about ignored by the rest of the room.

It was startling how much Kira could remember, her tiny human brain so underdeveloped when compared to the complicated processing unit Cybertronians had. Most chose not to use it, but each one of their kind had vast networks that could store millennia of data memories and comprehend enormous amounts of information within moments. Sometimes Optimus felt Kira could do more.

She remembered small off-handed remarks made decades ago, identify a new scratch smaller than her own finger on a mech halfway across the room, sense when a verbal disagreement would turn physical before the parties involved did.

And she could use weaknesses you didn’t even know you had against you.

Glancing across the room, Optimus saw Megatron concealed in the shadows in the exact same position Kira was, his own optics roaming across the men as he studied each of them and took in how they reacted, who they feared more, how much of their grimacing was remorse or terror.

He knew the comments of Kira making a good Decepticon had she joined the other team were just said to rile him up, an inside joke he and the human had shared for a few years now, and while Optimus knew she would have made a terrible Decepticon, her little human heart too big for such a small body, the words did dig into his side as a reminder of how alike the two were.

General Bryce had continued his reprimanding, finally stopping to take a breath as he turned to face Optimus. “Do you have anything to add.”

The prime hummed, turning his head to the side to do a slow glance over the men, delighting in their squirming. “On Cybertron, such a crime would be considered instigating a mutiny and would be resolved through death.” A lie, every word of it, but these trembling humans did not know that. He uncrossed his arms, reaching back to unsheathe his sword. “May I have the pleasure?”

“Optimus.” Kira’s tone to anyone else would have been dismissive, perhaps even a little bored as she called him off, but he knew her and that was her trying very hard to not laugh at the men now looking paler and about ready to desert their cause as they bolted from the hanger and kept on running until they never saw desert again.

Taking her order, the prime turned and began to stride out the room, glaring at the smug almost friendly smirk Megatron watched him with.

“Wait, where’s he going?” Agent Fowler asked. “I thought he was Prime?”

Optimus felt his spark swell with pride as Kira replied, “He is. You never asked who was in charge, you just assumed Optimus being a Prime meant he led the team.”

While stupid in their nature, those human men simply acted as human men did. Their actions and their punishment were not worth his time or attention. His team was more than capable of playing the big, scary Autobots and scar them for life.

“Maybe they want to talk?” Rocket signed, but even his hands seemed hesitant, like he wasn’t believing it but was certainly hoping someone would agree with him.

His words did cause a reaction though, the apes around us standing so tense with hackles raised and snarls on their faces shifting with the possibility they would not need to fight after all.

“We don’t have any working radios. Maybe we could signal them? I see a couple-”

A long call echoed out across the silent bay, a sound made by orangutang males to warn of danger. It was coming from the south end of the bridge placing the danger between us and the city. Voices followed shorty after, shouting and more apes began to scream. And then a gun fired.

I was running before Caesar had the chance to grab me, leaping onto Oreo’s back and spurring him on into a wild gallop, the two of us tearing down the street as the apes saw their Queen charging and they rushed to join the crowd heading towards the humans.

How had the soldiers managed to reach the shore? Luca had watched them in the early hours of dawn as they approached the bay from the north and then stopped, not moving for hours. He said no smaller boats had left the main vessel so there was no way they could have beached.

Did they have scuba gear? Really good divers?

How many had made it? How much fire power did they have? Where they purposely cutting us off from the city because they had a plan to launch an attack there, knowing our vulnerable hid amongst the buildings or was this them underestimating us?

More guns fired, the roar of mechanical thunder deafening. And then there was the thunder of hooves, Onyx and Coal flanking Oreo and I, Caesar and Luca on a war path just as I was. And behind them Rocket and Blue Eyes brought more reinforcements.

Caesar wanted a show of strength? This was our show of strength. You don’t block our path home.

Making to the fight, the line of humans against apes spanning across the bridge, I faltered as we approached. They weren’t military. Hell, they weren’t even coordinated. They only had one gun and the guy using it was currently cowering behind two men who were screaming swears at Ray the orangutang, waving knives back and forth to keep the snarling ape at arm’s length.

They were humans who had survived Koba’s attack, likely ones Blue Eyes had freed as a distraction. Not all of them were finding their way to Malcom or making their way out of the city. This group, mostly men, had been hiding out on the beaches waiting for their chance to strike back.

Seeing the ship probably gave them hope.

Halting Oero a short distance behind the line of advancing apes, I considered my options. It was only a matter of time before the guy with the gun either grew some balls or someone took it from him. As per Caesar orders the apes weren’t firing at the humans but rather in the air, scaring them but not attacking. Humans who did advance were knocked down but not killed.

They would figure out our bluff soon enough.

Reaching back for an arrow, I notched it and took aim, closing my eyes as I inhaled deeply before snapping them open, locking in on my target.

I had not been an expert the first time I’d drawn back my bow. It had taken me months to even hit a tree, let alone a standing deer. But starvation is an excellent motivator and mostly through luck I became decent enough to hunt for survival. Since moving in with the apes I hadn’t needed to rely on myself alone to survive and while I had practiced only as form of defense, I was still good enough to hit something.

I released my string and the arrow sailed through shrieking apes and violent humans, sinking into the hand of the man with the gun. He screamed, dropping the weapon while stumbling back. His cries were distraction enough for two chimps to rush forward and disarm the two men defending him, one grabbing the gun as they rejoined the line of apes pushing the humans back towards the city.

Seeing their cause lost, one human gave the order to retreat and they did, sprinting back south. Towards the city.

If they managed to get back they wouldn’t be able to hide out on the beaches like they had been. They’d disappear into the city, some still armed and the fight in them strong. They’d scatter, desperate for any little hideaway they could find.

We would lose them and they could go anywhere. The wounded, the females and babies, Cornelius.

We could not let them get off this bridge. We needed them to surrender and for Malcom to convince them to leave.

I prepared to spur Oreo on once again, planning to race past them and put myself between them and the barricade at the end of the bridge, when an order was barked from beside me.

“No!” Caesar cried, every ounce of power he held over us bleeding from that word so strong we froze, turning to our king to see what he was forbidding. Only, he wasn’t calling out to the apes who had begun to give chase, or the apes who’d readied their weapons to shoot the fleeing humans in the back. He was scowling at me, his demand for me alone.

“Stay.” he bit out the word as he urged Onyx to take a couple steps forward, turning his attention to the apes once more. He signed quickly, his plan the same as it had been a decade ago. Go beneath the bridge, ambush them, box them in. Malcom would do the rest.

The apes acted immediately, swinging over the edge of the rusting once international orange railings and beginning to use evolution to their advantage.

Caesar turned, not my mate or my friend looking back at me but my king, the King of the Apes. He was all rage, with his nose scrunched and his brows low as he breathed heavily with his chin raised  to look down at me. This wasn’t annoyance, or fear concealed behind anger. It wasn’t the almost giddiness he got when we’d get into our usual spats because I was at least talking to him and looking at him.

This was pure rage. And for the first time in my years of knowing him, I dropped my gaze.

I usually fought for the sake of a fight, jutting my chin out and angling my head up, daring him to say something. I let him know that while I knew he was the king and I would always respect him, I would not roll over or tuck tail and run.

But I did that day. Something in his eyes, in what he wasn’t saying and wasn’t doing, had me knowing on a primal level that if I did not pull away from him, if I dared to challenge this superior predator now, I would live to regret it.

Caesar turned to Luca, the gorilla no good at climbing and opting to stay on the bridge to await further order, and began to sign something about keeping me back but he didn’t get a chance to finish, a deafening boom sounding to our right.

An ape far below screamed, and then the boom sounded again.

The ship was firing at the apes below the bridge.

I hardly had a chance to turn towards the ship before Luca was gripping my shoulder and yanking me from Oreo’s back, the horse dancing around in fear, and shoved me down behind the guardrails and throwing himself over me.

The ship fired again, and again. More apes screamed. They were sitting ducks, easy targets as they swung under there with no cover.

“We have to give them cover! We have to get them back up!” I screamed to Luca, but his answering grunt could have meant anything from ‘we’re working on it’ to ‘shut up and hide’. There was nothing we could do while that 5-inch gun had us locked in its scope.

Our assault rifles could do nothing at that distance.

The gun fired again and I flinched, turning my head as more screams surrounded me. Doing so cast my field of vision across the bridge to where a pile of our munitions was abandoned, among it the shoulder missile launcher.

“Luca,”

The gorilla grunted again, using a hand to shove my head down.

Fuck. That.

I jammed my elbow into his stomach, his flinch enough of an opening to weasel my way out of his hold and break into a sprint.

Thirty yards, that’s all I had to do. Thirty yards and I’d make it. The guns were aimed behind me, chasing the apes. Another shit fired, they were focused there.

“Alina!” Luca roared, but I was well out of his reach by then.

Skidding to a stop, I dropped to my knees and slipped the rocket into the barrel. I had no clue what I was doing but from all those military movies my dad had me watching it looked easy enough. Rocket in, onto the shoulder, aim, fire.

Only this shit felt like it weighed a hundred pounds and I was still trying to get it loaded.

To save me from my embarrassment of even trying to lift it, a nearby gorilla shuffled over to me and helped grab the machine so I could get the rocket all the way in.

“Aim and pull the trigger.” I signed, taking a step back and then another as he rose to his feet and hefted the launder onto his shoulder, tilting his head to aim through the scope.

The ship had fired three times more as I’d raced over and loaded the launcher, and it fired one more time, it’s final time.

Ajax didn’t flinch as he pulled the trigger, the kick of the weapon nothing to a full grown male gorilla. The rocker raced towards the ship with a whoosh, slamming into the hull just a few feet below the gun that had been firing.

Fire bloomed from the blast, smoke traveling up in a beautiful veil to block the gun’s view. Whether Ajax had intended that or it had just been a lucky shot, either way it blessed us with the very thing we needed, cover.

Caesar hurled himself over the railing, several apes with him as they rushed to find who remained and if there were any injured they could help. Luca thundered up beside Ajax and I, him not looking at me all I needed to know.

But I couldn’t focus on that now. I could see figures running about across the deck of the ship, humans frantically darting about as they prepared. For another weapon? No, a retreat.

The waters churned, the ship beginning to move. They were backing away, turning out towards the sea again and banking south.

Malcom had finally made it to us, panting as he moved to stand beside me and watching as they went. I took the binoculars from his hands, scanning across the ship to see men scrambling to man weapons in the chance we fired anything more at them.

And then I saw him, a man stood on a catwalk outside the wheelhouse with his own pair of binoculars aimed right at me. We couldn’t see one another’s eyes, but I knew in that moment we were face to face. Challenge meeting challenge, foes getting their first glimpse of who would become their enemy.

The humans may have fired first but we fired back. We were at war.

I’d never liked chess, at all, but Caesar had made sure I knew how to play a decent enough game with him. Now all his hours of strategies and plans would pay off.

I forced my neck to move to the side, grunting at the pain and flinching with the crack before turning the other way. “I told you, humans called other humans to come help after you attacked. A human army is arriving on a ship any day now and you are going to help me kill them all.”

“What… Caesar plan?”

What a great question. And for the amazing answer; “Show strength.”

It was silent a moment, my back once again to the bonobo as I moved onto my knees and arched my back before concaving it, trying to gain the ability to move without feeling like I was a hundred years old. And then Koba hissed and I turned to see him trying to sit up.

“Hey, woah woah woah woah woah, where do you think you are-” I crawled towards him, placing a hand onto his chest and gently pushing to try urge him to lie back. In response, he used his unbandaged arm to shove me away.

Even injured he was strong, the force not only knocking me flat on my ass but doing so with enough force I landed on my back, my head thunking onto the cold wooden floor.

I sat back up with a grunt. “Motherfucker, I am trying to help you. You are going to rip your stitches.”

“Need… warn ape. Find… weapons.” He tried to get up again, using his uninjured arm to try hoist himself up. Only the side with the working hand was the side with the stitches and pulling against them had him crying out in pain and he flopped back onto the floor with a strangled gasp.

A responsible adult would have seen this as a sign he did care for the apes, that his first instinct upon hearing what was happening was to say that he needed to warn apes against listening to Caesar and to arm themselves. Sure, they would have noticed the flaws in the fact that he was basically doing the same shit he’d just done which was go against the wishes of the king and try start an uprising, but the main idea was there.

I wasn’t a responsible adult, and somehow petty childhood squabbles felt more satisfactory as an unresponsible adult. “Told you.”

He growled but remained on the floor, wincing up at the ceiling. “They… will die.”

“I know.” I scooched over just enough to bump my foot against his own. “Which is why you need to get better. With you out there, we can do some damage while he leads the apes on peace talks.”

And though I would never, ever, admit this to him, he was a lot smarter than me. And stronger. And better at tracking and planning attacks. I needed him far more than he needed me.

He didn’t say anything, or move, or even acknowledge my touch. Good, that meant he was coming up with plans. That meant we had a chance.

“Stop moving around and hurry up and get better. We have a hard fight ahead of us.”

Rekindling the fire and getting him a pillow, I left Koba there in search of breakfast for us both, finding some fruit trees nearby and leaving him with most of them as I found Oreo and we made our way back to the human colony.

Stopping off for a sponge bath with warm water and fresh clothes, we hurried back to the ape colony just in time for the mid-morning changing of guards and to bid farewell to the hunters setting out to find food for the day. Ellie and Alex were with the injured, many apes recovering enough to start walking around.

Caesar was out with Luca and Spear overseeing new scouting routes but Blue Eyes and Cornelius were at our new base, both happy to see me and full of many questions.

“I was helping Malcom with some humans.” I answered, swaying Cornelius back and forth while I held him by his ankles, the baby giggling. “I went for a ride and found them hiding nearby. I took them to Malcom and it was raining too hard to come back home so I stayed in your dad’s old room.”

“How… many humans… there… now?” Blue Eyes asked, shifting.

Apes… trusted was the wrong word but the tolerated Malcom, and they respected the knowledge Ellie had and made use of Alex’s desire to help no matter the task. But they did not care about other humans. I’d seen many signing to each other when they thought no one was around to see about how Koba had been right to hate the humans and they wished Caesar would allow them to hunt them down in the city.

Blue Eyes had every right to have the same view point. So a group of them gathered in one place, where they could strategize and plan, would make everyone uncomfortable. Especially knowing more humans, ones with weapons and an intent to kill us, would soon be here.

“About forty, but Malcom has made it clear the humans are leaving the city. Those who don’t agree with him are told to leave and are watched to ensure they do leave the city. We are okay. They will not be a problem.”

He did not believe me and giving him the time to sit around and think about it wasn’t a good idea, so I decided we should take a family day and head out like the old days to forage.

Taking Cornelius with us, extending the offer to Tinker for me to take Lily as well but she was sticking to her ways, to the way in which apes knew, and so the three of us set off near lunchtime. We headed to Golden Gate Park first, picking what wild fruit and berries we could find and fishing in the ponds.

Caesar found us while Blue Eyes was teaching Cornelius to hold a fishing spear, signing in slow movement that his brother must remain still as he urged Cornelius to once again step beside him. I heard Onyx approach, Oreo greeting the older stallion, and felt Caesar make his way toward me, wrapping his arms around my middle and pulling me into him and he rest his chin atop my head.

I thought the butterflies would go away once you had the one you loved, the uncertainty and the concealed admiration gone as you finally embraced them. I was wrong. They grew stronger, no longer caged by denial and now free to fly about.

They weren’t nervous butterflies, or cautious ones, they were lovesick fools who knew they didn’t need to hide their longing, or restrain my actions. But they were also tamer, no longer gripping to every touch we shared or meeting of the eyes. They knew I had it, could seek it out whenever I wanted.

And so now while I had craved every small chance to have him, I now craved to never be apart from him. I didn’t realize it at the time, so busy planning and running from my feelings, but to simply have him run to fingers up my back in warning he was about to wrap himself around me, it felt like I could breathe again.

I was starving, no longer fighting for the tiny scrapes of his attention, and I was now ravenous to devour all of him. But with the mounting war and my need to keep this monumental secret from him, my hunger would have to wait.

“How’s it going?”

I sighed into his hold, dropping my head back to rest against his shoulder and lifting my arms so my hands held his forearms crossed over my chest. “They’ve only had three arguments and it’s been about ten minutes with no fish, but I have faith in them. I mean our dinner does depend on them.”

Cornelius remained focused, a baby on a mission, but Blue Eyes turned his head to glare over his shoulder at me. “Mother is welcome to come teach him.”

I had tried my hand at fishing, once. After five minutes my impatience had won and, being a warm summers day, I had jumped right into the river and caught the fish by hand. This had greatly amused toddler Blue Eyes and Ash, while Caesar, Rocket and Koba had watched me with varying degrees of disappointment.

I felt Caesar jolt at our son’s signs, the title catching him off guard as he looked from our eldest to me. I didn’t say anything back, keeping my eyes on the boys as Blue Eyes guided the spear, following a fish.

My ape ducked his head, pressing a kiss to my cheek, and then another to my jaw, and a third to my neck all within quick succession. “Knew… you’d work… it out. Proud… of you.”

“You should be proud of him.” I murmured back.

We stood there for a while more, watching the two miss a couple times before finally Cornelius, with a lot of help from his brother, speared his first fish. Caesar and I rushed forward to congratulate them, Caesar raising his son high in the air as he praised the boy while Blue Eyes watched on with a smile, catching my wink.

We spent the afternoon in the park digging up bulbs, rummaging through bushes and fishing. Blue Eyes and I broke away for about an hour to hunt rabbits before we all gathered in the midafternoon sun to lie on a hill and watch the clouds. We formed one big cuddle pile, my head on Caesar’s stomach while Cornelius lay on my chest, Blue Eye’s using his father’s uninjured shoulder as a pillow.

“That one is a horse.” Blue Eyes signed, pointing to a cloud cluster. I didn’t see it.

“And that… a crab.” Caesar added, gesturing to a different shape in the sky.

I didn’t see it either. It was easy to forget human eyes could see variations in blue a lot better than a regular ape could, meaning I could distinguish between the lighter cloud and the sunset skies while the lines blurred for them. The only reason I had known this was because it was my favorite color, a teal sorta blue and Caesar always tried to draw me pictures of things and never got the shade right. It had always been a sore spot for him and a great triumph for me.

Cornelius raised his hands and I was sure he was about to add his own observations but instead signed something that had us stilling. “Is Koba going to take you three away from me again?”

It was a week ago that Koba had shot Caesar, Luca pulling me away from the burning colony as Blue Eyes joined the apes in storming the city. That night we’d each lost something, someone, but Cornelius had lost all three of us.

He had watched his father fall just as we all had, heard Koba declare a human with a gun had murdered the king. And then he was ripped from me, forced to watch as Luca dragged me away not knowing if I was being accused of the crime. And then his home burns down around him and he barely escapes with Tinker and Lily only to be unsheltered and freezing in a forest surrounded by guards as the females wait to hear if the attack was successful and who had died or if they needed to run because humans were now hunting him.

He was alone, cold, not knowing who had lived or who would raise him. And then in a great reunion we are all back together but his father is wounded, I am distant, he cannot return home and his people prepare for a war.

And nobody ever bothers to truly explain it all to the babies for fear of frightening them or them not understanding what was going on. But Cornelius was smart, smarter than his father.

He was also still just a baby. One who needed to be coddled and cared for, bundled close and guided with gentle words and steady hands.

Instantly Caesar and Blue Eyes rose, turning to the youngest member of our family. “Koba is… dead.” his brother started.

A lie.

“Nothing… will take us away… from you again.” his father continued.

A lie again.

We didn’t know who would survive this war, if any of us would. A bullet could take any one of us in an instant, a missile maybe merciful enough to end us all together so no one had to mourn.

And Koba was still very much alive and while he was not a threat today, the truth I alone carried lingered on the horizon like the ever-present fog on the bay, waiting for a turn of the wind to wrap around us.

The males glanced to me, waiting for my reassurance. But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t lie, not to those big hazel eyes looking up at me with so much trust. I couldn’t promise him everything was going to be okay and that Koba was well and truly just a name of our pasts.

“We should get back.” I spoke instead, standing. “It’ll be dark soon and we need to cook the fish.”

I felt Caesar’s eyes on me the rest of the night, not concerned but curious. He knew I would have usually never hesitated to consol our son, to wrap him in my arms and rock him as I swore to him that everything was going to be okay. He knew something was wrong.

And when he pulled me into his arms while we settled into the nest, holding onto me for a moment longer than normal with steady arms, I realized he wasn’t catching on to my secret dalliances like I had feared but he thought my breakdown yesterday about being responsible for the deaths meant I was struggling to see any way out of this.

I did see a way out, but it was with Koba by my side as we led a massacre.

And at day break, the three of us secure in Caesar’s arms as he snored, it finally came.

Rocket came bursting into the room with a roar of cries, rousing the entire colony as he charged his way between nests and skidded to a halt beside ours, all four of us sitting upright, sleep disappearing so fast it was as if it was never there.

“You’re going to meet Megatron!” Ratchet barked. “Do you know how insane this is! Optimus and I both agreed, as did your team, that we would not be using Megatron.”

“My team doesn’t get a vote. It’s not a democracy, they do as I tell them to. Optimus doesn’t like any plan that doesn’t involve a massacre and General Bryce doesn’t know our Megatron. He can be reasoned with.”

“Can we trust him with an army?” Optimus spoke, finally revealing himself to be right behind Kira.

She hadn’t bothered to so much as glance back in all the time they’d been following her, knowing what expressions they wore. And, she knew if she did she’d falter.

Of course she knew this was by far her worst idea. And worse still was the fact she’d told absolutely no one the real reason she had wanted to come to Omega Outpost One. But somewhere during the back and forth between her and Optimus that they’d so many times that the others could mouth along with their argument she realized that things never did change.

They were on a new planet, a new universe in a reality so different to their own, and they were still having the same old argument as though it was a regular Tuesday. They would argue, they would cool down, Optimus would activate his holoform and play that goddamn song that made Kira smile no matter how mad she was and he’d force her to dance with him and the fight would officially be over and things would go back to normal, only to start all over again tomorrow.

They were somewhere new, with new opportunities and new allies. So, why not try something new?

Besides, it’s not like her and Megatron didn’t get along. She shot him in the optic, he tried to kill her. There was some mutual respect in that. Over the years they’d tried to kill each other a couple more times, him succeeding only for hjer be revived with the very thing needed to bring back Optimus, Kira managing to watch as Optimus ripped his head off, but they always seemed to find time during a busy fight to comment on the other’s status.

She’d heard about his kidnapping in order to have his Decepticons released from prison, proving he could see reason in not outright attacking and getting himself killed. Perhaps the sweet deal of a Decepticon war ship and its crew would be enough to get him on their side.

And when his use had run out, she’d kill him.

“He more dangerous without one.”

And then Kira went on to list all the times she had met him in her life, starting with their first meeting and just as she was about to start on his revival into his Galvatron body, she felt the hairs on the back of her neck prickle. He was within this grove of trees with them, the three locked in his gaze as he no doubt aimed his cannon right at them.

Ratchet was mumbling about something, not seeming to notice Kira had stopped speaking and was now scanning the area as she tried to catch a glimpse of those gleaming red eyes.

“- thought you could be trusted and now you are leading us to our-”

“What did your idiot scientists do now, Prime?”

Ratchet’s ranting fell silent as Optimus pushed to place himself before Kira, standing between her and Megatron as he activated his sword and cannon, battle mask snapping across his faceplates.

There he was, with those cunning optics and snarl. He was less pointy than before in his new body, still gray and evil but more sleek and subtle in his bad guy attire. But those eyes, that glare, never changed. Neither did the bite in his voice, so accusatory even as he looked also bored, not bothering to unsheathe his sword.

Those sharp eyes moved quickly, scanning both Optimus and Ratchet. Kira knew him just enough to notice the doubt flicker across his faceplates, the realization that something was off here.

“We didn’t do anything.” she started, moving to step around Optimus and ignoring his growl as she started across the space between the two leaders, placing herself in the middle and stepping up onto a downed tree trunk so she stood a little taller. “The Primes were doing an experiment and it failed, transporting all Cybertronians on our Cybertron to this reality. It’s Earth, but a different dimension.”

Megatron took in her words with a slow blink, sharing his attention between the human and the Prime practically vibrating with readiness to charge forward and defend her should she need it.

She wouldn’t. Megatron had long since learned not to use Kira in a fight against Optimus unless he was looking for a particularly brutal fight.

“And on this dimension there are doppelgangers of most of us, ones who look like us but aren’t us.”

“So, this is the other Optimus?” Megatron asked slowly, now beginning to understand the situation and realizing that while the Optimus he knew was a wild card, who acted on violence first and didn’t bother to ask questions, this Optimus was someone he knew absolutely nothing about.

He took a step back, now no doubt wishing he had pulled his sword out.

“Yes. Our Optimus from our universe is back on our new base.”

This was, so far, going better than if her Optimus had come along, and there would have never been a way to get here without him forcing himself along if he had known the truth of her plan. This whole lying to get what you want thing was working out way better than she’d hoped. Kira had always liked the philosophy of asking for forgiveness rather than begging for permission.

“There’s also a Megatron on this world.” The warlord’s optics snapped down to the human, his calculating gaze at the Autobots turning to curiosity. “And he has a Nemesis full of Decepticons. You come with us and we’ll help you take him on. You do want an army again, right?”

The calculating gaze returned, the warlord frowning down at the human. For a while he said nothing and while the drawn out pause alarmed Optimus, him shifting just so behind her, Kira knew Megatron was thinking through his options.

Most humans had always made the assumption Megatron was just a war hungry melomaniac with a thirst for suffering who saw beauty in carnage and violence. And while it was true in some aspect and he did seem to have the same views as Optimus in that an all-out frontal assault to overwhelm the Autobots was better than a subtle, well planned attack, Megatron was far from single minded.

He had a serpent’s tongue but knew exactly how to get the masses rallied to his side, to see the wonder of the world he planned to build through tyranny. He was cruel, using his strength to scare the lower Decepticons into submission. He was smart, dedicating his time to sciences in the lulls between battles. He could outsmart, outtalk and overpower you at the same time.

Nothing was impulse, nothing an overreaction or done without a bigger play in mind. He’d had dozens of contingencies in play all at once back on Kira’s earth. His partnership with The Fallen, his work with Sentinel, his quest for the Cube. Optimus and the Autobots had one mission, survive. Megatron was playing a game of survive, humiliate Optimus, decimate the Autobots and rebuild Cybertron in his perfect image with the use of humans as slaves if necessary.

And so while his silence may have been an inconvenience and stretched on long enough that even Kira began to feel a little weary, she knew it was working out in her favor because it meant he was taking the time to think things through. Ergo, he was actually considering it.

“Why?”

Why get him back an army? Why give him something her team had worked for years to destroy?

“Better the enemy you know.”

Megatron hummed, the deep growl in his voice rattling the air around them.

Kira heard Ratchet transform, turning her head just enough to see he’d turned his servo into a scalpel.

 “Why do you really want me?”

You can’t out deceive the leader of the Decepticons.

If Kira revealed the truth he’d know they would never let him live once they had the Space Bridge. But he was never going to accept such a vague answer and she had known as much. It was still worth a try, even if all it did was prove to Optimus and Ratchet that they could have a somewhat civil conversation with Megatron and nobody got dismembered.

“We need the Space Bridge to return home and the Decepticons of this world have one. You take command, our scientists convert the Bridge into an interdimensional portal and we get to go home.”

Again, more silence. More considering. More waiting.

“And why would I go home to a world in which I have nothing after acquiring an army? Unless of course your plan is to use to me to fight Megatron instead of risking the Autobots and once you have the location of this Space Bridge you betray me.”

Kira had nothing to say back. That was exactly her plan.

Megatron began to chuckle slowly, the rumble like thunder getting louder as that familiar smirk graced his face plates. And there was that twinkle in his optics again, something fascinated yet telling you he knew exactly how exactly to turn the situation in his favor. “You would have made a wonderful Decepticon.”

Kira huffed a laugh, shrugging. That was the highest level of praise you could get from the old lunatic. “It’s never too late to try something new.”

If Kira didn’t know Megatron any better she’d say he looked at her with something akin to pride at her words. Unfortunately, she did know Megatron and that was not pride, it was fascination. The kind that went along the lines of ‘how can I use this object in my favor’. To be fair she was using him so mutually beneficial, just like this unplanned trip through the Ground Bridge had been.

“I’m sorry,” Ratchet started, earning Megatron’s attention while Kira turned to the medic, not at all concerned with having her back to him. Optimus kept his hard optics forward, weapons still trained on the warlord. “You’re agreeing to work with us? She just admitted to the plan to kill you and you’ll still come with us?”

“It’s Megatron.” Kira replied on the Decepticons behalf. “You really think he is going to pass up the opportunity to take command of an army again. He knows he’ll die but he’ll die as the ruler of an army.”

And that was the one thing Kira could always count on Megatron for, his fatal flaw if you will. There was no line he would not cross, no sliver of morality he would consider before making a decision, but he always needed something to follow him. He needed their fear, their submission, their admiration as he led them into a glorious battle for the salvation of Cybertron. He needed an army to command, and if it meant making a deal with his enemy and facing a foe who stood if not on equal prowess to him but even greater, he would it to once again feel power.

And that had been what Kira was counting on. She knew he would agree with her before she’d even stepped foot through that Bridge.

“You know me far too well, Little Bug.” Megatron praised, moving faster than Optimus expected and picking Kira up, setting her on his shoulder and waiting for her to point in the direction of where to go.

She did, eyeing Optimus and Ratchet as the warlord stepped past them and began along the trail to get back to the original Ground Bridge coordinates. “Well, we wouldn’t be very fun enemies if we didn’t know how to piss each other off.”

The walk back to the pickup point went a lot quicker than the sulking walk to Megatron, Kira giving the Decepticon a brief recount of all that had happened since their arrival on this alternate planet over a week prior.

As they broke through the tree line, the original Bridge location right ahead, Megatron froze.

There, arms crossed and a fury in his eyes, stood Kira Optimus.

“Oh shit.”

Two little words and the warlord knew. At least he had the decency to place Kira down before he began to laugh so hard he was doubled over, his guffaws echoing across the hills as he bent at the hips. He didn’t even care that he had two Optimus’ surrounding him, the irony of it all too much to ignore.

“You deceived Optimus.” she managed to make out, between his wheezing laughter. “You really would be the perfect Decepticon.”

They were here, scared, because of me.

Keeping my arrow notched I stepped into the alley and made my way towards them. “I can kill you now,” As expected the boys jumped, one reaching for a baseball bat and making his way to the front of the group. The leader, willing to die to protect those who stood behind him. I kept my eyes on him as I continued, “or you can come with me to Malcom and the rest of the survivors and help prepare to leave the city.”

Giving them a moment to get a read on my body language and realize I was not fucking around, I turned and headed back to Oero. Within five minutes the boys trailed out one after the other, their guards up but willing to follow.

Maybe there was hope for them after all.

Turning onto our old street was like stepped back in time, house after house showing illuminated windows as conversations drifting through the open doors. Children played in the street now that the rain had stopped, bundled in layers as they splashed in puddles while parents sat around fires burning on the sidewalks, blankets shared and stories told.

It wasn’t perfect, and the weary eyes and solemn faces told of the struggles faced as they tried to prepare and the grief they fought through, but it was spark of what humanity once was. What these people would always try to recreate.

“Imanuel?” A woman called, having been crossing the street from one house to another when she’d turned and seen us.

“Mama!” the boy with the bat called back, dropping the weapon as he rushed past us to meet her in a hug, both crying quietly as their held onto one another.

Hearing the commotion, Malcom and Ellie came rushing out Caesar’s house, both surprised to see me as I left the boys to be greeted by a few who stepped forward to embrace and reassure them, halting Oero at their side and dropping to the floor.

“You found survivors.” Malcom said, giving me a sideways glance. He didn’t have to say it for me to know what he was thinking, why were they still alive.

I shrugged. “Saw them on my way here. Decided to lend a hand. Would be easier than sending you or the apes out again in the morning to try find them.”

“Thank you.” Ellie reached over, giving my forearm a squeeze. When she felt the cold wetness of my jacket she pulled back with a wince. “Let’s get you warm and dry. You’ll freeze.”

“I’ll be fine. I need to get somewhere and Oero will-”

“I got him.” a voice called, and I turned to see Alex skipping down the steps of my old home, the only one not illuminated by firelight, holding a bundle of old towels. “I’m sure the kids would love to help dry him off.”

I looked over my mount, his eyes still so bright and trusting even after all I had put him through the last week. We really didn’t deserve horses. “Okay. They can give him some treats too, if there’s an apple or carrot to spare.”

Nodding to me with a kind smile, Alex slipped the reins from my hands and began to lead the horse towards the group of kids staring at the beast in wonder as he murmured reassurances of how he was a good horse.

“How’d he grow up so fast in the last few days?” I mumbled, letting Ellie and Malcom led me inside Caesar’s home.

Apparently it was no longer Caesar’s home but the central point of what was becoming a survivor’s village, various boxes of medical supplies salvaged and food stores scattered throughout the first floor. Following them upstairs, I was taken into Will’s bedroom and offered Caroline’s old clothes and told to dry and change in the bathroom while Malcom and Ellie spoke through the door.

“We have enough food to last a couple days but we’re having trouble deciding where to go. With more cars it’d be easier to move faster but there’s not enough gas to get us more than a three hour’s ride. And even then, we could only take fifteen max.”

“Where are you thinking to try go?” I grabbed one of Caroline’s brushes, running it through my wet hair as I rejoined them in the bedroom, Ellie silently holding out her hand for me to hand her my towel and turning so she should dry my hair better. The instincts of a mother bear don’t fade.

“Los Angeles turned into a warzone years ago. Militia fought for control for years, could very well still be at it. Maybe east.”

“You want to try the desert?”

Malcom frowned, sitting on the bed with his arms crossed as he looked at his boots. “No. But north is bears and blizzards, south is cannibals. Where else could we go?”

“Napa?” I tossed out. “It’s only about 50 miles, the valley would provide plenty in the summer and snow is rare. The apes used to take hunting trips in the warmer months to hunt elk. You and Caesar get along well enough, I’m sure you two wouldn’t mind the catch ups.”

If we ever made it out of this city and survived the war long enough to get back to our old traditions.

I’d done enough crying this morning, my eyes still red and puffy despite the long, cold ride. Caesar had held me as long as he could while I’d mourned but the colony needed their king and so Luca took over. He stood over me for hours as the rain fell and we watched the flames die and the ashes seep into the soil.

I hadn’t entered the building when Luca finally convinced me to return for dinner, mounting Oreo wordlessly and setting out into the darkening city. We’d ridden aimlessly for hours before I decided to head towards Caesar’s to check on Malcom and their progress in preparing to leave.

“That could work.” Ellie agreed with my suggestion, moving to stand before me and face Malcom, the first hint of anything more than pain and exhaustion in her eyes in days. In them shone hope.

If only Caesar could see such reason in fleeing. Instead he’d had apes throw empty barrels below the bridge, securing them in lines to appear like bombs. It was supposed to deter the humans from trying to sail beneath the bridge.

“We’ll think about it.”

Heading back downstairs, I was handed a bowl of squirrel and red bean chili which I forced myself to eat, knowing I’d need something to grant me some strength for what lay ahead of me. “You mind if I take an extra bowl?”

Ellie nodded with a kind smile, dishing up a second helping of the chili into a thermos and handing it over. “Going back to Caesar?”

No. “Yes. We had a hard day.”

“I heard.” Malcom spoke up, only the three of us at seated around the breakfast table. “We saw the smoke.”

Oh what memories this table held. Like that scratch near Ellie’s elbow from an incident with a meat tenderizer and a jelly donut. Or the red stains from an art project with too thin paper and too strong markers. And the crack near the far end from when Caesar became too heavy to jump onto the table and we didn’t know.

This city hadn’t been all bad, back when we’d still be Caesar and Allina in the windows. But those children were gone now.

“I should get going. It’s a long ride back.”

With the promise of being back soon and to take care of myself, I headed back into the chilly night air to find Oreo surrounded by children each waiting a turn to feed him slices from the apple Alex was cutting up.

“He’s a hit.” Alex announced as I got close.

But I wasn’t.

It wasn’t hard to put together that I was the human who had been the one to choose the apes. If my horse wasn’t clue enough, the fact that I wasn’t recognizable or sticking around was, and the glares from the surrounding adults sent my way told all I needed to know. It was time for this cowboy to leave town.

“We gotta go.” The collective ‘aww’s from the gathering of snot nosed mini humans pulled at my heart strings, those very same pleading eyes looking up at me many times before as little apes begged for five more minutes. “Finish feeding him.” I conceded.

Each child took a turn, Oero lapping up the attention like a golden retriever. Or maybe he didn’t care where the snacks came from as long as they kept coming. Either way, when the last child gave him one final nose pet and hurried back to her parents, he let out a frustrated snort and stomped his hoof.

“You had three apples and a bunch of grapes yesterday. You’re going to get fat.”

The indignant whinny I got back had Alex laughing, handing me the reins. “He deserves all the treats. Isn’t that right?”

The animal leaned into his pats as I moved to swing myself up onto his back, giving his shoulder a reassuring scratch. “Good boy, Oero.”

“Will you be back tomorrow?”

Not if I could help it. “Maybe. There’s lots to keep us busy with preparations. I’m sure you’ll be back to the warehouse soon.”

There were still plenty wounded who needed care. As it was there were already more bodies to burn at our next mass funeral. The losses were not yet over.

With a wave to Alex, I spurred Oreo on and we rushed down the streets, only his hooves echoing back at us as we traversed the eerie streets until we reached our destination.

The house would be unassuming to any who wandered by, another in the endless rows of abandoned homes at the end of the world, but that’s what was so dangerous about it. Nobody would know it concealed two monsters, gnawing at the chains keeping them contained.

Climbing the old, creaking steps, I shoved the door open and made my way towards the living room. He’d moved, barely a couple inches before the pain apparently became too much and he’d given up his attempts and lay there in misery.

He was asleep, or at least pretended to be as I moved around to restart the fire. Once it was roaring I dropped beside him, turning on my side so I faced him as I lay down, watching his chest rise and fall with the wheezing he made.

He turned his head slowly, those heavy eyes fluttering open as though doing so hurt. “Thought… you… left.”

He meant forever, the pause and panting between words painful to witness. And yet, I wanted him to be in pain, to feel a fraction of the ache that burned inside my chest, to know what it was like to feel like his soul was being ripped apart by the realization that he had caused the devastation of his people.

I lay beside him for a while, the two of us seven feet apart and watching one another, waiting for someone to say something. It was almost peaceful, if you forgot it all, the rain returning in a gentle patter and the fire cracking as it filled the room with it’s soft warmth.

I could, for just a moment, forget about our pasts and we were two friends enjoying a moment between the storms.

“We burned the dead today.” I chose to reply instead, not giving him the satisfaction or reassurance that I would always come back. “Fifty nine apes. There are more wounded who won’t make it. And once the human armies come, because the humans called for help, more will die.”

I saw it in his eyes, the clarity of what his actions had done. The hurt as he thought of all those lives lost because he’d led the charge too blinded by his own rage to see those around him falling. The sorrow at the idea of how much pain he had caused his people.

“Ash lived. He was lucky. Most weren’t.”

If Rocket knew I was nursing Koba back to health he’d kill us both. And I doubted Caesar or Luca would stop him.

I continued to watch as the truth ate away at him, those once so fiery eyes turned dull and shameful. He regretted what he’d done.

“I told you where the armory was.” I spoke, barely above a whisper but I saw his eyes jerk back to mine. “You only had the gun because you knew to look for one.”

He blinked once, twice, before beginning to shake his head. “Not… your… fault.”

Whether he was owning up to his own actions for not wanting me to feel the crushing despair he did, it didn’t matter. He could deny it all we wanted but we would never be able to know if he’d find that gun without me telling me there were plenty out there to search for.

It was sweet, him having enough care about me to take the blame I was carrying and place it back onto himself like everyone was telling me, but I did not believe him.

I deserved to be punished just as much as he did.

Getting up, I retrieved the thermos of warm chili and moved to sit behind him, lifting his head into my lap once again and feeding him small bites. He devoured the entire thing, his appetite returned. That was a good thing, a step in the right direction.

Belly full and sleep calling to him, I forced him to take the medicine and set about checking and redressing his wounds. None seemed infected. He really was too goddamn ugly to die.

I should have left. It was well past midnight and Caesar was probably staying up, hoping I would come crawling into the nest tonight emotionally drained but ready to move forward. I wasn’t. Instead, I grabbed a pillow from the sofa and set it beside Koba, once again just beyond his space and facing him, and he facing me. I didn’t sleep, or if I did it was brief, but I watched him as he did.

He was a monster and though he had not seen the horror he had caused he understood it, just like I now did. Neither of us deserved the love we had received from the colony, the respect or the admiration.

We should have died that night with the wolves, but fate kept pushing together to do the unthinkable in the hopes we were doing the right thing for those we cared about.

We were five flavors of fucked up, but we were fucked up together. And like how Caesar and I had found love, our beings molded together since the dawn of time, Koba and fit together like shattered glass, broken and jagged but welded together to create something stronger.

“I don’t think that’s right. Well, anyway, that’s a thrilling tale young bot, but what does this have to do with Megatron?” The General, obviously too scared of these rambunctious idiots that he did not try to re-steer the conversation back towards the issue at hand, had been letting the interruptions and distractions to constantly pull his focus away from the question at hand, could they use Megatron?

And since Kira’s Optimus seemed to be content to stand to the side, glaring at the screen in his holoform with his arms crossed as though daring Optimus and Ratchet to agree with the plan, it appeared no one was going to keep this meeting on track.

Kira had tried but even she had grown tired of them and had given up, relying on a mumbled one liner to keep herself sane.

The twins paused their wrestling long enough for Mudflap to stick his head out of the tangle of orange and green limbs just visible at the bottom of the camera’s view to say, “Nothing. I thought we were talking about Sentinel. You know Megatron betrayed Sentinel?”

“I thought you said Sentinel betrayed the Autobots to work for Megatron?” Ratchet spoke up, distantly remembering that bit of information was thrown into a conversation days ago.

He was trying very hard to ignore the fact that a Prime had betrayed the Autobots, and thus Kira. Thinking about it too long made the energon in his fuel lines boil.

“Not ‘for’, with.” Kira started, finally sitting up and once again facing the camera. “He and Megatron had been working together just before he and his crew left in the Ark. Once we rescued Sentinel from the moon, the plan with Megatron was back on. Instead of working with him, Sentinel took command of the Decepticons. Though that was largely due to Megatron being badly wounded after his fight with Optimus four years earlier.” The human took a deep breath in, mumbling on the exhale, “Didn’t stop him from saving Optimus’ aft.”

The words hit that Optimus like lightning, the scowl turning from threatening the camera to glare at his charge as his shoulders hunched. “What was that?”

“Oh nothing,” Kira cheerfully called, a stark contrast to her own scowl as she glared at the book before her she had been making the occasional doodle in when the conversations strayed and she was bored. “Just fondly remembering Chicago.”

Optimus sneered, uncrossing his arms and beginning to stalk his way toward the human woman. If Ratchet was in the room he would have immediately picked her up, the fury in those artificial eyes the same as the ones in saw in the villains of the movies Miko loved to watch. “Megatron was the bigger threat at the time?”

“Was he?” Kira challenged, pushing away from the desk and turning to face her Prime. For the first time Ratchet saw real anger on her face. “Sentinel was killing you, you had one arm by the way, and when Megatron shows up and shoots Sentinel in the back you leave Sentinel and charge Megatron, still one armed, and rip his head off before going back to kill Sentinel.”

“Of the two of them, Megatron was in better fighting shape. He was obviously the greater risk. Besides, he made a threat.”

“’Where would you be without me, Prime’? That’s not a threat, it’s a taunt at best. He was just showing off that he’d shot Sentinel.”

“He killed one Prime. He fully intended to kill two.”

“Only he didn’t kill Sentinel. You did, by shooting him in the face, twice!”

From the way none of the others seemed to be paying much attention to the argument, the background still the distance hum of multiple voices lost in their own conversations, Ratchet could only assume this was not the first time an argument like this had happened between the two.

“He tried to kill you!” Optimus threw back to the human, now standing right in front of her, the human having to crane her head back to continue to glare up at his pixilated face.

Who had? Sentinel, or Megatron?

Ratchet wasn’t at all surprised by the spark of rage that pulsed in his spark chamber. Some bot had tried to kill her? Of course they had, his own little base vermin had suffered at the hands of Decepticons and they had only been with the Autobots for about a year now. Kira had spent near two decades with her team, she was bound to face near death at the hands of the those monsters, yet here she stood. It did not make him worry any less.

“Every Decepticon and half the humans have tried to kill me. I don’t have a problem with how you killed Sentinel, or Megatron. I am pissed you didn’t call anyone else for back up.”

Whatever argument Optimus made back was drowned out by Agent Fowler and General Bryce moving to stand before the screens once again, their faces taking up the view. “What do you think, Prime? Should we try to reach out to Megatron and see if he’ll fight?”

Beside Ratchet, having not moved for hours as he’d stood with his arms crossed and watching the scene as though analyzing a battle map, Optimus finally took a step forward and spoke. “Kira seems convinced she may be able to persuade him to fight his doppelganger on our behalf. However, I do not see it making any sense to grant Megatron his own army of Decepticons.”

“Thank you.” General Bryce said, turning to his subordinate with a smug grin.

“However,” Optimus continued, “your plan has significantly more flaws. But, I do not see us being able to take on the Nemesis even with the help of the Knights and Dinobots. Getting someone on the inside may be our only choice.”

“And you think the guy who started this war and got your team stranded on my planet is the one to do that?”

Ratchet personally liked General Bryce’s plan. An all-out slaughter of the Decepticons wouldn’t feel too bad right about now. But he could see why such a plan would go against the morals of his Prime. He couldn’t say the same for the other Prime though, who was still very much engaged with Kira and judging by the slowly gathering group of Bots with smiles on their faceplates he was losing the argument.

Of course, the causal dig at the two Bots reminding them they were not on their own world and therefore were at the mercy of the General went unmentioned, even if Ratchet did see Optimus flinch. For so long they had been so careful to tread the waters between what was best for them and what the humans would approve. For once, Ratchet wanted to make a decision that was his alone. And it was that mindset alone that had him opening his intake ready to give an answer that would probably get him into a lot of trouble when Kira saved him by shoving her way into the front of the men.

“I can’t deal with him right now. Can I come stay with you, for just a few hours?”

“I am on my way. I will be there soon.” And true to his word, Optimus transformed right as he finished speaking, his engine revving hard as he made a sharp turn and all but gunned it out the base, leaving Ratchet to blink at the screen where General Bryce and Agent Fowler looked just as surprised.

“I guess this debrief is over.” Fowler muttered, though the relief on his face cancelled out any negative feelings his words may have conveyed.

And Ratchet felt the exact same way.

---

Twenty four minutes later, Optimus slowed before the gates of the secondary base expecting the guards to open up and let him drive over to where the hangers were. He did not expect Kira to be sitting on the sandy desert floor beneath the shade of the guard hut, engaged in casual conversation with the two human guards on duty and Ironhide in his holoform leaning against his alt mode.

She really was desperate to get away for a while.

Waving goodbye to the guards, and some words exchanged to Ironhide, Kira slipped a backpack onto her shoulder and slipped out of the opening gate, hauling herself into Optimus cab once he’d opened his door.

“Hey.” she greeted cheerfully, keeping her bag on her lap as she buckled in and waved a final time to Ironhide.

“Hello.” Optimus greeted, beginning to back away from the gate and started to turn to head back through Jasper. “Is everything…” Of course she was not alright, she had just gotten into a fight with Optimus. And no, things were not fine because she was stranded in another universe with a team that couldn’t get along and no clear plan on how to get home.

She had a team that were happier killing each other than bothering to listen to her, a government hounding her for answers yet whatever solutions she seemed to be trying to offer up were met with complaints or critics. Primus, Optimus had done the exact same thing.

“Are you okay?” Kira asked when the pause stretched on for too long, Optimus’ mind taking him on a tangent of thoughts that would probably only make her feel worse if he asked them aloud.

“Yes. Are you?”

Kira sighed, rocking her neck from side to side so it cracked. “Eh. I didn’t sleep much. Forgot how noisy those damn hanger doors can be. The slightest breeze and it sounds like the walls are coming down. The others seem settled though so that’s good.”

It was good, but that just meant their constant unruly behavior was the norm. Optimus would never have lasted a week with them, let alone twenty years on Earth. How had his doppelganger lasted an entire war? Then again, if one was to spend five minutes with him you’d see he hadn’t.

“Man, it’s so nice having you be able to pick me up and take me to Omega Outpost One. Usually I’d just walk for a couple hours.”

That didn’t make Optimus feel good. Glancing back, he saw the three hangers disappearing into his rearview. She really did have far too much on such small shoulders. And he didn’t mean that in the sense that he thought she was too small to handle it all, but that she should not have had to.

All because that Optimus could not keep his rage in control.

“He fights with you often.” Optimus spoke softly, rejoining the smooth tar road and heading for the town.

Kira smiled, something almost genuine as though the memories were fond, yet as she spoke her mask slipped and the truth revealed itself in tired eyes. “I start most of them. We have that argument about Chicago at least once a month. But between him being mad about working with the humans and the humans asking so many questions, I feel like I’m fighting more enemies than usual.”

Optimus understood that. Some days it felt like he was fighting on more fronts than just the Decepticons. Keeping order throughout his base, ensuring the humans weren’t annoying Ratchet, ensuring Ratchet wasn’t acting on his threats of violence against the humans, energon shortages, Megatron, still no way to return to his home planet.

Most days it felt better to just forget, to step away, to say he was taking a patrol and end up parked at an overlook for hours watching as the sun set and the stars he had once traversed arch across the sky, so far and yet the memories so near.

“Well, you are welcome anytime. You are an Autobot, and the base is yours too. I am sure Ratchet has missed your company, though he will never admit it.”

Kira smiled, genuine this time as she glanced to his rearview. “Just Ratchet?”

He’d walked himself right into that one. And his moment of hesitation was all the answer she needed, the human throwing her head back with a laugh. If he had to make a fool of himself to hear that sound again, he’d do it.

“Would you like to stop in town for anything?”

She hummed in thought for a moment. “There an ice cream joint the kids ever mention?”

An hour later Optimus pulled to a stop back in his own base, Ratchet greeting Kira far more kindly than he ever had a human, even kneeling as she started talking to him.

Softies, the both of them.

Watching as the human climbed the stairs, Ratchet moved to stand beside Optimus and sent him a private message on their comms system. ‘The base has already called three times asking when she’ll be back.’

‘She’ll be here as long as she wants to be.’

The unspoken part of his message, the meaning that he would do whatever and fight whoever he needed to so that she didn’t feel forced into anything she didn’t want to do was well received by his oldest friend as the medic nodded, watching as the human dropped her bag onto the floor and moved to the human work station.

They both jumped a moment later when the familiar swirl of atoms signaled as the Ground Bridge powered up.

Had she opened a bridge?

Ratchet whirled back toward the human. “What are you doing?”

She looked over to the two Bots, an unreadable expression on her face. Guilt?

“Prime sulks?” the Agent murmured in bewilderment, moving to lean against the desk she was working on and crossing his arms. He’d ditched the blazer and loosened his tie so it hung uselessly around his neck. Red eyes and coffee stains on his white shirt told the woman it had been a sleepless night for him.

“Hmm mmm. He’s mad I agreed to work with the humans.”

Their plan had been garbage. Shooting down the Nemesis and using the Ground Bridge to teleport exactly to the location of the crash site and killing off any Decepticons who remained was a terrible idea. Not only could that ship land anywhere on the planet and accidentally murder thousands if it crashed into a city, it could potentially destroy the Space Bridge they needed in order to get home.

And so Kira presented her counter offer, retrieving their Megatron and having him do the dirty work. His ego would absolutely want a portal to traverse multiverses, granting him the power to rule countless realities. All they had to do was get the Space Bridge working and then the humans could help out and destroy the ship in a controlled setting where the crash site was pre-determined.

She was yet to hear back from them. Apparently Agent Fowler was the chosen one sent to deliver the news.

A breeze blew in through the doors, rattling them on their hinges and carrying the voices of Chromia and Jolt in an argument about an illegal move. Ratchet was reprimanding someone, no doubt having been roped into being the paramedic for the game.

The government agent looked from Kira to the rig motionless in the hanger, then back to Kira. “Ah. Will he be ready to talk soon? Bryce would like to do a call with Team Prime and you all to make sure we’re all-”

He was cut off by Kira downing what remained of her water bottle and tossing the plastic container over her shoulder. It landed squarely on the grouchy Prime’s cab with an audible thunk, the metal it had just landed on jumping to life.

Optimus’ transformation was quick and rigid, a sure sign he was mad. But instead of voicing his feelings, or even gracing either human with so much as a glare, he stormed out of the hanger, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker leaping out of his way where they had been walking past.

Judging by the whispering that had been going on, his abrupt departure likely interrupted a prank planning session, so it was probably for the best overall.

Jazz snickered at the scene, shaking his helm slowly as he greased his weapon.  

“He acts like a child.” Fowler spoke plainly, uncrossing his arms and hoisting himself up to sit on the desk.

Kira’s eyes skimmed the final touches she had made to the report, hitting submit. Twelve down, she didn’t even know how many remained. “He carries a lot. He should be allowed to have a bad decade.”

Fowler hummed at that, and then a silence settled over them. A heavy silence, long enough that Kira glanced over to the Agent and found him looking at her. “How do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“You said a ‘bad decade’. They are going to live a lot longer than you. My guys have already had three liaisons since arriving here in the seventeens. You know you’re going to grow old and die and it’s going to only be a blink of the eye for them.”

From the corner of her eye she saw Jazz jolt, freezing with his servo raised.

Of course that was the reality they faced, the reminder of her short life a constant in the backs of their minds no matter how hard they tried to ignore it. Kira was going to die and it would be long before any of them had even aged what would be considered a year.

Spending time with her was like if a human decided to keep a pet moth. It lasted a day and while plenty of memories could be made, the creature so fragile yet so full of life, it was still only a day.

She knew that no matter how much she loved them, how much she would always choose them and try to live like them, she would die and they would move on and continue to go on with their existence, with the war, and her life would have meant nothing in the end.

If any of them heard her say that they’d immediately challenge her. It was her early warning that had ensured they’d managed to get out of DC before the city had gone into lockdown in an attempt to contain them. It was her sacrifice that had brought Optimus back. It was her knowledge of humans and their minds that had kept them safe while on the run.

But at the end of their day, she would die and they would go on like nothing had happened with nothing but the memory of her.

And she was okay with that. Yes, they would mourn, but she wasn’t about to give up the life she had for something that was inevitable. If she was to die, she would make sure her life had been a great one, one where she didn’t waste opportunities or live with regrets.

“You don’t enjoy a sunset because it lasts forever.”

And who knew, maybe the nerds would find a way to extend her life.

The agent scoffed at her, the philosophical answer apparently ridiculous to him. “Your sunset is a nuke.”

Kira shrugged, Jazz resuming his work and Kira having never paused in hers.

A shadow fell over the door before the agent could say more, Scorn sticking his head into the hanger and sniffing. The metal Spinosaurus gave a low rumble in acknowledgement of the beings seated inside, shaking his head as he continued to amble around the base, the ground shaking as his tons of solid weight paraded elsewhere.

“How are you used to this?”

“I’ve lived with them since I was eighteen.” Kira replied, glancing up again to see the male watching the Dinobot go with wide eyes, not an ounce of wonder but a heaping bought of fear in his expression. “They’ll only fight if you give them a reason to.”

“I didn’t give Prime a reason to last time.” the agent fired back, reminding Kira of the incident days before. The constant itch of her cheek healing did that too, the wound especially uncomfortable when she tried to sleep.

“No but I technically did by not warning them you were coming. And I saved your ass, stop complaining.”

Outside, the helicopter was back to do its slow round. After a simple explanation that they were patrolling to ensure no wayward humans happened upon the base and not that they were ensuring the Bots didn’t leave, the Bots had significantly relaxed.

Enough that they were now deep into an argument into the ethics of three baby dinobots and Wheelie being used as substitute Cube balls. Ratchet had confiscated the real one. Alarmingly, the votes to use the minicon seems to be stacking up.

Considering he was passed out snoring in a cat bed next to her desk, she had no doubt the debate was coming her way soon.

“What’s the verdict on using Megatron.”

“The President wants to know if we’ve done an eval to rule out you being a psychopath-”

“You got to get on their level to play their game.”

“, but he sees reason in your plan. You’ll have to convince Team Prime though.”

Somehow that just made things a whole lot harder. Bargaining with Megatron she could do. Manipulating him, it wasn’t exceptionally difficult. Convincing them to team up with Megatron? Maybe they should just blow up the Nemesis and call it a day. One grumpy Optimus she could ignore, two? And the other seemed so outspoken in his views.

She remembered when her Optimus was like that, at least in the early days when he still had some hope. Now if given half the chance he’d kill all the humans, the Decepticons and fight the Primes themselves if he had to to get back home.

“I’ll try get to their base and talk to them in person tomorrow.”

The agent sat quietly for a moment, both humans lost in thought as Kira continued to type away. “You said there were three dots that could indicate your Decepticons. Do you remember where they were?”

“Yes.”

“And do you know which one is Megatron?”

Kira finally looked away from her screen, stretching her arms above her and rolling her neck side to side. “No, but unless your World War 2 went differently each of the countries they’re in are US allies. You could fly a drone over and we’d be able to identify who is who.”

Kira watched, waited, as the agent had a conversation with himself, agreeing and disagreeing with her plan over and over until he sighed deeply, his exhaustion making the final decision. It would be a waste of resources trying all three and an unnecessary risk. Cornered Decepticons were suicidal Decepticons. “And what do we do with the two who aren’t Megatron?”

Barricade and Beserker? They wouldn’t be useful even if they were to join forces with their leader to take on the Decepticons army of this world. “Kill ‘em.”

“How? If we send a drone over and they spot it, they’ll shoot it down and we’ll be-”

“Send small drones, ones they won’t see. Once we have a confirmation, send a C-130 and fire everything you have at the tin cans. They’re not impossible to kill. Their armor melts eventually.”

The agent paused, his eyes jumping between her own as he tried to get a gauge on her. Sure, it was a simple and primitive plan, but that’s how things worked on her world. You shoot until there isn’t anything to shoot anymore.

This world, the Bots Fowler was used to working with, had few numbers and apparently did not see the use in human allies. They were used to making what little numbers and resources they had count, not unleashing the full fury of a dozen Autobots who competed over who could make the biggest boom.

Fowler drummed his fingers against the desk beneath him, his tongue pressing against his cheek. “Lemme talk to Bryce.”

Another aspect of the military Kira never missed, having to sit around for hours waiting for someone else to green light a mission they would never participate in as they sat in a leather chair on an entirely different continent.

With a stiff nod, Kira watched as he made his way out the hanger, hardly flinching as Slug wandered by him. There was hope for him yet.

“You really think this is a good idea? They seem too… sheltered.” Jazz still worked on his gun, but his attention had been on the two of them the entire time.

Kira shrugged, returning back to her screen. “We don’t any other choice. Not unless you can transform into a spaceship.”

 Whatever remark Jazz would have made was cut off by a roar of noise as an army of Autobots came spilling into the hanger. Apparently the council had voted on Wheelie’s fate.

Well, there went our peaceful morning. It had been a good five minutes while it’d lasted.

“I love you too.” I deadpanned, no real venom in the glare I shot my mate, snorting at the sheepish smile he tried to use. If Rocket ever saw that look…

“Hungry, Mama.” Cornelius said again, almost buzzing with the energy he’d managed to restore during his night of rest.

“Ask your daddy for breakfast.”

Cornelius moved fast, crawling onto his father’s stomach where Caesar had moved to lie on his back and staring down at the chimp with wide, expectant eyes.

“What do you want for breakfast?” Caesar signed. While he was thrilled Cornelius was speaking more, and spoke to me daily, he was still making sure our son mastered sign.

“Berries, from Alina’s bush.”

He meant raspberries, the grove of them I’d often take he and Lily to in the afternoons. But those were back in the forest, the forest we no longer lived in. The forest we might not ever go back to.

Undeterred, or even showing a hint of the sting of his son’s words, Caesar went on to ask questions that required Cornelius to sign more about the area he was describing, what colors the bushes were and what the leaves looked like.

“Hungry too.” A voice called behind me.

I turned my body, intending to roll over to face him when my hips moved and a stiffness zipped up my spine, a grunt leaving me. Memories of last night came rushing back in a blissful blur, reminding me I had no idea how the hell I even got back to the nest or dressed. The last thing I remembered was falling asleep atop Caesar.

“Alina?” Caesar called, worry clear in his voice as he reached out and rested his hand upon my lower back.

“I’m good.” If I turned back around, looked him in the eyes, then more memories of him beneath me with those hooded, ravenous eyes spurring me on, would leave me a blushing mess. That wasn’t exactly something I wanted to be while in a cuddle pile or having to leave and face other apes.

Blue Eyes, thankfully, was almost as hard to wake as I was and so he was still blearily shifting from dreamland to reality and missed what had happened.

Our slow morning eventually had to kick up into a higher gear and so we moved from the nest toward the rest of the colony. Caesar invited Luca and Maurice to eat with us, but the morning lacked its usual jokes or familiar tales. And it had nothing to do with maintaining status or respect.

Beyond our small circle apes sat lifeless in small groups, what little food we could find pushed around listlessly. The two days since the battle had been rough but this was different, heavier. The air carried a sense of dread. And when we’d finished eating the colony began to move as one, many dragging their feet as they began to walk out the building.

I caught Maurice’s shoulder as he started to follow. “What’s going on?”

The orangutang turned to me, a heaviness in his eyes I hadn’t seen before. “We are burning the dead.”

---

The universe is a bitch. For weeks we have uncharacteristic sunshine and the one day we plan to honor our dead, the fog and dark clouds roll in.

It was fitting, gloomy weather for a terrible event, but a little warmth would have comforted the trembling, mourning colony somewhat. Instead, we stood shivering as the final preparations were made to the pyres that had been built at the edge of Golden Gate Park, those lost deserving to at least be laid to rest beneath trees instead of buildings.

Four bundles of wood were set up, the ones we’d lost placed side by side. Families stood by their loved ones, saying final goodbyes or grooming one last time. Some females cried, supported by one another in their grief as they laid their sons, their mates, their fathers, to rest.

Caesar and I stood apart from those gathered who were not tending to their lost, our sons at our side. And when the time came, each ape turned to us as Caesar stepped forward and began to sign.

He spoke of the sacrifices made, that the bravery of those who gave their lives for the colony would never be forgotten. That we would honor their memories.

I looked out over the crowd, my eyes roaming across the mournful faces, but my mind wandered. None of these lives lost were for the colony, as Caesar was putting it. None of them would have come to this godforsaken city if it hadn’t been for Koba. He led them in the charge, a senseless battle that killed so many. Their deaths were nothing but the consequences of his fear.

Ash stood in the crowd, supported by his mother and father as he bid farewell to friends he had lost. He could have one of the bodies we burned today. Ash, Blue Eyes, Caesar. I could have been as broken as the apes in the crowd. I almost was.

“Apes together strong.” Caesar signed, the rest of us repeating it back to him. With a nod, he motioned for the chosen apes to step forward with the torches.

I watched as the fires were moved towards the base of each pile of wood, the branches catching alight faster than I imagined. In moments each pyre was alight, fire jumping from one body to the next as they ate away at the flesh, reducing lifeless bodies to nothing but ashes and memories.

All around us apes mourned, whimpers and cries floating across the crowd. All this loss, this death, and Koba wasn’t here to see the devastation he had caused.

Koba had done this. He was responsible for every life lost, every child who was to be raised without a father, every mother mourning a son. Human, ape, he had killed hundreds starting this war. And he would never get to see the bodies burn.

All of this caused by a single shot from one gun. A gun he’d only know about because he had to be so damn angry enough to go looking for the armory.

The armory I had told him about.

The realization hit me so hard I stumbled back with a gasp, my ears ringing with the screams of apes. Koba only knew about the armory because I had told him what that word meant. He only had the gun because I had told him there was a place where he could find more.

I had done this.

The world tilted, my eyes locking onto each ape that burned, every face twisted in pain in their final moments. My chest seized, the air knocked from my lungs and no matter now hard I tried to breathe in nothing would move.

I heard Caesar call out to me, a hand on my shoulder steadying me as I swayed. Tears blurred the dead, the few apes able to see through their own grief turning to me with unsure looks as I crumbled before them.  

And then they screamed as bullets ripped through them, each lifeless face with dull eyes turning to me to blame.

I had started this war.

I ran, though with my panic and my lightheadedness it was more of a drunken stumble. I had to get away, from them, from me, from the truth. From all of it. I needed to move.

I didn’t make it far before Caesar caught me, scooping me up in his arms and rushing us to shelter behind a grove of trees, lowering me so I rested against a trunk of a red wood as he knelt before me. “Alina? Alina, what wrong?”

My eyes darted around him, catching the healing wound on his shoulder. Koba shot him because he knew where to find a gun, a gun I had told him about. It was my fault he’d been shot.

I’d almost killed Caesar.

“My fault.” I gasped.

Caesar shook his head, looking back to see if anyone had followed us. He didn’t know what to do, my eyes wide as I blabbered incoherently between pained gasping that did nothing to grant me air. “What?”

“My fault. I told Koba about the armory. He knew about the gun because of me.”

“No.” Caesar said firmly, his own understanding of my words putting him on the same thought path as me. He reached out, hands rough and cold as they cupped my face, angling it so I was looking directly at him. I could feel his fingers trembling

“He shot you.”

“No.” he disagreed again, knowing where I was going, where my shift of the blame was taking me.

“My fault.”

“Not you.” he tried again, his voice hard with emotion. It sounded like trying to say those words almost choked him. Because he’d thought the very same thing before shoving those words away, hating himself or ever blaming me. Or maybe he hated the realization that I hated myself.

Koba got the gun because I had told him there was somewhere he could look for a gun, and then he had shot Caesar and burned our home to the ground. He had led the apes to war, dozens slaughtered in the belief their king had been shot by the very gun I may as well of handed Koba.

All of this was my fault. Every death, every injury, the war to come. Every ape who had died, and every ape that would die from this day on, was because of me.

“My fault.”

Caesar grunted as though he was in pain, pulling me into him and resting his chin atop my head, rocking me back and forth. He held me tight, like if he held on hard enough, if he was strong enough, he could protect me from what was going on inside my mind. “No.”

“My… my fault.”

I clung to Caesar, my only tether to sanity as days of loss and fear and guilt ripped through me. And I cried, and I screamed, and I hated every atom that made up my being.

And Caesar stayed, holding me together and repeating over and over again how what had happened was not my fault, that he did not blame me, that Koba would have done what he’d done no matter how he’d come upon that armory.

His words did nothing to soothe the blackness that ate away at me, the coldness that seeped into my soul and took hold of my body.

The colony mourned that day, they burned their loved ones lost and tried to find comfort in one another, find a way to move forward. For me, this was the start of a spiral that would forever haunt me. Their ghosts, the memory of their bodies laid awaiting the flames, would forever be seared in my mind.

I was responsible for the fall of our colony. I had doomed us all.

The camera jolted, the device the call had been answered on swinging around to reveal the other world’s Optimus as he seemed to be watching whatever was going down, deeply disappointed.

“How are things going?” Optimus dared ask, already knowing what the answer would be.

“More space to move around, more opportunities to cause mayhem.”

The mistakable boom of an explosion sounded in the background, Optimus swinging around to face out the hanger and toward the commotion. “Hound! What is the matter with you?”

Whatever the medic turned weapons enthusiast said back was not loud enough for the speakers to pick up on, but Optimus’ sigh and the way he moved to pinch the bridge of his sensory valve were. “I should have let Megatron kill you all.” he muttered.

“Heard that!” Kira barked from somewhere beyond the frame, and then she was yelling again at someone called ‘Sharp-T’, though neither mech knew who that was.

“How is she?” Ratchet asked.

While Optimus had been silent in his worry for the human who left with those Autobots, Ratchet had not. The medic had paced, constantly muttering about how it was unsafe and how he should have grabbed the femme when he’d had the chance.

“They gave her energon!” he’d snapped when Bulkhead had complained. “They stood there enabling her trying to kill herself! Did you see what it did to her? She needs rest and care.”

She hadn’t looked so weak and frail and in need of anyone caring for her when she’d sat atop the Dinobot, beaming like she’d just found a stash of energon gummies. And it certainly didn’t look like she was in any sort of danger when said Dinobot was glaring at everyone, his message clear. Look at her the wrong way and you died.

Optimus had no doubt she was safe so long as she was near any one of those beings she now shared a base with, but humans were smart and manipulative. They would find a way to get her away from them.

“She has made a full recovery.” Optimus started, the brief moment of his reassurance of her well-being cancelled out when she yelped out an “Ow!” immediately after he finished speaking.

The Prime barely glanced in the direction of the shout, seeming to be walking to a quieter corner within the hanger. “She is enjoying having the Dinobots back. She thinks of them as pets.”

Ratchet scoffed. He had just about passed out seeing Grimlock step through the Ground Bridge. Optimus had been convinced the old medic was about to blow a gasket when he’d seen her perched atop his head like she was meant to be there.

“And the humans?” Optimus asked, keeping his voice soft.

The Prime had seemed to have reached his intended destination, the ruckus of the others now a dull drone in the background. “They have asked to speak to her at her ‘earliest convenience’. My team knows to keep at least two of them on her at all times. They will keep her busy with their… distractions.”

That was a start, ensuring she was never alone and had plenty of excuses not to bend to the will of the organics. But Optimus still couldn’t let go of the feeling that she would be so much safer within the silo, rock walls separating her from them.

And his face must’ve shown as much because the Optimus in the screen sighed, looking away briefly. He was beginning to think so too. “They have begun patrolling the fence and have a helicopter circle nearly every cycle. It could be they are now cautious with the Dinobots around but she knows something they want.”

“We received the schematics you sent.” Ratchet started, pulling up the aforementioned data file on his work station screen. “I’ve begun reading through it and gathering the parts I’ll need.”

Holoforms were coming to Optimus’ team after all. Should they need to hide Kira somewhere far away, they certainly would not be sending her alone. Bumblebee would the best fit but in order to truly blend in, he’d need to be human. Or as close to it as they could come up with.

The Prime nodded, flinching when something nearby shattered and there was a cacophony of “Wheeljack!”

Pedsteps approached and Optimus turned to time to see Ironhide deposit Kira onto his shoulder, the lieutenant nodding at the screen in silent acknowledgment before rolling his shoulders and beginning to bark orders at the others to take their mischief making elsewhere. Namely, away from the human.

Every bot was in on the plan, and every bot knew that no matter what, Kira could never know.

“Hey. Sorry about that, Grimlock likes to chew on metal things. And Sharp-T has gotten bolder with her fire.”

Optimus and Ratchet still had no idea who that was, or sure they could entirely trust the metal-loving dinosaur to not get distracted if he was supposed to be watching her, but the shine in her eyes and the glow of her smile made it hard to keep the mood heavy.

Optimus had seen her fear when she’d first arrived, seen her relief at finding her team, witnessed her sorrow at the realization of what her actions may have done, and now he got to see pure, unbridled joy as she was exactly where she wanted to be.

“It appears everyone is settling in well then.” Optimus spoke, his spark thrumming with the wider grin he was graced with.

“Yeah, it’s great. A little weird that it’s not Cybertron beneath our feet but it’s still like home. Almost. You should stop by. I bet Ratchet misses the noise.”

The grumbled curses the medic beside him muttered had the femme throwing her head back with a laugh so fierce Optimus had to reach up with his free servo to steady her.

“Oh, don’t lie. You miss us.”

“Like a plague ship misses a scraplet.”

“What’s a scraplet?”

Ratchet chuckled, partly humorless as the memory of that happened the last time a scraplet infestation rocked the base and a but warmly, the genuine question and little head tilt the human did so innocent. “Little one, you don’t want to know.”

Kira shrugged, shifting on her Optimus’ shoulder to press closer into his neck cables. “If you say so.”

She did seem better, more color in her face since yesterday and a brightness in his eyes Optimus hadn’t realized was so drastically dimmed until now.

Would she be so happy when she found out she was in danger? Would she understand?

Maybe they could make this a little better, easy her into the idea, phrase it like a little getaway from all the chaos.

Optimus opened his mouth, ready to prose the question, when pedsteps thundered over and a worried Evac appeared in the corner of the screen. “Optimus, the humans are entering the base.”

---

This was not how Kira was expecting her day to go.

Firstly, the humans reached out asking to meet with her about something to do with the relics and then suddenly everyone on base needs something from her. Watch Sunstreaker try a new flip, help Drift with a haiku, stop Grimlock from eating the warehouse bulkheads, design new holograms for the femmes, umpire a game of thumb war between Skids and Mudflap, help Roadspin name clouds. If she didn’t know any better she’d think they were trying to keep her distracted.

Which begged the question, what the hell did they do that they were trying to cover up? The last time they’d acted this needy was when her one and only pillow had met an unfortunate demise and they were trying to get a new one before she went to bed.

Now the military, having understandably gotten tired of waiting since it had been well over twenty-four since their message, were rolling in and Optimus was trying to shove her into his chest cavity.

“What the hell are you?” she snapped, wriggling around for all her worth.

She hung out in there frequently, when she needed a nap and Optimus wasn’t in the mood to convert into his alt mode, or if she got caught up in a battle and needed somewhere sheltered to hide. That was one wild roller coaster. Now it was being turned into a time out contraption.

“Stop squirming.” Optimus growled, trying to gently maneuver her, but large digits and agile limbs don’t make a good mix.

“No. Why?”

It was just a meeting. Talking, something that needed to happen way more often around here. Why was he acting so weird? Why were they all being so weird?

Finally able to get a solid push off from his palm, Kira deftly swung herself down and descended his body with all the grace and skill seventeen years of avoiding a babysitter had granted her, landing on the floor with a sound grunt and booking it toward the doors.

Evac had rolled the hanger doors shut on his way out, but none of them were small enough or smart enough to check the human sized door. Throwing it open, Kira sprinted across the desert space towards the gathering that was gearing up to start a new war.

The Bots stood ready, weapons out and aimed at the four humans standing beside their Humvee, arms held up in surrender and while they should have been terrified, they stood calm and open.

General Bryce stood in the front of the group, Fowler close behind him and two humans Kira had not met before. They hardly flinched as Grimlock roared, Slug his huge, crowned head back and forth in a threatening display.

“Woah, woah, what is going on?” Kira slipped between peds, twisting and turning to avoid outstretched servos trying to grab her. Even Strife tried to grab the back of her jacket with one of his heads.

The only ones not out with weapons brandished were the Knights, but they were yet to leave the hanger for more than just a moment to throw a question her way. They certainly wouldn’t emerge for this, even with all the yelling going on.  

“While I understand the apprehension,” the General started, Kira managing to get away from Ironhide leading the and firmly placing herself between her team and the humans, “I don’t believe this is necessary.” General Bryce spoke simply, not raising his voice like most people did the first time they met the bots, assuming the height difference equated a hearing deficit.

Kira remembered the first time something like this happened, back in New York after Optimus had been killed. The military had arrived, armored vehicles and soldiers aiming everything they had at the Bots, the gathered team instantly moving to defend themselves.

Epps and Lennox had gotten the situation under control only because Ironhide had reminded everyone that Optimus would not have wanted the Autobots to attack the humans when all it was was fear making them lash out. 

But this time it fear causing the Autobots to go on the defensive, the memories of what happened the last time humans decided they wanted to control the Cybertronians causing them to go immediately to ‘fight our way out’. Only there was no reason to fight this time.

“Guys, stand down!”

A roar echoed across the base, followed by the hanger doors being ripped from their hinges as they were thrown open, Optimus having taken a running charge to burst his way through them. Why the hell had they tried to lock him and her in there?

“What is going on!” Kira shouted, the Bots shifting to allow Optimus to make his way to the front of the assault circle, the Prime pumping his cannon and aiming right at the General. Even though she was feet from him Optimus would fire, his aim near perfect.

“Kira, it’s time to go.” he spoke, her knowing him long enough to know that was his commanding voice. She had long since stopped finding authority in it.

“No, you all need to stand down.”

“It is not safe-”

“Stand down!” she barked, furrowing her brows as she glared up at the titans. “That is an order.”

Optimus might not have been able to command her anymore, but she still some authority over the others. And the glances between her and Optimus as the Bots decided who they were going to obey told her as much.

Yes, the humans should have seen this as a problem, but they weren’t doing anything wrong. This was still their base. A warning that they were coming would have still been helpful, if only to avoid this exact situation.

“They are here to discuss the relics.” Kira spoke clearly, “They want to start planning which we’ll need their help to extract. We’re not about to go and destroy the pyramids again.”

That did nothing to calm them. Why were they so defensive? Besides the trauma of before, these guys hadn’t done anything to cause such fear to ripple through her team. This was all so ridiculous.

“Kira, come here.” Optimus tried again, a hint of pleading making its way in. He was scared.

Of what?

“Optimus, it’s-”

“I know my kind have done you all so very wrong in the past back on your world and for that, I am truly sorry.” General Bryce started. He tried to take a step closer but the shifting of weapons had him pausing where he was, still content to keep his arms raised in surrender. “You are heroes, who sacrificed so much for our planet and encountered unimaginable losses and what was done to you was a great injustice. Your efforts and success at minimizing the terror the Decepticons unleashed should have been acknowledged, not blamed. I know the uniform I carry brings painful memories, but I chose to wear it to remind myself that I am fighting for the freedom of my planet, my family, and my home. And I hope, soldier to solider, we can find some common ground.”

That sounded genuine, an honest plea that he truly did mean no harm to them. That he, although it might’ve been against the judgement of all those around him, did not see fault in her team. And his words had the effect he intended, Kira’s team shifting on their peds and they looked to one another once again, gauging the reaction of the others to see whether they were going to believe him.

“Kira,” Optimus whispered, not bothering to hide his desperation anymore. He was begging her to step away from the humans and get closer to him. But this was more than their weariness of humans after all their experiences. This was more than a distrust, or a hatred. This was terror.

He was so sure that something was going to happen to her, and that the humans, this human, would be the one to do it.

“What are you scared of?” Kira asked, in Universal so they knew the humans would not understand.

Optimus didn’t seem surprised. He knew she knew him well enough to know he was hiding something from her. “They want the information about the gun.”

Was that all? All this fear and weapons out for something as small as thinking she was about to be tortured for information about a couple bullets.

Yes Kira understood entirely why those bullets were important and what she would have done for information like that if it had meant keeping the Autobots safe, but as much as Kira hated humans she was still one of them and she knew them.

Fowler had been pissed she’d broken the gun, and he obviously wanted it, but one look at his eyes and he knew why she’d done it and respected that decision. And that was the end of it. But apparently the message hadn’t been so clear with her Cybertronian companions.

Kira turned to the humans, addressing the General loud enough for all to hear. “The gun, the one I destroyed. You want to know what it’s laced with, right?”

General Bryce blinked, genuine shock painting his face. “No.” Kira raised her brow. “I mean yes, but I understand why you destroyed it and honestly, I do not think we need it.”

Kira opened her mouth, ready to press about him torturing her to get it if necessary when his response had her thoughts careening in a different direction. “How come?”

There was the thunder of pedsteps as this world’s Optimus came storming out the hanger, rushing over to join the Bots still armed and ready. The only explanation would be that he Ground Bridged, but why he have come here?

Kira really needed to have a talk with everyone to figure out just what they thought was going on because the Autobots were apparently preparing for a war no one had even thought about waging.

I turned away from him again, staring back at the dark, silent city. If I didn’t know for a fact humans still hid out there I would have almost considered it peaceful. But it was too quiet. The forest had noise always, the rain dripping, birds by day and crickets by night. Here, beneath the towering buildings, it was silent.

I watched Caesar through the reflection as he moved slowly to stand behind me, wrapping his arms around my middle and dropping his head into my neck and inhaling deeply. “I… am sorry. Should have… warned you. Told you… before we… mated.”

I grunted in response, melting into him as I rested my head back against his shoulder. I hadn’t come in here truly mad, and I was not looking to start a fight, but he needed to see that what was obvious to him wasn’t obvious to me. I could spend the rest of my life with the apes and still know so little about their ways.

I could talk like them, walk like them, learn their grunts and growls, but I would never be one. My brain was too human, the human thoughts and human ways of handling things different than their own. Caesar had been like me but he’d learned and could understand them on a biological level. I would forever be playing catch up but no matter how hard I worked, I’d never reach their level.

“I sorted it out. Luca, Rocket, Maurice and I came to an understanding. Tinker and the other females too, I think. Blue Eyes…”

How would Caesar react to what we’d said? He had prompted Cornelius to call me mother but he had never forced Blue Eyes to form that kind of a relationship with me. How would he feel about it?

Caesar, mistaking my silence for things not going well, said, “Will… figure it out. You always do.”

I hummed again as he began to sway us. And then I jolted with a gasp when his tongue darted out to lick my neck before kissing a trail from below my ear down to my pulse point.

“May I… apologize?” he asked, his voice somehow getting deeper and gruffer as one hand left his hold around my stomach to settle on my hip, his thumb drawing small circles there.

Of course one night of sex would not be the last, not by a long shot, but I had been so focused on everything else I hadn’t even considered doing it again. Besides that, I was used to craving his touch and not being able to satisfy that need.

But now, I was married to the King of the apes. And he wanted me.

Feeling me tense, Caesar lifted his head just so to catch my eyes in the reflection, a silent question.

Those eyes, those brilliant hazel eyes that I could see a million thoughts in that looked at me with so much love, watched me. And I was reminded I wasn’t alone in my desire anymore.

“I spent so long wanting you in ways I couldn’t have.”

He watched me, taking apart my words. “What ways… do you want me?”

I swallowed, the room suddenly a lot warmer and it had everything to do with his furry mass pressing against me, holding me up as a pillar of strength while my knees began to shake. “To kiss you and hold you. To taste you.” He inhaled, the fur along his shoulders bristling. “To feel you inside.”

His chest rumbled, something between a growl and groan as he moved to kiss my neck again, nipping at my exposed skin before soothing to ache with feather light kisses. “You have that. You have me.”

He let me go, moving before me to stand tall and using his forefinger to tilt my head up to look up at him before kissing me sweetly. It didn’t stay sweet for long, the both of us ravenous.

How had I survived two days without this? And would I ever be able to survive another minute without it?

Caesar led me back, my back pressing against the cold glass and in response I opened my mouth, begging him to ruin me. The next couple of moments were a blind blur of groaning, grinding and ecstasy as we tried to get my clothes off but kept getting distracted but somehow I ended up naked, laid out of a pile of blankets and gasping as Caesar feasted on my pussy.

“Why… are you… so good?” I whined, my hips jerking with every touch he graced me with, following every roll of his tongue and pump of his fingers.

God he felt like he was delivering me straight to heaven, which was diabolically sinful because there was nothing holy about this.

I whimpered following a well placed curl of his fingers against my g spot, the rough pads of his skin so delicious against the softness within me it had me almost coming, when the hand that had been kneading my hip moved to my lower stomach and pressed down right as I tried to push up.

I snapped my head, trying for a glare but my eyes rolled back half through when he moved again.

“Stop… moving.” he rumbled, his voice all bass and scratchy, before he slipped his tongue into my hole.

“Fuck!” I tried to jerk my hips but I was trapped. And somehow the knowledge he was barely using any force to hold me down to eat me out exactly how he wanted me had a full body shudder rocking through me. “I’m gonna…”

“I know.” he mumbled, barely moving away from me as he spoke.

I came with a mewling of his name, hands snapping down to fist the fur of his shoulders, which had him growling.

He continued to lick me through my orgasm, kissing at my sensitive hole when I began to jerk under the overstimulation. And then he began to move up, trailing slow, loving kissing up my thighs, across my stomach, between my breasts, before stopping at my cheek.

He paused along the way at each of my scars, kissing along the thin lines forever etched across my skin. That was the first time he’d ever acknowledged them, and do so while kissing them obliterated all the self-consciousness I felt about them. And by the time he pulled back enough to look at me, I was crying,

The soft love in his eyes was instantly overruled by concern as he reached up to cup the side of my face. “What-”

“I love you.”

I could say that. I could say that while we lay naked moments from sex. I could say that while I kissed him. I could say that and watch as the worry melted from his eyes, that same starry-eyed look I know I wore looking back at me as he whispered the words right back.

And before I had the chance to pull him down for a kiss, the world shifted. Or rather, I did. I was no longer on my back but settled on his stomach, my legs snapping open to drape over his sides as he lay back, his warm rough hands settling on my hips. I was beginning to think he liked them.

My eyes widened, gazing down at him as he shivered, his eyes hungry as he trailed them down my body seated atop him as though I was something precious. “Are you sure?”

His eyes met mine again and I understood that look of longing. I felt it for years. The craving of needing someone’s touch. He rolled his hips, his hard cock rubbing against my bare ass.

Well, I was a queen. And I couldn’t imagine a more perfect throne.

Bracing on my knees, I lifted myself enough to reach back and take hold of his hot dick, lining it up with my hole. He felt perfect slowly pushing into me as I lowered myself, the new angle pushing him deeper than before. And when I was fully seated we both groaned, his entire body shuddering.

“Fuck.” he growled and my hips snapped forward with a gasp.

One wide eyed look at him and he knew exactly what he needed to do to break me now. And if I hadn’t been so busy trying to keep myself together I would have tried to say something to wipe that smirk off his face.

I did something else instead. All it took was rolling my hips forward again for his mouth to drop open with a whimper, his own eyes crossing as his head tipped back. “Alina,”

I bit my lip to stop my own whine, my name never sounding so wonderful before. And the fact that it was him, that I could bring Caesar to this level of pleasure, made the fire rolling through me turn volcanic.

I rolled my hips again and again, adding a bounce to my motions when his hands tightened on my hips, his nails biting into my skin. God I couldn’t wait to see the bruises he left.

“Fuck, Alina, yes. So good.” he breathed, my hands on his chest feeling the growl in his words.

I needed more. More praise, more of his words tumbling out as he got lost in our pleasure.

And then as I rolled down, possibly slowing down just to hear him moan, Caesar snapped his own hips up and I yelped. Finding his eyes, I saw that look of admiration, but also that hunger. And the reminder that he was still King. But I was not backing down.

My challenge as I moved slow once again was all it took to set him off. His grip on my hips tightened and he stopped holding back, pounding up into me as he held me in place.

“Fuck!” I fisted his fur, head dropping to rest onto his chest. It was all I could do as he used me to push us both closer to a release, his hips slamming up as he pulled me down.

“Good… wife.” Caesar groaned, his lips moving to brush against my ear. “Always… so good. So… pretty.”

I whined, my entire body tensing.

“Always… looked so… fucking perfect. You are perfect, Alina.”

I was close, so goddamn close. And he was right there with me. All we needed was for someone to break first.

“My perfect wife.” Caesar spoke again, his lips trailing small kisses from my ear down to the junction of my neck where he opened his mouth and let his teeth graze my skin before growling, “Mine.”

I vision went white, then black, then strands of black fur as my back arched and my second orgasm rippled through me. Caesar was right beside me, a roar leaving him as his own body convulsed, his warm cum filling me.

But he didn’t stop there, even after I collapsed onto his chest boneless and shivering, little moans leaving me with very languid thrust he kept up. It was like he couldn’t stop. He had me, could have me in any way he wanted, and what we’d just done would never be enough.

“Caes,” I whimpered, the pleasure bordering on pain as my overstimulated body tried to pull away from him, but I had no strength to even lift my head.

But he knew, he always knew me better than anyone, and so he stilled still buried deep inside me. Our chests heaved, my entire weight upon him. His hands moved, finally releasing my hips and leaving them feeling cold and lonely, to trail his fingers up and down my spine, drawing aimless patterns as I always did against his birthmark.

“So smooth.” he rumbled, my body rising and falling with his words. “So perfect.”

“You said that.” I slurred, so close to falling asleep as his steady breathing and soft touches lulled me. With him still inside me, his warm pooled at my core, it had me feeling complete. And it helped I was utterly fucked.

“You are perfect.” Caesar whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. “Never… said it enough. But you are… perfect.”

It was almost like he was trying to talk his way into my pants. But this was different, he was different. Caesar never went off on tangents or indulged in senseless fantasies. He said exactly what he meant, and he meant this.

I was perfect in his eyes, pretty. And I was his. His mate, his wife, his queen.

“I’m yours.”

His cock twitched inside me, the chimp taking a sharp inhale before wrapping both arms around me and squeezing me tightly against his chest. “Mine.” he growled deliciously.

I tilted my head back, finding his eyes. “Are you mine?”

The primal glint that shone back at me cooled, the possessive slant in his eyes and the smug pride of his smile dropping away to show him, my Caesar. My friend who had given me a life I never thought I would ever want but I knew I was happier here at the end of humanity than I ever would have been living among them. My King, who had given me a home in a colony so different to anything I had ever known and yet I fit in so well it was like I was always meant to be there. My husband, the shadow at my back who carried us through the hardships this life threw at us, the man who had pulled me through the hardest days and reminded me I was never alone.

My Caesar, my mate.

He brought one hand to cup the side of my face, running his thumb across my lower lip before guiding my forehead down to rest against his own. “Yes.”

“I love you.” I whispered, wishing was more than just those three words to express the depth of my feelings for him, my gratitude, my devotion, my love. But like always, we didn’t need those words. We knew how deep the love ran, how fierce it was.

We two souls meant to find one another, one being separated and now reunited by our love.

And even as he whispered those words back I knew he did love me, a love far more than actions or words or frivolous gifts. To love one another was to breathe, to admire the views from the tops of the trees, to feel the warm sun on our backs. To love him and to be loved by him was simply to live.

“I know what happened was wrong. And your dad and I should have spoken to you and I am sorry you found out the way you did but…”

But what? But I don’t regret it, and that if I could back and do it all over again I would. That I would go back and ensure we’d done it sooner. That even though I know everything now has to change, I don’t want things between us to change even though they already have and there’s nothing I can do to fix it.

“… but I want you to know I’m still me. I’m still Alina, and I love you so much and I don’t want anything to change between us. You are- I care about you, and your brother and your father. Things don’t have to change, I don’t want them to change.”

I watched, unable to breathe as his eyes bounced between my own, waiting for him to say something, anything.

An ape hooted, wind rustling the bush we stood beside and sending speckles of setting golden light across his dark fur.

“Can we talk later?”

Now really was not a good time to talk, especially not about something this big. I should have stayed home.

“Yeah. Yeah, of course. I’ll see you back at the colony.”

I bit my tongue as he left, forcing myself to be okay with him walking away. With my power I could tell him to come back, to sit down so we could get through this but that would be abusing the power I already did not want. I needed to let him decide how we moved forward.

And so I got back onto Oreo and rode back to the females, finding Ash animatedly signing to some of the babies about a rabbit hunt his father had taken him on years ago. His eyes caught mine and he smiled, then remembered everything and he quickly ducked his head.

I couldn’t even be overjoyed that my nephew was alive and well.

“Mama,” Cornelius cheered when he turned to see me walk up, the prince rushing to climb onto my chest and snuggle close to me. “Will I hunt rabbits when we go back to the forest?”

When, not if.

I hated the stab of jealousy that rocked through me. He was a child, he should be allowed to be ignorant. Yes he knew what was coming but to him there was no other option but to win.

I looked down at my son, those brilliant hazel eyes looking back at me, but they didn’t shine as bright as they used to. He’d watched his father die, been ripped from me as his home burned. He’d be orphaned, left in the forest with no idea of if they were safe or where they would go.

Someone should have checked on him and that someone being me, I am his mother. Instead I kept handing him off to play 3D chess in this building war. I should be better than this.

But those bright eyes kept watching me, the excitement and wonder and total trust shining up at me as he knew I would keep him safe. I had to win this war, for him. For his brother. For all these young apes who deserved to grow up in a world without the threat of humans.

“Probably.”

Lily ran over to join us, also climbing me. “And me? Can I hunt?”

I wanted to say yes, the realization that I could use my title as Queen to get more females trained in hunting and defense, but Tinker came rushing over and pulled her daughter off me with a snarl.

“Absolutely not. I would not trust you with a basket of herbs. And do not touch the Queen.”

“It’s okay, Tinker.” I spoke up, noting how she flinched under my words and would not look at me. “I enjoy the company.”

The female’s eyes met my tentatively, unsure if I was being genuine or merely saving her from embarrassment. I smiled lopsidedly, giving her my most honest gaze. “I don’t want anything to change. Except females being allowed to hunt. That we are definitely changing.”

Glancing around, finding the other females watching us, Tinker jerked her chin for me to follow and headed further into the abandoned building, the four of us now out of sight. “You cannot say that.”

I frowned, relieved she was finally looking me in the eyes but not understanding the anger I found there. “It’s what I want. I don’t want to be isolated from-”

“Ape way!” she snapped, cutting me off. “There is a way that we do things, who we show respect to and how. It is how we do things. You want it to change, you want us to change, be more human. You accepted this new role, now you must be ape Queen.”

Her words sunk in deep, cutting me in ways I didn’t know could hurt.

I didn’t want them to be human, I wanted them to be apes.

But I wanted to be human. I wanted human logic and human thinking and human ways. I wanted to have everything. Caesar, friends, my sons, peace. I wanted the forests and to chase the sunset with my boys.

But life doesn’t care what you want, it doesn’t wait for the right time or change the rules for you.

I mated with Caesar and became the Queen of the apes. That title, the responsibility, was something I now had to carry. I had to learn, just like I had when I’d first met Caesar, and as I had when I’d moved in with the apes, what my place within the colony was.

Rocket, Luca and Maurice had never outright said they were going to stop acting so distant with me, merely reassured me they did not hate me and were thrilled with what had happened. Blue Eyes had said we would talk but I had no idea which way the conversation could go.

I had to start acting like a Queen, hold my head high and accept the level of respect they were showing me because it was owed to me. I had to step into my new role.

“I understand.”

With a firm nod and a snort, Tinker took Lily and left, Cornelius still silent as he looked up at me from his perch on my chest.

“Mama,” he whispered, “why are you sad?”

I smiled, and even he was able to tell it was fake. “There’s just a lot of things changing and I miss the old way.”

“Do I have to change?”

“No. You are perfect. All you need to focus on is getting bigger and stronger and learning all you can about the world. Your father and I can handle all the rest.”

Squeezing the young ape tightly, I led us back to the main room and set him down so he could rejoin the circle of enamored apes. Lake brought me a plate of food and while my instinct would have been to join Tinker at one of the circles of females eating, I knew that was not my place. The Queen ate with the King, away from the others unless Caesar invited someone to join us. And with him not here, I was alone.

“He’s doing much better.” Ellie spoke, startling me as she sat beside me, her own plate in her hands. See! I wasn’t the only one who didn’t know the rules.

Alex moved to sit with the babies, the two having just entered the room after caring the for injured all day. I watched as Cornelius sit beside the teen, a lot of miscommunication happening as the baby and the boy tried to talk, but Alex was coming a long way in his signing abilities.

Ellie stifled a yawn, her eyes swimming with the unshed tears of the losses she had carried the past few days. But still she managed a smile. “Apes heal a lot faster than humans.”

“They are strong.” I agreed. We ate in silence, watching our children laugh and smile while the weight of what had happened and knowing what was to come rendered us speechless and frightened.

It was after sunset when Malcom came to get Alex and Ellie, offering me a tired smile as he approached. “We’ve managed to get most of the weapons distributed. There are quite a few on the Bridge. It’s not much but it’s a start.”

I nodded. A start, but not enough.

“Caesar stayed at the lookout. He’s asking to see you there, after the boys are asleep. There’s an escort outside waiting for you.”

“Thank you.” I replied, wishing them a good night and retrieving Cornelius. Many females had done the same, moving to one of the nests scattered throughout the room. Along the floor-to-ceiling windows gorillas stood silent as they looked out at the dark city.

Led by Willow to our nest, I stroked Cornelius’ forehead until he was asleep, blinking away tears as his little frame relaxed when he finally drifted off. He was too young to carry so much.

Movement from the corner of my eye had me looking up to find Blue Eyes approaching, his eyes not leaving mine for the first time in days as he stared at me directly and moved to sit beside me.

I had to let him speak first, to say what he felt and help me understand him. I could speak all I wanted but until I knew where he wanted this conversation to go, I had to let him guide us.

“Koba told me about your scars.”

I hadn’t expected that. Nobody had ever acknowledged them, Koba only looking at them once as he understood we shared the pain of humans and our hatred was as deeply etched into our being as our scars were.

“I know what humans did to you, and what they did to him. I know you are an ape, you always have been. To me, you are ape, Alina. You are my…” he paused, his hands stilling as his eyes glistened in the ambient firelight.

I was Alina, the human who his father had loved. Alina, the human who had saved his friend as a baby. Alina, the human who had become an ape. Alina, the friend who Caesar had relied on after Cornelia had died. Alina, the female who had helped raise his brother.

But what was I to him?

I did not want to force him, had never once wanted to erase Cornelia’s memory, but I loved him so much.

“Mother.” he signed slowly, flinching as though he thought saying it aloud would burn him. or maybe he thought I would react negatively. When I didn’t, he kept going. “You are my mother, but I am not-”

“Yes you are.” I leaned over to grasp his hands before he could sign more. “You are my son.” My voice cracked as I let go of his hands and reached out slowly, waiting for him to let me rest my hand against his cheek. When he didn’t stop me, I cupped his face softly. “I did not birth you, but I have been here for almost your entire life and I love you, Blue Eyes. I love you and your brother. You are my son.”

Both our eyes welled with tears, the boy turning to face toward me.

“I know I am now Queen, but you are still my son as you always have been and nothing has changed. Nothing will change between us. We can still argue and sit together, and I’m sure as hell still going to treat you like my boy who is growing up too damn fast. And you act as you always have because there is nothing I want more than you. You are growing up and things are not going the way your father and I wanted for the colony but you are so brave and I know we’ll get through this.”

I ran my thumb along his cheek, careful of the still healing wound from the bear attack weeks ago.  

I would play the part of Queen. I would distance myself from my friends, place myself on a pedestal far above my allies. I would be what the apes needed me to be, do what they needed me to do. But I would never give up my sons. Not ever. And if I had to use every ounce of my authority to demand the colony accept that, so be it.

Blue Eyes and Cornelius were the sons of Caesar and Alina, princes of the Ape Colony. It was how things were going to be.

If any ape had a problem with it, I would be happy to show them how human I could be.

“But I am not yours and you and father-”

“You are mine.” I whispered. I would say it a million more times if that’s what it took for him to believe it. “You are mine. Nothing will change that. You are our son, just as your brother is.”

Blue Eyes nodded, sniffling as the tears began to fall. I surged forward, wrapping my arms around him and pulling him close to me. “Shh, it’s okay baby. It’s okay.”

Those arms around me weren’t just clinging to my comfort, they were offering it right back as he squeezed tighter when I jerked as my own tears fell. But this was what we needed. To finally forge our way through that wall together and to cry about it.

“Father… looking for… you.” he whispered as he pulled away, wiping his cheeks.

“I know. I’ll head over there soon.”

Blue Eyes nodded, looking down at his sleeping brother. “I will stay with him.”