okay so. this might be getting a bit out of hand. possible ch2 coming?
It’s quite silly, Shun thought to himself as he bent over the sink, feeling that unpleasant itch in his throat. He never took himself for the kind of guy to fall in love so easily, let alone so deeply. His siblings and friends would often say jokingly, that the only way he’d get together with somebody was if another person confessed to him and he felt nice enough to say yes; Shun always agreed, wholeheartedly. He was never a romantic, and he was never good at picking up clues of that kind from people around him – there had been many times when, only much much after the fact, would he find out that somebody had nurtured feelings for him and attempted to flirt, only for him to not even notice the fact. It would always end in the same way, though – after enough fails, the other person would back off and lose interest; if he can’t see their advances, what kind of romantic partner would he be? Terrible, probably, Shun would always answer in his mind. He was a better sibling and friend than boyfriend, at least he supposed so; it wasn’t like he had any experience to back up such an assumption. Yet, he found himself in this new situation.
As the itch rose up his throat and bordered on being nauseating, Shun coughed out the symptoms of his problem. His coughing sounded unpleasant, wet and pained; Shun was glad nobody was here to hear it. Soon enough the sink was filled with petals and leaves, blue and green creating quite a beautiful composition if only it wasn’t for the dark sticky blood covering the soft plants. After a few more coughs, these last ones empty, Shun straightened and tried to even his breath. He looked at the mess in the sink while he did so, thinking about the meaning of the plants that have been growing in his body for a month now.
Blue roses and mint leaves. Shun wasn’t familiar with flower language enough to attribute these plants any meaning, but he didn’t need to do so; just looking at them he had long figured who was the person that he felt such strong emotions for, enough to the point of incapacitating himself with such an illness. Shun was, by all means, quite aware of his feelings for a certain green-eyed blue-haired man that he had met only a handful of times; he had met him so rarely, in fact, that he could count their meetings on his hands alone. That was precisely why he found this whole situation silly; how could he catch feelings for somebody he barely even knew?
Shun took a rose petal in his hand, twirling it gently, and thought about the man that was the cause of this trouble. Toshio. Toshio was, quite objectively in Shun’s opinion, an attractive man. Tall and stylish, he carried himself like a person of certain status, and it felt as if everybody around him paled in comparison. At least, that was how Shun saw it – the few times he had seen Toshio, it was as if a painting came to life and was walking among them, radiating with confidence and beauty like no one else. It was hard to believe he was related to Yuri and Serena, maybe because Shun had known the twins long enough to see the less-than-perfect sides of the two; how Yuri would scowl when he was displeased, or how Serena would neglect her looks if she didn’t feel like it. When comparing the three, Shun was under the impression that Toshio seemed a bit more pristine, polite maybe, not the kind of person to give back-handed compliments or to snarl at other people; he always had that pleasant shining smile on his face, and his voice mirrored that attitude with an even pleasant tone that seemed quiet but was easily heard even in a crowd. But no, Shun confirmed it with Serena plenty of times – the three were blood, by all means, related through and through. Funny how an age gap made them be so different.
Shun shook his head, he was spacing out again. Lately, he can’t help but get lost in thoughts about Toshio all the time, like a teen girl experiencing her first crush on the popular boy at school. And boy was Toshio popular. How could he not be, after all he was quite a famous person; a model, no less. Shun could see why.
Shun collected the petals and leaves with the dried-up blood on them, throwing them into a small plastic bag he was going to throw out when he went out in a bit. He had managed to keep this problem of his a secret from everyone, and even though he noticed the concerned or suspicious looks his friends and family would give him every now and then when he excused himself to the bathroom all of a sudden nobody would question him. He just hoped he could get over this quickly enough without issues. A month wasn’t that long, he was sure that soon enough his feelings for the unreachable man would shrivel up and leave him be, but every time he thought about Toshio his chest would just get tighter despite his hopes. Distance nurtures love, as they say.
When he finished cleaning up and dressed himself, it was just the right time to leave. He had been invited to a party, some kind of inauguration by his siblings’ acquaintance; he wasn’t particularly interested in going, but he thought it’d be good to at least show up and pretend like he wanted to be around so many people in his current state. He hoped Toshio wouldn’t be present; he didn’t want his symptoms to flare up in such a place.
Shun wasn’t lucky. The moment he stepped into the venue, he spotted that wavy blue hair among the crowd, unmistakably Toshio’s; confirmed by the fact that he saw Yuri and Serena right next to him. Well, all Shun had to do in this case was just avoid the three of them, right? He held nothing against the twins, but he knew well that if he talked to them then their brother would, one way or another, end up in the conversation, either because he brought something to his siblings or because one of them beckoned him close.
Shun was an unlucky guy. Betrayal, such he decided to call this, came from his best friend, Kaito. Kaito, dearest friend Kaito, had found out that Toshio wasn’t impartial to the same scientific topics as himself. Shun didn’t understand those that well, that was outside his scope of specialisation, but he could tell by the look in Kaito’s eyes as he was talking about some project he had offered to Toshio that his friend was very excited about finding somebody that could share his passion more deeply; he appreciated Shun, of course, but at the end of the day an ornithologist wouldn’t understand quite that much about photons and quantum physics. He beckoned Toshio to come closer so that Kaito could continue talking with the man’s input, and the casualness between them made Shun grimace slightly; no, no, he wasn’t jealous Shun thought to himself, why would he be? There was nothing to be jealous of. It’d be selfish to be jealous of his friend finding somebody with whom he had such common ground, and it’d be selfish to be jealous of their casualness and the way they seemed to be so easy around each other – not unlike Shun and Kaito were, but that was a friendship the two had developed over many years, not just in the span of a month or two –, how they looked at each other with something in their eyes and spoke about things that Shun felt totally out of the loop of while they themselves understood each other perfectly and, and-
Shun excused himself quickly, apologising for the interruption. He couldn’t ignore the sudden itch in his throat born from his thoughts, and he wasn’t about to risk throwing up a bunch of plants in front of a crowd. He covered his mouth on his way to the bathroom, trying to hold back any stray petals that might’ve already risen up in search of a way out of his body that was certainly not made to house them.
What he failed to notice then, was the unreadable expression Toshio had on his face as he looked at Shun’s back as he was leaving, something knowing in his eyes. He excused himself to Kaito, citing wanting to make sure Shun was okay.
Shun closed the bathroom door behind him, hoping that in the short time he will occupy the space nobody would come in and see him doubled over the sink. He would need to figure out how to get rid of the flowers here, he thoughts as he went through the actions that became routine now, coughing and choking the foreign bodies out of his throat. It was harder this time, and after opening his eyes to look at what had come out Shun could tell that he was past the point of just petals, as he saw basically full flowers bloodied in the sink; ah, he thought, that explains why it felt tighter this time. He hoped he wouldn’t reach the point where he would struggle to breathe. Shun couldn’t finish his thought, as he suddenly had a coughing fit, a stronger deeper itch making his throat burn. A strong smell of mint filled the room, so strong that Shun felt his eyes sting slightly. He struggled to even his breath, feeling slight panic swell in his chest; it was only getting worse. It was supposed to get better, no? He was supposed to let go of these feelings, let them shrivel up like the flowers and move on. So why were these plants only getting stronger, healthier, taking up more space in his body?
He felt a gentle hand patting him on the back, helping him cough up whatever remained lodged in his throat for the time being.
— It’s okay. – a gentle, painfully familiar voice told him in the same tone one would use to soothe a child. – You need to let it all out to breathe.
After a few more coughs, Shun finally let out a sigh free of obstruction. Still, he didn’t straighten or look up to the man that helped him, that came to his comfort. A soft handkerchief – must be expensive – touched the corner of his mouth, as Toshio was gently cleaning away the blood that remained from the flowery fit. Shun really felt… spoilt. Nobody ever treated him like this, and usually he’d complain if someone tried to, but this time he felt… quite happy about given such attention, especially from Toshio.
— Do you feel better now? You gave us quite the scare, leaving like that. – Toshio finished, folding up the handkerchief in such a way where the blood stains on it wouldn’t be visible and putting it into his pocket. He gave Shun a smile, concerned on the surface but Shun could tell that there was something else, something knowing behind it, something that made his stomach twist in a way he couldn’t really describe. Shun nodded. – I’ll take you back to your place, alright? You’re probably not really up to mingling in a crowd right now.
Shun worried. Spending time with Toshio would just make his feelings bloom stronger. He searched for an excuse, searched and searched, and he was about to mention that the flowers needed to be cleaned up, but Toshio caught his gaze an interjected that he would take care of that, that Shun needn’t to worry. He should go wait for him while Toshio dealt with this mess. Shun nodded, obedient. He couldn’t find it in himself to argue with Toshio. He really was deep into this, wasn’t he? He would always have the energy to argue with anybody, with Kaito, with Yuto, with Ruri, but with Toshio it was like he was hypnotised by the calming voice and expression, so convincing and comforting.
He left the venue with his chest a bit tighter than he had woken up with.
