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Now that I’m studying bio, may I just say how fervently I wish my primary association with the words “alpha, beta, omega” was literally anything other than what it is

My nutrition professor was talking about vitamins and said, “the only reason you all even know the words alpha and omega is because of sororities,” and I wanted so badly to raise my hand and be like “if you’re gonna be a dick for some reason, please let me explain to you in depth my immediate connotations for those words”

I’m in training to become a phlebotomist and at my last class we did blood typing and let me tell you when I walked into the lab to see A/B/O written in massive letters on the whiteboard I felt six years come off my lifespan

once I used a phrase alpha and omega of something during a lecture and one of the students giggled so hysterically I *knew* and I looked at her and she looked at me, and let me tell you, this was the most profound moment of horror and understanding I have ever shared with another person

That moment when you recognize someone from the Devil’s Sacrament

I sincerely cant remember the last time that staff rolled out a feature that improved this website in any way

When they moved the reblog button to the bottom of posts

Where was it before?

at the top we had to scroll all the way back up in order to reblog

Wh

What the fuck

this is a very relatable meme but i cannot stress enough that if you haven’t watched the good place you’re going to be very surprised to learn what words are being replaced here

I wish I had wind chimes instead of a penis

welcome to EVIL SCHOOL heres your timetable for the day first you have SHADOW MATH then after that you have CREEPY BIOLOGY then GYM

Jesus came back and said inflation is illegal

both kinds?

…there’s two?

hang on let me google something real quick

we should all implode and die forever actually

No they just got pissed off that you can do it irl, but only to like tires and bouncy castles and not people

woke up and turned over and there was a roach next to me.... wtf did we do last night....?

this feel like 30 year old Pheonix Wright coded and the plushies are gift from all of his female assistants he's collected over the years.

to be honest even if vaccines did cause autism i would rather live in a world where everyone is vaccinated and some of those people have autism than an unvaccinated autismless world. like ok whatever. would you rather have autism or polio. autism or measels. idk about yall but im choosing autism every time. its not even a hard choice.

You have to listen to the basic melody a while before you start to improvise.

For the first time in my tenure on tumblr, it's "THAT'S A PHOTOGRAPH?" and not "THAT'S AN OIL PAINTING?"

if this gets more notes than the memedaddy repost it would be really funny actually

i know the idea of 'hear me out' type posts is weird non-conventional attraction but i also have a fascination for the people whos 'hear me outs' are conventionally attractive characters from the most OBSURE media. like if you were asked to name a sexy character and your first thought is the girl from a mostly forgotten 1980s canadian animated scifi musical im gonna be way more intrigued by whats going on in your brain than if you had said like. the dragon from shrek yknow.

both are valid approaches to the same problem

i don’t think these are even different approaches

growing up I always wanted to be poorly understood by science

If your life is horrible and you need a new source of meaning and direction.... Do NOT find religion. Learn to identify plants.