Trans-Icon Behaviour

Grass pushing upward,

soil to give it strife

soil to give it life,

blood to feed it.

Blood from those that die,

to nurture the next fight,

I pray that if I die,

I see another fight.

I've always been captivated by media that touch on that bittersweet terror of being part of a cycle, you are a product of the before, and you will feed the after.

Poems like Wild Grapes and Out of Time by Kenneth Slessor, but also the song Seventeen by Sharon Van Etten really capture that for me. This poem recited by Gore during the fight against Mirmulnir makes that concept feel almost peaceful.

This is not a scary, or intimidating fight, but this poem really makes you feel like sitting in the calm before a storm. Objectively, the wording is confronting, talking about blood, sacrifice, and feeding the soil to give way for someone else, but emphasizes the joy in that.

As someone who survived a cancer diagnosis, this idea of being a part of giving way to the after, as being something to cherish, is so lovely to me.

Camp Cvnt 1

Camp Cvnt 2

She so slay here oml.

Camp Cvnt 3

In all seriousness I disconnected from Skyrim as a special interest for a while (working 6 days is a struggle I HATE it). I'd been feeling disconnected from myself for a while, living a good life by socialising, dating, living life, going out etc. but masking sooo much I forgot how to safely be me.

I had an experience recently doing public speaking and it felt like a conclusion to a struggle I'd been having for a while. Now I'm reclaiming me again, and that means Skyrim.

The follower mod Gore (whose story soothes and touches me to the core), feels like such a beautiful way to return to my oc Novrynea, and Skyrim generally.

Oh Elder Scrolls I've missed you.

Your girl might be going through a breakup, but it sure won't put a dent in my Skyrim hyper-fixation :)))))

Serving ✨face✨

I intend to properly mess around more with poses, but I passed through Dragonsreach and I love the Lux windowlight and had to screenshot her impulsively.

I also redesigned Novra to have a more subdued but still menacing appearance.

She's very much fresh to Skyrim here, some distance away from caving into a more cutthroat worship of Mephala. I have some ideas for some gruesome pictures later when she really cracks into brutal apathy :)

Just a super caz Mephala worshipping sesh on a Windhelm rooftop

One and only time I felt the urge to go camping.

If only I could teleport to an enchanted tent with everything I need, whenever I need a break (all the time fyi, constant escapism).

Novrynea Aundae, the Illusionist.

I love this pic, she seems so normal and relaxed here. It makes me feel bad when I imagine the character development I have for her.

Novra and Kaidan.

Slay 1:

Modding Skyrim into cute cosy hang outs far removed from the dragon apocalypse, one day at a time.

Left to right: Cat, Novra (my oc), Kaidan and Lucien Flavius.

If Lucien can sing, I 100% believe he can play a lute for the night's entertainment :))))

For these photos, I used the {Photo Mode} mod by powerofthree on the Skyrim SE Nexus, alongside the {ILV Poser SE} mod by Vobla (have to Google search to find it).

As part of the Photo Mode functionality, you can select poses within Photo Mode, including the ILV Poser options. For me, it (mostly) bypassed needing to use the rings to select and then play a pose in normal gameplay. Not 100% foolproof, and it took a LOT of tweaking to get things right.

And the 'tai' console command quickly became my best friend :)

Same world, same place.

Just 200 years apart.

Running through Bruma in the 3rd Era (Oblivion Remaster) to compare it with 200 years of change in the 4th Era (Beyond Skyrim: Bruma), fills me with a kind of yearning that only the concept of time marching ever onward can do to me.

Another Novrynea Aundae (my oc) and Val Serano pic of the spiced wine hang out.

Still messing around with getting a pose pack to make scenes a bit more natural looking, but the colour scheme of the sky is 100% Novra's vibe and too good to pass up posting.

Spiced wine hang out in Solitude with Val Serano (after an obligatory forgery of course).

I think this is the best pic honestly. When I write stuff I like to set up inanimate pieces of the setting as witness to two characters connecting.

This like it captures that vibe I like to go for perfectly. Having a fleeting moment of cosy conversation overseen by a structure that predates and will antecede these two for a long time yet.

"I've learned that if you feel you have no place in the world, you must make one."

Is a really ironic line of dialogue, when it's voice acted by a guy who regularly posted transphobia (among other bigotry) on his Twitter.

This is not an attack on the mod itself, the original creator, or any such thing (I don't know Liv's opinions of transness, but I do know she wrote some amazing lines).

This is just a thought I can never shake from my head when I get to that line in his quest.

By contrast, the Kaidan Revoiced - Community Expansion (KRCE) looks and sounds amazing, and I'm eager to see that mod flourish.