people actually jack off? kek. i just lightly touch a special nerve ending in my knee and i n
op nutted so hard it killed em
help me
i dont know where i am everything is so dark please someone h

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@explomatic
people actually jack off? kek. i just lightly touch a special nerve ending in my knee and i n
op nutted so hard it killed em
help me
i dont know where i am everything is so dark please someone h

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okay some time has passed now and i came back to this photoset and i genuinely think this is the funniest thing iâve seen this whole year.
1977 Š Masayoshi Sukita | snapgalleries.com
AH! âĽ
As a 4 year old, this was the funniest thing Iâd ever seen. I think I talked about it for days.
lmfao just walking away at the end like fuck this shit Iâm out
and theyâre all bottoms

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the tory momentum are not having a great time of it haha
They took my fuckong teth
Not all of them.
im glad my anesthetic-induced hot take on wisdom teeth removal resonated with you guys
some demon on here: *says some racist shit*
someone: hey thatâs kinda racist an-
some demon on here:
the amount of politicians (bill clinton, etc) who have been fired, punished, and even impeached for their polyamory is GLARING proof of institutional polyphobia. NAH im shitting you but that sure does sound like something someone here would say doesnt it

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I accidentally watched this ten times.
iâm crying
It is so much better with sound.Â
pep pep pep pep pep pep pep BOOMF
Iâm sobbing
a bop, a banger, and a jam are all different
but you have to feel the difference in your heart
a bop is something light or something you casually enjoy. you donât mind it/itâs cute in the moment.Â
a banger is something goes hard (some times unnecessarily) can invoke deep emotions. can fizzle out after some time has passed.Â
a jam is something that can be considered as nostalgic. it is a song that is a personal anthem, no matter what you are going through you just respond to it. it is immortal.Â

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A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, âMy car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?â The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, âWe canât tell you. Youâre not a monk.â The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, âWe canât tell you. Youâre not a monk.â The man says, âAll right, all right. Iâm *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?â The monks reply, âYou must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.â The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, âI have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.â The monks reply, âCongratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.â The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, âThe sound is right behind that door.â The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, âReal funny. May I have the key?â The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, âThis is the last key to the last door.â The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I canât tell you what it is because youâre not a monk
Originally posted by disneyasastrology
BWAHAHAHAHAH.Â
the way i learned this, it was always told through spoken word. And youâd do the door thing for ages. AGES. literally just making up any old material. âbehind the foam door is a door made of spinachâ that kind of shit. Go on until whoever is listening has already begged you to stop and has now gone on to pleading, clutching your shirt on their knees pleading. And when you finally said the last line? People went fucking nuts Like there was a good chance of just getting the teeth knocked out of you after telling that joke.
A friend of mine did that shit for 30 minutes on a camp once. The entire fucking bus just exploded in anger when she finished. It was a fucking massacre.Â
oscar isaac responding with âfucking unrealâ to being stabbed in ex machina is still to this day the most relatable moment in film history