a man, a plan, a canal, panama

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

The first rule of sewing is you can fix anything if you have patience, creativity, and a little bit of extra fabric! The second rule of sewing is AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

“i asked chatgpt-“ well i asked cassandra of troy, because i prefer to be told the untruth by beautiful women

Guys please reply to this with what your url means or references I’m really curious

penultimate is such a good word. its like....maybe the second best word

i love tumblr because sometimes i get an urge to rb posts about something nobody likes and everyone just politely ignores me. everyone's like oh he's fallen into madness again, he'll be fine later i guess

nastiest trick in the book is getting you genuinely deeply attached to a character whose name sounds fucking stupid in any other context. this WILL happen to you at some point in your life.

i miss my beautiful wife joann fabrics it feels as if eons have passed since i last saw her. this guy michael keeps waving her visage in front of me and saying she’s living in his house but he is lying to me. i know this because i went into his house and found only fragments and memories of my beautiful wife joann and pictures of her shadowed face labeled “online only”. michael won’t even let me order swatches from him

When you're unsuccessfully looking for something and start gradually increasing your It Could Be There range. Like yeah sure maybe the rice cooker pot is in the freezer, idk

clicking 'stay signed in'-buttons used to mean that u would stay signed in

Really big problem: world hard cold and full of obligations, but duvet warm

looking at jobs is like vintage toothpick sorter entry level immediate start ..... wow maybe I could be a vintage toothpick sorter.... *starts to envision a future where I am deeply involved in vintage toothpick sorting* *scrolls down* "5 years vintage toothpick sorting required Minimum!" *my dreams of vintage toothpick sorting dissolve into dust"

the public transportation pervert gets off at every stop