I Still Don’t Know How To Use Tumblr

LIKE I DID ASK FOR A VALENTINES ANY AT ALL

HOW THE BACKGROUND IS FILLED WITH GAGS

THE INTENSE RIVALRY

THE RACES AAAAAHHHHHHHH

From my immediate list of favs top 5

HARU URARA (this been my fav since before watching uma but still seee was soooo cute in this and the bit of just reappearing from trips def remind me of my shenanigans)

SILENT SUZUKA (IF IT WASNT FOR HARU she would have been my favorite cuz of how that comeback race made me cry)

GOLDSHIP ( love all her shenanigans it was sooooo sillyyyy)

SPECIAL WEEK ( while her being the mc of the anime meant she would probably get the most screen time did kinda bother me for a bit but when she has her moments she to me deserves them (just wish more of spica got more focus))

Like

Soo watched this on a roadtrip to cali

And finished it during the pouring rain

But with that some thoughts are being produced in excesss and need to put down

By holy heck this is on the level of how felt with Neon Genesis Evangelion and Chainsaw Man with the how the gore got me feeling

Like there is this stomach churning feeling I get when seeing gun brutality ( specifically the scenes how nerve h.q. got gun downed and also how the division got gun down during Makima assassination attempt) but watching that it had turned up to the maxx because people get offed soo many times in cyberpunk edgerunner and yeah kinda got spoiled with two main deaths cuz either memes or peeps just talking but the amount of deaths is so much shocking

Like I thought I would be like not gonna be surprised that much becuz I thought I could handle shows that kill off characters easily (aot, chainsaw man, Berserk) but this one felt different for an odd reason to me

Another thing I would want to point out is like when this came out and if I watched then I don’t think I would handle it like I feel like I wouldn’t be mature bout the deaths or nudity so I am pretty glad I watched it now than then

But time for a bit more analytical thing that caught me eyes and ears

- I really am soo interested in this whole world and environment like such a top tier world building and one of my new favorite fictional setting because how real it feels (like characters backstory feels like it fits in that world perfectly or how the characters struggle with the world makes it feel so much real) (I would never want to live in there btw like an amazing and interesting world but to me the looks like a hell that I would not have the guts or cyber guts to deal with

- There is something about how bright the colors used in contrary to the dark and mean dark world like yeah there is them big suits in black red but the how settings and colors are sooo bright( I really dig with it)

- The music is sooo good like with even that first song auggghhh I love it

- Another thing I that theme( idk if that correct term ) of betrayal that plagues the story like there is soo much of betrayal in the end with kiwi and that disgusting four eyed parasite that I hate , but also in the beginning there was a lot of betrayals like with Lucy, the ripperdoc, and kinda the mom ( like I know it not a real big betrayal but she was hiding that she work for Maine)

- But on the other side there are people who do have a bit of honor like my guy Falco who kept David promise

Some characters I want to slightly talk bout (keeping a bit short cuz a bit fried in the head)

-Lucy I really think she might be my fav character and is hard to explain like her backstory is so interesting and quite like that atleast her got more of an in depth look from the cast, I am also a sucker for the characters trope of “dreamers that dream of freedom into space” cuz I relate with that point

-David Absolutely love his character his arcs how he changes it all feels like “yeah that definitely how his character would progress” living out the dreams of the fallen and a very self sacrificial character for his allies also another character trope that I am in love with is how his ultimate power is just a base power of the big villain and how the inverted the trope to being actually defeated

-falco the absolute goat of a driver nothing else much to say but rock on with that stache

-Rebecca ok I like her she is a more lighthearted character that definitely needed in this cruel world but I wish me got more of her like if given more screen time I think I would have like her more

-Maine nothing much to say about him but he was such a cool mentor figure and shown the consequences for getting to much chromed but I wish David took that as a lesson but oh well

-I could keep on chatting bout more characters but not gonna cuz who gonna make me but that thing about how going out like build the legend I feel all of the names characters death serve a lot of purpose to the story and really like( that except for Becca cuz that felt just a death for shock)

Ok now how some final thoughts

As I just finished the show my friends ask me both my thoughts and what it was about

And kinda to lazy to re write all of that so I am just like copy paste it here on my blog

Bite me (hehehe finally got to use it)

Day 1 (watched four episodes)

Watching murder drones rn and it is a interesting like the action I love the concepts use like blades wings, their ideas on telekinesis and the brutality, I glad I am watching it now because younger me would be horrified by the robot gore

Like the horror and gore is crazy they do not pull punches when they rip them in half

Day 2( completed the series)

Holy heck guys I love murder drones I am whole year late but this was such an amazing show as spectacle to watch it definitely pretty confusing but it was such a fun time getting intrigued with the storyline and dudes the action is soooooo goood like aaauhhahgsgahsh and for the horror is sooo wow just baffling what they put their on the show

(They ask what it about and I try to answer it the best I can)

OK, so basically what murder drones is is a very post apocalyptic world where humans died right and that’s already post apocalyptic at itself then robots take over and then the robot experience a whole apocalypse where humans sent robots to destroy them before getting more sentence

I guess it’s still very confusing butthe whole show has many good horror, elements, and action pieces that it just flows really well to my brain And I think that’s why over 70 million People are so invested into the story like I’m just looking at the viewership for just this like thing and bye each episode has over like 10 of millions of reviews and that’s just so so crazy aaahhh

(Asked me what the difference between bots)

So there’s two different bots, the murder drones, and the worker drones 

The worker drones just look like regular bots but the murder drones are these highly specialized machine that have these blades wings

I really like these designs for both of them cuz they are both simple but execute what their purpose is

Like worker drones are like smaller and there are tons of so less height more production

But these murder drones are the pinnacle for me of edgey designs cuz they have swappable arms that can have knives chainsaws guns and weapon you can think of

They have wings that are made out of blades, which is just so so so cool And they also have this tail that spits out this corrosive acid that disintegrates metal

(Me continuing to summarize the plot to them to get their attention)

But the plant mostly revolves around this girl who wants to get out of this world and get back at the humans who sent these murder drones, and this girl is overly edgy as well like emo 2000s type of edge 

And this perfectly matches up with the second main lead, which is a murder drone that has this golden retriever energy It’s even stated in one of the episodes that he just fits the bill for such a innocent, cute dude cause unspeakable horrors 

So it had this fun dynamic of wanna be edgy girl and golden retriever murderer

So if you’d love that dynamic, I highly recommend this show. Also if you just love horror, continue double recommend like this is definitely for the folks who love horror

And as that being said, there is a lot of gore a lot of action definitely not for everyone but if you want to watch it, I highly recommend it because the ending just made it so so good like the indie animation is so cool and this is just one of corner stones of that community

(Now time for thoughts here)

They said I truly love the show and recommend it, but I’m quite sad that I missed out on watching it live with y’all and the community but I don’t think I could avoided like that like currently on the wait for the amazing and digital circus, Love that show and been a fan day 1 (not literally but I watched a week later once the first episode came out and loved ever since) but I ain’t that patient of person soo I am glad to see it in it entirely

TRIGGER WARNING SUCIDE

So I replayed doki doki literature club after some months after I first played it and I had to replay it cuz Sayori is just been like in my head each time I felt depressed (I know that sounds dumb)

But how she described her ways she felt during act 1 it has just been stuck with me

Like just a small example her line after getting confess to something like “I SHOULD be feeling happy” has been in my thoughts since I do feel that when hanging out with my friends because I love hanging out with out them they just brighten up the world for me and stuff but at times of just hanging out for bit too long I have dreadful feeling in my stomach for no particular reason and it just felt like “why aren’t you happy you are supposed to be happy”

And this got particularly bad during one hang out where it was all when then that dread hit and after dropping my friends off to their homes I was alone with my thoughts and at one point surrounded by them thought I just sped the car up hoping to crash and burn with no one knowing

So from that I been trying to improve throughout in summer just because of other close calls but I keep on remembering Sayori thing and one of the things I just don’t want to happen is to end like Sayori in way

Like I honestly not in the best mental space but there is a bit of epiphany I had while talking to a old friend I had and there was a part of me he was constantly screaming to not show this self to them (my sucidal thoughts) but I ultimately did and he was compassionate and that just led me into a more open way with sucidal thoughts like I told more of my close friends and it did kinda relieve me that they can accept me and some others can relate to me and it felt relieve and to kinda tie a reason on why Sayori affected me to do that is because I think she made me feel seen and I had a feeling if I continue to lock that part of me up I would have made her choice

So another thing before I stop writing about this part is that during that whole conversation with Sayori saying like I don’t want you to worry about me and more along the lines of that just makes me worst that kinda how abit I felt when coming out with friends about my suicidal tendencies, like I don’t want your feelings to me to grow but I also need it

It all feels so contradictory and I hated that

But stuff like that has been just running in my thoughts on how her lines just hit me in a deep relatable level that since I had the game and free time once again I wanted to try to see if anything has changed with my thoughts when playing through her route (I went to the yuri route when I first played but choose to love her cuz she made me feel seen)

And things I picked up is that I kinda also went what she went through without realizing it cuz I had two friends right that I had both former crushes on and I help them get together and during the helping them two I kinda realized huh I falling for a bit of both of them again and I can’t do anything about because they at the precipice of getting together so I would just be selfish if I just try to butt myself in ya know and aaahhgggh that final day with Sayori saying I wanted you to make friends but while you getting close to them it felt like a spear into my heart and then another part is that I just being selfish is just like got so much more relatable

So since the last undertale thoughts throughout summer I have been playing DELTARUNE and time for my Excess Thoughts on this another impactful piece of media that definitely change my brain chemistry

Time for the characters that I loveee with all my heart

Ralsei

This dude is the favorite for me like I relate to him a lot and like the added depth during 3&4

I love how fluff and cute

I love how he has a problem with toxic positivity (something I I have)

I love how kris reassures that you don’t have to smile

Ralsei is such a cool character to me from both the cool shadow mage design in chapter one to his silly little guy antics,

He to me is my favorite for how closely i relate to him in both actions that he does and how he feels

For the thing that i had a problem with (and still kinda do) is his toxic positivity which is why I love that in the later chapters they go more into it that it is ok to not be happy at time like it such a simple thing to understand but it just means the world for someone to say, also to add is that he has just that science with Susie in chapter 3 of not mattering and aaaaaggggg he so real for that and like related so hard of like the thing about how yea that they can move on without him (cuz that happen way to much times with old friends)

Another thing i got to mention is of how he is just gender nonconforming and i love that sooo muchh and need more of that in media and also I love to relate even more to my fav character in media

(He is me <|:D )

Susie

I love how Susie forces herself to be in the story and not like be a side character

She makes her own decisions

Okay for my actual like fully articulated thoughts is that Susie is sooo gosh darn impactful and amazing, like she makes herself known to narrative busting down doors and aagggghhh i love that about her

I love each time she in the spotlight since just all feels like it stepping her character up and there is little to none step back, and I how she has hope that even infects Ralsei oh my goodness that just made tear up

I really can’t say what hasn’t been said but all her faults and her imperfections just make sooo much her and love that, and how view her in the beginning she did seem like the hateable person( to me )but she does change and slowly reveal that omg she silly and aaghhggggh

Love her friendship with everyone it soo gosh darn amazing and cute how she just inspire and exudes that energy that lets other be them self with her

Also her training arc in chapter four was amazing and I really felt soo good each time I step up to challenge back

But yea I love the power of mean girl

Kris

I love the concept of kris

And I am sorry like I want to say sorry for taking control

Kris is just sooo cool my aura farming royal but aside from that I love their gremlin energy and also just knowing how to expertly play the piano, but just with how mysterious they are it just been a blast theorizes and looking at how other interpretations of them, i also really love their dark world design soooo much it just aaagghggg love that colors, kris to me is a person i really feel bad for taken over their life and i know the memes of blaming chara and the “i payed 25$” and while i always laughing my but off i just ultimately felt bad about them, so i know it just fictional characters but i just love them and want them to be happy so bleh that them thoughts for the the coolest player controlled character

The chapters

1

I love the the how intro to the world it just gives me warm feels and then dark world was so silly, from how the world is shown it feels me with happiness to see all the characters in undertale living a life avoid from war

But that dark world I absolutely loved the shenanigans and really felt amazing to play with all the new mechanics, like to me I love how multiple things can happen in one turn it just felt so freeing

But also the humor is always top notch as well like Susie and lancer dynamics of destroying and being “evil” but both of them turning good cuz of each other I love that, I absolutely love the way I got to interact with ralsei with hugs it was soo cute and aaghgagahhf

(Jevil)

So for mostly accidentally stumble to this boss I love that but

TO ALLL OF THESE SECERT BOSSES I AM A TERRIBLE GAMER SO IT TOOK ME DAYS TO DEFEAT THEM AND UNENDING HATRED WHILE FIGHTING WILL NEVER END

but with my dramatics out the way i honestly so much fun just slowly and mean slowly beating them and like for jevil it just fun to opposed is chaos by just slowly down and reacting it was great, and also i think jevil like is up there to my favorites cuz both concepts and designs he embodied but that applies to each boss and the reason they are a bit hated is just how long it took to fight them

2

I think the that this world was amazing and the character even more so, like the world is just soo different from what we had from Undertale and deltarune with the city vibe and I love that it felt full of characters it really made the city feel alive,

I also think that this cyber world music in the dark world is the best over world music in both deltarune and undertale

But I really love the characters in this like noelle it just soo cute to see their dynamic with Kris when trolling ( I did not play the weird route but what I see I also LOVE that angst) and expansion to kris relationship with her is cute, and Susie crush aaugghgag cuteness overload

Berdly is such a guy that took time to gettting use to like he I followed with the QUEEN thought of he hadn’t done anything bad he just annoying and I think that because of him belittling noelle

(Ok this is me from like week from finishing the game and thoughts changed on berdly since I been more in fandom spaces and watching some characters analysis and god dang change my about berdly cuz huh he just as confuse as me when romance comes in to question cuz like phrasing his romantic interest in Susie as confusing platonic and romantic love is sooo real and aaghhgg he is soo real for that)

Queen is just a goober that I love to see interact the world cuz she is such a a hilarious character and I can’t stop laughing when she be on the screen

(SPAMTON)

Ok so i really didn’t get the spamton hype that much but I like how silly this goober is and how the internet views this dude

Aside from that he just terrifies me for the way we get to his boss fight like it gives me chills and after defeating him and Susie confront kris and they scream that their not ok is just soul crushing

In a gameplay perspective I love this boss fight ability to fight back and not just this fight but like I love that we are able to act with the other characters I absolutely need and love that mechanic

3

I love the ralsei interaction in the beginning of this chapter first further most like that chapter is just an amazing way to get deeper with ralsei character and aaggghgg it just hits in a certain level that I relate a little bit too much and aaauuugggh

But from that emotional rollercoaster is that I love the vibe of this darkworld like silly games show is amazing from all the different costumes gags and soo much it brings me sooo much joy to an unprecedented level like like this to me is where the fun times peak and I love it, all the mini games while I am terrible at it it was fun, love that raise up the bats song soo much and (best believe I will talk about the deer shape elephant in the room later,)

But the main bad guy of this dark world is my favorite main bad guy just because of the relationship with kris and like everything about him from the style to the fun animations he just the whole package, and I am soooo happy that the fandom loves him as much as meeee cuz both the cosplays the art is forever fueling me rn,

But this where I get my absolute favorite none playable character Rouxls Kaard and it just because of his personality just shown up so much to me specifically this chapter, like I already thought his shenanigans were Hiliarous oneoffs like devoid of the story but this chapter got him all focus on being this ploy king and that was both hilarious and just fun to see in media of more poly stuff being normal, I just also think that the couple hating on him for being weird but also hot is just soo funny like aguavahfnjrj(I hope they all end up together thoo)

(knight)

I hate the knight soo much this stupid boss has me in a literal week trying defeat this like a usual secret boss takes me 3 to 4 days but why was this boss soo stupid hard I hate it hate it hate it hate itHATE IT

(Hey yall this a much calmer and more fandom delver version of me so now I think the knight is one of my favorite characters just because of how the fandom interpreted dess and the more I continue to learn about dess the more I love her like I think this how the fandom felt about gaster and also same thing happened to me with chara(like hating them and then fandom makes me love that character)but I am in love with dessriel especially that heartbreak Juan interpretation cuz it sooo good)

4

I love gerson soooo much but I would go deeper on that later,

So the light world part here was soooo interesting I really love how you get to do more meaningful stuff in the light world, also Toriel wearing the undertale outfit aaughhaygg sick as heckk and shenanigans in the light world is always greaat to experience, that aside I love the exploration of noelle home it just soo deep with character interactions just completes me like that whole Susie and noelle talking seen I love just reading the dialogue and got soo invested to them two being awkward idiots, and soul and kris Oo the more I see kris by themselves the interest to me increase exponentially like seeing both the normally with the choco milk (and them jumpscares) and weird route crash out from vids who are they keeps ringing my head, also I am really interested in this dess character cuz their room is such a subversion of the home ( okay this me from a week ago so I just want to say I love dess soo much from how the fans interpreted her and aaauhhudh I am a huge dessriel shipperr and while we are on the topic of ships krusielle is also another top ship since this week diving in the fandom like it both a mix of the silliness in the krusie ship, the angst of kriselle (since separated childhood friends)and suselle cutenes which is just such a perfect mixture aaghgaghhfg also poly win)

(GERSON)

Now let talk about the dark world which is mostly going a me talking about how I love gerson, like this dude wisdom has been applied in my real life now like how going left thing get you nothing but you still got some exercise or the talk with Susie and healing and like not giving up just made me what to try learning a Tagalog again after I failed, this old turtle has really just been a godsend of wisdom that hope impacted more people like me, other than that his battle was the only secret boss battle that I completed in a day and yall the amount of pride I had in myself was of the charts like I really felt that pinnacle of my effort was truely shown like he shown me that I have grown from the person I was two months ago and that something has grown with me and you should feel proud that you didn’t give up and for to this point

Other pieces of the dark world I want to just babble is how Susie really just embodies hope and I love that for her and also that scene where she gave hope to ralsei is so beautiful and I am feeling the tears each time I see that

As I said in chapter 3 that was peak of humor I felt this was the peak of the emotional impact for now

Overall thoughts

Some tidbits that want to add before I close this chapter is that during playing this game I had friends join and watch me and love when my buds that already have played watched me cuz I played if differently than they did and I love their surprise when i encounter something new to them (like in chapter one when u supposed to lead Susie I wanted to back track and turns out new dialogue their)

Another thing is the bosses

This is the first game that took me me days to defeat bosses like the typical secret bosses took me like 3-4 days and that darn knight took me literal week to complete and while I was frustrated as hell I loved that I had will and maybe (determination) to beat them but I love all of the secret bosses personality and just story about them and they all are in my top ten

I truly love this game a lot from the the story to the characters and especially the music as they all hit me deeep to my core

K POP DEMON HUNTERS

And this is general thoughts first

But idk where to start sooo

The tropes I love enemies to lovers soooo muchh it is always fun to see those dynamics and the way that Rumi trys to get Jinu to good side I love that ( a evil part of me would love to see that evil power couple tho ( like imagining them indulging in sin )

But the thing that really struck me is the family problems that are touch on like

“My can’t you love all of me” hit soooo close to home like still being in the closet and living with mostly conservative parents that care for you is aaghhgghgg idk why it relatable it that real to me but dam hit that nail with the head

Last thing before the characters is that the action is soo good like each fight each punch and attack thrown is soo beautiful

BOBBY

He’s the genuine greenest flag that’s ever been that I adored how much he adore the girls how much he puts his faith in all of the effort into them and he’s just so fabulous, He knows when to chill out and he’s just so happy and supportive, I need more people like him in my life or in the world in general his positivity and just emotional support is just needed in such a cruel cruel world and I’m so happy that the manager isn’t somebody who’s mean or doesn’t care I just love him a genuine good person that deserves the big bucks

JINU

What can I say that hasn’t been already said by the fandom but he’s just so so hot and that and also being I love me sacrificial character so much like top-tier characters all around and it’s just so tragic, but I cried tears on his scene came up and I love him so much 

Rumi

OK, I did not expect to like this character this much but her relatability I guess I’m just keeping and just secrets like that I know it’s bad but I relate to it hard and just cute scenes between Jinu and her I crave soooo muchh nothing I can add, but just her quote that I mentioned earlier really just struck a cord with me

Zoey

Absolutely adore Zoey She was a cute cute addition to this and her personality reminds of my bestie so yea I love her and also her background was so interesting I wish to hear about more of the other characters in the huntrix but I am happy that the only flaw about her is that I wanted more from her

Mira

What a queen, queen, queen, she deserves all the praise her beauty her style, She’s just amazing and I’m glad that she’s also into like feminine stuff and instead of forcing to dislike feminine stuff ya know like to me she subverted the like oh this typical not girly girl wouldn’t like girl stuff but I am so glad that she embraces aswell as the others you know, also I would hear more of her backstory and stuff cuz she just amazing

And I gotta talk about this

This one should be shorter cuz kinda tired of typing ( I lied)

So basically my little itty thoughts is that genocide route is something that unsettled me for the basic reason of losing all the friendly people in a slow crawl like seeing it said “but nobody came” was different and disturbing, but what even more was horrifying is that at first each death devastating to me and it came to the point of papyrus being killed which left me with unexpected tears

That was soo surprising to me because while yes papyrus is one of my favorites I would not say my favorite character in all undertale but his death just like suddenly came and impacted me in such a guttural way that we had to take like a 10 min break just to recuperate

And it was only that death made me cry all the others were surprisingly like seeing undyne fight for everyone just made me soooo happy and like her death was sad yes but seeing her die by fighting with her heart and soul for all was amazing and made love her even more

Other bosses death were just so unexpected to me to see cuz I was struggling in each boss during my playthrough and seeing my friend one shot most them just left me flabbergasted cuz wow I spent hours on muffet and then it took 1 press of the attack button and that all they wrote

Okay now time to talk about The final the penultimate and the character that is been one of favorites even before playing (sorgy for this extend into) SANS

but yea that biggest comment I want to say is just about the music cuz hearing Megalovania for the first time in its origin really just made me think how that song really alter a piece of life that I really didn’t expect since that song was one of the first songs I ever added to playlist and made me enjoy music and searched for more and that enjoyment of music is now always apart of me and can’t really love apart it, so just to say that song had a unbelievable impact to me that was like from this amazing game that only now I get play

Last comment is to go back about the horrific thing that I kinda notice while watching my friend play and it best put into this quote that sans said(The more you kill, the easier it becomes to distance yourself. * The more you distance yourself, the less you will hurt. * The more easily you can bring yourself to hurt others.) which really made sense to me while watching cuz at first I was devastated to every death and even cried at papyrus but slowly I got desensitized and even laugh when tsuderplane died and I really started viewing them more as characters and that like made another saying more sense in my head (One death is a tragedy, a million is a statistic),