Evil Queen Posting

me to the accursed whispering amulet: hey can you speak up please i have an audio processing disorder

Ragebaiting My Fat Amulet

word is there's an angel going around touching demons' horns inappropriately around the festival, so we're assembling a group to try to catch it.

Rasiese my hand are we going to kill it

im pregnant and its an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg. and an egg.

The egg never hatches it just grows legs and ambles about humpty dumpty style

Actually it's normal for the prophecized hero of light to be related to the demon queen. It makes it all the more tragic when, in their ultimate moment of purpose, one is forced to slay the other. It's a tragic twist of fate designed to make them forgo their humanity in favor of fulfilling their ultimate divine purpose. It's quite clever really. Sad, too. So that's why it's totally normal for it to call me mommy, and NO, it is NOT a kink thing. It's not. Don't say it's weird it's literally fate's cruel design. And yes it's normal for her to sit on my lap like that. Okay she can do whatever she wants with her hands. She's the hero. This is all in the prophecy actually- Gh.. This is fine too. It's normal for her. All heroes do this.

my subs unionized but theyre all trying to backstab eachother to get off. they keep coming to to me in private to confess their loyalty and i keep saying shit like "i know you're the only one i can trust with this" and "this is why youve always been my favourite"

this is the fifth fucking geode ive crakced open whys its all meat

my liege those are crab rangoons

I Defeated the Demon Lord but it Turns Out the Demon Army was Largely Unaffected and I Fell Victim to a Flawed Belief in Great Man Theory

trans women i love you

disabled trans women i love you

is putting fairies in a jar and not poking holes in the lid a trite cliche or a respectable classic, do we think

ignore the thumping noise coming from behind my back.

you should be grateful the jar is empty.

"this is unbecoming of me" is genuinely a useful thing to have in your mental toolbox

getting my little goblin minions to punch and stab me in the middle of the grocery store to try and whittle me down to half health so i can assume my final boss form and reach the top shelf

You let your minions stack on each other's shoulders to reach high shelves, the next thing you know they're solving complicated logic puzzles involving the coordinated use of their idiosyncratic personal weapons and learning important lessons about teamwork under pressure, and we all know where that ends.

the human brain is so cool, if you're tired and stressed enough, your brain will go, "don't worry, I got you" and shadows will start moving

and what's the genital situation on the shadows

oh this is my post

shadow pussys

As a principled feminist I'm often tempted to say shit like "are men capable of higher thought" but then I have to remember not to perpetuate gender essentialism and change it to "why do men choose not to think about anything"

As a principled man hating female supremacist I slay men on sight with a montante