hee heeeeee you found meeeee

tumblr said i “liked” your post, but in reality? i loved it. i love you

STILL???? STILL???? AAARRRGH NO FAIR

freshman year of college I (a simple lesbian) met a gay dude and we instantly clicked and started talking about our childhoods and stuff and discovered we were born in the same hospital on the same day so we became each other's beards and watched hentai together every weekend

That sentence started and ended in very different places

So you won that danimals sweepskate

In retrospect this is almost definitely the reason why putting your response in the tags is so common and popular

When I was a kid, my dad hated when I hung up anything on my walls. My art, band posters, movie posters, anything. Not with taxks, not with tape (it “ripped the paint off”) not with anything. At one point in 5th or 6th grade he came in my room and found me hanging up a Diary of a Wimpy Kid poster with tacos and he was like “EVERY HOLE YOU PUT IN THE WALL TAKES $10 OFF THE VALUE OF THE HOUSE.” so when I was mad at him, I’d insert tacks into the wall in places he couldn’t easily see just out of spite. Whoever owns the house now is probably wondering about it.

bro didn’t even know you could just fill holes with toothpaste 💀

I know this is about an owned house (that you should be touching up and repainting the walls of before reselling anyway???) but for ppl who are paranoid about putting holes in rental walls: don’t be. Put up posters. Shelving if you need it. Have hanging plants. Invest in a studfinder. Spackle kits are cheap and everywhere now, or you can use white toothpaste, glue, or even soft air-dry clay to fill holes. Scuffs and rub marks are considered normal wear and tear and landlords can’t charge you for them. Most places will have you fill holes but will have to repaint between tenants anyway, so even if the spackle doesn’t match the walls, it’s not a big deal. Check your state laws about what is considered normal wear and tear. Most states have laws covering everything from paint to flooring. For instance, in my state, carpet that is 3+ years old is considered past its normal life cycle and therefore any damage to it cannot be charged for because the landlord/management is expected to put in new carpeting. Before any move-out, check local laws considering paint, flooring, light fixtures, appliances, etc. Landlords and management companies make BANK on people not knowing that they’re paying for paint rubs that they’re painting over anyway and carpet that has been paid for 6 times over.

Reminder: they’re never ever ever ever going to give you your security deposit back no matter what you do. have fun with life.

there is a drought, not enough water to drink, yet the wealthy still have ornamental fountains running, full swimming pools, and lush green golf courses

geocachers stay winning

the thing they dont tell you about working with little kids is it wrecks your vocabulary. you hear a kid phrase something bizarrely in a way only a 5 year old can and now any time you lose shit youre like "it dissed appear"

wait ok mutuals what do you guys call your parents???????