"I know what a strawberry tastes like love." Well fuck you too.#itslonelyintheberrystand
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@everybodyctfd
"I know what a strawberry tastes like love." Well fuck you too.#itslonelyintheberrystand

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From the guy who's in the berry when I'm not: Customer: why don't the strawberries have sticks in them? (I normally give them with sticks to stop grotty hands getting on my plate) Colin: *gives stick to customer* Customer: can you not do it for me? Colin: do it yourself! Customer: I can't! I'm illiterate! And so the week begins again #itslonelyintheberrystand
Customer: 'do you have any real strawberries?' Me: *looks at abundance of strawberries before me* 'do you mean do you want a sample?' Customer: 'no I mean do you have any real ones that I can actually eat to see what they taste like.' That'll be a sample then... #itslonelyintheberrystand
Me: 'want some fresh strawberries?' Foreign guy: 'you are a strawberry' *winks* Not sure what this means #itslonelyintheberrystand
'Im just away in to do my shopping I'll come by on the way back.' Aye, right mate, see you then. #itslonelyintheberrystand

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Keep offering tasty strawberry samples to fasting Muslims #sorry#itslonelyintheberrystand
Offered a raspberry sample on a stick to a man today, he took my hand in both of his and sucked it off seductively as if I was feeding it to him...#itslonelyintheberrystand
if you ever wondered what the inside of a strawberry would be it's this.
This is one of those things that people should not calm the fuck down about, journalism at its absolute finest, so glad the carers were arrested, if anyone deserves being arse raped in jail its these wankers, what an absolute disgrace.

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Dominic should CTFD.
I should say I have no issue with people dressing the ‘hipster’ way, just that arrogant attitude that comes with it, and I hate the general attitude that comes with fashion. Style is about expressing yourself whatever way you want to. This was inspired by the abuse my friend got for wearing black lipstick on a night out this week. People can dress how they want as long as they’re not showing their private parts to innocent kids so CTFD.
I've just finished watching the series of Zeitgeist films which basically put forward conspriacy theories for almost all modern world warfare as well as solutions for the world's problems which center around a non-monetary based global system. I think its pretty telling that the first thing my sister had to say on it was 'it all sounds pretty leftist to me', it does seem perhaps a little unrealistically socialist, but the research and solutions put forward with the 'Venus Project', for example, are the most viable answers I've ever been given to the questions of how to solve global poverty or the rapid consumption of finite global resources (issues which I believe, by the way, DO come under 'the things we should get worked up about' in the info section). It was all very compelling stuff, I think even if most people don't believe in the content they should at least give it a watch! Oh and to the Global Corporations of the World... CTFD.
I'm not saying this kid needs to calm the fuck down, because... she is a child and she is most likely doing what ever the sick person behind the video is telling her to do. I predicted there might be an influx of preteen wannabe popstars after Rebecca Black's Friday hit so big but what I didn't expect was this (basicly child pornography). So to the pedo who put this video together, for all that is good in the world, CTFD.
Mary Bale should CTFD.

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http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2011/apr/24/old-firm-match-bombing-campaign
So this week Neil Lennon, the manager of Celtic Football club in Glasgow as well as two other notable Celtic fans were sent letter bombs to their famly homes. The article above provides the majority of what I have to say on the issue, and its late and I'm tired so I'm not going to add too much more, but I hope that this level of violence is what has finally, hopefully, woken the country up with regards to the sectarianism that is constantly in the background of old firm derbys. Its sickening to think that people would go to this length to claim their allegiance to a football club, religion or nationality... whatever their message was. And its clear this isn't just a one off incident, fans on both sides (as the article goes into in greater detail) consistently use violence and racial slurs as a means of supporting their football teams... it all just seems so unnecessary but yet so dangerous, so to all the bigots in Glasgow and around the world, CTFD.
I'm not really fussed about the Royal Wedding to be honest, especially since I don't get to reap the Bank Holiday benefits I would have had I been back home in the UK. However most of the hysteria was to be expected right? They do it everytime, and I don't really see the harm in it (especially when blogs as hilarious as the one above have been set up in honour of it). And the 'wasting of the tax payers money' argument is a bit weak given all the revenue the UK will receive purely on the influx of tourists that will undoubtbly occur this weekend. SO to the Royal Wedding haters out there, CTFD, there are worst things to get excited about than a wedding.