special agent stone

   Matthew was still silent, he was still thinking about what the woman said. Some part of him believed her words but a bigger part of him believe his husband words. “I…had to stop myself from breaking down in public Ev. It hurt and…” he said very quietly as his husband wipe away one of his tears with his thumb. “I am sorry that i did not realize you were in pain…sorry i was selfish. I need you Ev, i never want to lose you because of a fight. I love you” he said as he gently cleaned his husband wound. “Can…you hold me or just lay on my chest because i just need you, and i need you to hold me after we get your wound cleaned”

Everett placed his hand gently on the side of his husband’s face, letting out a sigh as he did so. He hated coming home wounded, he knew that they had enough going on, and there was always a risk of one of the boys seeing it. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I should’ve been there with you today, instead of in Berlin.” Everett had really been thinking about leaving his unit, especially now that they were married, and now it seemed like he was getting more and more signs he needed a job where he could be home more. “Stop. Don’t apologize,” Everett stopped him softly. “I just wanted you to know that telling me, instead of shutting down, is what I need you to do. Okay? That’s why I was mad.” He sighed, looking into his husband’s eyes hoping Matthew would know Everett wasn’t upset with him. “Yeah. I can do that.” Everett got a bandage out of the drawer beside where he was standing, putting it over his side. He could take a shower to better clean it later, but right now he was worried about his husband. “Come here.” He hovered over Matt, kissing his husband softly before moving down to lay his head on Matt’s chest as he had asked for. 

   Matt moved his hand away when Ev did not take and listened to his husband as he spoke. Matt voice was filled with tears and pain, “earlier this evening when i was getting some things for dinner…” he answered in a very quiet and timid voice that Matt rarely uses, “I…know..” he added. Matt knew Ev understand but he was still could not help it. He was so used to shutting down when he was hurting but he was trying honestly. “She…said that i should have died that night and he never saved me…and that reminded me of the hash words my step mother used to tell me all the time Ev….I am sorry” he added this time the tears where falling and Matt could not make them stop. Matt took a seat on the bed as Ev walked into the bathroom. 

Everett truly hadn’t gotten home from work mentally. Usually he was good at it, completely letting go of work when he got home, but hearing that this woman said these things to his husband was making him think of ways he could take care of it - and Matt probably knew him well enough to know that. “You know that’s not true, Matt. You know that she’s just a bitch.” Everett hoped Matt would listen to him, but he didn’t know if it would work. He felt like the worst husband in the world because he hadn’t been there with Matt when this had happened, he’d been working. After getting a wash cloth and wetting it with alcohol, he walked back out to Matt, and slowly wiped underneath one of his eyes with his thumb. “You know she’s wrong. You had a bad day, and I’m sorry.” He held the washcloth with alcohol up to his side, knowing the cut was pretty deep. When Matt reached for the cloth to help him, he didn’t fight his husband this time.

   Matt finally looked at his husband and listened to Ev. Matt was trying so hard to keep the tears in, the reason he was silent was because he knew if he tried talking, all the emotions will come out and so will the tears; he knew that he would not be able to stop the tears. “It just added to things….” he said in a quiet voice, “I ran into his mother who blamed me for her son’s death, my best friend who saved my life when i tried to…” he added stopping himself from saying the rest of it. “Plus the insults hurt Ev, it fucking hurt. Normally i am used to those type of insults but i could not handle them today” he sighed as he got up and walked toward his husband and stretched out his hand. “You have my heart and i am already married to you. Nothing is going to change my mind about that” he added tears starting to slowly fall. “Please, I don’t want to cause a fight because i can’t handle tonight with you and you being pissed at me. The bed has been and cold with you….”

Everett was trying something he had never done before. He was pretending like he was still working, like this was a case. The number one rule of a case was to never make it personal, and by not making it personal, it was the only way he knew how to have a somewhat rational discussion. “When did this happen?” He asked, eyes glued to the ground. “When did you run into her? You were fine last night, so I’m assuming it was today.” It sounded like he was interrogating Matt because of the mode he’d gone into, so maybe it wasn’t helping the way he meant for it to. “There’s no one in the entire fucking world who understands the way that I do, Matt. For God’s sake, I had people come up to me for months and told me it was my fault my daughter died. I should’ve taken her to the doctor sooner...I should’ve watched her diet more carefully,” he listed off the first things that came to mind that people often said to him. He was just trying to get Matt to understand that Everett knew, he knew how hard it was, and that all it took was one bad day to snap. What had pissed him off was that Matt shut down about it. As Matt stretched out his hand, Everett didn’t take it. “Please just...don’t touch me right now.” He needed a minute to calm down, he needed a minute to calm himself down before he did or said something he regretted. Everett paced back and forth in their room, not saying anything for a minute. It didn’t help that he was in pain. Everett had a high pain tolerance, but he’d been stabbed very pretty deeply, and without saying anything he took his shirt off. He walked to the bathroom to get a wash cloth, not saying anything even though he knew his husband wouldn’t be happy about the wound.

   Matt sighed and was silent for a moment before saying anything. He could not look at his husband because if he did, then he would break because he could not keep the tears from Ev. Matt ran his hand through his hair before replying, “I am just having fucking bad day Ev. Everything is hurting and why can’t the fucking past stay in the past. I thought i was over all this fucking stuff, i thought i was done with Erik’s…family and being blamed for his death.” There was pain, hurt and sadness in his voice. Matt still did not look at his husband. 

For once in their relationship, Everett didn’t know how to react. Part of him felt like Matt wasn’t happy he’d come home early. Like maybe Matt wanted to be alone. “Erik? What the fuck does Erik have to do anything?” Everett asked, almost immediately after he heard that name come out of Matt’s mouth. Now he was angry. “There’s a difference between having a ‘fucking bad day’ and something that has to do with Erik.” Don’t yell, Everett. Don’t be your dad, don’t let the kids hear you yelling, he thought to himself. “What is this? Is this some way of you trying to tell me you don’t want to get married because you thought you were over him and you’re not?” Everett honestly didn’t know, he had to ask. “Oh, and what the fuck would I know about being blamed for someone’s death, right?” You could hear the sarcasm in his voice like venom with every word, and the look in his eyes was scary. They were so dark, like the look he had when he was filled with nothing but anger. 

  Matt got little sleep because of nightmares and thoughts that played in his head over and over. Matt knew that today was one of those days, days where he had to fight and power through to get through the day. He had ran into Erik’s monther who blamed him for Erik’s death and said some things that truly hurt him and open some old wounds that were finally starting to heal and on top of that, he was dealing with a difficult client and case. Matt managed to keep a brave face through out the day and make dinner for the boys. 

   He was not expecting Ev to come back home early and deep down he felt bad that he did not jump and welcome his husband home with a kiss. Matt cleaned the glass as Romeo and Ev talked; he finally looked at Ev after cleaning the broken glass. There was tears in his eyes and he sighed softly opening his mouth but no words came out. He gave Ev a kiss on the check and walked toward their bedroom, seating and breaking down as he sat on the bed. 

Everett was so confused. What was wrong? The first thing that came to mind was the wedding. Had something gone wrong? Was Matt suddenly changing his mind about going through with it? That made no sense because the two of them were legally already married...this was just the party to celebrate it. When his husband kissed him and disappeared, he let out a sigh. He was a husband, but being a father always came first and Matt also knew that. Everett quickly walked to make sure the boys had their pajamas on, watching as Romeo brushed his teeth and helping Evan brush his. He put the boys in bed, telling them he’d be back to tuck them in with daddy in a few minutes.  As he walked into their bedroom, he felt himself freeze. Everett wasn’t good with emotions, nor had he ever been. He used to be good with them...until he lost his daughter. It desensitized him, as did his job. “What’s wrong? I can’t read your mind.” He wasn’t trying to sound harsh, but he was confused when they had just talked last night and everything was fine. Now Matt was upset, and instead of telling him why, he had ran into their bedroom. Everett sat in the chair at his desk across from the bed, waiting a minute before looking at his husband. “Is this about the wedding? Just tell me if you want to call it off.” 

Everett’s plane from Berlin home to London had actually been on time. As much as he travelled last minute for ops, he was used to getting on the next plane available, getting on planes that were delayed or had layovers. After this mission in Berlin, all he wanted was to be home with his husband and his sons. Their wedding was a week away now, even though no one knew that they had already eloped in secret. Well, no one but Naomi and SJ, at least Everett was sure one of them knew. As per usual with his missions, Everett had been injured. However, compared to most, it was nothing too bad. Just a rough wound on his side, one that could be bandaged up and taken care of. It was nothing he was going to worry Matt with. He didn’t text his husband because he wanted to surprise him, especially since he had gotten home early which didn’t happen often. The sun was still up, this meant there was a chance Everett would get to see his sons or even have dinner with them. He had his carry on bag, he had no luggage so he went straight to get a taxi to their condo. His heart was racing a little...Matt had that effect on him. Making him nervous, in a good way, especially after their talk over text about another kid. Everett got his key out of his pocket to open the door to their condo, and as he walked in he heard the sound of dishes being put into the sink. He had missed dinner...but at least he hadn’t missed putting the boys to bed, right? “Daddy?” Romeo yelled enthusiastically from the living room, the blonde curly haired boy running to greet Everett. “Daddy...you missed dinner.” He frowned, leaning his chin against Everett’s leg as he held onto it, looking up to his father. “I know I did, baby. I’m sorry...but tomorrow morning, we’re going to read and have pancakes. Didn’t daddy tell you about our new tradition?” He asked, leaning down to pick hug his son, referring to Romeo’s other father who hadn’t come to greet Everett. Maybe he was too deep in doing the dishes.”Go put your pajamas on, help Van get his on, too.” Romeo nodded, listening to his father before going to get his younger brother, walking down the hallway to their rooms. “Did you not hear me come in?” Or did you just not care? He was practicing not being so bitter, for the sake of their relationship, so he kept that thought to himself. There was a safe for his gun and other weapons that was way too high for either of the boys to reach, and his work things went in there, too. He could physically feel that something was off with Matt, and he noticed the broken glass in the kitchen as he was putting his stuff away. “What’s going on?” Everett didn’t know if he’d done something wrong, if Matt was mad he didn’t announce he’d be home early, but he was getting nervous in a bad way now.

Matt: I know. Just like i smile and grin when i get nervous. I sometimes don't get why you get nervous during my dace handsome

Matt: Of course. Surrogates and legal document can be hard work and a nightmare if not done correctly. Since you know all the steps and stuff and i have the legal background...it should not be bad

Matt: I understand. I remember it over text i told you my feeling for you lol Sounds good. We will talk to it more after sex handsome and after i fuck you and you can't move for hours

Everett: You still make my heart race the way you did when I met you on our first date. You have this hold over me, Matt...one no one's had over me in a while. And knowing that you're the father of my kids, and seeing what a good father you are just turns me on even that much more. I'm nervous because I'm completely and one hundred percent in love with you, and I've never needed anyone the way I need you. You know I'm 100% independent. And then I met you, and suddenly the idea of losing you...I can't think about it.

Everett: I love it when you talk law to me. It's so sexy. I forgot being married to a lawyer can have upsides. ;)

Everett: I just wanted to get the idea out there and see how you'd feel about it. Maybe I'm thinking about it because the anniversary of losing Evie is coming up...but i just remember how much I loved being a dad to a little girl. And I think you'd love it, too.

Matt: :)

Matt: Sounds like a plan and i can give you my special dance

Matt: We can try for another child and daughter hopefully. I know i want another child in the future and i understand. I love our boys and i will like them to have a little sister

Matt: So...we can talk more about it when you get back? To be honest i am kinda surprise (in a good way) I would love to have any child with you Mr. Everett Smith-Stone

Everett: Oh god I always laugh. You're so good at it, but it's also just funny and you know I laugh when you make me nervous.

Everett: Really...? You'd be open to it? I mean, there's one major problem. You and I can't make a baby. So we'd have to look into surrogates and as a lawyer you know how much of a pain in the ass it is to do it through a company...

Matt: Sunday pancakes and morning reading will be a great tradition and a good start

Matt: I want you so badly too and am glad that you will always have me to yourself. When you get home, you can and i can't wait

Matt: Oh? I don't follow but okay. What is it you want to ask me handsome?

Everett: I agree. Once Evan is old enough to read, we can start more traditions.

Everett: When I get home tomorrow night we can have all the sex you want babe, and I’ll make it worth the wait.

Everett: I guess what I want to ask is....would you ever want another baby?

Matt: I will. I know he would love that and he loves pancakes. We should do that for the boys honestly, a Smith-Stone tradition. Growing up i never had a tradition and so i want to have one with the boys.

Matt: Sounds hot. You're turning me on right now that these boxers can not contain ;) Yes i am wearing it.

Matt: Afterwards, i will give you the night of your life that you will lose your voice screaming my name and so much pleasure.

Matt: *Sends a picture of himself with his boxers almost fully down*

Matt: I so want to fuck and suck you right now.

Everett: The only traditions I ever had were with my mom before she died or with Ellie. So I need new ones with my new family, and pancakes on Sundays with the boys sounds like the perfect Smith-Stone tradition start.

Everett: The minute I get home, I’m going to suck you off so well that you go numb. You have no idea how badly I want you. I hate this job, I need to be able to fuck my husband when I want to.

Matt: I am working on this document, reviewing it for a client which i have a meeting week later during the day. You know i hate it when you say that. You're are an amazing husband, your do all this sweet romantic stuff and your dinners are amazing

Matt: Me too. Romeo was asking when you're coming home so that you can read to him. He love it when you read to him and i know. Naomi is a great help honestly and i am trying not to stress her too much. She is planning the wedding and also has school.

Matt: What else turns you on Mr. Smith-Stone? I know something that will turn you on. I am not wearing any shirt and am laying in bed with only boxers. The ones you like and drive you crazy

Matt: Two surprises, You will enjoy both ;)

Everett: You know I’m here if you want to vent about work. But Saywer knows more about law than in depth than I do. I try to be an amazing husband...because I love you and I want to show you in every way I can what our family means to me.

Everett: In the morning tell him Daddy will read to him as soon as I get home tomorrow morning. Saturday morning reading before pancakes can become a Smith-Stone tradition if he wants. I know, we’ve put enough stress on Nomi. I hope she took the weekend off.

Everett: What else turns me on? Right now what turns me on is the thought of flipping you around and sliding into you, holding your hips while you hold onto the counter and just fucking you senseless until you’re screaming my name. I know I’m not usually the dominant one...but that’s what I want right now. You’re wearing those boxers?

Matt: It's fine handsome. I was even about to text you but you beat me to it. It's great to hear from the most amazing handsome, wonderful husband

Matt: I know. I am good and just check on the boys who are sleeping. They were really tried from the park and all the fun they had.

Matt: They were amazing and beautiful. When you get home i have a surprise for you that you will love

Everett: What are you doing up at 5am? Part of me was hoping you wouldn’t answer, as much as I’m glad I can talk to you. Oh baby, I’m definitely not the most amazing husband....but fuck, I like that you think I am.

Everett: Good. I’m glad they’re sleeping on schedule and not giving you too much trouble. You know you can call Naomi if you need her help, but you’re pretty good at handling them yourselves. It kind of turns me on, seeing how good of a dad you are...I can’t lie.

Everett: Hey sexy. I’m sorry for texting you so late...I just can’t sleep and I can’t stop thinking.

Everett: I’m also sorry that they pulled me into work last minute. It’s really pissing me off that they tell me to get on the next flight to Berlin to kick ass when I’d rather be at home cooking dinner for my hisband and my sons.

“My goodness! Unboxing while pregnant is a chore. Thank God I do yoga.” She said, having grabbed her tea.

“Trying to decorate the house in time for Christmas and I can’t even find my boxes for those!” She laughed, sipping her tea, free hand on her now large belly.

Everett wasn’t new to being a parent - or pregnancy for that matter. He remembered being sixteen and finding out Brooke was pregnant with his daughter. He had been there through most of her pregnancy, along with Evan’s mother during her’s. Now he had another son, through marriage, but Romeo was his son no matter if they were blood or not. “Yeah, it is.” He nodded, leaning over to gently take the box from her. “You need to sit down and put your feet up...if you don’t, your ankles are going to swell - and believe me, you won’t like it. Too much activity causes swelling. Swelling can lead to other issues.” He was speaking out of experience from Cynthia’s pregnancy. As he looked to her stomach, he had the thought yet again about how he wanted another baby...one with Matt now that they were married. A baby that was both his and Matt’s biologically...but biology didn’t work that way. Someone would have to carry the baby. He envied Rosina and Sawyer, they were having a baby girl. He missed his daughter every single day. “Let me help you with this while I’m here. I have experience with unpacking boxes and with pregnant women.”