And, baby, thatâs show business for you. New album The Life of a Showgirl. Out October 3 â¤ď¸âđĽ
https://taylor.lnk.to/TSTheLifeofaShowgirl
Album Producers: Max Martin, Shellback and Taylor Swift đ¸: Mert Alas & Marcus Piggott
Claire Keane
ojovivo
Peter Solarz
Keni

Kiana Khansmith

izzy's playlists!

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Jules of Nature
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romaâ

if i look back, i am lost

ellievsbear
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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art blog(derogatory)
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@eusamie
And, baby, thatâs show business for you. New album The Life of a Showgirl. Out October 3 â¤ď¸âđĽ
https://taylor.lnk.to/TSTheLifeofaShowgirl
Album Producers: Max Martin, Shellback and Taylor Swift đ¸: Mert Alas & Marcus Piggott

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I was rambling on the issue of museums and human remains and how certain populations are more likely to have their bodies put on display to be gawked at and then went "well I guess the Pompeii casts were of Europeans. there are bones in there right?" and Googled it to make sure, at which point I confirmed that yes there are bones in there, but more interestingly DNA testing revealed that a cast of an adult holding a child everyone assumed was a mother and child were, in fact, a man and a kid entirely unrelated to him. Honestly that's more moving to me. Maybe they were connected in a way other than blood, but maybe a stranger saw a child when the world was ending and thought the one thing he could do was hold them.
People who argue that it is in human nature to be cruel and ruthless, and that only the fittest should survive, any of that crap. They could not be more wrong. It is in human nature to love and to protect. Or we would not any of us fucking be here.
@radley-writes đ
I was not expecting another reason to cry today, but this did it.
Long time, no write
Hi, all. I'm sure none of you who knew about before I let this account gather dust are still here. Be cool if you were tho. Idk, I finally have an actual PC again after years of not really having one. I guess I didn't realize how much easier it is to type long form from a desktop keyboard rather than a phone or even sometimes a laptop.
I am processing a lot of feelings after this week. The 26th marks one year of me being married, after 13 years of simply being... "partners". I took this whole week off of work, thinking we would have an amazing stay-at-home anniversary moon (since we didn't really take a honeymoon after the wedding). Instead, my husband has been sick-- gallbladder issues, it turns out.
Not only has he been sick, but because we're now approaching our 40s, every time he'd put on a movie (our usual couple activity), I'd fall asleep and miss the ending of whatever we were watching. I couldn't really wake up. So I'd be asleep when he was awake, and he'd be asleep when I was a wake. I'm a first shifter, he works second. Sleeping schedules don't really align.
My mom did me a solid and got our wedding photographer to rehost the photos that I never got around to downloading. So I came up here to my PC and giggled and grinned to myself, downloading all of our awkward photos, while my husband is downstairs... playing video games. I don't think the one year married anniversary mark hits as hard for him as it does for me.
But I also might just be feeling that kind of way because he's genuinely been sick and is now coping with the possibility of having major surgery. Meanwhile, it's overshadowed my own health issues. I had a major ear infection right at the start of January and the hearing in my right ear hasn't recovered to its usual levels. I finally go into an ENT who said there's no additional draining or wax build up, so there's a chance I just hear at this level (or worse) for the rest of my life now. I'm no stranger to deafness. I've been hard of hearing my whole life. But trying to process a loss of sensory input is... weirdly difficult.
It also means I don't really have a choice but to finally capitulate and get hearing aids. I've worn them before, but once they broke when I was 19, I stopped wearing them as I had no insurance to fix them. I found I actually preferred to go without, even with awkward moments. My hearing has slowly gotten worse-- which my audiogram demonstrated in no uncertain terms. I rely on spoken word interactions for my job, so if I want to remain productive, this is the route to take.
But wearing aids carries its own complications, emotional and real world. There will be an expectation that I am "fixed", which couldn't be further from the truth. I dread having to wear them for hours and hours at a time, which makes my ears sore and overstimulates me easily. I already get overstimulated with the noises I do hear, can't imagine having that much access to the little sounds again. Bus brakes, people chewing, the overwhelming hum of electricity, people clicking their pens.
Gosh, this has become a long form personal essay, to the void, more or less. I'll end it here, though I have so much more to say. Who knows if I'll be back.
May the future have a place for me, Molly
âThen give white people some free advice.â âTheyâre all in my books.â RIP Toni Morrison (February 18, 1931 - August 5, 2019)
Palestinian lady collects gas bombs fired by Israeli army. She grows flowers in these bombs.
What the AP photo story neglected to show was that this garden is in memory of Bassem Abu Rahmah, killed by Israeli forces with a tear gas to the chest in 2009 in Bilâin. The garden was planted and is maintained by Bassemâs mother.

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The US Presidential election is incredible, how often does a real life tragedy get comic relief?
As always, into the ether, into the void, I wish you were a better man. All the parts of you that gave me good memories and adventures, I miss them. If only you hadn't been so callous and cruel. Maybe we could have stayed friends. But I'll spend the rest of our lives, hackles up. At every meeting, I'll be watching my back. You are forever etched into my flesh, and I hope not a single iota of me is in you. If onlys and should'ves are some of my oldest and steadiest companions. But at least they're not you.
I miss you. I detest you. I can't wait for the day you die. I dread the funeral. I wish you were ashes in my veins, instead of a specter inside my head. And I'll keep living, one heart beat after the other, until I don't. And then I'll be free.
Being a natural night owl in a house of natural night owls that has a job that means I can't be a night owl is the worst. What do you mean it's 3 pm and I'm dry heaving so hard that tears are streaming down my face and none of my house hold is awake to check on me?
What do you dip your chicken nuggies in?
Ketchup
Mayonnaise
Honey Mustard
Sriracha
Mustard
Hot sauce
Marinara
It depends on the nuggies
Nothing
Mixture/Other (tell me in the tags!)
For myself, it depends on where the nuggies are from. Most I dip in ketchup, but sometimes I'll use mayo, or the nuggies are good enough to not need dipping sauce.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Since I stopped posting as frequently, I've really fallen deep into the Swiftie fandom. I've also recently seen Quantumania. I'll probably come back and add to this later, but I present to you, Quantumania without context, Taylor Swift Edition.
The Midnight Club - Season Two
I'm very disappointed that Netflix has decided not to pursue a second season of THE MIDNIGHT CLUB.
My biggest disappointment is that we left so many story threads open, holding them back for the hypothetical second season, which is always a gamble.
So I'm writing this blog as our official second season, so you can know what might have been, learn the fates of your favorite characters, and know the answers to those dangling story threads from the first season.
So for those of you who want to know what we were planning to do, here's a look at what would have been season 2!
AMESH Season 2 would open with Amesh, his glioblastoma advancing quickly. He would tell the first story of the season, but would be struggling to make it through. We'd focus on his love story with Natsuki for those first few episodes as it becomes clear that Amesh's death is imminent.
Meanwhile, Ilonka is trying to reconcile how she was fooled by Julia Jayne, all while falling further in love with Kevin, and she realizes he may be fading faster than he lets on.
Ilonka begins a serialized story in an effort to encourage him to "stay alive a little longer," like he did in season one. And the story she tells is... REMEMBER ME.
This was the thing I was most excited about for this season.
REMEMBER ME is one of my all-time favorite Pike books - it tells the story of a teenage girl who is pushed off a balcony, and awakens as a ghost. She has to navigate being a spirit while trying to solve her own murder. We would have stretched this story out over 5 episodes. We were going to use it as a vehicle for Ilonka to try to come to terms with the fact that she is going to die, and to begin to trying to wrap her head around being a ghost... but this is the coolest part... the lead character of Ilonka's story wouldn't be played by Ilonka. She'd be played by...
Anya.
Because this is how we live on, isn't it? In the minds of those we leave behind. And Ilonka would use REMEMBER ME as a way to imagine her dear friend Anya, waking up as a ghost, navigating the afterlife. And this sets up one of the best mechanisms of the show - even if a character dies, as long as they're remembered by members of the club, they live on in their stories.
As the story starts to pick up steam, though, the group will have to deal with the death of Amesh, which he greets with grace and bravery.
In his final moments, he sees someone in his room - the Janitor from the first season, as played by Robert Longstreet, who says comforting things to Amesh even though he can't respond.
In his final, final moments, the SHADOW descends upon Amesh, and he is engulfed into it, which reinforces the idea that the Shadow is DEATH...
With Amesh's death comes something that upends the entire thing: a NEW PATIENT. We didn't work out too much about who this would be, but it would be a new roommate for Ilonka. Someone taking Anya's old bed. Ilonka would find herself being initially cold to her - just as Anya was when Ilonka arrived. Even feeling like this new girl shouldn't necessarily be ushered into the Club. But of course they would develop a beautiful friendship over the course of the season. The new girl joins the club, where something else exciting is happening - Cheri is telling a story. We hadn't decided which one, but I think it might have been MONSTER.
Natsuki would be the next to die, which would be heartbreaking. And again, she would talk to the janitor just before it happened... and again, the Shadow would come in the final moments.
For Spence, though, things would take a different turn.
The advancements in HIV treatment in the late 90's would come into play, and we'd see his prognosis change. The HIV cocktail came out in Dec 1995, and we really wanted to explore that.
Spence would ride the swell of antiviral advancements, and by the end of the season, he'd no longer be classified as terminal. In the finale of season 2, Spence would leave Brightcliffe just like Sandra did in Season 1, heading off to manage his disease and live the rest of his life.
But onto the BIG MYSTERIES of the season one... here are some answers: What is up with Dr. Stanton's tattoo and bald head? Well, a few things. First, Dr. Stanton is actually the daughter of the original Paragon cult leader, Aceso. Her nickname was Athena, she wrote the Paragon journal that Ilonka found in S1. She turned on her mother and helped the kids escape, but because she was part of the cult in her teenage years, she had the tattoo.
It was her initials that Ilonka found carved into the tree in season 1 (her maiden name was Georgina Ballard, hence the G.B. that Ilonka finds carved in the tree).
She hated what her mother became, and the atrocities of the cult. She reclaimed the property after her mom was gone, and wanted to change it into a place that celebrated life. She was trying to undo her mother's legacy and leave something behind that was beautiful. She is wearing a wig at the end of S1 not because of a sinister reason, but because she is undergoing chemo. Dr. Stanton has cancer. Having helped so many people deal with disease, she now has to deal with it herself.
Her treatment would be successful, and she'd go into remission, but having to face that - while caring for the terminal kids at Brightcliffe - was going to be a very introspective arc for Stanton.
What about the Living Shadow? It's Death, right? Well... no.
At the end of the season, Kevin will die... followed shortly by Ilonka. And as she is dying, two things will happen. First, she'll find herself talking to the Janitor, played by Robert Longstreet... and she'll make a discovery.
HE is Death. And nothing to be afraid of. It turns out no one else ever saw this character. Stanton has a cleaning service, and the Nurse practitioners make up the rooms - the only people who ever saw this mysterious Janitor were the patients. He is Death, and offers them kind words before they die. Then what was the Shadow?
This is an idea we take directly from the book REMEMBER ME, and we'll see it play out in the final moments of Ilona's final tale. In Pike's book, Shari is pursued by a dark entity called The Shadow. When it finally catches her, though, it turns out it is not a bad thing at all.
The Shadow is THEMSELVES. It's the Unknown. As it engulfs someone, in the last moment of their life, it takes them through a place of understanding and catharsis, preparing them for the next step.
THIS is what happened to Anya in S1 when the Shadow finally reached her - that's why she fantasized a life beyond Brightcliffe, which ultimately let her find acceptance of her death. It looks different for everybody, depending on their mind-set - because it is simply an extension of themselves.
The Shadow is just the final catharsis, a return to our original form - it is a moment of true understanding, and once we experience it, we move on to the next place.
We see the Shadow in full effect when it finally comes for Kevin. KEVIN DIES with Ilonka at his side, and it leads to the biggest reveal of the season:
Who were the Mirror Man and the Cataract Woman?
They were Stanley Oscar Freelan and his wife, who built Brightcliffe (fun trivia, he is named after the real-life Freelan Oscar Stanley, who built my favorite hotel in America - the Stanley Hotel. The Stanley is also the inspiration for THE SHINING!).
But more than that... there's a reason that Ilonka only sees Stanley in the mirror, and sees the Cataract Woman whenever she looked at Kevin. This is something else we took from Pike's original book... these aren't ghosts, but glimpses of PAST LIVES.
Ilonka WAS Stanley Oscar Freelan, and Kevin WAS his wife. They've lived many lives this way, and are true SOUL MATES - they always find each other, and they always fall in love. In this life, they knew it would be a short one, so they agreed to find each other in the house they built. They've been "remembering" who they are, and glimpsing their former selves in reflections, and sometimes when they look at each other. This is also why Ilonka's very first words to Kevin in S1 were "Do I know you?" and why Kevin thought she was familiar as well. They are two souls who always find each other, again and again.
The story is this: Stanley was dying, and built this cliffside home hoping that the seaside air would help him. It did, and he far outlived his prognosis (this is also true of the real-life Freelan Stanley). However, his wife began to succumb to dementia.
She would wander the halls, looking for him ("Darling!") and would even forget to feed herself ("I'm starving...") and she eventually refused to leave the basement. Heartbroken for her, Stanley painted the walls to resemble the woodland view, and the ceiling to resemble the night sky, so that it would be a little more beautiful for her.
He also painted a labyrinth on the floor, which was a technique used to try to curb the effects of dementia. She'd walk the pattern of the maze and it was believed it could help her cognition. Eventually, she developed frightening cataracts, but Stanley loved her through it all.
They were soul mates.
So while they seemed scary in season 1, that was just how Ilonka and Kevin's mind were trying to remember their pasts. We even had their faces distorting in ways consistent with how memories degrade over time. When the Shadow comes for Ilonka, and gives her this understanding - this "remembering" - she realizes she has nothing to fear. She and Kevin will shed these personas and be reborn, and have the joy of finding each other another way. The Shadow comes for her, Death takes her gently, and Ilonka goes off with Kevin back into the cosmos, ready for their next incarnation. The series would end with Cheri telling this story to a whole new table of patients, including our new series leads. Most of our original cast now would exist as stories, a story told to the next "class" of storytellers at the table, all of whom we will have met by the end of the season. A story called "The Midnight Club."
Well, that's it... that was what we had in mind. It's a shame we won't get to make it, but it would be a bigger shame if you guys simply had to live with the unanswered questions and the cliffhanger ending. I loved making this show, and I am so proud of the cast and crew. Particularly our cast, who attacked this story with incredible spirit and bravery each and every day.
But for now, we'll put the fire out, and leave the library dark and quiet. To those before, and to those after. To us now, and to those beyond.
Seen or unseen, here but not here.
I'll always be grateful that I got to be part of this Club.
challenge for designers of âcreative menorahsâ: make it kosher
For those wondering all the candles, except the helper, should be level.
In the above picture is a creative kosher design. The helper candle, used to light the others, would be placed on on the raised head & the others would be place level along the back.
âThe Wizâ Sets 2024 Broadway Return With New Material By Amber Ruffin
The beloved musical The Wiz will return to Broadway next season in an âentirely reimagined revivalâ directed by Schele Williams and featuring additional material by Amber Ruffin.
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Real talk, the scariest thing about WWIII is knowing most of my family lives near big important cities and my brother with cerebral palsy may can't just run if things get bad. But if I approach my family with emergency plans as a just in case scenario, I'm over reacting.

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Today is the kinda day where other people's happiness stabs my soul with a knife. Stood in Target in the "birthday for him" section and tried hard not to cry looking at all those cards for the husband. Found two acceptable ones, then headed elsewhere. Spied a father with his young kids. He leaned down and kissed one of his sons on the head.
And I'm happy they're happy but I want to dissolve into sea foam because instead I got none of the future I hoped for and none of the devotion I needed and I'm too fucking weak to leave a relationship as it burns down around me. Meantime, he's oblivious
Hands down the best cure for being horny?
Get food poisoning.