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@eunicemonroy

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The Pikes returned to Canada after 10 years of living in San Jose. Hayden and Shane get back to play for Montreal and Arthur is having a hard time adapting. Might be a little bit messy. #shayden #shanehollander #haydenpike
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Shane and Ilya will often ask each other to explain little cultural things. For Ilya, it’s the odd English word or Canadian phrase. For Shane, it’s translation of Russian media or a pop culture reference.
So when they’re lying in bed one day after a long evening practice, scrolling on their phones, Shane turns towards Ilya and asks, “what’s a ‘slavic stare’?”
“What?”
Shane turned his phone screen towards his husband. It’s a list of ‘Top 10 Athletes with Best Slavic Stare’.
“I am only number four?” Ilya frowned.
“What is it?” Shane pressed.
“Is this,” Ilya tossed his phone aside and rolled over on top of his husband. He had himself propped up on his hands, strong arms bracketing Shane’s head.
Shane looked confused at first. Ilya closed his eyes and set his features. When he opened his eyes, they were gazing up at Shane, chin tilted down. His jaw was set tight with a hard line at his brow. All playfulness had fled his features.
It was the same expression Shane had seen during important games. Games where Ilya wasn’t just trying to win, he was trying to destroy the other team.
“Ilya?” Shane breathed.
But Ilya just stared. It was intense, focused, like his world narrowed down to a single task.
It felt like… how Shane imagined a rabbit would feel caught in the eyes of a wolf.
“Ilya, stop it,” Shane wiggled, hands on Ilya’s chest to push him off. The fact he used about 10% of his strength to do this meant nothing.
Ilya grabbed both of his hands in one of his and pinned them above his head.
He said something in Russian that Shane only caught fragments of. His voice was deeper like it got when he spoke his native language. Shane got “you” “wanted” “good boy” and “me” but it was enough for him to vaguely catch onto the meaning.
“Ilya, I’m…,” Shane whined and unsuccessfully tried to yank his hands back. “I’m tired. I just wanted an…explanation.”
“But you are hands-on learner,” Ilya said in English but with a thick accent, not dropping the stare.
Shane squeezed his eyes close as Ilya dipped to capture his prey.
Fuck.
Ilya has surgery on his shoulder in the off season. The surgery is considered a minor one and everything goes well. He walks up from surgery high as a kite but otherwise fine. Yuna, David, and Shane are talking to Ilya when a nurse walks in. The nurse explains he’s here to examine the small incision and check the stitches but when he tries to pull down the hospital gown, Ilya freaks out and tells him no. “I’m married!” He slurs out. “Happily married!” They try to explain that the nurse is just doing his job but Ilya isn’t having it. Only Shane can undress him so Shane peels back the gown enough for the nurse to look at the stitches. Shane apologizes for Ilya’s outburst but the nurse shrugs them off and says it was actually kind of cute.
Ilya throws Shane a surprise birthday dinner. Only he doesn't actually tell any of their friends that it's Shane's surprise birthday dinner, they all just think it's a regular dinner party. When dinner is served, Ilya stands up, as though to make a toast and says "it's Shane's birthday! Surprise!" (It's not, Shane's birthday is in a few days but it wouldn't be much of a surprise if it was on the actual day).
Cue everyone freaking out because they didn't actually bring a gift and Shane just looking vaguely confused but definitely entertained. Then Ilya reveals a pile of presents he's bought for Shane and tells everyone to pick one out and give to Shane. This idea came about because Shane always complains about birthday presents being thoughtful but ultimately useless because, being a multi-millionaire, anything he wants he could just go out and buy so Ilya's bought him a bunch of stuff he knows Shane will like but that he'd never buy for himself and all of their friends get to be just as surprised as Shane by what "they" have gifted him.

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fixed it.
Post TLG, Shane has a rare completely off night. He was awful and he knows it. When they get back to the locker room after the loss, Shane goes to apologize to the team. Before he can start, the team just pushes him out of the way and surrounds Ilya. They’re like “Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you? What’s your problem?” and Ilya is so confused as to why they’re upset with him because he played well despite losing. Someone is like “Cap, it’s your job to put out and you clearly haven’t been and that’s why Shane is playing like shit, so why are you not giving it up?”. Someone else explains that they figured out a while ago that Shane plays like a God when he’s getting laid regularly, and goes back to being a normal human when not, so they need to know why Ilya isn’t bending over and giving it up. They start assuming that something is medically wrong and Bood is like “Well if Ilya can’t take it then someone on the team has to step up” and Luca is immediately like “I’ll let Shane fuck me…I mean for the sake of team and everything…if I must…I’m not actually eager or anything…like I haven’t thought about this at all…ever!” Ilya starts yelling at the team, telling them that everything is fine, but they yell back and now everyone is arguing. Meanwhile, Shane is very amused by the fact that the team thinks he’s the top.
baby boy, honeybee 🍯 shane and baby niko ♡
Someone asking Luca after Shane's first season as AC on the Centaurs: "So, is it difficult with basically three captains, especially if two of them are married that must be hard to get used to.
And Luca and the other rookies being like, oh you mean the Dad-Trifecta? it's the best thing that has ever happened to us.
You loose your skates or you need help with paperwork or you're just feeling kinda sad and need a dad hug - you go Bood. he will grill you some chicken and go speak to Coach for you. You call him or Cassie if you're sick and they will pick you up and deposit you on the floor with Milo and you are their baby now. I'm 23 years old but that's my dad tho
If you're having trouble with other players, or if you're in like, a crisis? Mama Bear Ilya, will 100% get arrested for any of us and/or pick you up from the middle of nowhere any time of night. You wanna ragebait other players? He has the perception of a God and can tell from one look when a players second wife will leave him. He can also tell when you're feeling like shit mentally and he will pick you up take you to Harris farm and make you dog walk with him while throwing sweets at you. Holmberg got high sticked the other week Ilya spent like, 2 hours going through the guys Instagram with us while wine drunk and ripping his entire life to pieces with us.
and Shane? He will come early to practice for you, he will tell me things wrong with my playing I didn't know EXISTED. Boyle was in a slump Hollander turned up at our house with a fucking smoothie get your ass out of bed we're going to the rink and he will completely pull apart your playing style with such precision that's it's beautiful to watch and I'm not even mad about it. Roz will be giving a fucking captains speech about how we can do better next week and he'll fucking pipe up in the corner going, well we will if Lapointe improves his footwork Coach, we're gonna be staying late on Saturday and Wiebe is like, sounds good Hollander like COACH you can't Agree For Me and he'll just go, Shane Hollander is giving you a private lesson I don't care what you're doing cancel it
JJ: would you like to play “Jackie or Shane” a game where I tell you a real quote I have heard Hayden Pike say, and you have to guess whether he was talking about his wife or his best friend?
Ilya: …. Let’s do this

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Walk with me here.
Ilya and Jackie have an ongoing text thread that’s just links and screenshots of Shayden fanfic with comments like “This is exactly how I’d describe that face Hayden makes when Shane’s talking about something he doesn’t understand,” or “Hayden literally said this about Shane last week.”
Shane at a presser: Yeah our guys are really working hard, tonight's game was--
Arthur Pike, sitting in Hayden's lap at the next microphone, shouting: HELLO SHANE HOLLANDER
Shane: Ha, um--tonight's game was tough but we're hungry for it--
Arthur Pike, struggling out of his father's grasp: SHANE! SHANE! SHANE!
Shane, whispering: Okay, okay.
Hayden Pike, leaning into the microphone once Arthur is happily slung between both their laps: He, uh, really likes Shane.
This is the cutest thing ever!!
Post TLG Shane and Ilya have to stay with Yuna and David for a few days because the repairs to the cottage weren’t finished by the time the season ended. The first night, Shane tries to initiate sex but Ilya shuts him down. Shane is worried that something is wrong but Ilya is like “You’re too loud, they’ll hear” and Shane spends the next 10 minutes trying to convince Ilya he’ll be quiet (“I’ll be quiet. I’ll suck on your fingers to keep quiet, Ilya.”). Meanwhile, down the hall, Yuna and David are having the exact same argument (“No, David. You’ve been so loud since Shane moved out. The boys will hear.” “…I can’t make noise if you sit on my face.”)
There is a photo deep in the Centaurs media reel archives from a community day thing where baby Shane (7) is running away from Chuck the Beaver and being “protected” by the then-Captain of the Centaurs.
Harris finds it while combing through the archives for fun comparisons to the current team.
Instantly posts it with a picture of Ilya pulling Shane away from a fight single handed, and with the photo from Shane and Scott’s post-game fight when he was a Metro.
“It only takes one Ottawa Centaur to keep national treasure Shane Hollander safe. How many Metros does it take to stop gay on gay crime???”
shanebug photo album circa '91-93

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.ninety-four #ally
So, I've been writing this Shayden fanfic, where MM writer, Shane Hollander meets lawyer Hayden Pike in a support group of family of victims of unaliving. It's actually a funny fanfic because they try to make their life better by joking and having a good time as friends.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/84676441/chapters/223432761