beatles fans will look you dead in the eye and tell you that their favourite beatles member was The Guy Who Bought Paul Mccartney a Sandwich Back in '63 and that their favourite beatles song is a 12 minute unreleased tape of brian epstein dying that can only be heard if you take lsd and contact george harrison via ouija board and ask him to put you through to hare krishna who then passes the message on to john lennon who beams the tape into your head but only when his glasses start glowing and so you have to buy him a new pair each time you listen to it.

if you're queer, your teenage 'lovelife' will either sound like Reel Around the Fountain or like Last Night Dreamt that Somebody Loved Me and there's no in between.

freebleeding this march to strengthen my bond with julius caesar

if john fitzgerald kennedy hadnt been wearing a corset that day, he'd have been able to dodge the second bullet. let that be a lesson to all you faggots out there.

I KILLED JOHN F KENNEDY. (but not because he was bisexual or anything. im cool with the gays im an ally.) but I SHOT JFK and i'd do it AGAIN. (again, not because of the bisexual thing. and it wasnt because hes a catholic either im chill with the catholics. and the bisexuals)

Henry Winter tries to kill Bunny using poisoning techniques from the ancient Persians. Henry Winter didn't know about the moon landing. Henry Winter wrote about murdering someone in his diary and bunny found it. Henry Winter was worrying about which book he should carry to make him look more innocent when the FBI didn't care about that and were starting to suspect him for just being an odd character. Henry Winter is ridiculous! But because he has an understanding of classical greek, Richard and the others idolise him and view him as a God; incapable of ever being wrong. And so they go along with his plans and trust he will lead them to safety and all too late they realise that he really has no idea what he's doing. Charles realises it. But by then there is no reversing the damage that has already been done and Henry takes his life in a final attempt to cling on to his blind obsession and have the dramatic end of the hero in a greek tragedy. And the spell has broken for the others, they see they cannot live in a work of classical greek literature, and they go on living their very ordinary lives.

As a little girl I had a sudden vision of being executed by guillotine in front of a crowd of cheering frenchmen and from then on I've felt soul tied to a miserable incompetent little failure loser frenchman that accidentally screwed up in the french revolution and was guillotined despite not even being a member of the french aristocracy. And now whenever I feel like a loser I just think "this is how jean-pierre must have felt. before the execution." and it makes me feel better.

johnny marr encouraging marrissey rumours knowing full well he's got a whole wife at home like "I guess you could say me and morrissey were.. Hand In Glove 👀 👀 👀"

The reason why mr beasts eyes are so empty is because he’s secretly watching vore on his neuralink. Wake up people!!