My Journey into Art

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CARRD

This is a side blog of EstravenAi specifically created to document my journey into art. I am starting basically from scratch and learning how to create and be artistic. First step is drawing. 

I’ve decided to try to learn to draw for a number of reasons. One big reason is because it accesses the right brain and I am very left brained.  So much so that I have trouble accessing and identifying/expressing emotions. I believe creating something artistic will help me to do that. It is also just something I’ve wanted to learn since I was a kid, but never did. 

I’ll post pictures of the art I’m making on here and hopefully you’ll be able to see improvements over time. 

I wanna talk about Bruno.

Martin from The Magnus Archives

Beautiful fat beach babe. I know it is December. Let me have my fat beach babe!

I’m moving and next week is my last appointment with my therapist. She asked me to draw what therapy was to me, so I drew this. Often my mind feels like a vault with several locked cages.  Behind those doors are monsters--traumas, disorders, self-destructive coping skills, and more. I try to keep them locked, but sometimes a monster will escape and hunt me down. 

Therapy has given me the armor and training I need to fight the monsters. Therapy doesn’t eliminate the monsters. You have to do that yourself. But therapy gives you the tools you need to fight. I have even been able to purposefully open a couple of cages to fight the monsters there through EMDR. 

I still have a lot of monsters to face, but I know that if I continue training and wearing my armor, I will be able to do it. 

I recommend therapy to everyone. Everyone has a monster or two, even if they don’t seem as scary as other people’s monsters. Therapy works slowly, just like training to fight, so you’ve got to give it a chance. But you also have to put the work in to get results. You can’t sit passively by and expect to learn how to fight. You have to participate. Do things that feel uncomfortable. Push your limits. And when you finally defeat one of your monsters, all that work pays off.

We are lucky enough to have access to cheaper therapy, even if you live in a rural place, though things like online therapy with sliding scales. If I could give one piece of advice to everyone, it would be to go to therapy. I know it is difficult to find the right therapist, believe me. But it is totally worth the effort.

Best girl!

Stylized portrait of my dogs, Bunny and Angel.

Mushroom Fairy.

Capybara are cool. So are cats.

My favorite drug.