✨Eri✨

Getting into a KarAkciddent and splashing 3 cups of FükkenScälden all over myself

Someone is eating a fresh orange in this McDonald's. I smelled it and my head snapped up like a hunting dog. That smell doesn't belong in this wicked place

the thing about lancelot is that he IS first and foremost merlin's knight. he's mr. "your secret's safe with me." mr. "oh merlin you need to get to the cup of life? awesome i'm coming with you." mr. "i made a vow to gwen to keep arthur safe but merlin got hit by the dorocha so i am immediately going to abandon both the mission and my vow in order to look after him for however long he needs me. obviously" and it's really funny because nobody expects it from him. the difference between him and gwaine (also merlin's knight) is that he's quiet about it so nobody ever fucking suspects him. if arthur ever gave him an order he'd be like yeah sure alright and do it BUT if merlin pulled him aside to ask him if he would go against the order to cover for him saving the day (as usual) lancelot would be like "Say No More <3" and kronk wrong lever arthur into a pit on purpose. and then he would throw himself into the pit as well like "oh my god sire i am SO SORRY </333 i must've pulled the wrong lever or the rigging was messed up or something </333333 please my lord you have my utmost apologies and you can execute me for my foolishness if you want :((((" and arthur would take one look at his sad little face and be like No lancelot it's not your fault.....You are The Best knight i have and i trust you Completely....that lever must've been Tampered with...with Sorcery.... and merlin saves the day in the background and then he and lancelot go out drinking that night to celebrate

had a fucked up dream i had a book that turned out could never be read again the same as the first time because each reread the characters became incrementally more aware that the events of the book had happened before and they were “reliving” it and i reread enough times that they became self aware, figured out they were in a book, acknowledged me as the reader, and some lost their minds or had existential crises, became violent to other characters or themselves, some begged me to never stop reading or they ceased to exist and others begged me to end it all stop reading and keeping them trapped in the endless loop of torment, and the literal only way to get the book back to its first run was to hand it off to someone else to read for the first time and for some reason i physically couldn’t tell anyone about it so i’d have to just hope whoever i gave it to would only read it once and i could never open the book again to check if they were okay and back to normal because i was terrified of fucking them all up again :(

i just apolitically killed the king like i have no agenda or whatever im just the jester here but i stabbed him anyway LOL all the courtiers and advisors are trying really hard to figure out who did it LOL all of them wanted him dead but they dont know whose scheme it was so nobody can promulgate a coherent political maneuver based on the circumstances LOL just playing my lute #MyLute

petition to bring back saying "huzzah!" when something goes your way and "alas." when it doesn't