𝐈 𝐀𝐌 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐄𝐍𝐃.

DEFENSIVENESS:   arms crossed / crossing legs / clenched fists / pointing index finger / stiff shoulders / tense posture / curling of lip / baring of teeth / tail lashing / pinned ears.

REFLECTIVE:   hand to face gestures / head tilted / stroking chin / peering over glasses / taking glasses off — cleaning / putting earpiece of glasses in mouth / pipe smoker gestures / putting hand to the bridge of nose / pursed lips / knitted brows / arms crossed / hat tipping.

SUSPICION:   arms crossed / sideways glance / touching or rubbing nose / rubbing eyes / hands resting on weapon / brows rising or knitting together / lips pressing into a thin line / strict unwavering eye contact / wrinkling of nose / eyes narrowing.

OPENNESS & COOPERATION:  open hands / upper body in sprinters position / sitting on the edge of a chair / hand-to-face gestures / unbuttoned coat / tilted head / slacked shoulders / relaxed posture / feet pointed outward / palms flat and facing outward.

CONFIDENCE:   hands behind back / hands on lapels of coat / steeped hands / smirking / baring teeth in a grin / rolling shoulders / tipping head back but maintaining eye contact / chest puffed up / shoulders back / arms folded just above navel.

INSECURITY & ANXIETY:   chewing pen or pencil / rubbing thumb over opposite thumb / biting fingernails / hands in pockets / elbow bent / closed gestures / clearing throat / “ whew ” sound / picking or pinching flesh / fidgeting in chair / hand covering mouth whilst speaking / poor eye contact / tugging pants or clothes/ jingling money in pockets / tugging at ear / perspiring hands / playing with hair / swaying / playing with a writing implement / smacking lips / sighing / rocking on balls of feet / flexing / tapping fingers sporadically / chewing on lip / pacing / tail twitching.

ANGER & FRUSTRATION:   short breaths / “tsk” sounds / tightly-clenched hands / fist-like gestures / pointing index finger / rubbing hand through hair / rubbing back of neck / snarling / revealing teeth / grimacing / sharp-eyed glowers / notable tension in brow / shoulders back, head up; defensive posturing / clenching of jaw / grinding teeth / nostrils flaring / heavy exhales / swearing / tail lashing  / pinned ears.

on: zero is not a mary sue.

"the same mistakes, the same ends. again and again. what should i... what could i have done?"

@unmeiha: ❛ you have never done this before ,  have you ? ❜ — morbid curiosity.

used to being the quiet observer, the voidsent's first instinct was to slip away upon feeling that they were intruding upon a private moment. but instead, zero received an invitation to join koharu... " no, i haven't. " she had never danced for the sake of it; the only thing akin to the artform is the fluid motions in which her body twists & allows her scythe to swing through the air. " so don't let me hold you back. "

and it's a little awkward at first; they felt far too stiff — limbs akin to yawning branches next to the graceful au ra. they bump into each other more than once, of course; and it's brushed off with a smile, or pleasant laughter like wind chimes. a smile tugs at their cheeks, too.

ANIMAL: wolves, crows.

COLOR(S): cyan, black.

MONTH: december.

SONGS: soldier, hometown, human, bad dream, heroes fall.

NUMBER: ...0, 13.

DAY OR NIGHT: dawn or twilight.

PLANTS: poppy, spider lily & lilies in general - death, mourning, peace, rebirth.

SMELL: worn leather, petrichor.

GEMSTONE: obsidian, quartz.

SEASON: winter.

PLACE: the thirteenth.

FOOD: apples, but also hot & spicy meals.

ELEMENT: ice. stoic & stalwart, yet able to melt and become water; adaptable.

DRINK: either black coffee, or sugary drinks - again, something with strong flavours.

on: aether intake & food.

prior to coming to the source, zero had pretty poor eating habits - gong weeks wihout intaking aether. given that she is more of a human than other voidsent, zero doesn't necessarily require aether as much as she otherwise would if she were fully turned by the flood of darkness. not consuming aether does leave them weaker, and would of course eventually be enough to result in starvation.

given the nature of the thirteenth, her aether would coalesce together to reform her and deny permanent rest. however, due to the danger of being devoured prior to being 'resurrected,' there is little to gain from allowing oneself to starve for overly long periods of time.

while staying in the aether rich home of the warrior of light and their compatriots, zero does not need to feed nearly as frequently as they otherwise need to. the ambient aether of etheirys is enough to allow extended periods without directly eating anything. hoever, after spending some time in radz-at-han & later in garlemald, she has grown to tolerate, and later grows to enjoy being offered food & sharing it with others.

zero's thoughts on zenos, and on the warrior of light in relation to zenos.

being part voidsent & having experienced death and rebirth many times, how they feel about that and the struggles along the way with regards to the apparent difficulty of retaining one's form.

relationship with food and hunger.

being able to sense the presence of others via aether, like an infrared camera.

@reapcrbunny: < care to join me for a bit ? > she's offering food. a snack uwu — morbid curiosity.

they hesitated for a moment before taking a seat next to dahlia. " you do not need to provide sustenance while i'm here, the ambient aether of your world is quite sufficient. " zero murmured. the partaking of food in a shared space is a human custom, as she's witnessed around radz-at-han ( or slowly remembered from an age long past — could be either, really ).

@abystal: we can help each other ,  right ? — morbid curiosity.

in front of the strange troupe of mortals, he showed little indication of his silent relief. but to walk with one's own two legs, feeling every breath enter & exit familiar lungs — its not a sensation they would easily understand. and it is only when it splits away, silent as a shadow, when zero began to examine. arms, hands, fingers, legs... methodically feeling and flexing his limbs. but zero soon sensed an approaching presence, and so pauses.

steel grey meets dancing magenta, calculations & cautions are exchanged in a blink of an eye. zero is first to glance away, shirking the sensation of being observed by human eyes. ( the only varieties of gaze it grew accustomed to are ones of hunger or reverence, of dominance or submission in this animalistic social hierarchy. but mortals are... complicated. )

" that is the contract we have agreed upon already, is it not? if you seek further aid from me than what has already been exchanged, you ought to have aether you may spare. "