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We regret to inform you that the sunshine and friendship app is actually a children killing app.

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@epicmurdock
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We regret to inform you that the sunshine and friendship app is actually a children killing app.

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This tweet read me to filth
what nobody tells you about weekends is that it’s already monday
sometimes being a fan of something means not wanting them to make any more of it
Adam: Your older brother. Abel. He's dead.
Adams third child, Seth: What is that?
Adam: I don't know. This is new for me too.
Eve: I think "dead" is what happens to dinnerbeasts.
Seth:
Eve: We might have to dinner him.

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i need everyone to get into college football right now i am dying to talk about the texas tech situation. this is the kind of thing that will be referenced for the next 100 years. there will be documentaries and biopics about this.
no one asked but here
texas tech's quartback, brendan sorsby, was investigated for sports gambling. i know sports betting is all the rage right now, but athletes themselves are not allowed to do it. it is Rule Number 1 and it is the highest priority rule for the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA), who governs all athletic programs at about 1,100 colleges in the US.
the invesitagetion of sorsby revealed that, not only did he place more than 9,000 sports bets when he himself was a collegiate athlete, but 40 of those bets were AGAINST HIS OWN TEAM when he was playing at indiana university. immediately, this threatens the integrity of the sport, and especially because indiana is the hottest team right now as the defending national champion.
the NCAA, which is largely a sham organization these days (they've truly lost their grasp and college athletics are the wild west now) actually enforced their Number 1 Rule and told sorsby his career is over, that he would never play college football again (and, subsequently, that he would never get drafted into the NFL because his college career was cut short).
well, because the NCAA is a husk of its former self, sorsby and texad tech immediately took this to court. MANY athletes have learned these past few seasons that if you can find a judge who's a fan of your team, you can get any NCAA ruling overturned. that's exactly what texas tech did. they filed a suit in Lubbock, where the university is located and where every judge is an alum of texas tech. so sorsby was granted an injunction and will now only be suspended for the first 2 games od the 2026 season (which are alwayd against no-name teams that will be destroyed regardless of who's suspended).
every other school in the country immediately went on the defensive because this is a very clear integretiy issue. so nebraska and georgia (sic em dawgs) released statements saying that all currently-scheduled competitions witb Texas Tech in ANY sport will be canceled and there will be no future schedulings. at least 3 of the major conferences (SEC, Big 10, Big 12) , who account for almost all division 1 sports teams in the country, are also in discussions about cancelling comtests. Texas Tech is part of the Big 12, and there is serious talk of all other teams in the conference shutting texas tech out.
now would probably be time where i say that texas tech is one of the wealthiest programs in college football becaise there is a single billionaire alumnus pouring money into the program with hopes of essentially buying a championship. so texas techs integrity has always been questionable. anyway, the university president put oit a statement that he doesnt care that sorseby violated regulation and that texas tech will sue any school that refuses to play them because it jeopardizes their championship prospects if they're umable to play any games.
this is all just startomg but its so juicy and delicious. the NCAA is going to crumble to dust if they cannot get this injunction overturned. schools like georgia and nebraska have plenty of money so a suit isnt necessarily a concern, but this will absolutely change college football forever. i cant stop reading about it.
update on this: texas tech is claiming that every school who has/is considering cancelling all contests is "afraid" that texas tech is better than them. what's funny about this is that sorsby's stats are average. he is not good enough for this kind of protection. many schools who have already cancelled or are considering it have much better quarterbacks than sorsby. also, texas tech's head coach had said that it's actually ok that sorsby bet against his own team because it "its not murder or assault."
the attorney general of texas has threatened to investigate the Big 12 conference if they sanction Texas Tech
the claim is now that texas texh university just cares so much about brendan sorsbys mental health that they have to sue everyone who calls this an integrity violation. any other school who wouldnt defend an athlete that committed this violation "doesnt care about mental health"
these two memes have equal and opposite energies
ok but how could you forget this one
god you're so right. hatred, worship, and comradery. below, above, and beside. the ultimate trifecta.
🤗 i dont like this emoji. this is not a hug to me. this is someone doing condescending jazz hands in my general direction when i am in need of affection. not comforting.
🫂 i love this emoji. this is a hug. we are hugging and its nice. and as a special bonus they appear to be my old friends from the msn messenger logo? very comforting.

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my body, tearfully: when sleep???
me: my dude we just woke up!! It’s time for wakefulness and doing things and Productivity
my body, weeping: but???? when sleep?????
me: okay, finally now is sleep
my body: no. wrong.
Trace amounts of Monica in my life
A statistically insignificant level of Monica in my life
My life manufactured in a facility that also processes Monica
You guys ever see a DNI that makes you break out into laughter and almost cry
If graphic design is your passion then !!! GET OUT !!! 🚫🚫👎‼️🥶🥶🚫
not my circus not my monkeys but thanks to my mutuals i know some of the lore
OK SO this is how I showed perspective to a student that was having difficulty visualizing it
Draw the buddy
Use a transformation tool
fill it up like a baloon not forgetting some things cover others
Keep going! That way you keep your proportions right, etc
And don’t forget references for the angles

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reblog this to be an annoying faggot at ur followers
call me a patron of the ass library the way I'm checking out that butt