definitely NOT active

“...Oh.”

His words catch Naoto off guard. It isn’t that they are wrong, or inappropriate, or any of those things, but rather that she has forgotten, perhaps, what it means to be wanted. The police requested her help only to chase her away. The investigation team -- now her friends, she supposes -- disregarded her, made an attempt to welcome her in, then made as great a fool of her as anyone ever has.

...And then there was her dungeon, and everything that her shadow said and did and spewed hatefully back at her.

And now... 

     “O-oh!” Naoto whirls around to face Narukami, face flushed red, palms outstretched before her. “I’m fine.”

     She stares at him, quiet, brows furrowed and mouth open, and suddenly, she deflates, shoulders slumped and head hanging down. She is too used to tucking away her pain, shoving it down with the rest of her identity where she doesn’t have to acknowledge it. “No. Maybe not. Forgive me, senpai. I feel foolish. You and everyone else were all so brave, and I... Couldn’t.” She frowns, lifting her head and adjusting her hat so it sits straight on her head. “It feels wrong to win when all I did was run away. Somehow, it is easier to face the danger of being kidnapped than it is to show myself to the world...”

you are patroclus, from the iliad by homer, doomed by fate to be stuck in a love story that has no place on the battlefield. although you always have the best intentions, you have to realize you cannot save everyone. your unwavering loyalty means you often lose yourself in the process of putting others first. take a deep breath, remember who you are, and that you are deserving of the same love you try to put out. you are kind, you are strong, and you give and you give but it is never enough to protect those you love. in the end, it's not even enough to protect yourself.

tagged by: @sabazio thank uu

omg anon I see you going around spreading all that love 

     “W-What?” Naoto blinks, tensing up a moment before she relaxes into Nicole’s grip. “Nicole, really, you don’t have to...”

     ...Will she ever get used to the notion that she has friends who love her? Who want to spoil her? Nicole has been Naoto’s friend for months and months and months, and it is still so very hard to bring herself to accept this kindness from her.

     Breathe in. She does. Breathe out. 

     “O-oh!” Goodness, Naoto may never truly get used to the distinct... Aggression, she’ll say, that Kanji delivers his affection with. She has to take a moment to recover her breath, offering him a faint smile, then delicately lifts the lid off the box.

     When she does, she cannot help but gasp, a bright pink flush descending on her cheeks. “K-Kanji-kun,” she breathes, delicately taking the plushes out of the box and setting the container down. “They’re beautiful!” 

     She hardly knows how much time has passed before she is able to stop turning the gift around and around in her hands, but when she does, it is only to turn her wide-eyed stare to Kanji instead. “I--”

     How does she--

     How is she supposed to--

     What did she ever do to deserve such a kind friend?

     Naoto does the only thing she can think to do. She rushes forward, wraps her arms tight around Kanji, and presses her cheek tight against his chest.

     Usually, a good night’s rest would be enough for Naoto to feel, even if not-quite-rested, at least capable of tackling the coming day’s tasks.