superbat where they hate each other's civilian identities bc once they were kidnapped together and they had to come up with plans to escape that would look like an accident and not reveal their identities but they would keep trying to enact plans at the same time and unwittingly ruin the other's plan. By attempt #6 Bruce is about murder this dumb hick of a reporter who's too clumsy for his own good and Clark is trying to calm himself down by reminding himself that Bruce is just a civilian and he's not doing it on purpose and it's not his fault he's quite possibly the most idiotic, infuriating man alive.
Now every time they happen to see each other they're super passive aggressively polite to each but they can't let the other know they're being passive aggressive bc there's no outward reason for them to hate each other. It leads to situations like this:
Bruce, extremely fake smile on: Mr Kent, good to see you again. When the daily planet said they were sending someone over I thought it would be someone else. Isn’t our, uh, shared past a conflict of interest or something?
Clark, also extremely fake smile on: Wow, Mr. Wayne, I wouldn't expect you to take an interest in the ethics of a situation. Actually, I did bring up this point to my boss and he said that our shared trauma meant we "had a bond" which might allow me to get better answers.
Bruce, grinding his teeth: Well. That is certainly an interesting thought. I’ve been kidnapped so many times though, it barely registers. I’m sure I’ll do nothing but waste your time and give you unusable quotes.
Bruce: *proceeds to do nothing but waste time and give unusable quotes*
Clark: *uses all the restraint in his body not to snap his pen in half as he writes down absolute garbage*
(superman and batman are besties btw, they get along just fine)
