I Love Our Disaster Lesbian Monk and Trash Wizard

Imogen tries to steady herself and her voice.  "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Can I come in?"  Fearne is not convinced.

Imogen opens the door and looks around sheepishly.  There are still small bits of dust and feathers drifting around the room.  She realizes then, that she's not wearing her gloves, and her markings are clearly visible.  Self-conscious, she rubs her exposed forearms where the "Whitestone is for lovers" shirt doesn't cover.

Fearne steps in and glances about.  Her voice is soft and gentle.  "Do you want a hug?"

Imogen nods without looking up.

Warmth engulfs her as Fearne reaches out.  "It's ok if you miss her." Fearne smells like the outdoors, like wilderness and animals.  It reminds Imogen of Flora, and Gelvaan, and those mornings spent in the woods with Laudna, back before it felt like the world was ending.  Or maybe it did feel like the world was ending then, but for entirely different reasons, and they hadn’t known it actually was ending.

"It's…" Imogen rubs at her own neck,"it's just that I promised myself we wouldn't be apart again."

"None of this is your fault."

"But I promised her I wouldn't ever leave." Imogen thinks she might cry, and she hates herself for it.  All this power at her fingertips, and she still feels useless.  Calm emotions beckons at her, but that sounds too much like avoiding the question.  That sounds too much like cheating.  Because maybe Imogen believes she needs this pain, that she deserves this punishment.  Imogen was supposed to save the world, even if she never asked for it. Imogen was supposed to save the world so that Laudna would have time to hear all the things Imogen still had to say to her.

"We got sent away, maybe they did too.  We'll find them."

"But what if we're too late?  What if something happened, and Laudna needs us, and we're not there.  You heard what Deanna said.”  Imogen’s voice drops to a whisper.  “What if Laudna needs me?"  And she isn’t sure if the whisper is to keep the thought from Fearne or herself.  Because the next thought stays inside her own head, not daring to be spoken or broadcast.  What if I need Laudna?  See, Imogen remembers the last time Laudna was beyond the reach of her magic and what that meant.

The arms around her tighten.  “Laudna is stronger than she looks.  Orym and Ashton are too.”

Imogen sighs, nods her head.  She knows it’s true.  Laudna is the strongest person she’s ever met.

“Do you want a cookie?”  Fearne asks all of a sudden.  “FCG made them.”  And she rummages through her pouch to pull out a lone cookie.  “It’s not warm anymore, but it’s still pretty good.”

Imogen takes the treat because accepting seems easier than refusing, and eating is easier than talking.  She’s not really hungry but she bites into it anyway.

It’s a gingersnap, of course.   It’s crispy on the outside, and a little soft in the center.  Just like Imogen. Or Laudna. The surface is sweet, dusted with sugar, but there’s depths of spice hidden underneath.  And in the finish, the slightest tang of citrus.  Esteross’ recipe.  Laudna’s favorite.