TheWeirdOne :)

Hi, this is how I wrap presents for people with lower fine motor control; it could be older people, younger people, people with disabilities.

You can use ribbon you already have for wrapping present, and I measured around the item I am about to wrap leaving a little bit of room for the handle.

I taped the beginning end of the ribbon to the box and then loop back the extra ribbon to make a handle, and it should look something like this

You can wrap pretty much like you normally do as long as you make sure that the handle is exposed .

You could even tie something onto the handle for extra support

All done!

End Transcript]

the point of the riddle isn’t to figure out which one is lying, in fact, knowing which one lies and which one tells the truth is irrelevant. What you want is the correct answer from the magical beast/two guards/etc. Usually this means knowing which path to take. For that, you HAVE to ask it “if i ask the other head/guard/etc which is the safe way to go, what will they tell me?”

if you asked the truth-telling one, they’ll tell you the wrong way, because the liar will always mislead you. if you ask the liar, they’ll tell you the wrong way, because they’re misleading you, so

ALWAYS do the opposite of whatever answer you get.

“who cares this is a stupid tumblr post this doesn’t matter irl–”

WRONG AGAIN! story time:

A few years ago a friend threw a halloween party, and since he dressed as the Riddler, he decided to have a riddle contest.

now, i’ve been preparing for a riddle contest my entire life, since i first read the hobbit and it got bilbo out of trouble. for some reason, i assumed riddle contests were as inevitable as quicksand.

I answered the first riddle easily (it was one of the ones from the hobbit) and then i had to answer the next one to win a bottle of top-shelf rum. it was a variation on the two-guard riddle, only i had to choose one of two paper bags. one had crappy cheap vodka, the other the nice rum. 

the host and his friend did the classic one lies one tells the truth thing, and of course before i asked everyone started shouting “ask him what color your hair is!” and stuff like that, but i already knew what to ask, so i shushed them and won the rum

remember, kids, it doesn’t matter which one is lying and which one is telling the truth. all that matters is you get the correct knowledge to move you forward, win your rum, and make you seem like a superhuman riddle-solver to a crowd of drunken party guests.

They tell you that one of them always lies and that one of them always tells the truth. And they tell you you can ask them one question.

If you ask “What’s two plus two?” than great. You know which one lies but you also still don’t know which bridge you can cross and can’t find out.

Nor do I advocate anyone use this to defraud Amazon.

Nor do I believe that if people started doing this at Amazon retail locations it would cripple the motherfucking slavemaster bastards.

Poor folks have no choice to use it because it's the new Walmart where it's the cheapest thing around in this late stage capitalist hellscape, but exploit their shit, yo.

They treat their employees like robots, make billions off of poor people's desperation, and then don't even pay taxes?

A quick little something I knocked together, the patented tragic backstory generator ™ is the easiest way to give your character a mythically horrible origin. 

today while my teacher was out of the room i stole it and put this up in its place

my teacher laughed and asked who took it but nobody told on me so i got away with it

Maleficent worked, okay, she worked because she was a pretty mysterious character to begin with; her goals and motivations in Sleeping Beauty were vague enough that there was room for character exploration. but Cruella? 

the reason Cruella was such a fantastic and fantastically funny villain was just how BASIC she was. 

here’s Cruella: she designs clothes, she thinks a puppy-skin coat would look cool, she kidnaps a bunch of puppies because she’s rich and spoiled and used to getting her way. that’s it. that’s all there is to her. that’s all there needed to be, because a. her voice actress was god-tier b. her design and animation was flawless c. the story was pretty simple and didn’t need a villain with complex motivations and d. she shared the villainous spotlight with Jasper and Horace (who i might actually be interested in seeing a movie about tbh, just because ‘a weird old rich lady hired us to steal dogs from another rich lady and her husband and now the dogs are fighting back why is this happening where did my life go wrong’ is a fucking hilarious premise) 

my point is WHY NOT URSULA

SERIOUSLY. URSULA. 

there’s SO MUCH you could do with Ursula. not only does she have all the charisma and visual flare that Cruella does, her motivations, like Maleficent’s, were always a touch unclear. 

she fucking hates the king of the sea and it’s never really explained why. she fucks around with two monarchies seemingly for the lols. she can do magic but she lives alone in a cave with only her prisoners and her two eels for company AND she actually loves her eels and is legit sad when they die. she’s weird and mysterious and sneaky and badass and there’s just. so many cool paces you could go with her! does she have a reason to hate the king? why is she the only octopus person we see? why do people still make deals with her given that she’s made a horrifying living garden out of those who couldn’t pay up? she turned herself into a human so she’s a shapeshifter, holy fuck, is that something she’s done before?