A fountain of blood in the shape of a girl

Junior year (2000/2001), after alternative school I was released back into ‘gen pop’ aka the full run of the school, after my first semester. I started trying to be less angry, less reactive. Despite the lack of consistent therapy, I tried to practice the bits and pieces I had. Upon re-joining my classmates, I talked with kids who had previously been hurtful, and we apologized to each other…

From the time I was in 6th grade, to the time I graduated I was in love with my best friend. He knew it, I wasn’t subtle and I followed him around like a puppy because he was affectionate to me when he wasn’t being an ass. As things were, I was the ‘other girl’ in nearly every romatic relationship he’d ever have. We didn’t call it dating, but years down the line after college, he would admit to…

TW: CSA, GroomingWhen I was 16 years old, I was befriended, groomed and molested by my teacher in training. A 24 year old college student assigned to my class to shadow my English teacher, whom I still adore to this day. The teacher, not the groomer. He actually came to my 17th birthday party with his dorm mate, that’s how brazen he was. Read more: Hot for Teacher For many years since then, I…

Dear readers, I will attempt to keep this a regular thing as I have many adventures to detail, and lots of trauma to dump! However, in the last few weeks I have not been my best self, due to a combination of pain, exhaustion and processing years of childhood trauma. I have been careless with the feelings of those I love dearly, even though I only ever aim to love and support. I’m working on my…

Something totally random was on my mind the other night as I listened to the mish-mash of old and new/terrible Madonna songs that mog.com played for me as I worked. That thought was: Think of a movie Madonna was in. I bet your initial thought was not “Who’s that girl?” Why does no one ever talk about what was possibly her greatest movie outside of “A League of Their own.” I remember seeing that…

What a prize eh? Anyway. I took a long nap this afternoon and as a result just can’t seem to get to sleep. I figure it doesn’t matter too much since I don’t think I am driving home today. Neighbors are coming out of their room for a smoke. I think I’ll go be sociable for a few minutes.

Jack, Alex, Micki, Evan and Liza enjoying the party. Well, I have to say this last weekend was insane. It was so nice to see everyone who came out, we ended up having a respectable 30 or so people come out on Sunday night to the pool opener. Vodka gummies were made by Ling ling, my favorite panda. Mac and cheese was made by the lovely Suzi who stayed with us until Monday night. Other’s brought…

Guess what? Ya girl was on the radio in Pittsburgh! The show aired live 02/07/2024, but the interviewer put the video up! This was my first interview where I wasn’t asking the questions! We talk shop about the label and sample some tunes! Check it out, I kind of sound like I know what I’m doing (Goteem)! Is this something you’d like to see more of?

I re-watched the 1993 Nutcracker movie with my husband on Saturday, and it unlocked some core memories. I was not always the neon goth peacock you know and love (or at least tolerate), for a time growing up there was an attempt (that I fought at every conceivable event) to make me refined. I was neither heard nor understood in my household growing up, and even less so at school, I got into…

I haven’t really ‘advertised’ it, but I’ve been making some youtube content the last few years, I figured I should start sharing it here. Enjoy!

This website is a jumble of my talents and the blog showcases some big moments for me, but also missteps. Honestly, I am fine with all of it. Humans are imperfect beings, all we can try to do is the next right thing. I do have CPTSD from my childhood, and I’m going to talk about some of it. TW: SA, Abuse Continue reading Catharsis