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May I strive to be like this.

My favorite part about that line is that it implies that Gilderoy Lockhart was a more competent teacher than Dolores Umbridge. And that may be the biggest insult in the entire series.

Minerva left no fucking survivors with that one.

This rice tastes like plastic

You know what plastic tastes like?

I used to eat board game pieces as a kid to bring fun into my body next question

Me @ space: “what’s up with black holes” Space: “my spussy??”

this is it, the post that incurs armageddon, it was nice knowing you guys

[talking about the body i inhabit] “idk i just work here”

you’ve seen enough

This curve is next level I’m screaming.

you know how people call characters their wives/husbands/etc? well, i think i’m going to start claiming relations to fictional characters just to fuck with people. so, anyways, this one time i was out with my cousin, sonic the hedgehog, and

thanks for 10k notes, i just wanted you all to know that my cousin, sonic the hedgehog, is doing well. i told him about this post and he high-fived me