jungkookie's thighs

his storytelling rots in real time

before his own betrayed eyes

we used to be so many, so many

………….

we will kill a cow when he dies

put him inside the red earth

he will sleep inside his compound

and i might never go home again

End of Year/Films

She's been busy

This is sooo late and I gave up on trying to articulate thoughts; leaving the dashes in for the intention.

October:

Wild Mountain Thyme (2020) *6 - this was bonkers; it's just a fun project and it's so funny and absurd

Siberia (2018) *5 - low rating but not bad, I think about this kinda often

It's What's Inside (2024) 6* - probably merits a rewatch. I'm down for anything of this type

Woman of the Hour (2023) 7* (maybe a bit lower in retrospect?) - it was a really good watch but I don't feel it stayed with me enough

Scream (1996) *8 (think I upped it to 8 on this rewatch) - garners value with time, the more I come back to it, the more I love it. Still in the process of rewatching the rest, some for the first time. I think because the first is so good I always trick myself into believing I'll enjoy the rest, and I don't, not that much. But we'll keep going, for now.

Scream 2 (1997) *6 - I'm baffled by this rating but I'm not lowering it cause I don't remember much past the big plot points. I think I was just happy **spoiler alert** that Randy and Dewey were still alive.

Shoutout to Courtney Cox's hair throughout the entire series.

Anatomy of a Fall (2023) 9* - rewatch, at an outdoor cinema in the middle of Athens. Dream night. I love this movie, it's incredible, one of the best films to have come out in the past decade, and one of my all-time favourites. AND Sandra Hüller!

November:

Broker / 브로커 (2022) *7 -

Twilight (2008) *7 - rewatch

A Girl at My Door / 도희야 (2014) *7 - London Korean Film Festival

December:

Oldboy / 올드보이 (2003) *8.7 - London Korean Film Festival/rewatch

The Substance (2024) 7.3 -

Death Becomes Her (1992) *7 - rewatch

Anora (2024) *7 -

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982) *7.7 -

Home Alone (1990) *7 - Christmas rewatch

Bridget Jones's Diary (2001) *7 - Christmas rewatch

Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004) *6.3 - Christmas rewatch

The Holiday (2006) *6.7 - Christmas rewatch

Love Actually (2003) *7.3 -Christmas rewatch

Lucky Number Slevin (2006) *6.9 - rewatch (LOVE THIS MOVIE/part of my teenage watches that got me into film) I don't think I express my love for Lucy Liu enough.

End of Year/Books

October:

Intermezzo by Sally Rooney *5

Things I Don't Want to Know by Deborah Levy *5

Autumn by Ali Smith *5

The Cost of Living by Deborah Levy *4

November:

Why I Write by George Orwell *3

If We Were Villains by M.L. Rio *5

The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang *4

Real Estate by Deborah Levy *3

Our Wives Under the Sea by Julia Armfield *2.7

The Eyes Are the Best Part by Monika Kim *2

December:

When We Cease to Understand the World by Benjamín Labatut, translated by Adrian Nathan West *3

The Queen's Gambit by Walter Tevis *4.2

When I Arrived at the Castle by Emily Carroll *2.7

The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides *2

Currently reading: Bea Fitzgerald's The End Crowns All

Deborah Levy's Living Autobiography trilogy is very good, with the first book, Things I Don't Want to Know, touching on superb.

Pleasant surprise in The Queen's Gambit which I picked up from a street library - hugely enjoyable, uber readable, I immediately engaged with the characters, and the chess writing is delicious.

M.L. Rio's If We Were Villains is indeed the book that can fill the hole Donna Tart's The Secret History has created and left open and gaping. For all you dark academia seekers, all you've heard is true.

I'll read anything by Ali Smith or Sally Rooney.

In the I Read It so You Don't Have to category: (don't do it)

The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides (I'll give The Maidens a go as well - compatriot duties - but after this one and The Fury, I'm not sure)

Our Wives Under the Sea by Julia Armfield

September Films

She a really long one

Gravity (2013) *6 - took me long enough to get to this. Would have been better in the cinema.

She Said (2022) *6.5 - I love a true story journalistic pacy movie - and Carey Mulligan. Thought Keira Knightley was in this, she's not.

Wonderland / 원더랜드 (2024) *6 - plane watch. This was cute, and emotional.

Okja (2017) *7.3 - I LOVE STEVEN YEUN and a lot of other things about this movie that I will not elaborate on.

The Wailing / 곡성 (2016) *8.5 - I wish I had the words right now, but I don't. This movie is superb, nothing like anything I've seen before. Korean cinema continues to amaze and delight.

Quiz Lady (2023) *6 - new comfort movie alert. This was fun!

The Client (1994) *5 - I don't remember too much of this, just that I thought I'd like it more than I did, and that Susan Sarandon is a delight, as always.

True Romance (1993) *7 - some of it is uncomfortable but yeah, I get it, I get why people are obsessed.

Blink Twice (2024) *7 - this was loud, fun, cool, distressing; just not life-changing.

Cocaine Bear (2023) *7 - SO MUCH FUN, great stuff, absurd.

His House (2020) *5 - I didn't really like this, I didn't think it worked, had a bit of promise with the concept.

Spinning Man (2018) *5 - what? Like a dream, any memory of this is gone. Could watch again; it's not great, whatever really.

September Books

The Island of Sea Women by Lisa See *3.5 - this was of interest because of the concept. The writing, plot and characters were not of particular note, but the imagery it evokes and the research that has gone into not just the lives of the haenyeo (해녀) women, but also the historical background, are noteworthy and captivating.

Butter by Yuzuki Asako, translated by Polly Barton *4.7 - favourite read of the year. It has all you could ask of a book. There's a distinct writer voice with a specific own style, it's eery and uncanny, unpredictable, at times bonkers, visceral - reading this makes you feel like sticking your fingers in room temperature butter. DELECTABLE.

Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Kawaguchi Toshikazu, translated by Geoffrey Trousselot *2.9 - I am not a fan of this trend from publishers that are investing specifically in saccharine, didactic cum infantilising, short Asian fiction; the type of marketing they do for it is enraging. I wish the same kind of attention was put into SO MANY worthy stories and voices that have either not been translated into English, or the translation value/vision has not been great. This type of work definitely has a place in translated fiction, and it is certainly popular - I just wish it was not shoved down my throat in the way that it is; constantly. Having said this, this was better than I expected, even occasionally enjoyable.

August Books & Films

(cause it's a short list)

Wicked Little Letters (2023) *5 - I love Olivia Coleman and Jessie Buckley's work dearly. This was just about okay, with a couple of funny moments. The true story on which this is based on is interesting; the movie, unremarkable.

I only read two books in August, but I bundled These Violent Delights with Our Violent Ends so I could rant about them together.

First, Bobby Fischer Goes to War by David Edmonds *3/5 - this was my lengthy non-fiction in print of the year. I usually have the one. Sometimes, it's something life changing, like Fermat's Last Theorem. Other times, it's something quasi fun, well written, but ultimately pretty forgettable, like this one.

And for the main course, These Violent Delights and Our Violent Ends by Chloe Gong *3/5 for the both of them combined (*3.7-4/5 for the first one, *2.7/5 for the second)

In bullet points, from my phone notes: *this is a Romeo & Juliet 1920s Shanghai gang reimagining. (the potential!)

The concept is interesting but so ambitious it becomes the duology's undoing. There is so much going on: a monster, political turmoil, family politics, history.

The political threads, despite their potential, are ambitious, often wishy-washy, and don't track, both on character level and overall.

The Shakespearean bits interwoven through the books are delicious, and many of the changes in plot are satisfying. I loved that Roma and Juliette had a past and we're now joining them years later when they must once again encounter each other.

There is a lot of repetition and recycling of plot; would have benefitted from cuts.

Most importantly, both of these books are majorly lacking in romance. There is no pining, no yearning in a cohesive manner. I wanted my heart to break at these characters' plight. Instead, the reader has to imagine the fullness of their connection based on the morsels of their past we're given.

I wish the plot focused more directly, and exclusively, on the feud, building on a couple of events surrounding that, only accented by the political turmoil. With convincing infatuation, the two struggling with family unrest and power that would grant the opportunity to build a better future for Shanghai, their sacrifice could have changed the course of history. I wanted to see two young people struggling with their sense of identity as heirs of power in Shanghai, the futility of this passed-down feud, and their uncontrollable love for one another.

I also wish queerness was better woven through and more prominent.

Shanghai as a main character wins.

July Books

She a long one

I also left this so late, I don't remember much

The Trespasser by Tana French - don't remember anything about this, just that I enjoyed speeding through it. I think Tana French's work has that quality of quiet enjoyment to it. A small break from reality - so a 3*? (that's my goodreads rating anw)

Μαμά by Μαργαρίτα Καραπάνου *4.7/5 - this, I do remember. It's a quick read, much of Karapanou is; none of it is light and this one is darker and more complex than most. It's a melee of the writer's relationship with/memory of her mother. Vignettes, impressions, memories, snippets of a life lived, felt or imagined. Karapanou was a remarkable artist, and boy, could she weave a sentence.

I'm Not Here to Give a Speech by Gabriel García Márquez *4.5/5 - delightful; just a neat little collection of speeches. Isn't it funny how gifted some people are at things they don't really enjoy doing?

American Born Chinese by Gene Luen Yang *5/5 - nothing to see here. Love all around. <3 <3

Tokyo Express by Seichō Matsumoto *3.5/5 - this was yummy. If you find oldish, matter-of-fact writing, noir-type police procedurals with limited but astute action delicious, this is for you.

Girl Goddess Queen by Bea Fitzgerald *4/5 - okay. Hear me out.

*sidenote* This is Lore Olympus in novel form. So much so that I wondered if Bea Fitzgerald wasn't a pen name for Rachel Smythe and vice versa.

--

Was it repetitive, occasionally annoyingly so? Yes. Did I think it could have benefitted from better editing? Yes. Did I obsess over it and think about the characters and the slow-burn romance of it all for at least a week? Yes. Did I buy Bea Fitzgerald's new novel a day into publication and can't wait to read it but I'm travelling a lot and didn't want to carry it cause it's huge? Yes. Did it make me hyperfixate on finding the epic romance of the decade - the century even, the book that makes your knees tremble, to no avail? Yes.

I loved this. I loved this so so much, flaws and all.

*sidenote, again* Madeline Miller rewriting Persephone too - would love to read that version

The Familiar by Leigh Bardugo - like a 3*. It's not something that sticks but it's readable and you do care when you're reading it. One thing I can say for certain, I was sure I wanted to read more Leigh Bardugo, and I have, since reading this, spent a lot of time on deciding what that'll be. (Six of Crows, probably this Autumn, early Winter)

Little Rot by Akwaeke Emezi *3.7/5 - It's a good narrative from a very talented writer/artist, whose work I've admired from the get-go and will continue to consume either til the end, or til the potentially inevitable decline. The .7 purely on talent.

July Films

Kinds of Kindness (2024) *5 - some really good elements. Unfortunately it deteriorates with each new story. Felt like I was watching it forever.

Burning Sun: Exposing the secret K-pop chat groups (2024) *7 - one more for shit, the world really is this bad. Power sucks balls.

Bottoms (2023) *7.5 - HELL YEAH. more of this, all the time, please. SO MUCH FUN

Longlegs (2024) *6.5 - superb start. Wish it stuck with the slow-burn legal mystery, or developed from it better.

June Films

Short but sweet:

Train to Busan (부산행) 2016 *7.5 - was surprised this didn’t come out earlier based on how much it has inspired subsequent work. Hell.Yeah. I love love love that it takes off so quickly and aggressively, infection rates are insane ——— attention: the zombies are not slow. This is a leaning forward, elevated heart rate watch through and through. Events unfolding are a constant surprise, not the gasp, I didn’t expect that kind, because this movie is so good at breadcrumbing for peak emotional destruction.

Mission Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part One 2023 *6 - meh, coulda been better. The AI stuff was interesting but I prefer my no way moments to come in stunt only form. The plot felt too farfetched to be believable but only because it wasn’t brewed well enough.

Amadeus (Director’s Cut) 1984 *8 - first watch, at my favourite cinema, the Prince Charles - and if I remember correctly this was screened on film. I don’t have much to say, it’s superb, a feat of storytelling.

June Books

Blue Sisters by Coco Mellors *3/5 - I expected more from this. I loved Cleopatra and Frankenstein. The characterisation is very good and the start is promising, but it just gets boring. I feel like there was so much more that could be done, both with the plot and with the exploration of themes.

Rubyfruit Jungle by Rita Mae Brown *4.5/5 - the rating is a bit of a fuck you, like the book is a bit of a fuck you. There are many problems but it's certainly worth the read. Molly could sit alongside any great literary character and hold her own. She's one of those characters that stay with you as if they've lived - and in a way they have. The book is bold, loud, tenacious, and funny.

And it became increasingly clear that all Leroy and I had in common was a childhood full of ice cream, raisin boxes, and a mattress full of holes. But then I had never thought I had much in common with anybody. I had no mother, no father, not roots, no biological similarities called sisters and brothers. And for a future I didn't want a split-level home with a station wagon, pastel refrigerator, and a houseful of blonde children evenly paced through the years. I didn't want to walk into the pages of McCall's magazine and become the model housewife. I didn't even want a husband or any man for that matter. I wanted to go my own way. That's all I think I ever wanted, to go my own way and maybe find some love here and there. Love, but not the now and forever kind with chains around your vagina and a short circuit in your brain. I'd rather be alone.

James by Percival Everett *4/5 - Beautiful writing, nuanced reimagining. Looking forward to reading more Percival Everett.

what was read and referenced in the TV series

The Golden Notebook by Doris Lessing

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro

Moll Flanders by Daniel Defoe

Emma by Jane Austen

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain

All My Sons by Arthur Miller

Candide, or Optimism by Voltaire

bonus:

Poems by Frank O'Hara

May Films

Movies are back baby

Only three watches but the two would be enough for months.

Bad Moms (2016) *4/10 max - I thought this was going to be fun, funny, bonkers. It is a mess, with maybe 2 kinda funny lines. *single tear

Challengers (2024) *7/10 - electrifying; perfectly captures the sexy, pumping, adrenaline fuelled side of sport. What an opener to the summer. The performances are outrageous, the music even more so. Left the theatre feeling like I could conquer the world.

Love Lies Bleeding (2024) *6/10 - HELL.YES. More of this, please. Sweaty, sexy, funny. New peak Kristen Stewart.

---

Can it get any hotter than these two?!

It was the best timing for Challengers and Love Lies Bleeding to be released together. Watched them a week apart and I don't think I could have had a better time.

---

Here are some of my favourite letterboxd reviews:

Everything is sex, except sex, which is tennis (Bryan)

may thy racket chip and shatter (patrick)

i want zendaya to tell me to kill myself (cookie)

---

these are the muscles of a killer, bella (jeaba)

May Books

Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell *4.7/5 - the craft is just awesome. I had favourite sections and I had favourite people (shoutout to Sonmi, Sixsmith and Robert Frobisher). The tingling anticipation when I realised the sections would run backwards back to the start - yum. The threads connecting the stories through time; the mix of genres - ugh, so good.

Normal People by Sally Rooney *5/5 - I stayed away from this one during its peak, opting to read Conversations with Friends instead, which I loved. I still carry a lot of it with me, and for subject matter, I would probably pick it over this one; except that this is a perfect book. It does what it sets out to do so, so well.

It is one of the secrets in that change of mental poise which has been fitly named conversion, that to many among us neither heaven nor earth has any revelation till some personality touches theirs with a peculiar influence, subduing them into receptiveness. - George Eliot, Daniel Deronda (opening inscription to the book)

This is about those relationships that change you, connect you to another person in an immovable way, and mark you for life. I love the unapologetic awkwardness, the leaning into the, often, devastating turn of events, that is so true to life.

Happiness Falls by Angie Kim *3/5 (ebook) - went into this for a taste of mystery. It's mostly okay, a quick read, was thinking about Eugene for days after. There are ups and downs, some enjoyable, pacy bits but it left me unchanged, and worse, nonplussed.

Day by Michael Cunningham *3.2/5 - I've read some of Cunningham's work - The Hours, Flesh and Blood - both of which were five star reads. I didn't think this was a masterpiece, it read more like a writing challenge, as if Cunningham is still experimenting with Virginia Woolf's Mrs Dalloway, churning theme and structure to differing results. The characterisation is a great strength, giving life to an otherwise unremarkable book. What is undeniable is the writing talent. I wouldn't mind reading any of his work, ever. Bonus points for finishing this in a Day. sorrynotsorry

-- pic with summer flowers and Cassandra the centipede

April Books

Didn't get through a lot but was reminded how great it is to spend time with a story and the people in it. Shoutout to good big books out there <3

-- is it a better or a worse experience if you feel bereft after you finish a book?

11/22/63 by Stephen King *4.5/5

April Films

JFK (1991) *8/10 - if you love legal dramas, journalistic, historic, conspiracy vibes. Bonus if reading 11/22/63 at the same time.

Annette (2021) *7.5/10 - obsessed. The soundtrack rocks.

The Woman King (2022) *6.5/10

March Books

+ the last of Tournament of Books pre-tournament

The Guest by Emma Cline *3/5 - an anxiety trip that leaves you wanting more

American Mermaid by Julia Langbein *4/5 - a tad strange, funny, an enjoyable ride overall

Dune: The Graphic Novel, Book 1; Dune: The Graphic Novel, Book 2: Muad'Dib by Brian Herbert (Adapted by), Kevin J. Anderson (Adapted by), Frank Herbert, Raul Allen (Illustrations), Patricia Martín (Illustrations), Bill Sienkiewicz (Contributor) *4/5 - great for a drop back into the Dune world or a light introduction for those who want it but not the full book experience

Brainwyrms by Alison Rumfitt *4/5 - hell yeah. A bit of a narrative struggle in the beginning but it pays off. Affecting body horror, and an accurate look at contemporary society and politics, especially in the UK

What You Are Looking for Is in the Library by Michiko Aoyama and Alison Watts *2/5 - nah. As saccharine and boring as many people have said

Dune Messiah by Frank Herbert *4/5 - it's interesting and the plot checks out but it's just not as good as Dune

March Films

more awards-related stuff and then FREEDOM (what I chose to do with it is another thing but one thing I cannot be judged for is there are a LOT of movies this month, and that is positive)

must-watches in bold (these are in relation to other movies watched, and the time, not necessarily must-watches of all time)

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: Once & Always (2023) *6ish, I guess? - does this count? It's nostalgia in an hour's worth. it's every bit as bad as you would hope. Great stuff.

American Fiction (2023) *7.5 - hell yeah. Finally, something important done in a pleasant, human, enjoyable way (see how much I sobbed during this awards season: so.many.super.sad movies - or if not sad, just.so.much, overall). Performances are out of this world; it has everything: humour, nuance, a bit of romance, a bit of sadness; it was so damn good to watch.

The Zone of Interest (2023) *6 - how do you rate this? that six is not representative of the movie at all, but here we are. Everything you've heard about this is true: it's masterful, definitely a gut punch, Sandra Hüller is having a great year; the sound(track) is out of this world. It says so much with so little. Yes, it's a movie about the Holocaust, but it's also, really, a movie about how we stand by and allow atrocities to happen. It's a movie about humanity's cruellest side: indifference - right now, and then, and always. There is much to be said here, a lot of conversation was around how Schindler's List worked as a movie, therefore, romanticised, by the movie lens, the Holocaust. I can see how The Zone of Interest tried really hard not to do that, and I can confidently say it's done so much for exposing how useless we can be in the face of tragedy, but with every day that passes, I keep thinking more and more that it hasn't escaped that movie lens. However, it does really well at asking the question of whether we can portray atrocities of this kind, and does it really make a difference when we try?

Dune: Part Two (2024) *7.5 - umm, this is so long I need to rewatch it to even have a formed opinion. In lieu of a rewatch, here are my current thoughts: it wouldn't have been half the movie it is without the soundtrack. Also currently my favourite soundtrack of all time. I could rave and rave about it. The performances were great all round. I really love that Villeneuve doesn't try to constantly capture people like the mega starts they are: see Timmy's double chin, constipated face, present in both movies, and at a close-up at that. Some scenes were visually and emotionally breathtaking but I'm not sure if this was the case because of the anticipation of seeing something loved in a book portrayed on screen. It felt busy and a bit disjointed, especially in comparison to Part 1. I so wish they'd done the romance differently. I was constantly thinking of The Bear and how well that worked there. I wish they'd let Paul and Chani's connection breathe and mature, taken us along for the ride.

Alice, Darling (2022) *6 - this gave How to Have Sex vibes. I love when a movie addresses difficult subjects (in this case, abuse) in a slice-of-life, uber real, awkward way. It dexterously looks at the outward indicators of abuse, the responsibility of friendship - some mild body horror for both symbolic and literal purposes.

The Sixth Sense (1999) *7.5 - they don't make them like this anymore. Boy, do I envy anyone who hasn't watched this and doesn't know anything about it. If you know that person, please, make them known, I want to sit them down and pop this in the cassette player (Netflix or Prime or whatever, but you know). It's only the second time I watched this because I thought there wasn't much reason to, apart from nostalgia. Surely, it's just so worthy because of the set-up. Yeah, yeah, I was wrong. I had to pause a couple of times to allow myself to digest the mastery of what this movie is when YOU DO KNOW.

Scarface (1983) *7 - what can I say? Yup, it's great. Colours are a highlight, as is Michelle Pfeiffer.

A Time to Kill (1996) *6 - disclaimer: I am going through legal dramas, I love 'em. This was fun, much more timely than I expected. Samuel L Jackson has a beautiful, beautiful speech. A man fancies a woman that is not his wife, and she is pretty, and young, and smart, and she ignites a spark in him, and she believes in what he's doing in all the ways his wife doesn't, and yet, said man doesn't cheat on said wife. Woohoo. I'm all for complexity and non-monogamy (when both, or more parties, agree to it) but it is just so beautiful to see a good marriage challenged and withstand the challenge. Bonus points for young Matthew McConaughey and infant Sandy Bullock. It's serious, it's legal fun, a bit naïve; the nineties in a two and a half hour ride.

Rush Hour; Rush Hour 2; Rush Hour 3 (1998) (2001) (2007) *6 *6 *5 - WAR UGH ... SO MUCH FUN. Yeah, they shouldn't be bunched together, yeah, a lot of it reads problematic, yeah, I wish I'd been watching them all my life. Great stuff. Don't look away at all the racist jokes, both ways, and any other way you can imagine. This is a superb example of looking at what we made for fun: there's so much to digest, learn from, appreciate. I LOVE JACKIE CHAN. When I was a kid, it was considered embarrassing to appreciate his work. I had a stupid-ass, DUH, moment of realisation watching this: oh, that 'martial arts movies are sub-par' idea? Yeah, blatant racism. It feels so good to come to this now. Side-note: Zhang Ziyi showing up in 2, what a treat. I'm not one for recycling material but can we have Rush Hour 4 please, please, please?

Blow Out (1981) *6 - another Brian de Palma, another good movie with its merits. Some of it was delicious in a movie buff way, but I was bored nonetheless. If you're into your legal, crime, journalistic slow-burners, go for it.

Decision to Leave (2022) *9 - triple bold. This is my favourite movie. It has been since I saw it in the cinema and cried in the toilets after. It is a masterpiece, Park Chan-Wook might well be my favourite director. There are not enough good things or good enough words I could say. Here's the best I can do rn: noir at its best, romance at its most complex, human nature at its barest, lyricism, depth, story for days, really unapologetic storytelling, no infantilising the audience here, crime at its most beautiful, and potentially the best ending scene cinema has ever seen. Watch this, watch The Handmaiden, watch Stoker, watch Oldboy (when I watch more of his movies, they'll be added to this). They're all in my great movies of all time (fictional) list. Side-note: WE ARE SLEEPING ON KOREAN CINEMA. We're getting there, but we're not even close. Still underrated.