what the heck

You can’t just say “accidental date” and not elaborate on how that happened

*shrugs* we met & got tipsy together at a beach party & stayed up stargazing & bonding over our opinions on the Very Worst Ocean Animals, and then we were hungry & went to get breakfast & after copious amounts of waffles she casually kissed me goodbye on the lips and that’s when i remembered we were both bisexual and had technically spent the last 6 hours flirting (because complaining passionately about blue whales counts as flirting if you are queer me)

huh so what complaints do you have about blue whales

oh i am so glad you asked

finally. the source of the gender fluid

...I need this track. NEED.

my kink is blocking people that don't even know I exist but I happened to see one of their shit takes and delete them from my existence

Sometimes the key to progress is realizing that you don't have to do it perfectly. That you don't even have to do it well. You just have to do it.

reblog to inject motivation into the bloodstream of the person you reblogged from

I joke about being mean and evil but then people are Actually just genuinely shitty and I'm like. Doesn't it make you feel bad when you act like that

Just want everyone to know when I say 'evil' I really just mean "villainous and campy like a cartoon antagonist"

I think the worst possible outcome of tumblr getting popular again would be twitter types registering complaints about being told to get devoured by swarms of ravenous bees over their lame opinions, and staff feeling an obligation to ban threats of violence or whatever.

In case this ever happens I want to wish anybody who would support that a very happy falling into an orchestra pit and being pulled apart like brisket on the relentless bows of a highly focused string section.

enough games if you say something annoying about dream i'm straight up killing you

the way people talk ab dream stans genuinely is disgusting

it’s one thing to think fans of something are annoying (and even then it’s like why precisely are people enjoying themselves and minding their own business sooo inconvenient to your life but whatever) it’s another to say things like ‘they just worship everything he does’ ‘his cult will listen to his every word’ ‘his brainwashed fans will jump to protect their dream’ it’s vile

listen i have a lot of issues with modern fandoms and the mcyt community but i will literally go down fighting for this community let people enjoy things assholes