sex is a distraction from your true purpose in life which is to go to the aquarium and look at the fish and go "wooooooaaah.... fishies". cmon guys we all need to lock in.

Not book smart or street smart but a secret third thing.

supid

supid.

nice dick as always bro

wait i just found out you can be nice to people and be their friend i thought we had to kill them all cause i was raised in a lab to be a living weapon

Literally always take headphones with you. If you decide that you probably won't need them today, that's the devil talking. You will. You will

Music playing at the grocery store is psychological warfare. Protect yourself.

I have heard a variant on it that I really like: "You cannot hate yourself into someone you can love."

(begging you to get me started) UGH don't get me started.......

summer thunderstorms are one of the most romantic things in the world, actually

People who had kids on purpose really will come home from work after the worst day ever like "there better not be any fucking kids in here."

notice how its littlest pet shop and not littlest pet shelter, littlest pet adoption center, littlest pet rehabilitation. really twisted.

Also, no wonder Lestat made an ass of himself at the de Pointe du Lac family dinner in season one, he has no home training and a family dinner table is a PVP enabled zone in his mind. He is used to it being a WWE SmackDown and not the site of quiet and deftly targeted advanced psychological warfare tactics like in a normal dysfunctional family.

Lestat probably sat down at that table and wondered, “what the HELL is this family doing? Why isn’t Louis pulling a knife on Paul again?”

staying alive purely to achieve my final form of universally terrifying horror movie villain according to male directors. a fat disabled wrinkly old woman