온통 상처투성이겠지

Waiting was something that he hated a lot. Living alone for so long made him used to do everything in his own time, so it was terribly annoying to consider others didn’t have the same velocity or interest. Twenty minutes have passed and he was about to get up and tell his secretary to call Han Jaeyeol again when the door suddenly opened and someone walked in. It wasn’t an old man like the one in the photo he saw when he was doing research, but a young one - someone familiar. His brain took a few seconds to believe his eyes, but he recognized him right away. Seokjin was speechless.

Instead of Mr. Han, they sent Namjoon in his place. How was that even possible? What he was doing in Uisu? Seokjin thought he was losing his mind and seeing things again, but the confirmation came as he introduced himself with some cocky tone. Surprises aside, what really bothered him was that he was either pretending not to know him or worse - he didn’t remember him at all. A lump formed in his throat at the sight of his old friend. The memories were quite clear in his mind - how they were close once and how he turned disaposable to Namjoon. He thought he was over whatever happened in the past, but now he wasn’t so sure.

“Kim. Seok. Jin,” he said bitterly. “That’s my name, in case you don’t know,” Seokjin continued. He couldn’t help but feel hurt with the whole situation. Meeting him like this after over a decade was already too much, but he couldn’t even recognize him? That was too harsh and cruel. 

He crossed his arms around his waist and swallowed his disappointment. If Namjoon was going to pretend he didn’t know him, he would do the same. After all, Seokjin was there to buy the painting and not show his emotions to someone who didn’t care enough for him. They weren’t friends anymore and they had nothing to talk about but business. “I’m offering 22,000 USD, which is twice what he paid for this. I believe it’s quite fair,” he answered, avoiding eye contact. 

Namjoon couldn’t help but feel a bit insulted by how rude the other man was being -- who did he think he was talking to? The way the man had said his name made Namjoon think he was supposed to know him. Was he famous? Though he looked familiar, he thought maybe it was just because he had seen him around the hospital somewhere. Kim Seokjin. That wasn’t a too common name, though his best friend when he was younger--

Fuck.

“Seokjin,” Namjoon repeated, mind drowning out the rest of what the man had to say. This was Seokjin? How long had it even been since they had last seen each other? He instantly felt guilty for not recognising him, but put the thought out of his mind as he bolted up from the chair and all but launched himself at his old best friend. “Holy shit, Seokjin!” He could feel tears forming in his eyes as he pulled the other man close to him, basically sitting on his lap as he did so. He hadn’t seen his best friend in years. He had felt terrible for losing contact with him in the first place, but it was never anything Namjoon did by choice.

His parents had forced him out of the house, and Namjoon remembered selling everything he had just to give himself enough money to eat. “Fuck, I-- I’m sorry, it’s been so long, but that’s not even an excuse, I should’ve-- I should’ve recognised you, I’m sorry,” he spoke, his voice breaking. It registered in his mind that he should start explaining himself, but he wasn’t even sure where to start, and he didn’t think Seokjin deserved excuses for why Namjoon couldn’t contact him. His best friend was too good for that, he deserved better -- he deserved a best friend who wouldn’t just disappear like he did. Still, he hoped the younger man knew how regretful he was.

@dvnamjoon​

Collecting art was as natural as breathing for him and also a big passion. Seokjin loved to spend his time visiting online galleries all around the world and contacting both artists and other collectors via e-mail to discuss about business. It started as a simple hobby to distract himself from the boredom that was his life and it turned to be how he started making his own money. After graduating, he was hoping he would become a big name as an art dealer and be able to travel the world looking for hidden treasures and talents, to see all the beauty with his own eyes and not anymore through a computer screen.

But there is one item he has been wanting for months now - a contemporary painting made by a rookie artist from New York. When he finally decided to buy it, someone was faster and got it first. He has been trying to track the owner to convince the man to sell it to him and after two months of time and money spent, he found the owner was not only in South Korea, but they lived in the same city. He was the owner of the local hospital in Uisu and a bigger one in Busan. Seokjin called his office during the whole week and received no answers, but he replied one of his e-mails after all and told him to meet him at the hospital the next day.

Hospitals made him very uncomfortable. He was always treated at home whenever he was sick and the only time he entered an hospital was to bring his ill butler and it wasn’t of any help. His memories weren’t good, but he really wanted to put his hands on that painting, so if it meant having a meeting in that place, he would try his best. He even prepared himself before, studied the market and prepared a good amount of money to offer the man. It was a shame that this art item was being used to decorate the man’s office with no meaning, but it was good - if he liked art as much as Seokjin, he probably would deny his request.

So, that left Namjoon with having to meet the man himself. He didn’t care too much, since rather than doing this, he would just be charting, but running errands for attendings wasn’t something he particularly wanted to do. Though, he hated getting lectured more, and it was with that thought that he made his way to the chief’s office. The chief himself was in a surgery, one that Namjoon would have liked to scrub in on, but he had known he wouldn’t be able to even before receiving this errand from his attending.

Pushing open the door to the chief’s office, Namjoon closed the door behind him and made his way to the desk, sitting down in the chief’s chair. He couldn’t help but feel a bit of thrill at sitting at the chief of surgery’s desk, but pushed that out of his mind in order to focus on the man in front of him. “I hope you weren’t waiting long,” he began, smiling. “You must be...” Namjoon trailed off; his attending hadn’t exactly told him the man’s name. He cleared his throat, then continued. “I’m Kim Namjoon, second year resident and, if I do say so myself, Cardio Godde-- God,” he laughed.

Jimin giggled as he hugged the older man, face landing in the middle of Namjoon’s chest, consciously reminding him of their quite impeccable size difference. “Christ thirty people Joon, did everyone make it out okay do you know? I’ll have to bring a few bouquets down to the hospital and the restaurant for sure. That’s so sad. I’m glad you got it handled though, I’m sure everything was fine with you working, you practically run that place.”

“The shop is fine, a little crazy since the seasons changing. New imports, new blooms more orders so people can decorate for the summer… basically a fucking mad house but I love it. It keeps me busy.” He added with a non nonchalant shrug allowing himself to lean against the railing. Jimin had always admired how cool under pressure Namjoon was, for as long as he’s known him, he handled hospital fiasco’s with ease, and came home with no sweat on his brow. He was sure it all phased him enough. Namjoon’s come into the shop plenty of times with blood shot eyes still in his scrubs after losing someone on the table, and he couldn’t imagine how detrimental on your mental health that could be.

“Of course I’m in. We both deserve a little break.” He smiled brightly making his way back up the little hill that lead to their spot. “I’ll take the cover charge then? If they’ve just opened it shouldn’t be much.” He said with a shrug of his shoulders as he dusted off his hands. The pair had a habit of scoping out new places to hang out, often settling on little hole-in-the-wall spots that most people didn’t frequent. In all honesty, Jimin hadn’t cared what they did, it had been while since him and Namjoon decently hung out and he missed the elder, grateful that they were going to spend some quality time together after a hectic week.

At the mention of bringing flowers to the hospital and restaurant, Namjoon laughed. If only other people were as nice as Jimin. “Not everyone, unfortunately. Couple of my own patients died, and I’m the best damn surgeon there, which means other people who weren’t on my watch probably died,” he laughed. He remembered back in his early days as an intern, patients dying was something he took far too seriously. It was probably bad, now that he thought about it now, but after being there a few years, it still got to him sometimes but overall it just seemed like an everyday thing. Which, technically, it was.

Sometimes, though, Jimin’s line of work seemed to be just as, if not more, hectic than Namjoon’s own. At least medicine didn’t vary based on the season. He had known Jimin long enough, and visited his store as well, to know how much things change depending on what time of year it was, and had walked in to a completely different looking store a couple of times. It took him a while to wrap his head around the fact that the store probably just looked different because different flowers were in season. “Maybe I should put in an order soon?” he laughed. “I need some blue flowers for my house. Something to match my hair. What do you suggest?”

“Wha- Right now???” she couldn’t hide her surprise, her eyebrows probably hit the rooftop. Wasn’t it too much for someone that inexperienced? She was about to complain and say it wasn’t fair, but if she did he would probably choose another intern and it would take more six months or even more for her to get another chance. If she had more time, she would probably go practice and do more research - it wasn’t the case though, so she simply took the patient’s chart and read the important informations since that’s all she could do. Before she could assimilate that she was really going to walk into an OR, Namjoon was already walking to the elevators. He really meant right now.

She followed him, determined to make a good job and show her skills. “No need to worry. I’ll do my best,” she assured as they entered the elevator. Her mind suddenly could only see and process informations about cardio surgeries, but it was cut off by Namjoon messing with her hair. “Yah! Don’t distract me,” she scolded him trying to keep a serious face, but it was all for nothing since her lips were already curving into a smile. He was nice when he wasn’t ordering her around.

Haejoo wasn’t the kind that would praise her superiors to show her admiration, but he was someone she really looked up to as a doctor. He was skilled and his diagnoses were always right even though he was young. It was weird how he was only one year older than her and way more experienced. She paid total attention to every word he said before the surgery, taking mental notes of everything. It was really important for her to succeed today.

After she had scrubbed in, she followed inside the operating room. It was thrilling and she was sure it was the place she wanted to spend more time in. The patient was right in front of her - today she was going to do it in someone fighting hard to live, so it was a complete different feeling. Her heart was filled with mixed emotions, but she felt ready for this. She joined Namjoon and devoted all her interest in this. Every word he said, she simply answered with a nod, her eyes were too focused on what was happening there for her to speak. Out of blue, he decided to test her knowledge. She froze, but the answer was on the tip of her tongue. “The mechanical valve is way more durable than the tissue valve and has less risk of reoperation, but it means anticoagulation theraphy for the rest of life, with its accompanying risk of bleeding. Ah, and the sound can be quite distrubing,” she replied, eyes still fixed on the body.

If there was one place where Namjoon felt truly at home, it was in the operating room. It was in here where he felt like he was closer to perfect -- sure, even outside of his life as a surgeon, he had full capability to save lives with his abilities, but this was different. He had worked hard for this; it wasn’t something he could do just by holding someone’s hand long enough, drawing out illnesses in a way likely no other doctor could. The thought was funny, that it was the part of him that made him just like everyone else that made him feel the most proud of himself.

So maybe that was why he was so nervous having someone so inexperienced in the room with him, someone who could possibly mess up this surgery for him -- but this was Haejoo. Everyone made mistakes, but either Namjoon turned a blind eye due to his own bias or Haejoo really did just make less mistakes than the rest of his idiotic interns. He had to yell at the others a few times to get them to do anything, but Haejoo, thankfully, always seemed to be on top of things, which was the reason Namjoon was so confident in her now.

At her correct answer, Namjoon smiled. “Correct. Don’t tell me you actually went to med school,” he joked. Not that he thought his other interns didn’t, because they wouldn’t be here otherwise, but sometimes it felt like they just... slept through the whole thing, or something -- definitely didn’t pay attention. Once the tubes were inserted into the patient’s heart and the heart-lung machine was working, Namjoon placed a clamp around the aorta, making sure it was in place properly before looking up at Haejoo. “You’re in this OR with me, so you’re gonna do a bit of the work here. The next thing we’re gonna do is open the aorta so we can see the valve. I’ve already clamped it, so we’re good to go. You think you can handle this?”

[ sms  ↠ joonie ] u srsly need a few days off

[ sms  ↠ joonie ] hmmm, partying?

[ sms  ↠ joonie ] i’ll be there :)

Jimin placed his phone back on the counter, he was getting ready to lock up for the night when Namjoon had texted him, and honestly Jimin needed a good time himself. With the spring orders completely washing him over he found himself buried in petunias and sunflowers up to his neck with no remorse, and he didn’t drink much, but maybe that would calm his nerves.

“Fifteen minutes?” He mumbled to no one. That wasn’t a lot of time to get changed, but Jimin was never unprepared. His usual shop uniform consisted of a nice shirt with black slacks and dress shoes. Minimal make up of course, you never know what could happen while working with bountiful species of plants, and even with the sea breeze, it could get a little hot and humid moving about the shop.

The shirt he had on, a silky, white ‘v’ neck with long sleeves that flowed out around his wrist, would have to do tonight, but he traded his slacks and dress shoes in for a pair of ripped black jeans and a pair of black vans that probably weren’t clean and strung out in the back room from God knows what. He rolled the bottom of his jeans so they cuffed at his ankles, and smudged a bit of eyeliner on his lids, pushing his rose-colored hair out of his face in the process.

He had always enjoyed going out with Namjoon, whether they were just hanging out in their usual place, or somewhere new, or even at each other’s places, the elder’s presence was always inviting and welcome. He was good company, and was there for Jimin when he needed him, something Jimin was unused to. Years of moving around made making connections hard but Namjoon had been easy, extremely easy, they fit together snuggly and Jimin was grateful.

Jimin jogged up to their usual spot at the bridge, climbing over to the spot where he saw Namjoon settled and waiting for him, a bright smile spreading over his lips. “Joonie.” Jimin said tapping the elder on the shoulder. “Tough day at work?”

Namjoon checked his phone as Jimin’s response appeared on his screen. He smiled, but didn’t respond to the messages. He would much rather just talk to Jimin when he got here. He leaned against the railing, enjoying the view of the ocean. It was peaceful here now, but Namjoon always enjoyed it that much more when he actually had company -- Jimin’s company, anyway. The younger man’s cheerfulness was contagious, it seemed.

The sound of footsteps caught Namjoon’s attention, and he turned his head to the sight of his friend approaching. Well, that was fast. “Jimin! Just the person I wanted to see,” he laughed, as if their meeting was coincidental and not arranged. He turned to pull the other man into a brief hug, then leaned back against the railing. “That’s one way of puttin' it. Did you hear about the restaurant that had their ceiling cave in? Thirty injured people needin' surgery, man. Thirty,” he complained. They had been well staffed so Namjoon himself hadn’t performed too many of said surgeries, but trauma situations were exhausting enough.

Occasionally, Namjoon mused whether he should have Jimin teach him about his own craft -- but he loved his work as a surgeon a bit too much to ever consider switching. “How about you? How’s the shop?” he asked. Namjoon always loved hearing about Jimin’s numerous travel stories, but hearing Jimin talk about his flowers and his shop was another thing he very much so enjoyed. He couldn’t help but envy him a little bit as well; though he knew full well that Jimin had his own set of problems, his life where his career was concerned seemed far less stressful and much more interesting.

When Haejoo got accepted as an intern at the local hospital, she thought that in no time she would be joining surgeries and doing all the cool stuff. She worked really hard during medical school and she wasn’t the one who would slack off now she was working, so in her mind the residents and attending doctors would recognize it and trust her to do something interesting, but that’s not how things work in reality. Everyone there worked hard and it wasn’t enough to impress when we’re talking about saving lives. She could understand it now, but it wasn’t enough to control her frustration.

Meanwhile, she had a lot of work to do. It was surprising how many patients they had in such a small town like Uisu. She was always busy reading charts for the residents, doing intubations, biopsies or just paper work, but somehow even this kind of thing would make her feel good - Haejoo really loved being a doctor. 

She was monitoring this patient who was waiting for a heart transplant when she heard someone walking in the room. Haejoo turned around to meet Namjoon, the resident she was assigned to. They would show up out of nowhere to check if the interns weren’t messing up or just to give them more things to do - she wondered which one would it be this time. “Yeah, just give me second,” she nodded. Quickly, she finished her notes and followed him out into the corridor. 

“Really?,” she asked, the excitement widened her eyes. “Yes, sure. I can do it,” the words escaped her lips before her brain could process the information. She wasn’t this sure if she was ready now that it was a real thing, but she would never admit it aloud - it was her chance to finally walk into the operating room and she wouldn’t miss it. “It’s scheduled to begin in how many hours?” she asked, trying to keep her composure and not look so thrilled. 

Haejoo’s reaction was quite expected, but all the same, Namjoon couldn’t say he didn’t enjoy it. If it was any other intern, he wouldn’t have cared, but he always liked seeing Haejoo happy. Not that he would ever admit that to her, though. Out of all her colleagues, Haejoo was the one who showed the most promise and potential as a doctor, and Namjoon felt most confident letting her be the first to scrub in with him over anyone else. That wasn’t to say that he wasn’t nervous at all, but he had faith in her.

At her response, Namjoon handed her the patient’s chart. He probably should have given her more of a warning before the surgery, but it wasn’t as if she was going to get warning before every surgery she did, especially where trauma cases were concerned. “When is it scheduled? Right now,” he responded, then began walking in the direction of the elevators. “I need you to pay full attention, got it? This isn’t the most difficult surgery out there but it’s also not the easiest. I don’t like mistakes.” Entering the elevator, Namjoon waited until the doors were closed before flashing Haejoo a grin and ruffled her hair. “Not that I think you’ll make any, of course.”

The walk to the operating room wasn’t a long one, and Namjoon tried his best to explain the surgery to Haejoo as they walked. Namjoon always found doing it a lot easier than explaining it, so he hoped Haejoo would just pick up on it as they went. “Just follow my lead and you’ll do great,” he told her with a smile, hoping to encourage her a bit. He remembered his own first surgery, and how absolutely terrifying it had been. Though, Namjoon liked to consider himself a bit of a nicer -- and more helpful -- resident than his own resident back then had been. Once fully scrubbed in, Namjoon entered the operating room, holding the door open for Haejoo to enter after him.