I could be wrong, you could be right

Not a major one

No okay I found the root of why I'm freaking out it should have been pretty easy to figure out but I'm literally just losing my fucking mind because being an alter sucks and I'm for some reason the ONLY one of us that gives a shit about that

Everyone else is like yeah chill we're in a brain together cool awesome and I'm sitting here like I CAN DISAPPEAR FOR MONTHS AT A TIME AND I AM AFRAID you know what I mean

Let me the fuck out of here holy shit I just want to be my own dude but that's never going to HAPPEN

YES I WILL VENT ON MY BLOG WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME /J

This is a vent though so like, if you're not interested don't read

I'M FREAKING OUTTTTTTTT

I don't even know how to fully articulate this because like, what?? What's wrong? Well I've been out for almost two weeks and infrequent for months at least and then I get slammed back into front for something stupid and I end up supremely disoriented and dizzy and confused and h

I'm not cohost anymore??? Fucking apparently all we knew about our system isn't real, random bullshit is different now

I don't think I'm going to split this would be a stupid thing to split over, but this is the same like, mindset I'm in every time that happened in the past

I'm not making any sense, it doesn't matter, this isn't for anyone

If I do split again I'm just going to have to fucking [redacted] though /j

I am so sick of multiplying why am I like that

Just took an anxiety pill though please save me

I don't even know what I want you know? Like do I want to be a regular presence in the brain again? Yes, but it's more complicated than that

I don't k n o w

I'm mad that I got written out of cohost without even like, talking to me about it :/

I know nobody COULD have talked to me because I was MIA and it made sense to write me out but I'm still not HAPPY about it

Uggugbgh whatever okay I'm feeling a little better for having written all this out