ugh

technically staying alive is a form of self harm, and eating food is just an addiction; all i have to do is just stop doing both and boom, perfect skinny dead corpse.

i keep fucking ruining shit. i always ruin shit i’m so fucking stupid i don’t deserve anything i don’t deserve love. i should’ve di3d all those fucking times but i guess i was too much of a fucking idiot to do it correctly

i feel the depression getting bad again. i held on till may again but at what fucking cost? i think about all my attempts and feel like a fucking loser. guess i can never do anything right. i feel like im always one wrong move away from ruining everything in my life. i walk on eggshells around myself. why even is this fuck ass life

i did it again, this time not as deep tho. i’m disappointed in myself, i could’ve gone deeper. it barely even went through the surface. mainly like bad scratches. i could do way better.

i did it. i broke the streak. im no longer sh free. and it feels so bad in the best way. i did it with some scissors and the cvt wasn’t deep sadly. i have chickened out. but i put rubbing alcohol on it and it felt great. it hurt so good. i felt like i could breathe again

i had to cut my nails to avoid sh. it’s so fucking hard. i just want to do it to ease the pain again, why is it so hard

the 988 crisis line is so stupid and makes you feel like a customer

i have a plan to end it but idk if this time it will work

i want to ď1ę