Canadian Bacon Trees

This is kind of horrifying

holy shit

the rest of the planetary system is like fuck you

I swear when cats get spooked, they shatter the laws of physics in order to escape. 

I want someone to blog about me the way this man blogs about pasta

A man draws a gun in a dark alley and asks for your wallet. You begrudgingly obey. He throws it on the ground, shoots it till it screeches, and turns to you; “you’re safe now”.

They are completely right.

@aeruh

@summernyx

“When you don’t want to disturb the cat”

There should be a millennial edition of Monopoly where you just walk round the board paying rent, never able to buy anything.

where is the amazon x 4chan post

I can’t believe a humble security guard saved our planet from the aliens.

college is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane

Okay, I laughed.

The game is over.

Game stopped