I have problems

Fuck this, where the fuck is Tony, I'm bringing back Stark *right now*

Fuck this, we've got nothing left, we're throwing Peter into DCU

At the end of the weird route in ch 5, 'you' and Noelle break out of Deltrarune. This is supported by the screen going black and fuzzy at the end, referencing a tape and it's specific side, which is not done in any of the other chapters. Additionally, it would fit with what Noelle was saying- that she wanted to do something crazy, something not like herself, not limited to her (quote) "marching down my path... watching myself through glass."

It would also make sense as to why there is now a separate route for aborted weird routes and plain weird routes. (There is even tags in the files that specify how many times you said 'proceed' vs 'stop'). In one, 'you' and Noelle are experiencing something else outside of standard Deltarune, whether it's easier to break the fourth wall, generally make Noelle more terrifying, or even a full simulation, like my friend suggested.

Honestly, my idea for the weird route is this-

She physically cornered me in my room (ironically, against my closet) and tried to ask why I felt this way and why it was bad. That God didn't allow for it. That there was only male and female, that girls couldn't love girls and boys couldn't love boys. That it was a sin to do so.

To this day, 7 years later, I have panic attacks at the thought of being asked out or in a serious relationship, regardless of whether it is seen as heteronormative or not. Because fundamentally, I am queer, regardless of who I date. Dating someone just drags them into my messed up psyche and my emotional difficulties with romance. Every time, I am dragged back into that mindset of God vs love, my faith vs my heart, and my family vs me. Because ultimately, I do believe there is a God and that he loves me, yet every single Christian has told me my love is broken and wrong.

I love so deeply and passionately, yet I have never trusted another person since my mother cornered me in my closet 7 years ago. I have never publicly dated again since the time my mom found me snuggling my girlfriend. Even now, I feel nothing but shame when my mother watches my little brother with pride as he dates his first girlfriend, when my relationship was only ignored and shamed. Reduced to something I hid in my room and at her house.

I have never been with someone intimately. I fear I never will because of my fear. I have panic attacks after even considering the thought of having intimate relations with someone, refardless of heteronormative standards, simply because at some point, my mom told me that queer love was wrong. My messed up brain said that, since I love men and women equally, all romantic love must be wrong.

Years later, I still love my mom. We have a good relationship, and we have shared hobbies. We discuss politics and other controversial topics with respect and understanding. I know that during the time I was forced out of the closet, my mom was in a horrible situation. My father was deployed, my sister was diagnosed with a degenerative neurological disorder, and I was obviously depressed. Her reaction to finding out my gender and sexuality was done with several other serious problems weighing on her head. I do not know if she would do the same to me now, now that we are in a stable setting and have a healthier relationship. I like to believe she wouldn't.

This does not mean I forgive her, nor have I forgotten the impacts of what she physically did to me and verbally said to me.

People can be good and still hurt you. You can still love the people who hurt you. But understand that, because of my mother's actions, I will never, ever be able to trust her with my love life again. I do not go to her with questions about relationships. I do not ask her about love and marriage. I now have strict boundaries about what I will willingly talk about with my mom, because of what she said to me when I was 14 years old.

I don't know if I'll ever be able to allow myself to love. Sometimes, I imagine I will torture myself forever because of my conflicting faith, love, desires, and family's views. I fear I will die alone and unwanted because I was never given the chance to learn what romantic love is in the first place.

I'm still learning how to love. I trust my dearest friends enough to share these things with them, and ask for advice. Dare say it, I love them, even if I'm not sure if it's romantic or even sexual. I just know that I love them and I want to live the rest of my life with them. Most importantly, I want to LIVE for them.

Even if my mother never understands my love for someone considered 'off-limits', I will love her. If I ever get married, she is invited to my wedding, bexause I know she values my happiness over her opinions and even morals. But she will always be untrustworthy to me on topics of my love life or even LGBTQ+ matters at all. Even if she did learn, change her behavior, I don't know if I could forgive her for it.

Because that conversation changed me forever. It really did. The amount of trust issues and fear I have around romatic relationships is insane, considering that I never had trauma before with romantic relationships or trust. I was bullied, sure, but nothing to indicate complete disillusionment with romance.

If she did learn to accept me and others, it would also require her admitting what she did to me, by accident or otherwise. Confronting the fact you hurt someone is so hard, especially when it's someone you love. My heart would be both broken and mended should she ever realize that she needs to apologize, and if she actually did it. It would hurt me beyond belief, because it would mean that my mom actually did something that was wrong, and I didn't deserve it. It would heal me because it means that my mom loved me enough to reflect on herself and remember some of the worst days of her life, just to properly apologize to me.

This weekend I want to go to the Pride festival in my city. I am terrified, both due to the openness and the fact I am telling my mom where I'm going. She would never physically hurt me, and kicking me out of the house is not something she would do, but it doesn't mean she won't hurt me anyways. I learned that at 14, and maybe even before that.

Happy Pride to all the people who struggle with their identity. You are not any less valid because of your fear. You do not have to be visible to be queer, and you do not to be proud to be accepted. You just need to be loved. Maybe one day, you'll get the courage to be proud about your love, about your gender, and fully confront the fact that your sexuality and gender negatively impacted you due to the people around you. That you are proud you survived anyways. That your preserved and grew into your skin and kept your identity anyways.

Love is love. It's the most important tenant that Jesus ever taught. It's the most important thing that drives relationship with other humans. Most importantly, it defines how you treat yourself. Love yourself, and love would you feel close to.

Tim tomodachi immediately fell in love with Peter tomodachi.

He's been on the island for all of 30 seconds, max.

I guess it just be like that sometimes.

Is my human programing supposed to be able to recognize it, to know it on sight? My parents never dated, they were best friends before my dad purposed over a letter (like the sweetheart dumbass he is). For some reason, my mom said yes. What emotion was there? What drives that agreement, to know you'll be tied to someone else the rest of you life? For society to expect you to kiss and hug and have kids, to do the other things I don't understand of romance, and the feelings of romantic love I don't understand?

I don't understand. I feel my heart is irrevokably broken by the fact I can't understand. I don't feel it, and it hurts deep down inside that I can't feel it. I want to love like that, to devote myself completely to one person. I want to love and fight and struggle and live for another person, to go hand in hand in life. I want to love like that.

But I don't, and I'm afraid I can't.

Noelle, in the dark world, was met with an overbearing maternal figure who smothered her, refusing to let her go under the guise of protecting her?

Remember how Birdly was met with an maternal figure that did everything in their power to avoid him, even as he completed more grandiose and desperate goals in an attempt to gain her attention and affection?

Remember how we know nothing about Birdly or his family?

Flowey would have easily been bored enough to let the children wander through the underground, probably helping sometimes, hinder at others. He is obviously sadistic to put someone through that, no doubt.

He even states he thought he was the only one with the power to save and reset.

The only hard part about this is pinning down the exact time of Flowey's creation. Was it around the same times as the amalgamates? Before that? We know it was long enough to harass Sans and for Flowey to get bored of the world, but that means nothing to a world reseting God-like being.