hugging yourself closer, with the winter air nipping at the tip of your nose, you realise you’ve arrived home. your trembling hands inserting the key into the lock of your door, with a jingle, opening the front door. finally being welcomed home to darkness and the warmth of your small cozy apartment. but as your eyes adjusted to the low lights, you don’t fail noticing a pair of worn out converse placed on the side, near the rest of your shoes. your index finger hooks behind the ankle of your shoe to flick it off, panic and confusion settling between your eyebrows. after locking the door, you take cautious steps, silently tiptoeing towards your open living room. your grip tightening around the end of your shirt as you peep past the entry of your living room. the sound of cackling fire wood, and sparkling lights from a small christmas tree reflect on the ground as you see the back of someone’s head. warmth spreading across your face as you bite back a smile. 

“mark?” you whisper in disbelief. a quick wave of realisation also settles in the corners of your mind, when you remember: mark, is the only other person who has the key to your place. mark’s head swings to the sound of your voice, a smirk already plastering on his face. he’s fast on his feet, reaching you in a beat, arms out embracing you. as much as he didn’t want to admit, waiting around for you was agony. 

you sink your weight further into his broad chest, the feeling of his body warmth wrapping you whole; his scent familiar and his natural musk glazes your eyes. with small tears, you fist the material of his shirt, tightening your hold on him. “what are you doing here? why are you in the dark?” your voice is muffled against his chest as he chuckles. you feel the gentle weight of his hand stroke the back of your head, rocking you both side to side momentarily. you guess santa must have judged you nice, as your wish portrays as granted. mark being the best gift of all. 

“i know i’m always busy with schedules. but i made sure to be here for you, on our favourite day,” mark’s voice holds heavy with sadness and you feel it. understanding he’s stressed and busy, you offer him a reassuring smile. the darkness that drags below his under eyes don’t lessen the glint of sparkle found in his eyes as he listens to you. “you didn’t have to.” confessing with a tinge of falsehood, instantly grateful he’s really here. this made you hold onto him tighter, rubbing a big ‘no’ against the width of his chest. “i mean... how are you? how’d you get here? when?” you speed through questions, mumbling against his shirt. mark just chuckles at your words. 

“dude, why do you sound so sad?” he escapes away from your embrace, laughing, pulling at your ears gently. his fingers are warm, heating up the tips of your frost kissed ears. he takes time to look at you, taking your appearance whole and imprinting it in his tiny box of memories he holds for you. a small smile mirrors between you both as you sigh, rubbing your forehead against his chest, holding him close once again. “okay dude stop pouting! look what i got~” excitement tickling his toes as he guides you both, walking backwards blindly. you shadow his figure, your body draping along the wooden floor as you follow his steps. once he bends down backwards, you’re released;  watching him open his luggage. he must have just arrived from korea today. much to your curiosity and amusement (due to his bent figure) your eyes linger at the object he beholds in front of you. it’s a stocking. your name still barely stitched onto the heel at the foot of the stocking. you bite back the biggest grin, almost letting out a squeal, looking at his large toothy grin, and your heart swells. 

you finally absorb your surroundings. mark has put up a small christmas tree and he’s hung up lights. you close your eyes in disbelief, why did he have to go above and beyond with such little things. it made you almost feel guilty for not doing anything to the same degree for him. near the bottom of the tree was a small cardboard box filled with ornaments. he was so thoughtful. 

you gasp, remembering and rapid with your feet as you head towards your bedroom. leaving mark bewildered, alone in the living room. your eyes quickly scan under your bed. even though mark is busy promoting and working in korea, without fail, both of you always fill up a stocking for each other. either to send overseas or to give when you visit each other after christmas. finally grabbing hold of it, you tighten your grip onto the stocking. you bolt down the hallway with the same lightness in your steps as you float back to mark. 

you find him there standing with his back facing towards you as he holds the box of ornaments, in waiting. he’s already placed your stocking below the faux christmas tree. 

“i have yours.” you giggle, placing mark’s stocking rightfully by the stocking he’s given you under the tree. he laughs at your panting self, handing you the box of ornaments, to pat your head rather endearingly. 

you can’t help the way you wistfully watch the way mark carefully hangs some of the ornaments. he looks tired, but altogether happy. he radiates a soft glow, and it’s not just because the lights of the christmas tree that make him appear so. you look down at the box in hand and sigh, “you didn’t have to come all the way here you know?” it’s barely a whisper above the low christmas playlist he’s put on while you left him. mark stops what he does to look at your sunken figure. the side of his body nudges your shoulder out of trance. “don’t be silly.” he reassures you with one of the most happiest smiles you’ve seen all winter. you smile at his playful self, deciding not to push him further about it, and just be grateful he’s even there to begin with. 

you spent the rest of the night with ‘the grinch’ playing in the background as you laugh together. you caught up with each other, asking him stories about his promotions and work. he reciprocates the questions. when you exchange your stockings and open the small presents, you can’t help being reminded of why you love christmas as much as you do. seeing mark’s smiling face only shows how much he feels the same way. and by the end you’re both breathless and light headed from all the laughing and giddy feelings you were getting. he’s home. you even decorated a store bought gingerbread house together. finishing the movie, you sit back against the couch, still in disbelief mark’s made this journey all the way to you. 

“thank you for coming,” you finally confess, and he sits up at your words. mark strokes your ear in between his middle and index figure with a swift movement, a smile on his lips. the ambiance is light, and your feel like everything about christmas makes sense when you’re celebrating it with mark. 

“i’ve missed you.” 

mark’s words are frosted with truth and you fall into a daze as he continues to watch your bashful self. 

“and i’ve missed you.” 

“i know.” 

there’s silence as the movie dies out. the only sound filling the room was the small crackle of firewood heating the room and your heartbeat hammering in your chest. the atmosphere suddenly feels heavier. he knits his eyebrows together at your empty words which fail to pass through your parted lips. you’re lost for words as he shuffles closer to you. “i-“ 

he stops his movements, softening his expressions as you find words. somehow, from your earlier endless ramblings, you’re finally all out of words. mark raises his eyebrows. “i have one more surprise.” you finally manage to say. 

mark’s eyes widen at your statement, feeling excited at the mystery surprise. 

“what is it?” 

“follow me.” you bait, jogging slightly towards your bedroom. he follows you with an airy laugh as you reach the doorway of your bedroom. 

you show him a teasing finger, pointing up towards the mistletoe that hung at the top of your bedroom door. he shares a laugh with you, being reminded of the teenage years where you’d pretend to be so love-struck and mocking of the ‘mistletoe kiss’. you’re leaning towards his cheek, about to give him your traditional version of the mistletoe kiss. 

but mark thought he was going to give you the kiss. 

his lips press against the outer corner of your lips. the curves of your lips just barely touch one another before you step back in shock. 

his skin was warm, and you both stare at each other with wide eyes because of the sudden contact. mark’s cheeks turn rosy because of your reaction. the butterflies finding purpose in your tummy making you feel shy. you both try your hardest to fight back a laugh, feeling childish. mark loved the way you’d always find ways to make him feel happy, effortlessly giving him reasons to laugh. he’s really glad he decided to come home to you for christmas. he really missed you, despite his busy world. the fact that you’re really there in front of him after so long, gave him a push. 

with a surge of confidence, the pads of his fingertips linger at the base of your neck. effortlessly you feel magnetic to him, your body lures into his aura as a faint smile graces his cupids bow. without spoken words, you know what’s coming. the ghost of his top lip gently pulls in your bottom lip as mark’s mind screams. he just had to. he had to kiss you, there wasn’t anything else in that moment, only a kiss came to mind; finding himself able to show you how he’s been feeling. he connects your lips together like tape meeting the wrapping paper. stuck together and enclosed for a fleeting moment, before it rips open with the way you kiss back, opening his heart. he feels like he’s falling and your kiss is bringing him back to gravity to land in a deep pillow of snow. your hands cold, holding the frame of his face lightly as he brushes his lips against yours again.