quality, ★★★★★

Jesus, look at the size of that thing. Bloody hell. His pumpkin now. 

It took some time for my brain to parse the antlers, and until then, I thought this was a bear.  

Oh, man - while I was in Nova Scotia this weekend my husband’s friend Alec tried to convince me moose were “cute” and “nothing to worry about,” and if that ain’t Canadian culture I don’t know what is.

how did I never once think to use tape fuck

one time as a kid I forcefully shoved two magnets together, and these were the strong magnets my dad used in his shop to pick-up missing little metal bits, and I held them really tightly in the palm of my hand, went up to this one kid who legit said things like “I think black cats are bad, they should be drowned” and drew crosses on the notebooks of kids if she found out they didn’t go to church, I told her “Hey. I’m a witch. If you don’t stop trying to hurt animals and picking on kids, I’ll use my magic to throw you into the sky”, and when she dared to doubt my powers I told her that I had two “rocks” in my hand that I could send across the playground, then I opened my hand the the magnets shot off in two different directions (we were over in a spot that was empty, so no other kids were around, nobody got hurt), one of them stuck to a drainpipe and the other stuck to a fence. This kid SCREAMED, and ran to the office, and I guess had her mom pick her up from school, and then she wasn’t there for a couple of days, finally her mom called my house and claimed I had “traumatized her daughter by performing a terrifying magic trick”, and when my parents asked what I did I just said “I showed her a magnet and she flipped out. She’s not gonna be happy when she finds out about gravity, either”. eventually this kid came back to school and always made a point to come up to me and say “Hey, my mom told me not to talk to you!”, and would just be like “Good job, you already screwed that up”

Holy shit

Glad to see we’re all in agreement that cats talk like disparaged victorian children

not to sound like a boomer but I miss when teen fashion trends where uglier. Seeing 15 yr olds w “instagram face” is just too much for me. lets all just put on too much eyeliner and wear poorly matching layers again.

Vsco girls wearing crocs and scrunchies have it right. Power to them and their overpriced water bottles. I wish them all the sksksksks

thinking about the guy on reddit that posted a pic of a giant water bug he put on his arm after flipping it over because it was on its back

wheres that pic of the person holding a blue ring octopus?

the first time i saw a california king-sized bed i was like “thats absurd who needs a bed that big” but now i understand. i get it. its designed specifically for me, my wife and every single one of our dogs send post

the existence of convenience stores implies the existence of inconvenience stores

I hate having a body, it’s so high maintenance! Shower this, eat that, drink this, sleep that, it’s all very stupid