Despite Everything, Its Still Me

everybody must have thought the first guy to realize wasabi was edible was insane. tears and snot running down his face like “this root is really good on fish and meats, the leaves are also good but sometimes they make you shit yourself”

I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should-

i will die without routine. also this routine is killing me

stardew valley is crazy because imagine moving to a town with a population of like 28 or something and 12 of those people are bisexual and Want You

i think this is what what liberal arts colleges are

Wtf. Just found out the book im reading is a horror novel even though they didn't put "reader beware, you're in for a scare" on the cover. How was i supposed to know

if magic was real i wouldn't be able to resist spending all my spell slots or casting energy or mana or whatever on some trivial shit whenever i felt like it. i'd just have to be craving my favorite drink and that'd be one incantation down without having to think twice.

thinking of getting poisoned later

GORDON RAMSAY: Alright, mate. I’ll forgive the cockup with the soup course, but I want that caprese salad, and if there’s any more forbidden knowledge of the future in it I’m going to need words with the chef de cuisine ME: Absolutely, chef. We have your caprese salad coming out now *additional member of waitstaff brings out a dish on one hand, and lifts the cloche to reveal basil leaves, fresh mozzarella, and slices of San Marzano tomato artfully arranged to spell out “MARCH 15, 2048 - AUTO ACCIDENT”* GORDON RAMSAY: Hold on a moment. Is that when and how I die? ME: I don’t know, chef. It seems at odds with the concept of free will that knowing such a thing would even be possible GORDON RAMSAY: Not even through the antipasti and I’m already being asked to subscribe to a non-deterministic universe. Fuck me

When did we all start accepting the wizard rp as a regular part of this site

"am I being annoying" are you aware that my heart is trying to crawl out of my chest to get to you

kill them with kindness? WRONG! medical malpractice 💉🩸💉🩸💉🩸🩻🫀🩸🫀🩸💉🫀🩸🩻🫀💉🫀💉🫀🩻🩸🩻🫀💉🫀🩸🫀💉🫀🩻💉💉💉💉🩻💉🩻🩸🫀💉🩸🩻💉🩻🩸🫀🩻💉💉💉💉🫀🩻💉🩻🩸🫀🩻💉🫀🩻🫀💉🫀💉🫀🩻🩻🩻🩸🫀💉💉🩻🫀🩸🫀🩻🩻🩻🩻🩸🩻🩻💉🫀🫀🫀