M

She suddenly realized herself, looking down to the IV she'd torn from herself and taking a step back towards Gareth, towards safety, as she cowered from the nurse.

"I can replace it—"

"No," the nurse answered, not unkindly. "Lay back down. You need your rest, Mrs. Mallory. Let me."

Vera nodded mutely. She allowed the nurse to replace her line.

When the nurse finally left them, Vera turned her attention to Gareth. The pain in her eyes was simply impossible to miss. She was not wasting her energy on trying to hide it. "I'm trying, Gareth. I'm trying." Her voice cracked. She leaned her head back against the hospital pillow and tried.

Vera was silent, pensive for a long time. For some, she stared determinedly up at the tiny dots in the ceiling plaster, but for most, her eyes remained shut. She swept tears away, but not for long. After the fourth or fifth swipe, she gave up on that.

Only when she lay back down in bed, Gareth finally sat on the chair again, reaching out to gently take her hand in his. The grip loose, so she could just pull her hand out if she didn't want him to touch her. With his other hand he tenderly wiped the tears from her cheeks once she had given up doing it herself. It broke him to see her like this. Usually Vera was the strong, content woman always with a remark on her lips. Seeing her like this, though...

She bit her lip as she watched him start to calculate how to get up. With a glance above her, she wondered how they would actually get out of here. This wasn’t like the movies and some grand escape plan. That was survival.

When she turned back around, Ophelia saw him jump and reach the edge of the opening. She bent down, carefully using her good arm to do her best to help pull him through. Thankfully he was able to do a lot of it himself too.

“Well, I could certainly do with five minutes here or there to take a break when I’m not assisting you. Villiers and Tanner sometimes make my head feel as if it’s spinning with all their needs.” Not that she minded too much, it made her day go by faster. However, it still proved to be a hectic day when she felt pulled in several directions.

"Hummm is that so?" She knew of course that he had been married young and honestly, she thought the idea of him being nervous was sweet. She was rather glad that he had got that- even if it wasn't them. The idea of him young and optimistic was cute.

It was a night she'd thought on over and over again throughout the years, a night that had played in her head and a night, a time, a feeling she'd grieved for over the years.

She knew the answer, even though she'd asked the question, she already knew the answer. Had she been worth the potentially getting in trouble to him? She thought he'd say yes, no she knew he would. Unless he was teasing.

"It might give us more insight, because, if it's revenge that needs to be handled different to infatuation. The damage control for one is different." Maria took a breath. "I think-" Maria looked away from him for a minute before looking back. "I'm not saying it wasn't hard for you or you didn't get punished but it might have been harder for her, being a woman, that sort of thing. The whispers, the damage it can do to your reputation, the things people say about you...."

"As a woman it follows you around." She tried to explain.

He bit into his toast, gaze on Maria. Then, slowly, his hand sank. In all honesty, he had never looked at it from that angle. Maria knew, though: she had been in the same position. Well, now he felt like an asshole. “It really is that much harder for women, isn’t it?” Gareth asked. It was ridiculous, really, especially nowadays. Both parties were at fault, there was no room of discussion in his eyes. “I have a feeling just talking to her won’t really help…especially talking to her alone. On the other hand, shall we really involve HR in this? It might backfire.”

"She did." Maria smiled at him. "At first she was mad at you and then as we talked she started to look at things from a different angle and she was just, she talked about you so fondly and defended you so deeply." Maria explained to him, she didn't know how else to show him. He wasn't there when they sat around the table talking for after work drinks or at dinner time. He didn't see the fondness they all had for him, even with his stubborn and stoic ways.

They cared about him. Even with everything that had happened they still cared about him.

"Do you think the.... vibe...." God she hated that word but she couldn't quite find the right one now. "...you're feeling from her could actually be her concern for you? She has asked me if you're doing okay after everything. I'm not the only one who worries about you, and it's not because you're head of MI6."