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a shimmer in the dark when you're afraid / fear not the dark
2026 COLOR CHALLENGE: JULY & GREEN
⤷ THEME & CHALLENGE: SUMMER HITS & CURRENT SUMMER ANTHEM
All That I've Ever Known (2026) / Afraid of the Dark (2026) by Motionless in White
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
warnings: i guess i was ovulating and wrote 4k words of just filth! smut (unprotected sex, use of toys (vibrator), multiple orgasms, gentle choking, spanking, blowjob, noah’s a little rough, a few people have mentioned velvet!noah would be a pleasure dom and i’ve never agreed with anything more!!)
if you saw this before the actual chapter no you didn't!! don't read this until you've read the chapter!!... or just read it anyway! it works as a oneshot <3 like always, i haven't read this back because i simply can't or i'll delete the whole thing, so i hope there aren't too many mistakes, i wrote this over three nights and cringed every time i read through it to find where i left off...
・┈・୨୧・┈・
You stood there for a moment, your heart racing in your chest as you took in the sight of him- naked, masked, looking so powerful as he slowly teased his cock with the vibrator you bought. The black mask on his face made everything feel different. More thrilling, more dangerous in the best way.
Noah didn’t rush you. He just watched you with dark eyes, patient but clearly hungry, and the quiet buzzing of the vibrator was the only sound that filled the room besides your own heavy breathing. Finally, you reached up and unwrapped the towel. It fell to the floor with a soft thud, leaving you completely bare in front of him. A small, nervous smirk tugged at your lips as you met his gaze through the mask.
You slowly climbed onto the bed and crawled towards him on all fours, sensually but still a little cautious, like you were approaching something wild. You weren’t sure just how far he would take it tonight, you remember telling him you wanted him to be more rough in bed… so maybe that was his plan tonight?
When you reached him, you straddled his lap, hovering by his tummy, just above his hard cock, your hands resting gently on his chest.
Noah didn’t touch you right away. He looked at you for a moment, his eyes still dark and hungry behind the mask. One hand was still lazily stroking the vibrator along his cock, but his focus was now entirely on you.
Before anything else, he asked you a simple question.
“Do you remember the colour system, princess?”
You nodded, a little breathless already.
“Tell me,” he said gently but firmly. “Recite it for me.”
You swallowed.
“Green means keep going… yellow means slow down or check in… red means stop immediately.” You said a little breathlessly.
Noah’s eyes softened just slightly with approval, though the mask still made him look a little scary.
“Good girl,” he smiled, his voice warm with praise. “And you know you can use any of them at any time, right? No matter what. I want you to feel safe, even when I’m being rough with you tonight.”
He finally switched the vibrator off and set it aside before he reached for you, his hands settling carefully on your hips. His touch was gentle for now.. his thumbs brushing circles on your skin as he held you there, hovering over his cock.
He tilted his head, studying you through the mask.
“You still want this?” He asked, voice low but caring. “You want me to be rough with you tonight? To take control?”
You nodded again, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Yes. Please.”
Noah’s grip on your hips tightened just the slightest, not enough to hurt, but enough to remind you who was in charge.
Without another word, he flipped you onto your back and shoved you down into the mattress. You gasped as your back hit the sheets, and befote you could even react, he was between your thighs, keeping them spread wide with his body so you couldn’t close your legs. He pinned both of your wrists above your head in one large, strong hand, holding you firmly in place.
Now you were completely at his mercy.
Noah hovered over you, and his eyes locked onto yours through the mask as he held you down.
“Colour, baby?” He asked, his voice soft even as his grip on your wrists stayed firm. You were already breathing faster, your heart racing with anticipation.
“Green,” you whispered. Then again, more sure, “Green, green, green.”
Noah’s eyes softened with approval behind the mask, and he smirked.
“That’s my good girl.”
He reached beside you and picked up the vibrator again. He turned it on to a low setting, the soft buzz of it filling the room. Instead of going straight for your clit, like you thought he would, he started teasing you.
He dragged the buzzing head slowly up your side, making you shiver. Then to your breasts, circling one nipple, then the other. The vibrations made your nipples harden almost instantly, and he took his time, pressing the toy against each until you were squirming beneath him.
“Stay still for me.” He said softly, but his grip on your wrists tightened just enough to remind you who was in control.
He moved the vibrator lower, tracing it across your tummy, then down to your inner thighs. The teasing was driving you mad. You tried to arch up, to chase more contact, but he kept you pinned, and he watched every reaction, with a devilish smirk on his lips.
Finally, he dragged the vibrating head down to your mound, pressing it just above your clit, letting you feel the buzz so close but not quite where you needed it. You whimpered, hips moving desperately.
Noah then leaned down, the soft mask brushing your ear as he whispered,
“You wanted me rough tonight, didn’t you, princess?”
He pressed the vibrator firmly against your clit, then suddenly turned the intensity of it up.
The sudden, strong vibrations made your whole body jolt. A loud moan tore from your throat as he held it there, not moving or teasing, he just let it buzz against your most sensitive spot while he kept you pinned beneath him.
“That’s it, be a good girl and take it.” He whispered, his voice low and sweet but full of control.
He watched you through the mask as your body started to tense, your hips wriggling desperately. Just as you were right on the edge, about to cum, your thighs shaking, he pulled the vibrator away. You let out a broken, frustrated whimper, trying to close your legs. Noah chuckled darkly, and spread his thighs a little more to keep your legs even wider apart.
“Uh-uh, sweetheart,” he smirked, his voice now dripping with teasing dominance. “You don’t get to cum yet. I’m in charge tonight… so you’re going to take what I give you.”
He waited just long enough for your breathing to calm slightly, then pressed the vibrator back against your swollen clit. The sudden return of the intense vibrations made you cry out, your back arching hard off the bed.
You squirmed beneath him, trying again to close your legs, but he held you open so easily and effortlessly, his own body keeping you spread and helpless.
Noah chuckled again, darker this time, clearly enjoying your desperation.
“Look at you,” he said softly, almost mockingly sweet. “You’re so fucking cute when you’re this needy.”
He edged you once again, bringing you right to the brink with the powerful toy, only to pull it away at the last second. You sobbed, your hips raising to chase the vibrator desperately, but he kept it just out of reach, watching you fall apart with dark eyes.
“Please…” you whimpered, your voice breaking. But Noah leaned down, the mask brushing your ear again,
“Not yet, baby. I think I want to watch you just a little more.”
He pressed the vibrator back onto your clit for the third time, holding it there as he watched you tremble. Your thighs shook, your legs tried uselessly to close around him again. The want and denial had you crying out, tears slipping down your cheeks.
But this time, as you felt your orgasm build again, he didn’t pull away.
“That’s it, cum for me, princess,” he said. “Right now.”
You whined, your back arching as your pussy clenched around nothing, and your thighs shook uncontrollably. Noah kept the vibrator pressed hard against your clit through the entire orgasm, drawing it out until you were a sobbing, trembling mess beneath him.
Only when you started to come down, whimpering and oversensitive, did he finally pull the toy away. He let go of your wrists and gathered you into his arms, holding you close against his chest as you shook.
He kissed your forehead through the mask, voice suddenly much softer.
“You did so well, baby… so good for me.”
His hand gently stroked your back while you trembled against him. He kissed you again and whispered softly,
“You okay, princess? Want more?”
You nodded, still breathing hard.
“Yes… please.”
Noah’s eyes darkened again, and he gave you a satisfied smile.
“Good girl,” he whispered. “Get on top and ride me, baby. I want to watch you take my cock.”
You moved shakily, your legs still weak from the how intense your orgasm was. But you straddled his hips, your hands pressing against his chest for balance as he reached down and lined himself up. With a soft whimper, you slowly sank down onto his thick cock, taking him inch by inch until he was buried completely inside you.
You paused for a moment, adjusting to the fullness, your hands trembling on his chest. Noah groaned deeply, his hands sliding up your thighs to grip your hips.
“Fuck, you always look so pretty like this,” he said, voice rough but full of praise. “Sitting on my cock.”
Then he started thrusting up into you. It was gentle at first, slow and deep… then it became hard.
His hips snapped upwards, driving his cock deep into you while he held you down on him. You cried out, your body jolting with every powerful thrust, because Noah didn’t let you set the pace. He took control from below, fucking you with deep, rough strokes. He even slapped your ass, not too hard but certainly not gentle, and the sharp sting made you clench around him.
“That’s it, baby,” he growled, his voice low and filthy. “Just sit there and look pretty while I fuck you. You feel so fucking good.”
He groped your tits with rough hands, squeezing and pinching your nipples as he continued to thrust up into you, his cock slamming deep with every snap of his hips. The mix of pleasure and the lingering sting of his hand on your ass had you moaning loudly, your nails digging into his chest to attempt to steady yourself.
Noah kept praising you between rough thrusts and spanks, and he remembered what you told him- so never once did he say a degrading word.
“Look at you… taking my cock so well. Such a good fucking girl for me. Your tits look so pretty bouncing like this while I fuck you.”
He slapped your ass again, harder this time, then reached for your tits, rolling your nipples between his fingers as he pounded into you from below. God, his hands felt so good, no matter where on you they were.
You were a moaning, trembling mess on top of him, barely able to keep up with any rhythm as the pleasure began to overwhelm you.
“Noah… more…” You gasped, your eyes already starting to roll back.
Noah’s hand shot up instantly. He grabbed your face in one large hand, squishing your cheeks together firmly as he forced you to look at him.
“Nuh-uh, baby,” he growled through the mask, “Eyes on me.”
You whimpered, struggling to keep your eyes focused on him as he continued thrusting up into you.
“You want more?” He asked, still holding your face. “Then you’re going to look at me while I give it to you.”
He smoothly flipped you onto your back again. He hooked your legs over his shoulders, folding you in half as he shoved his cock back inside you in one deep thrust. The new angle made him hit even deeper, making you cry out.
Noah wrapped one hand around your throat, he didn't squeeze tight, he just applied the most dizzying pressure, before he started fucking you hard.
“Colour, princess?” He asked again, his voice rough but he still made sure he was checking in, just to see where you were at. You could barely speak through the overwhelming pleasure, but you managed to gasp out,
“Green… green-“
Noah’s grip on your throat tightened just a little more as he pounded into you, the mask making him look almost feral.
“Good girl.” He growled, slamming into you harder.
He suddenly pulled out, making you whimper at the sudden emptiness. But before you could protest, he flipped you onto your stomach with rough hands, yanking your hips up so your ass was high in the air.
He grabbed the wand from beside you and turned it on to a higher setting this time. Without any warning, he pressed the buzzing head hard against your swollen, overstimulated clit and shoved his thick cock back inside you with one hard, sudden thrust.
You whimpered loud into the mattress as he started fucking you from behind. Then Noah fisted your hair and yanked your head back sharply, arching your back as he fucked you harder.
“Colour?” he growled through the mask, still checking in even as he destroyed you.
“G-green!” You sobbed, barely able to speak.
He spanked your ass hard, the sharp sting blooming across your skin as he continued pounding into you. His hips snapped against you with such force, his cock hitting so deep it made your eyes roll back, and the vibrator never left your clit, only making the sensations more overwhelming.
Noah then leaned over your back, and growled,
“You wanted rough, princess. So I’m going to fuck you until you can’t walk tomorrow.”
He spanked you again, harder, his thrusts growing even more savage and animalistic. You were shaking, and sobbing with pleasure as another orgasm built fast, and Noah could feel it.
“Cum for me,” he ordered, voice rough. “Right fucking now. I want to feel this pussy squeeze around my cock.”
He spanked you one more time, and turned the vibrator up once more as your orgasm ripped through you, your whole body trembling as you came hard, but Noah didn’t stop. He kept fucking you through it.
“Oh, was that the best you can do?” He teased. “No, baby… you can cum harder than that for me.”
Before you could catch your breath, he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you up so your back was flush against his chest. He kept one arm wrapped around your waist to hold you in place while his other hand brought the vibrator back to your clit, pressing it firmly against your swollen, oversensitive nub.
The second the strong vibrations hit your clit, you cried out again, louder this time, but Noah didn’t give you any mercy. He thrust into you hard and deep, his thick cock hitting the most delicious spots from this new angle.
“Fuck!” You sobbed, your body jolting with every thrust, and your head rolled back, resting against his shoulder.
Then his hand slid up from your waist and wrapped around your throat again.
“That’s it, baby,” he growled through the mask, his voice rough and dark. “Take my cock like a good girl. I want to feel you cum harder this time. Think you can do that for me?”
You desperately nodded, though your head was spinning from the pressure around your throat combined with every other sensation.
“Show me, pretty girl. Cum for me again.”
He pressed the vibrator even more firmly against your clit as he fucked into you, his hand tight around your throat, and you came again with a broken moan, your whole body trembling and your thighs shaking as the orgasm hit you even harder than before.
Noah groaned deeply, still thrusting into you through your orgasm, not slowing down for a second.
“Good… good girl,” he praised, drawing out the words, his voice rough and thick with lust. “That’s what I wanted.”
Then he started to slow his thrusts, still buried deep inside you, and loosened his grip on your throat.
“Colour?” He asked yet again, his voice suddenly full of care.
You were shaking, breathing hard, but you managed to whisper,
“Green… but j-just give me a moment… please.”
Noah immediately stopped moving. He pulled the vibrator away from your clit and wrapped both arms around you, holding you close against his chest from behind.
“Of course, baby,” he whispered softly. “Take all the time you need. I’ve got you.”
He stayed buried inside you but didn’t thrust. Instead, he showered you with gentle kisses- along your shoulder, the back of your neck, your jaw. His hands moved down and stroked your sore, red ass tenderly, massaging the stinging skin with soothing circles.
“You did so well,” he whispered between kisses. “You took me so beautifully. My strong, perfect girl.”
He kept kissing you softly, his lips warm and soft and patient, while his hands continued their gentle massage on your ass and back. He waited until your breathing slowed and your body relaxed against him.
When you finally nodded, whispering “I’m ready,” Noah kissed your neck one more time. Then he laid back and gently guided you into his lap again so you were straddling him, facing him. He held you close as he slowly lowered you onto his cock, sinking you down until he was buried deep inside you again.
You whimpered at the fullness, still so sensitive.
Noah reached for the vibrator and pressed it back against your clit- this time on an even higher speed. The strong and intense vibrations made you cry out, your body jerking against him.
“Oh baby, I know…” he cooed softly, his voice full of sweet condescension as he wrapped one arm around your waist to hold you in place. “It’s so sensitive, isn’t it? But it feels so good, doesn’t it?”
He started thrusting up into you, slow and deep this time. The vibrator buzzed against your overstimulated clit while his cock filled you completely, making you whimper and moan, burying your face in his neck as the overwhelming pleasure built again.
Noah kissed your shoulder and whispered against your skin,
“That’s my good girl… just take it for me. I love how you tremble when I push you like this.”
He kept fucking deep, with hard but slow thrusts, the vibrator never leaving your clit as he held you close in his lap.
“Just one more, okay? Think you can do that?”
You were whimpering helplessly as the overwhelming pleasure kept building.
“I can’t… Noah, I can’t cum again.” You gasped, your voice breaking.
Noah’s arm tightened around your waist, holding you down on his cock as he kept thrusting up into you. His voice stayed soft but firm against your ear.
“No, baby… you can,” he said sweetly. “I know you can. Just one more for me. You’re doing so so well.”
You whined pathetically, overwhelmed and oversensitive, but your body kept responding to him. Noah slowed his thrusts again just enough to check in, his hand gently cupping your cheek.
“Colour, princess?” he asked, voice low and caring.
“Green…” you breathed, then nodded because you were barely able to speak. “Green…”
Noah’s eyes softened with pride behind the mask, then before he could say or do anything, you started to rock your hips. The vibrator was pressed between your bodies, the buzzing head nestled right against your clit. Noah noticed so stopped thrusting completely, instead he let you roll your hips, grinding your clit harder against the toy with every movement.
Your eyes fluttered shut, head falling forward as the overwhelming pleasure took over. Your heart was racing, breathing shaky. Noah felt so good inside you- thick and warm and deep- while the vibrator buzzed relentlessly against your poor, sensitive, swollen clit.
“That’s it, princess,” he whispered softly, his hands resting on your hips, guiding your movements gently. “You like that? Just rock on me. Nice and slow, yeah? Feel how deep I am?”
You whimpered, grinding harder against the vibrator with each roll of your hips. The combination of his cock stretching you and the strong, steady vibrations on your clit was pushing you closer and closer to the edge once more.
Noah kept one arm wrapped around your back, holding you close against his chest as you rocked on him. He kissed your temple, your cheek, your shoulder- giving you soft, loving kisses while you chased your pleasure.
“You’re doing so well, baby,” he whispered tenderly. “I can feel how close you are, squeezing so tight around me. Just let it build. Don’t fight it... just give it to me.”
You came with a broken cry, your whole body shaking as you fell completely forward against his chest. Your pussy clenched rhythmically around his cock as wave after wave of such intense pleasure rolled through you. Soft whimpers and whines spilled from your lips as you trembled in his arms.
But Noah didn’t move the vibrator.
He kept it there, pressed firmly against your oversensitive clit, letting the strong vibrations drag your orgasm out longer. You whimpered louder, squirming in his lap as the overstimulation started to border on too much.
“N-noah…” You whined, voice shaky.
He kissed your shoulder softly, still holding you close.
“Yeah, baby?” He asked gently.
“Yellow…” You whimpered.
Noah immediately turned the vibrator off and set it aside. He wrapped both arms around you, holding you tightly against his chest as you trembled and caught your breath.
“Shhh, I’ve got you,” he whispered, pressing soft kisses to your hair and temple. “You did so well, baby. So perfect for me. Just breathe. I’m right here.”
He stayed buried deep inside you, rubbing your back in slow, soothing strokes while you came down in his arms. You were still trembling, breathing hard but he held you softly until your shaking eased.
When you finally relaxed against his chest, he tilted your chin up softly and looked at you with dark, hungry eyes.
“I haven’t cum yet, princess,” he said, his voice low and affectionate. “Will you be a good girl and let me finish in your mouth? You can say no if you want, I’ll go sort myself out in the bathroom, but-
You didn’t let him finish his sentence, you nodded, still dazed and fucked out, but eager to please him after he just made you feel that fucking good.
Noah smiled softly and helped you move, guiding you down between his thighs. You crawled between his legs on shaky arms, your body still sensitive and trembling from everything he’d done to you.
You wrapped your hand around his thick, glistening cock- still rock hard and covered in your slick- and took him into your mouth. The taste of yourself was all over him, salty-sweet and messy. You moaned around his cock as you started sucking him, slow and sloppy, your tongue swirling around the head before taking him deeper.
Noah groaned, one hand gently resting on the back of your head.
“Fuck, baby… that’s so good,” he praised softly. “Look at you… can you taste yourself on my cock?”
You hummed, and sucked him messily, spit and your slick dripping down to his balls as you bobbed your head. You were still so fucked out- your eyes glossy and dazed, movements a little uncoordinated- but you wanted to make him feel good. You wanted to make him feel amazing.
Noah’s breathing grew heavier. His hand tightened in your hair, and he started guiding you a little more firmly, thrusting shallowly into your mouth.
“If it’s too much, tap my thigh twice, okay?” He said, his voice rough but still caring.
You hummed around him in acknowledgment, then he started thrusting a little deeper, fucking your mouth slowly, his grip in your hair tightening. Spit dripped down your chin as you took him deeper, gagging softly but not pulling away.
Noah groaned loudly, his eyes falling shut for a moment as he fucked your face.
“Such a good fucking girl,” he praised, voice strained with pleasure. “Taking my cock so well… just like that, baby.”
He thrust a little harder, holding you in place as he chased his release, the wet, sloppy sounds of your mouth filling the room.
You still took him eagerly, sucking and slurping messily around his thick cock even as it pushed deeper. You gagged hard when he hit the back of your throat, but you didn’t pull away. Instead, you moaned around him, spit dripping down your chin as you tried to take more.
“Fuck, baby… you’re so perfect. My perfect, pretty girl.” Noah groaned.
Tears rolled down your cheeks as you gagged again, pulling off for a second, but you kept sucking him, your tongue swirling messily whenever you could. Your hands gripped his thighs, not pushing him away, but just holding on as he used your warm, wet mouth.
Noah’s breathing grew even more ragged. You looked up at him through your lashes, and you could tell by the way his tummy was tensing and tightening that he was close.
“Fuck.. I’m gonna cum,” he growled, and you felt his cock throb on your tongue. “Swallow it all for me, princess. You’re so fucking good to me…”
Then, with a deep, guttural groan, he thrust deep into your mouth once more and came hard. You took him in your hand, pumping his length as thick, hot spurts of cum landed on your tongue, your lips, a little on your chin. Then you took the head into your mouth and gently sucked, before swallowing around him, not wanting to waste a drop.
Noah kept his cock in your mouth through every pulse, groaning softly as you milked him for all he had.
When he finally finished, he slowly pulled out, strings of spit and cum connecting your swollen lips to his cock. You pressed one last little kiss to his tip as he looked down at you- teary eyed and messy, but still so eager- and stroked your cheek with his thumb.
“You were so fucking good for me, baby,” he whispered, voice soft with praise. “Come here.”
He pulled you up into his arms, holding you close against his chest as you caught your breath. He cradled you like you were the most precious thing in his world. He pulled the covers around both of you and held you close, one hand gently stroking your back while the other cradled the back of your head.
“Shhh, I’ve got you, baby,” he whispered softly, pressing gentle kisses to your forehead, your cheeks, your temple. “You did so, so well. I’m so so proud of you.”
You were still dazed, breathing softly against his neck, your body trembling from the intensity of everything. But Noah kept kissing you, sweet little tender kisses all over your face and shoulders, bringing you back to earth with his warmth and touch.
“I’m so proud of you.” He said genuinely, his voice full of adoration.
He rocked you gently in his arms, one hand rubbing slow circles on your back while the other brushed sweat damp hair out of your face.
“My pretty girl,” he whispered, kissing the tip of your nose. “You’re so pretty when you cum for me… so pretty when you’re all fucked out and trembling in my arms like this. You’re so strong, so beautiful.”
He pressed a long, lingering kiss to your lips, then rested his forehead against yours, holding you even closer.
“You’re safe, princess. I’ve got you. Just breathe with me, okay? In… and out.”
He kept kissing you softly between words- on your forehead, your eyelids, your cheeks, your mouth- while his hands never stopped their gentle, soft touches.
“You did everything right,” he whispered again, voice full of warmth. “You were perfect. My perfect, beautiful girl. I’m so lucky you trust me like this.”
He held you tighter, letting you bury your face in his neck. His voice stayed soft and reassuring the whole time.
“I’ve got you, baby. Just rest. You’re safe. You’re loved.”
masterlist ☆ wc: 11.5k ☆ chapter warnings: NSFW at the end, (noah's in nothing but a mask... however, the actual smut scene itself is 4k words and wouldn’t fit into this chapter so it is linked at the end!)
i’m so so happy with this chapter! it was so fun to write, and i’m just so proud of it!!
・┈・୨୧・┈・
You didn’t really know what to expect after agreeing to this kind of relationship, but things were still normal. If anything, life seemed more peaceful. There weren’t pages of rules suddenly handed over to you or expectations to suddenly be obedient to him. Instead, it was just little things.
When work really overwhelmed you again on Wednesday, you didn’t spend the drive home pretending to be fine. You climbed into Noah’s car, shut the door and before he could even ask, you let out a long, tired sigh.
“Today was awful.” You told him, and he simply reached over and took your hand, giving it a soft squeeze.
“I’m sorry, baby.” He frowned, and simply just getting that off your chest already made you feel better.
When you got back, Noah sent you upstairs to shower and change into something comfy before dinner, and when you came back down the stairs he called you into the kitchen.
“...Come here.” He said, holding his arms open for you.
You crossed the room and let him pull you against his chest. He held you for a long moment, his hand gently rubbing against your back.
“Wanna tell me about it?”
So you did, you told him all about the espresso machine breaking, and how all the oat milk had gone off, and how you had to go into the bathroom and cry for fifteen minutes.
He had a great solution to it. He told you that after dinner he would make you both a hot chocolate, you’d go up to bed and put on a movie or TV show and cuddle. If you wanted him to use his fingers or his mouth to switch your mind off before going to sleep then he would… but an hour into the movie, he looked down at you cuddled up to his chest, and you were already softly snoring.
On Thursday, he came to visit you at work, which was a surprise. He didn’t tell you he was planning on coming in, but you smiled the second you saw him hold the door open for an elderly lady before stepping in.
He was dressed casually today, wearing a pair of black joggers and a navy hoodie, with a black baseball cap on his head. The moment his eyes found yours, a little smile appeared on his lips. Not enough that anyone else would notice, it was just for you.
“Well,” Tom smirked, leaning against the counter, “You didn’t tell me Mr Millionaire was coming in- ow!”
You elbowed him, telling him to behave. He shook his head, but grinned to himself as he wandered away to wipe down one of the tables.
You were still serving another customer, so while you made their cappuccino, you wondered how you were supposed to act? Do you treat Noah like he’s just another customer, or like he was Noah?...
Your Noah.
You mentally winced at yourself, don’t start thinking like that.
But then you handed the drink over, the customer paid, and Noah stepped up to the counter next, resting his forearm against it.
“Hi.”
“Hi.” You replied, trying to stop the shy little smile spreading across your face- though he noticed it anyway.
“So…” He began softly, and your eyes widened a little as you waited for him to continue, “You gonna ask what I want?”
You chuckled, feeling your cheeks start to heat up.
“I already know what you want.” You smiled.
“Good girl.” He said casually as he reached for his wallet, making you feel a little dizzy. You reached for a cup, trying not to let it show how it affected you.
“Anything else?”
“Hm…” He pretended to think, “Well, I hear the barista’s pretty cute.”
Your heart fluttered for a second, but you tried to shake it off.
“So what brings you here?” You asked as you began grinding coffee beans.
“I was nearby.” He shrugged.
“No you weren’t.” You smirked.
“Fine…” he sighed, “The coffee's better here than the cafe by my place.”
“Oh yeah? Is that all?"
“Mm, and I wanted to see you.”
Your hands stopped just for a second, before continuing.
“I’m heading to Davis’s after this, we’ve got to sort some stuff before tour, since it’s only a couple weeks away.”
You nodded your head.
“You not getting him a drink?”
Noah scoffed.
“He still owes me for lunch a couple days ago. If he wants coffee he can get one himself.”
You smiled to yourself, and began to work the espresso machine. Noah watched you, it really fascinated him, the way you knew exactly what to do, how you remembered regulars’ orders and gave all your customers that little smile, even on days where you felt like shit.
“You’re good at this.” Noah said, while you were staring into the distance waiting for the espresso machine.
“Hm?” You glanced over at him.
“You’re good at your job.”
You smiled.
“Thank you.”
Then, the elderly lady he’d held the door open for shuffled over beside him.
“Oh!” She smiled at you, “Is this your boyfriend, darling?”
Your eyes widened.
“Uh…”
Before you could answer, Noah spoke.
“Not yet.” He smirked, “I’ve still got a lot to prove.”
The woman laughed.
“Well, I’d say you’re doing rather well, dear.”
You felt your face burn again, while Noah stood there looking rather pleased with himself.
“I’ll take that.” He smiled
The lady picked up an extra sugar for her coffee with a cheerful smile before wandering away, and you looked back up at Noah.
“You enjoyed that.”
“Maybe a little.” He smirked, then you slid his coffee across the counter.
“Here.”
He took it with a grateful smile.
“Thank you, baby.”
Your stomach flipped, and you almost forgot what you were typing into the machine.
“Noah, I’m at work!” You hissed under your breath.
“What’s the issue?” He asked, looking entirely innocent, “You’re my baby everywhere.”
“I’m trying to be professional.” You said, trying not to smile as you looked up at him over the counter. “Your total’s 4.60.”
“I thought you were going to give me employee discount.” He smirked.
“You don’t work here.”
“I could.”
“You’d last about ten minutes.” You scoffed, making him chuckle as he tapped his card against the reader.
The machine beeped, and a big approved appeared on the screen. Then when the tip option appeared, you didn’t think anything of it. You assumed he wouldn’t tip above the minimum, now you’re living in his house rent free, now he’s flown you to Paris and bought you countless amounts of things.
“You don’t have to tip me, Noah.”
“I know.” He said simply, before tapping the ‘custom amount’ option.
You didn’t look. You turned around with a huff, and before you knew it, the machine beeped again.
Tip: $100
“Noah!” You hissed.
“What?” He smirked, “You look pretty when you’re working.” He said as he picked his cup back up, “Have a good day, sweetheart. See you at six.”
And before you could even come up with an argument for that, he turned around and left.
…
By the time Friday evening rolled around, you already noticed a change in yourself. You felt lighter than you had in months, so clearly Noah’s plan had worked, and this was helping.
Noah had been working in the studio, though he told you he'd stop at 9 so you could both cuddle in bed and put something on the TV.
“Baby?”
You looked up from where you’d stolen his corner of the sofa, not expecting to see him for another hour.
“Hm?” You hummed.
“Tommorow morning,” he leaned against the doorway, reminding you just how fucking tall he was, “I need you to pack an overnight bag.”
“What for?” You asked.
“Well, you got through the week, didn’t you? I said I had a surprise…” He smirked, “We’re staying in a hotel for the night, and make sure you pack something you’d wear to a concert.”
“A concert?” Your curiosity peaked.
He just smiled, and slowly shook his head.
“I’ve already said too much.”
“Noah-”
“We’re leaving just after lunch. And no, I’m not telling you where we’re going… just trust me. You’re gonna love it.”
He seemed pleased with himself as he pushed himself off the doorway and headed into the kitchen, grabbing a drink before disappearing back into the studio. You heard the door click shut, and a cheeky smile spread across your face.
You had an idea…
After a few minutes, Noah was back at his desk, headphones around his neck as he tapped away on his keyboard. He barely had time to look up before you wandered into the room.
“...Hi.”
He smiled, looking up at you.
“Hi.”
Without saying a word, you walked over and carefully settled yourself in his lap, looking down at him with your most innocent smile. His hands found your waist, and he looked up at you, a little taken back by your sudden confidence.
“Well,” he smiled, “This is nice.”
You tried not to giggle, and instead combed your fingers through his soft hair.
“I need something.”
“I gathered.” He leaned back in his chair, spreading his legs a little more so you were more comfortable as his thumbs brushed over your hips, “What can I do for you?”
You rested your hands on his shoulders, tilting your head sweetly as you asked,
“Can I borrow your credit card?”
His eyes widened.
“...My credit card?”
You nodded your head, and he just looked at you for a moment, almost like he couldn’t believe what you had just said.
“You know, we’ve been doing this for so long…” a lazy grin spread across his face, “And I don’t think I’ve ever heard those words come out of your mouth once.”
You chuckled, twirling a strand of his hair around your finger.
“Well, I was thinking about going shopping tomorrow morning, before we leave. Y’know, get a new outfit for the mystery concert…”
“Of course, baby. What time should we go?”
You shook your head.
“Nuh-uh, you’re staying here.” You smirked, poking his chest. “I wanna surprise you with something.”
He studied your face for a second.
“Should I be worried?”
“No.” You bit back a smile.
“Should my bank account be worried?”
“...Maybe a little.” You smirked, and he chuckled.
“You’ve become suspiciously comfortable spending my money all of a sudden. You argued with me for twenty minutes in Paris when I wanted you to buy those diamond earrings.”
You shrugged, trying to look casual.
“You told me to stop feeling guilty”
“I did.”
“So…” You smiled sweetly. “…I thought I’d be a good girl and listen.”
“…You know exactly what you’re doing, don’t you?” He smirked, his hands rubbing your hips.
“I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Liar.” He smiled, but still reached into his pocket for his wallet, before sliding the black card between your fingers. “There’s one condition.”
You looked up expectantly.
“I want you to spoil yourself. There’s no limit on that card, so I don’t want you buying cheaper versions of things or knock offs. I want my girl to have the best, and nothing less.”
“Yes sir.” You giggled.
He leaned forward to kiss your forehead.
“I trust you.”
You smiled to yourself as you tucked the card safely into your pocket. If only he knew exactly where you were planning to take it…
…
The next morning, Noah let you take his car to go shopping. He had a few things he had to do at home, so he didn’t mind staying behind. He kissed you goodbye at the door and told you to take your time and buy whatever you wanted.
But he had no idea where you were about to step into...
You’d never been to a physical sex shop before. You’d bought a vibrator online a couple of years ago, and it had been fine- discreet packaging, no awkward eye contact. But this time, you had to go into the store.
You wanted to surprise Noah with something new, something you could both enjoy. He’d mentioned wanting to try toys with you, and the thought had been living in your head ever since.
You felt more excited than nervous when you pulled into the parking lot, but then you walked through the door...
The shop was bigger and brighter than you expected. The hot pink walls were lined with shelves upon shelves of toys in every possible shape, color, and size. Your eyes widened as you took it all in.
To your left was a whole wall of dildos- realistic ones with veins and balls, vibrating ones, thrusting ones, even double-ended ones. Some were monstrously large, others curved in ways that made you blush just by looking at them. Next to them were displays of butt plugs in every size, some made of metal, some of silicone, some with pretty sparkly jeweled bases.
Further down the aisle were vibrators- wands, bullets, rabbits, suction toys that promised to “make you squirt”, though you scoffed at the thought of it, thinking yeah right. There were even fucking machines on display in the back corner, intimidating metal contraptions with attachments that scared you a little, making you swallow hard as you looked away.
The lingerie section was just as overwhelming- tiny lace sets that barely covered anything, latex sets that covered everything, crotchless panties, babydolls, leather harnesses, and bodysuits with cutouts.
You felt your cheeks burning hotter with every step. A couple browsed the BDSM section nearby- nipple clamps, paddles, ropes, blindfolds, and something called a “spreader bar” that made your stomach flip. Everything felt so… explicit. So shameless. You weren’t even sure just what type of toys Noah would want… or where to even start.
You stood frozen in the middle of the vibrator aisle, clutching the strap of your handbag over your shoulder. A woman walked past you holding a box with a massive purple dildo on it and a big bottle of lube like it was no big deal. You suddenly felt so out of place... so innocent.
God, I wish Noah was here, you thought, your cheeks burning. He would’ve known exactly what to pick. He would’ve stood behind you, whispering in your ear which toys he wanted to use on you, teasing you about how wet you were getting just by looking at them.
Instead, you were alone, flustered, and trying not to stare too long at a suction toy that promised “intense clitoral orgasms.”
You swallowed hard and forced yourself to pick up the safest option to start with- a simple wand vibrator. The same kind you’d seen before in porn, and much bigger than the bullet you owned a couple years ago. You could already imagine Noah holding it against your clit while he fucked you, and your thighs pressed together in the middle of the store.
You quickly grabbed it and headed toward the register before you could overthink it any more, your face burning the entire way.
…
By the time you finally got home, pulling onto Noah’s driveway, you couldn’t help but feel a little giddy over what was sitting in the black bag in the passenger seat. Before getting out of the car, you tucked the bag into your handbag so nothing looked suspicious… then you made your way inside.
“Noah?”
“I’m upstairs, baby!”
You slipped off your shoes, carefully hung your jacket up with his, and headed upstairs. His bedroom door was already open, and as you stepped inside, you found him kneeling on the floor with a suitcase lying open on the bed. Clothes were folded into neat piles, there were a couple pairs of trousers, t-shirts, his toiletries bag…
“You’ve started packing without me.” You frowned.
He glanced over his shoulder, smiling.
“I got bored waiting.”
“I’ve only been twenty minutes!” You chuckled.
“Mm, it was a very long twenty minutes.”
You laughed, walking over before leaning down to kiss the top of his head. He hummed happily at the affection before pulling one of his drawers open. Inside, were neatly folded up pairs of black, grey and white Calvin Kleins. He took a couple pairs… but then something caught your eye.
Tucked towards the back of the drawer, was black fabric, but this didn’t look like another pair of underwear. You screwed your face up, tilting your head.
“…What’s that?”
Noah paused.
“What?”
You pointed into the drawer.
“Behind your boxers.”
He followed your finger, then smiled to himself.
“Oh… that.”
He reached in and pulled it out, and you watched it unfold into a black ski mask.
“Noah..?” You chuckled, in disbelief, “Why do you have a mask in your underwear drawer?”
He laughed, smiling at it fondly.
“It’s not for robbing banks.”
“Well, that would explain a lot.”
He shook his head, still smiling.
“It’s one of my old stage masks.”
You stared at it.
“…Your what?”
“Mhm.” He turned it over in his hands. “I used to wear it on stage a couple years ago.”
“No…” You looked between the mask and him. “…You did?”
“Yep.”
“Why?”
He laughed.
“I just thought it looked cool.”
You reached out.
“…Can I?”
He handed it over without hesitation, and the first thing you noticed was how the fabric was incredibly soft. You noticed it said BAD OMENS around the neck, and you tried to imagine him wearing it on stage…
“I don’t think I can picture it.” You said, looking up at him.
“Wait a sec.” He grabbed his phone from the bed. “I’ll show you.”
A few taps later, he was scrolling through his band's instagram account, and after a moment, he turned the screen towards you.
“There.”
Your eyes widened.
“…Holy shit.”
It was him… standing under bright stage lights, dressed in all black, with the mask covering his face. You could tell it was him because of the tattoos, and the black tank top. But he didn’t look like your Noah...
You looked at the photo, then back at the man kneeling comfortably on the bedroom floor in a faded old t-shirt, carefully folding up his underwear to pack in his suitcase.
“I can’t believe that’s you.”
He smiled.
“I’ve changed a bit.”
“A bit?” You looked at the photo again. “This is just crazy.”
Noah chuckled, then you handed the mask back over to him.
“So…” You said, drawing out the word as a smirk spread across your face. Noah immediately recognised that look, and he rasied an eyebrow.
“What?”
You tried your hardest to keep a straight face.
“Have you ever worn it in the bedroom?”
He looked a bit taken back.
“Excuse me?”
“The mask...”
He laughed, shaking his head, almost looking a little shy.
“…No.”
“No?” You looked back down at it in his hands with disappointment. “…Wow. What a waste.”
“A waste?” He laughed, “Baby, I spent years wearing that thing on stage.”
“And apparently nowhere else.”
He shook his head, still chuckling. Then you glanced up through your lashes.
“But would you…?”
He paused.
“…Would I what?”
“Wear it in the bedroom?”
His eyebrows lifted, and for a moment he was quiet. Then he leaned back on one hand, a smile slowly spreading across his face.
“Maybe…” He nodded, “It just depends.”
“On what?”
His smile turned teasing.
“…Who’s asking.”
Heat rushed straight to your cheeks.
“You know who’s asking.”
“No I don’t.” He teased.
“There’s only one other person in this room.”
“Hm.” He pretended to think about it. “You want me to wear this in bed?”
A smirk spread across your face.
“...Maybe.”
He held your gaze for a moment before his expression softened.
“Huh. Good to know.” He nodded casually, before turning back to packing. Then he added, “You’ve become awfully confident this week.”
“Have I?”
“Mhm.” He smiled, “The woman who used to refuse to spend my money went shopping with my credit card this morning, and now-”
“Do you wanna know what I bought?” You grinned, interrupting him, and his face softened again.
“I thought it was a surprise?”
You shrugged.
“I’m awful at surprises,” you said as you sat on the edge of his bed, reaching for your bag. “Here.”
You handed the black plastic bag over to him, and he curiously took a peek inside.
“Oh, baby… what do we have here?”
Noah reached into the bag and pulled out the box. When he saw the picture on the box, and realised there was a wand vibrator inside, his eyebrows rose slightly and a warm, delighted smile spread across his face.
“Wow…” he said softly, turning the box over in his hands. “You really went out and bought this?”
You nodded, cheeks warming under his gaze.
“I remembered you said that toys were something you’d like to try with me,” you said quietly. “So… I thought we could take this to the hotel tonight.”
Noah’s expression softened even more. He set the box aside and gently pulled you down into his lap, wrapping his arms around you.
“You went into a sex shop by yourself,” he smirked, sounding both impressed and incredibly fond. “My sweet girl did that for me?”
He kissed your forehead, and you couldn't help but giggle.
“We’re gonna have so much fun with this tonight, princess,” he said softly, a gentle smile playing on his lips. “I can already picture how pretty you’re going to look when I use it on you.”
You smiled, feeling heat rush between your thighs- then suddenly, you pushed yourself up off of him.
“I guess I better start packing then.” You smiled, and Noah nodded.
“I don’t know how much you plan on taking,” Noah began, “But there’s still plenty of room in my bag.” He nodded towards the suitcase on the bed.
“Thanks,” you said, looking down at him, then your smile became a little sheepish. “…Would you help me?”
Noah looked up at you.
“Help you pack?”
You nodded.
“If… that’s okay.”
“Of course it is.” He said soflty.
You rubbed your hands together nervously.
“Thanks. I know it probably sounds silly...”
“It doesn’t.” He shook his head, suddenly sensing the shift in your mood and body language, “Talk to me, baby. I can tell something’s bothering you.”
You let out a small sigh before sitting back down beside him on the edge of the bed.
“I always get stressed packing, it doesn’t matter if I’m going somewhere for one night or one month, I always get so overwhelmed.” You admitted. “I worry I’ve forgotten something important… then I pack extras just in case… then I convince myself I’ve packed too much…” You laughed quietly at yourself. “Then I end up unpacking everything and starting again.”
“How many times?” He asked.
“…Usually three or four.”
He smiled sympathetically.
“I wondered why it took you so long to pack for Paris.”
“You noticed?”
“I notice everything.”
Your cheeks warmed.
“I just…” You looked down at your hands, feeling slightly nervous. “I thought…”
He waited patiently.
“I thought maybe…” You smiled shyly. “Since we’re doing this now…”
His eyebrows lifted slightly.
“Could this be something you take care of for me?”
The smile that spread across his face was ever so gentle.
“Sweetheart.” He reached over, taking one of your hands in both of his. “Of course. I’d love to.”
You felt yourself relax before he’d even done anything.
“You would?”
“Mhm.” He gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. “Thank you for telling me how it makes you feel.”
Your shoulders seemed to drop all by themselves, feeling the anxiety slowly melting away.
“Here’s what’s going to happen.” He said, his voice calm but still certain. Making you feel like he knows what he’s doing, everything's under control. “I’m going to ask you a few questions.”
You nodded.
“What are we doing tonight?”
“We’re going to a concert.”
“And tomorrow?”
“I think we’re coming home?”
“Yes,” he nodded with a little smile, “So that means one night away.”
You nodded again.
“That means we don’t need to prepare for every possible situation, do we, baby?”
You laughed, watching him rise to his feet.
“…I do tend to do that.” You confessed.
“I guessed.” He smirked, leading you into the guest room, where you kept everything you salvaged from your apartment. He reached for your suitcase from the closet- one that he bought you in Paris because the one you brought was overfilled- and he lied it down open on the bed.
“I’ll tell you what to pack. If you think of anything else, then tell me. If you panic or can’t decide whether you need something or not, I’ll make the choice for you.” He smiled, “Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, chuckling quietly, “You make it sound so simple.”
“That’s because it is.” He smiled. “And once I’ve zipped this suitcase up,” he looked into your eyes. “…We’re done. No checking or unpacking. If you suddenly think of something when we’re in the car, then we can stop off somewhere and buy it.”
“…Really?”
He nodded, reaching for your hand.
“I promise you, sweetheart.” His thumb brushed gently across your knuckles. “One forgotten toothbrush has never ruined a weekend.”
He then dropped your hand and gently tapped the suitcase.
“So it seems my first official job as your dom,” he looked at you with a playful smile, “Is packing this bag. And your first job as my submissive is to trust me when I say we’ve got everything we need.”
For a moment, you simply looked at him. Then you nodded your head.
“Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.” You smiled.
He leaned over and kissed your forehead.
“Good girl.”
Those words made your heart feel warm, and Noah smiled to himself before setting his hands on his hips.
“Right then, let’s start packing.” He pointed towards the wardrobe, “Concert outfit first.”
You turned towards the wardrobe, searching through your clothes.
“I don’t really know what to wear.”
“That’s okay.” He walked over beside you, “What are your options?”
You reached for a couple of hangers.
“I was thinking maybe this?” You held up a black dress. “But then I thought maybe jeans with a nice top would be better… remember that top you bought me in Paris? The leather one that laces up in the front?”
You were already reaching for the top.
“But maybe it’s too much…”
“Sweetheart.”
You stopped talking, and he gave you a gentle smile.
“Remember your job.”
“…Trust you.” You nodded.
“Good.” He looked at the clothes in your hands before taking the black top from you. “I think you should wear this.”
“Yeah?”
He nodded his head.
“This and those jeans you like, the comfy ones. I think that’d be pretty.”
You smiled to yourself.
“Yeah? I was thinking about that, but I don’t know if it’d be appropriate, I don’t know what kinda concert-”
“Trust me, baby. It’ll be perfect.”
You nodded your head, and he neatly started to pack them.
“There… now, pyjamas.”
You nodded and reached for a comfy oversized tshirt, and a pair of shorts.
“And underwear!” You noted, before opening the drawers while Noah politely turned his attention to the suitcase instead.
“How many?” You called over your shoulder.
“How many nights are we staying?”
“One.”
“So?”
“…Two pairs?” You asked.
He smiled.
“Perfect.”
You grabbed two before pausing.
“…Or maybe three.”
He looked over.
“Why three?”
“Just in case.”
“What emergency requires a third pair of underwear?”
“You never know what might happen, Noah!” You chuckled, reaching for a third pair, then a couple pairs of socks, then handed it all over to him to pack.
He folded everything with such care, then looked up at you again.
“Toiletries next. Toothbrush, hairbrush, perfume, deodorant… what else? Skincare?”
You collected all those things, putting them into a wash bag before handing them over.
“Hair tools? Make-up?” He asked.
You looked at your overflowing make-up bag.
“…Do I need all of this?”
He peered inside.
“I’m not qualified to answer that.”
“I’ll bring it all, just in case.” You chuckled.
When the toiletries were packed, he zipped the little wash bag shut before placing it neatly beside your clothes, then he looked around the room.
“Anything else?”
You instinctively began scanning every shelf, every drawer, every possible thing you might have forgotten. Then your brain started doing exactly what it always did.
What about…? Did I…? Should I…?
Noah noticed your eyes darting around, and his brows furrowed.
“Hey.” Your attention returned to him. “What are you doing?”
“…Just checking.”
“For?”
“I don’t know.” You let out a tiny laugh, before quietly confessing, “My brain’s doing the thing...”
“I can tell.” He stepped closer until he was standing in front of you. “Look at me.”
You did.
“You’ve got your outfit, your toiletries. You’ve got your phone.”
“Mhm.”
“I’ve got chargers in my bag.”
“…Okay.”
Your shoulders relaxed.
“We’re staying one night. And if we somehow discover we’ve forgotten something… then we’ll just buy it.” Then, without another word, he reached down, and zipped the suitcase closed. “There.”
You stared at it.
It was done. Normally, this was the moment you’d immediately unzip it again. Check every pocket, count your socks. Wonder if you needed another hoodie. Instead, you looked at Noah.
“That’s it?” You asked.
He smiled.
“Yep.”
You took a slow breath in.
“…Okay.” A smile of pure relief spread across your face. “I’ve never packed for a trip without feeling stressed before.”
Noah walked over, cupped your face in both hands and kissed your forehead.
“That’s because this time, you didn’t have to do it by yourself.”
…
The drive passed far quicker than either of you expected it to, though neither of you complained. You stopped asking where he was taking you two hours in, and just decided to relax. He let you play your music as he drove, one hand on the steering wheel while the other reached over to rest on your thigh.
Every now and then you’d pass a sign, and you’d immediately start trying to guess the destination in your mind again… trying to figure out what concert was being held nearby…
But before you knew it, a couple of hours later, Noah pulled into the underground car park of a beautiful hotel in the middle of the city. He parked up, then got out to open the passenger door.
You climbed out and offered to take your suitcase from him, but he shook his head, insisting on taking the bags up to the entrance.
And wow… it wasn’t as fancy as Paris, but it was still so elegant.
“This is…” You couldn’t put it into words.
“Nice?”
“A little bit nicer than nice.” You chuckled.
“I hoped you’d like it.” He grinned, "I've stayed here a couple times before."
Inside, the lobby was beautiful. There were marble floors that reflected the warm light from big chandeliers overhead, fresh flowers decorated almost every table, and the entire place smelled like fresh linen and a touch of something floral... probably from the flowers.
The receptionist greeted you both warmly as you checked in, before handing Noah the room key. Then, as you stepped into the elevator, you found yourself leaning lightly against his shoulder.
“Tired?”
“A little. I think it’s from the drive.”
“Being a passenger princess is hard work,” Noah teased, “We’ve got plenty of time before we leave tonight if you want a nap.”
“I might.” You said, then he kissed the top of your head.
"C'mon then."
The room was even more beautiful than the lobby. The big windows overlooked the city, and a king sized bed sat in the centre of the room, with the most comfy looking white bedding.
There was a little seating area by the window with a small table, on which sat some fresh flowers. Beside the seats was the door to the balcony.
“…This is amazing!”
Noah set both suitcases down at the bottom of the bed.
“It’s alright.”
“‘Alright?’” Your eyebrows raised in disbelief.
He shrugged innocently.
“I’ve stayed in worse.” He smirked.
You laughed.
“You’re so spoiled, Noah.”
“Hey, I tour for a living.” He chuckled, before straightening up, “Still wanna have a nap, baby?”
You thought for a moment, before shaking your head.
“I think I’m okay. I know it’s still pretty early… but I’m so excited, I just want to get ready now.”
He smiled.
“That’s okay,” he nodded towards the bathroom. “Want to shower first?”
You looked towards the enormous bathroom before looking back at him, a little smirk on your lips.
“…Together?”
His lips curved into a soft smile.
“If you’d like.”
“Oh, I’d like.” You grinned.
…
You spent most of the shower simply talking, laughing, washing each other with gentle hands.
There wasn’t anything sexual about it, not even when he ran his soapy hands over your breasts and down to your ass. You melted into his touch, and he did the same when your fingers worked the shampoo into his hair.
Noah stepped out first, wrapping a towel around his hips before handing one to you. After you stepped out, you stayed in the bathroom for a few more minutes. Noah took another soft towel and gently started to dry your hair, then you took it from him, and made him bend down as you ruffled the towel against his hair, making it fall all over the place.
Afterwards, Noah disappeared back into the bedroom, tugging a clean black tshirt over his head while you reached into the closet for the fluffy white robe. You decided it wouldn’t make sense to get dressed yet, since there were still a few hours before you had to leave.
So instead, you dug through your suitcase for your makeup bag and hair dryer, since you always preferred your own. Then, all of a sudden you heard the sound of a phone buzzing. You instinctively looked over to check if it was yours, but it wasn’t. It was Noah’s.
“Huh.” He said as he looked at the screen.
“What?”
“I just need to take this.”
“Everything okay?”
“Mhm.” He hummed, answering it before opening the balcony door. “Hey...”
The door slid shut behind him, muting most of the conversation. You tried not to listen in, you tried to concentrate on your makeup… but you could still make out some of what was being said.
“…Yeah…”
It’s not like you were trying to listen.
“…Tell Oli I said thanks for sorting me out tonight.”
Your hand froze halfway to your eyelashes.
Oli?
There couldn’t be that many Olis Noah knew. So you tried to ignore it.
“…It’s not even really for me…”
Your curiosity won, and you looked towards the balcony door.
“No… it’s for someone special.”
Your heart skipped a beat, your tummy fluttering at his words. Someone special? You? A hundred different possibilities raced through your head, Oli, concert, someone special…
You slowly lowered the mascara wand onto the dressing table. There was only one Oli you could think of- and only one concert you had mentioned to Noah… and it suddenly started to make sense.
He was taking you to see them now, because he’d be away on tour when Bring Me were playing in your city. Your heart sank a little at the thought of Noah having to leave in a couple weeks- but you couldn’t linger on it too long, as he continued talking outside.
“…Yeah, she still has no idea.”
A grin spread across your face before you could stop it. He was definitely talking about you.
“…I owe you one, man.” He paused, then let out a laugh, “Yeah… okay, I’ll see you in a bit.”
The call ended, and your eyes widened. See you… in a bit?
Your brain immediately started putting pieces together, and your stomach fluttered.
There was absolutely no way…
You hurriedly picked your mascara back up, trying to look as though you’d never stopped getting ready, and a second later, the balcony door slid open. Noah stepped back inside, slipping his phone into his pocket.
“Everything alright?” he asked casually.
You looked at him through the mirror.
“Mhm.”
“You sure?”
“Yep.” You popped the p.
He narrowed his eyes ever so slightly.
“…You’re smiling.”
“I’m always smiling!”
He folded his arms, a suspicious smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“…How much of that did you hear?”
You widened your eyes innocently.
“Nothing!”
“Uh huh.” He nodded his head slowly, like he didn’t believe you.
“I was doing my makeup.”
“Were you now?”
“I was.”
He took a slow step closer.
“So you definitely didn’t hear any of that?”
“Well, I might’ve heard… a name.”
“And?”
“And…” You smiled sweetly. “…I still have no idea where we’re going.”
That wasn’t entirely true anymore, you weren’t completely certain, but you had a feeling that Noah’s surprise was about to rock your world. (*get it? bmth reference? heh)
…
“You ready?” Noah glanced over as you slid your rings onto your fingers.
You looked at yourself in the mirror one last time.
Your black jeans fit you perfectly, your chunky boots peeking out just enough at the bottom. The leather lace up top you’d picked with Noah earlier sat perfectly, showing just enough skin to make you feel confident and sexy without feeling too exposed. Necklaces were layered around your neck, rings decorated almost every finger, and your hair fell exactly how you’d hoped after spending nearly an hour styling it.
You actually felt cool, and very pretty.
Noah looked stupidly hot as always. In all black, as always. He wore his black jeans with the cut outs, that made you bite your lip wherever he turned around and wonder what’s he doing with all that ass? He wore his black boots too, with his fitted black tshirt beneath a lightweight jacket.
Then, as you stepped towards the door, he reached for his favourite sunglasses, putting them on despite the evening sun beginning to set, followed by a black baseball cap that hid most of his hair.
Once he was ready, he reached over, taking your hand.
“C’mon. The cabs waiting for us.”
It was only a short drive to the venue from the hotel. You were going to argue, and tell Noah you could’ve just walked… but you weren’t sure just how easily recognisable he’d be to the fans if you were going to see a band he has toured with in the past.
So instead, you sat tucked against his side in the back seat while city passed by the window. And when you looked outside, you noticed the streets were getting busier. There were groups of people dressed in black band shirts, all walking in the same direction.
Your heart began beating a little faster, and when you looked back at Noah, you could tell he was trying very hard not to smile.
The taxi finally stopped outside a huge arena, and you climbed out first, completely astounded by just how many people were lined up outside. Instead of joining the enormous queue, though, Noah gently placed a hand on the small of your back, and kept his head down as he led you away.
“This way.”
You frowned.
“But the entrance is over there.” You pointed.
“Not ours.”
“What do you mean?”
He simply smiled.
“C’mon. You'll see.”
He led you around the side of the building, where there were no crowds, and it seemed strangely quiet. A large metal security gate stood ahead, and before you even reached it, one of the security guards smiled.
“Hey, Noah! Wasn’t expecting to see you tonight.”
“Hey, man.” Noah nodded, taking his sunglasses off.
The guard unclipped the barrier to let you through.
“Good to see you again.”
“You too.”
He knew the security? Shit, were you still underestimating this guy?
You followed Noah through the gate, trying not to look completely bewildered, but then another member of staff approached almost immediately.
“Oh, yhere you are.” She smiled. “Thought you’d be here a little earlier.”
“We got a little held up.” Noah explained.
“No worries.” The staff member looked towards you and smiled. “You must be Noah’s plus one.”
Your eyebrows lifted.
“…Uh…”
Before you could answer, Noah smiled and nodded his head.
“She is.”
“Nice to meet you.”
“You too.”
She handed Noah two laminated passes attached to black lanyards. He slipped one over his own head before turning towards you.
“Head down for me.”
You obeyed, and he carefully lifted your hair out of the way before placing the pass around your neck. His fingers brushed lightly against the back of your neck as he adjusted it, making you shiver.
“There.”
You looked down, and were met with the bold letters reading, ALL ACCESS and your eyes widened.
“Noah?”
He just smiled.
“What?”
“I…” You looked back at the pass. “…All access?”
“Yep.”
Your heart started racing again, but he took your hand, and started to lead you as if he knew this place like the back of his hand.
“This way.”
The two of you walked through another set of doors, then another. The corridors felt endless, people hurried past carrying guitars, lighting equipment and flight cases. Someone walked by wearing a headset, speaking into a radio, and another person nodded at Noah as they passed.
“Hey, man.”
“Hey.”
It felt busy, but rather organised. You even found yourself moving a little closer to Noah as everything rushed around you.
“Nervous?” He asked softly, his hand coming around to rest on your hip.
“A little.”
He smiled reassuringly.
“I’ve got you.”
You nodded.
“I know.”
He gave your hip a gentle squeeze.
“I’m just wondering… I was gonna go find some of the guys, just to say hi, see how things are going. You can come with me if you want, I don’t mind at all, or if you’d rather we just go find our seats-“
You opened your mouth, then closed it again. Not knowing how to say it without sounding ungrateful.
“Can I be honest?”
He smiled immediately.
“I’d rather you always were.”
You laughed quietly, looking down at the floor.
“I'm just starting to feel a little anxious.”
His expression softened.
“Too many people?”
“A little. It’s just a lot… and,” You rubbed your thumb against your lanyard. “I don’t want to make a fool of myself.”
“You don’t know that! I’ve never met people like this before!”
He raised an eyebrow.
“People like what?” He asked.
“You know…” You waved your hands, trying to find the right word. “Rockstars?”
His eyebrows lifted.
“…Baby.” He chuckled, shaking his head.
“What?”
“You live with one.”
You couldn’t help but laugh.
“You’re different.” You smirked.
“Am I?”
“Yes.”
“How?”
You thought about it for a second.
“I forget you’re famous.” You said, and he smiled to himself. “I just see… Noah.”
For a moment, he looked strangely touched by that. Then you sighed.
“And besides, I know Motionless are opening tonight.”
“Yeah?”
“I’ve always had a tiny crush on Ricky.” You confessed with another gentle sigh.
Noah slowly turned his head towards you, staying completely silent for a moment before asking,
“Ricky?”
You nodded innocently.
“The guitar player?” He asked.
“That’s the one.”
He stared at you for another second before letting out the most dramatic sigh imaginable.
“I bring you backstage, I organise this big surprise…” He placed a hand over his heart. “…And you’re thinking about another man?!”
“I’m not thinking about another man! I said I used to have a little crush.”
“Oh.” He nodded gravely. “That’s much better.”
“It was years ago! I haven’t even listened to them since… pfft, 2018?”
He looked unconvinced.
“I don’t know…”
You nudged his arm.
“Oh, c’mon, don’t be so dramatic.”
“I’m devastated, baby." He frowned dramatically, pulling you in closer to him until you were chest to chest.
The teasing eased the heaviness that had settled on your chest, and you felt yourself breathe a little easier- which Noah clearly noticed.
“Better?”
“Yeah.” You nodded, a smile tugging at your lips.
“Good.” He nodded down the corridor. “C’mon, let’s go find our seats.”
You took a couple of steps before stopping.
“Actually...”
He turned back.
“What?”
“If you want to go and say hi to everyone… I don’t want you feeling like you can’t just because of me.”
“I wouldn’t.” He insisted
“I know.” You smiled. “But you’ve got friends here. People you probably haven’t seen in months or years.”
He looked at you carefully.
“Then what would you do?” He asked.
“I could just…” You shrugged. “…Wait in the seats?”
His eyebrows drew together.
“By yourself?”
“I don’t mind.”
“You sure?”
You nodded.
“I don’t know anyone here, not personally.” You laughed quietly. “And I'd feel a bit awkward just… standing beside you while everyone catches up. I’d feel like I’m in the way.”
He was quiet for a moment, then he stepped closer, frowning.
“You’d never be in the way, baby. They’d all be happy to meet you.”
“I know.” You shook your head.
“But?” He raised an eyebrow, and you let out a long sigh.
“I think I’d be more comfortable if you just… got to be Noah for a little bit without me. Go be a guy with the rest of the guys!”
He looked at you with a softness that almost made your heart ache.
“I appreciate you thinking about that.” He tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “But I’m not leaving you on your own”
His thumb brushed gently across your cheek, and you shook your head.
”You’re not.” You said, “You don’t have to babysit me.”
“I’m not.”
“Then what are you doing?”
He smiled, then nodded as if to say okay…
“I’m taking my girl to her seat,” His hand found yours again. “Then, if you’re happy and settled with a drink and some snacks…” A playful smile tugged at his lips. “Then I’ll disappear for ten minutes, say hello to everyone, and come straight back.”
“…Ten minutes?” You smirked.
“I promise.”
“You won’t get caught talking?”
“I probably will, but I’ll tell them someone’s waiting for me.”
Your stomach fluttered.
“Someone special?” You teased, remembering what you had heard over the phone. And he smiled without a hint of teasing this time.
“Exactly.” He kissed your forehead, “And if I see Ricky back there, I’m telling him-”
“No, Noah!” You laughed. “You’re not telling him anything!”
“What? He deserves to know that he missed his chance.” Noah grinned.
“Oh my god...” You shook your head.
He grinned, clearly pleased with himself now. Then you let him lace his fingers through yours, and he led you further down another corridor then up some stairs, then down another corridor. You had no idea where you were being taken to, but eventually, you ran into another member of staff, who smiled the moment he recognised Noah.
“Evening, Noah.”
“Hey.”
The staff member scanned both of your passes before pushing the door open.
“Enjoy the show, man.”
“Thanks.”
You stepped through the door first, and immediately gasped.
“Wow…”
The room was beautiful. It wasn’t enormous, but there was plenty of space. In the middle of the room was a leather couch, and behind it was a table already laid out with drinks and bowls of snacks. Then you stepped over to the balcony, where there were seats that overlooked the stage.
“Is this just for us?” You asked, and Noah nodded his head, a smile tugging at his lips as he took in how amazed you were at something that felt so simple to him.
You held onto the railing as you looked over the balcony.
“No way...”
Thousands of people were slowly filling the arena below, and you couldn’t believe how close the stage was.
“Noah,” You turned to him, your eyes wide. “This is incredible.”
“I thought you’d like it.” He said simply.
“I thought we were gonna be somewhere at the back.”
He laughed.
“Not a chance… it's better here. Better view, better seats, more privacy.”
You didn't know quite how to express your gratitude, besides a simple,
“Thank you.”
He shrugged almost bashfully.
“I wanted tonight to be special.”
“It already is…” You smiled softly... then you suddenly reached for your bag. “Oh! I should get a picture for Tom!” You grinned as you pulled your phone out of your bag.
“Want me to get one of you?” He asked, and for a moment you thought about it… then you shook your head.
“No.” You grinned, “You need to be in it too.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“Me?”
You nodded your head.
“Besides the dirty ones on your phone, I don't think we have any pictures together.”
He chuckled.
“Fair point.”
He wandered over, and crouched down a little as he stood beside you.
“Ready?”
“Yep.”
You lifted your phone again, stretching your arm out.
“Smile.”
“I am smiling.”
“You don’t look like it. Smile harder.”
He rolled his eyes dramatically before softening into a genuine smile.
“There… perfect!”
You grinned at the screen, taking a couple pictures, and just as you went to press the button a third time, you felt soft lips press against your cheek.
You put your phone back downa nd instantly tapped on the photo, and felt your cheeks start to burn. It looked quite romantic, his lips on your skin, your smile, his eyes closed, the lights from the arena behind you.
“Send those to me.” He said as he straightened up and gently tapped your hip. “We look cute.”
You stared at it for another second.
“Yeah…” You smiled to yourself. “We do.”
You quickly sent the picture to Noah, deciding you won’t tell Tom until after it’s over. So you slipped your phone into your bag, and when you looked back up, Noah was already watching you with that soft look on his face.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“Hmm…” You narrowed your eyes, unconvinced.
But he just smiled.
“I was just wondering if you’re still okay with me disappearing for a few minutes.”
You looked around your little private box again- at the sofa, the drinks and snacks, the stage… and you smiled.
“Yeah, of course.”
“You sure?”
You nodded your head, and he gently pulled you closer.
“If at any point you want me back, just text me.”
“I will.” You smiled.
“And if Ricky somehow finds his way up here, tell him to back off.”
You burst out laughing.
“Oh my god, Noah.”
“I need to cover all possibilities, baby.” He smirked, then leaned down and kissed your forehead, his arms wrapping around you. “I won’t be long.”
“I know.”
He gave you one last squeeze before stepping back.
“I’ll make sure I’m back before the lights go down.”
“That’s okay.”
He gave you one last smile, then he turned and disappeared through the door. Then after it clicked shut behind him, you were left alone in a private box in a huge arena…
You slowly turned back towards the stage, just trying to take it all in. The crowd was growing by the minute, the seats were starting to fill out, and the sound of chattering filled the silence Noah left behind.
You smiled to yourself.
This was your life now.
A month ago, you were worrying your landlord was going to kick you out because you were behind on rent, you’d been counting tips at the end of every shift, wondering if you’d have enough left over after bills to treat yourself to takeout. And now, you were standing in a private suite at a sold out arena, with an all access pass, all because… you weren’t really sure. Was it because he liked the way you made his coffee, was it because he felt sorry for you… or was it deeper than that?
You shook your head, trying to shake the thought away, knowing Noah wouldn’t want you to think that. So instead, you put your bag down on the couch and picked up a water bottle, and waited for Noah to come back.
…
The first opener was amazing, you had never heard of them before, but you were blown away. God, you’d forgotten how much you loved the feeling of being at a show.
You found yourself nodding along, not knowing any of the words, your drink forgotten on the little table beside you as Noah silently watched you more than he watched the performance.
“You like them?”
“Yeah, they’re so good!”
“I thought you would.”
Between the songs he’d tell you little things about the bands, “They’re from Australia”, “They’ve been touring nonstop”, “I wrote with their guitarist a couple of years ago”, “I’m in a group chat with the vocalist…”
You’d look at him in awe every single time.
“You just know everyone.”
He laughed.
“It’s a small world.”
Noah teased you relentlessly while Motionless were on the stage, every time Ricky did something he’d make a comment, “Hey, did you just see what your boyfriend did?”, “Isn’t your boyfriend such a great singer?”, “Fuck, I wish I was as talented as your boyfriend.”
You rolled your eyes, nudging him with your elbow, or groaning dramatically. But he loved seeing you react, he couldn’t help but laugh.
Then eventually, the giant backdrop changed, and it’s like the stage grew bigger. Crew members walked out with more equipment and started putting things into places. You leaned over the balcony railing, watching it all happen.
Then, after a little while, the lights all went out again. The suspense made you giddy as you squeezed Noah’s hand.
“Oh my god!!” You yelped, then music began playing, and after another moment… “There they are!”
Noah looked over at you just in time to see the biggest grin spread across your face.
“Happy?”
“So happy!” You beamed.
The entire show was just unbelievable, you didn’t have a better word for it. The lights and the visuals, the crowd singing along to every word. Even from your private balcony, you could feel the energy radiating off the audience below.
You were even dancing and singing along, which made Noah smirk.
“I didn’t know you knew all the words.”
“I know enough.” You laughed.
Then, a few songs later you found yourself leaning on the railing, watching the mosh pit.
“You know, I actually saw them once before.” You said as you sat back in your seat.
“Oh yeah?”
“Mhm, a few years ago.” You said, then hesitated before adding, “With my ex.”
Noah’s expression stayed calm.
“How was it?”
You snorted.
“Well, it was going really well…” He already knew from your tone that there was a story coming. “…Until he decided jumping into the mosh pit was a brilliant idea. He got into a fight, and came back with a bloody nose because apparently somebody shoved him.”
Noah stared at you for a moment before shaking his head.
“…Fucking idiot.”
You burst out laughing.
“I know! That’s what I said.”
Noah just shook his head.
“You go to a concert where everyone’s pushing each other… then gets angry because someone pushed him?”
“That’s just the kind of person he was.” You sighed. “I remember spending most of the night worrying about him.”
Noah looked at you for a second, then he gently brushed his fingers against yours.
“I’m glad tonight’s different.”
“So am I.” You smiled.
Another song came to an end, and you caught Noah glancing towards the side of the stage, then checking the time on his phone.
“…Hey.”
“Hm?” You looked up.
“I’ve just got to disappear for a minute.”
You frowned.
“Now?”
“I’ll be right back.” He smiled reassuringly. “I promise.”
You looked at him curiously.
“…Is everything okay?” You asked.
He just nodded your head and pressed a kiss to your temple.
“Yeah. Enjoy this one.”
Then without another word, he left again. You frowned when the door shut behind him. That was weird…
Your mind immediately betrayed you. Was it because I mentioned my ex? Did I upset him? You shook your head. Don’t be ridiculous.
Still, you couldn’t help but glance towards the door every few moments. He’s taking his time, you thought. Another song finished and he still hadn’t returned.
It’s probably nothing. He might’ve just got stopped by a fan, if anyone recognised him. But your attention was brought back to the stage again when Oli stepped up to the microphone.
“Alright…” The crowd quietened. “We’ve got a little surprise tonight.”
The crowd wooo’d so loud before he even finished his sentence, and you grinned, wondering what it could be.
Then your face dropped as a figure dressed entirely in black stepped out.
Your heart stopped, and the crowd screamed so loudly, but you couldn’t hear a thing.
Because Noah just walked out on to the stage with a microphone in his hand.
You stumbled as you rose to your feet to get a better view. Oli walked over with a huge grin, throwing an arm around Noah’s shoulders before saying something into the microphone that was lost beneath twenty thousand people screaming.
He hadn’t left because he was upset. He hadn’t left because of your ex. He’d left because he was about to walk onto one of the biggest stages in the country, and didn’t even think to let you know?!
You couldn’t stop smiling. He looked so fucking good out there, and he completely blew you away with his singing and screaming… he was really good.
You didn’t feel like you were in your own body while he was performing, it all felt like a dream, until the door to the suite opened a couple of minutes later.
Noah stepped inside, slightly out of breath, a little flushed from the performance, his hair messier than before. He barely had time to smile.
“Hey, baby-”
You rushed across the room in three quick steps, and your hands caught either side of his face. Then you kissed him, hard. Full of adrenaline and excitement- you could still hear the crowd as he laughed softly into the kiss, one arm wrapping around your waist to steady you.
When you finally pulled back, you were almost breathless.
“That.” You pointed a finger at him. “…Was the hottest thing I have ever seen in my life.”
His eyebrows lifted.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t act humble, Noah.” You narrowed your eyes on him, “You walked out in front of thousands of people… and you looked like…” You searched for the words before simply giving up. “…You looked like a rock star!”
He couldn’t help but smirk.
“I am one.”
“Oh, shut up.” You shook your head, making him laugh. “Here I was thinking you left because I upset you-”
His expression softened immediately, and interrupted you.
“What?”
You paused for a moment, chewing on your lip.
“When you left, I thought maybe it was because I mentioned my ex… I thought I annoyed you.”
His face fell.
“Oh, sweetheart.” His hands found yours. “Not even for a second.”
“I know that now.”
…
There were only a few songs left, and somehow each one felt better than the last. And now, every time Oli wandered near the side of the stage, you’d grin to yourself.
“You were just down there…” You whispered to Noah halfway through another song.
“I know.”
“It’s still so crazy to me.”
“You’ll get used to it.” Noah smiled, patting your thigh. But you didn’t think you ever would.
When the final song ended, confetti cannons exploded over the crowd, and for one last time, the crowd went crazy. You found yourself clapping until your hands hurt, and as the lights slowly came back up, you turned to Noah.
“This might’ve actually been one of the best nights of my life.”
His smile softened as he stood up, offering his hand to you.
“I’m really glad.”
“Thank you.” You said after a moment, and he squeezed your fingers.
“I wanted to do something special… and after the week you’ve had, I hope it was worth it.”
“It really was.”
The two of you lingered there for another minute, watching as thousands of people slowly began filing towards the exits.
Your ears were ringing, and your heart was racing, yet you felt like you could run a marathon with the adrenaline that was coursing through you.
“So,” Noah smiled as he picked up his jacket. “You ready to head back to the hotel?”
You nodded your head.
“But I’m way too awake to go to bed anytime soon.”
He laughed.
“Yeah, I don’t think either of us are sleeping just yet.”
Still buzzing with adrenaline, you walked hand in hand, following him back through the quiet corridors, the echoes of the concert still ringing in your ears.
You left through the back, the same way you came in, and there was already a driver waiting to take you back to the hotel. And even in the back seat of the car, you were still buzzing, and you couldn’t stop talking.
“I still can’t believe you did that.”
Noah smiled to himself from beside you in the back of the cab.
“I know.”
“No, seriously.” You laughed. “I thought you were annoyed, then suddenly you’re on the stage!?”
He chuckled.
“Was I good though?”
You laughed, resting your head against the seat.
“Yes! And oh my god, you were so hot.”
He looked sideways at you over the top of his sunglasses that he slipped back on before leaving.
“Still thinking about that?”
“I can’t stop thinking about it.”
His smile widened.
“I don’t think you’ve ever kissed me like that before.”
“Can you blame me? I didn’t know you sounded like… that!”
He frowned playfully.
“…That?”
“You were screaming and growling! And doing those… those monster noises!”
He burst out laughing.
“‘Monster noises?’”
“You know what I mean!”
“Yeah, I do those.” He he chuckled.
“I had no idea!”
He couldn’t stop smiling now.
“Well, you’ve never asked.”
“I didn’t know there was anything to ask! I always thought you’d like to keep me and your work separate…”
His face softened.
“Why’d you think that?”
You shrugged, not really wanting to talk about that right now, after having such fun tonight. So you decided to change the subject.
“I was wondering, when you go on tour…”
“Yes?”
“Can I…” You hesitated. “…Can I come and see you at a show?”
“You just did.” He smirked.
“I know, but…” You smiled shyly. “I wanna see one of your own shows. I know I’ll be working most of the time, but if there’s ever one near enough-”
He reached across the seat and took your hand.
“Sweetheart.”
“Hm?”
“It’s already sorted.”
“…What?” You asked.
“You’re on the guest list, there’s a couple dates where you’re not working, so I sorted it out.”
“You already planned it?”
“I haven’t booked plane tickets or anything yet because I didn’t know if you’d want to come out and see me… but yeah.”
Your heart squeezed in your chest.
“So if you want to come” He squeezed your hand. “There’ll be tickets waiting for you.”
You stared at him.
“You really thought about all of that?”
“Of course I did.” He said like it was obvious, like there had never been another option. “I want you there.”
You smiled so hard your cheeks hurt.
“I’d love that.” You said, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
…
By the time you reached the hotel, neither of you had really come down from the adrenaline. You were still giggling in the elevator, replaying moments from the show, teasing Noah about how you’ve never heard so many women squeal the way they did when he appeared on the stage. He simply rolled his eyes, and teased you back just as much, making comments about Ricky again.
Them the elevator doors opened, and you wandered down the corridor towards your room. You waited just outside the door as Noah patted his pockets down for the key card, before holding it open for you.
And the moment the door shut behind you, you kicked your boots off with a groan.
“Why do my feet hurt so much if we were sitting for most of it?”
“Was it worth it, though?” Noah smirked.
“So worth it.”
Then you glanced down at yourself. Your leather top was sticking to your skin, the necklaces were starting to feel claustrophobic and you rubbed at your eye, completely forgetting about your makeup.
“I feel disgusting.” You groaned.
Noah chuckled as he tossed his cap onto the dresser.
“You’re still beautiful to me, baby.”
You side eyed him as if to say yeah right.
“I think I need a shower.”
“Then take a shower.”
You looked up.
“You’d be okay with that?”
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” He walked over, gently brushing a strand of hair away from your face. “Go, take your time, sweetheart.”
“You don’t mind waiting?”
“I’ve got nowhere else to be.” He smiled, kissing your forehead.
You smiled back at him.
“…Okay. And when I get out,” a little cheeky smirk spread across your face, “Do you think we can test out that new toy?”
Noah smirked, sitting back on the bed.
“Of course we can.” He spread his legs out slightly.
You nodded and reached for your little wash bag before disappearing into the bathroom, already looking forward to washing away the sweat and makeup from the evening.
As the door clicked shut behind you, Noah let out a quiet breath and smiled to himself. Tonight had gone exactly the way he’d hoped… but you didn’t know he had one last surprise in store.
You showered in peace, not rushing yourself as you washed off the sweat and makeup, until you finally felt clean.
You stepped out and reached for a towel, wrapping it around yourself before turning to the sink to do your skincare. You could picture Noah on the bed already, laying back in just a pair of grey sweats or black shorts, scrolling on his phone or switching through the channels on the TV.
You were smiling to yourself, thinking about how nice the evening had been, then you pushed open the bathroom door and stepped into the bedroom.
Then you immediately stopped in your tracks.
Holy shit.
In front of you, on the bed, Noah was lying there completely naked. Well, completely naked besides the black ski mask that was pulled over his face, leaving only his eyes and mouth visible.
His tattoos were on full display across his body, standing out against the white bedding. One arm was tucked casually behind his head, looking so relaxed and confident… while his other hand held the wand vibrator you had bought this morning. He was slowly dragging the rounded head of the toy along the length of his thick, hard cock that rested against his lower stomach.
Fuck, he looked so powerful, and almost a little intimidating…
The moment he noticed you in the doorway, his eyes met yours through the mask, and a slow, predatory smirk tugged at his mouth. You felt your breath catch, you couldn’t even think straight as heat flooded between your thighs.
At first, Noah didn't move. He just kept slowly dragging the vibrating head along his cock, and down to his balls, watching you with dark, hungry eyes.
“Hi, princess,” he said, his voice low and a little teasing. “Took you long enough.”
He gave his cock another slow stroke with the toy, letting you watch it drag over every inch of him. The way he was was touching himself so casually while wearing nothing but the mask made your stomach flutter, and you swallowed hard, trying so hard to stop your head from spinning.
Noah tilted his head a little, his eyes dragging over your body.
“Drop the towel, sweet girl,” he said softly, but there was no mistaking the command in his tone. “I want to see you.”
You stood there for a second, your heart racing, your brain turning to mush- and Noah’s smirk just grew.
“C’mon, don’t get shy on me now, baby. You bought this toy for me… so I could use it on you. Come here and get on the bed.”
He spread his legs a little wider, making the view even more obscene- his hard cock, the buzzing vibrator, the mask, the tattoos, all of it on full display as he waited for you.
“I’ve been thinking about this since you handed it to me earlier, I can’t believe you went out and got this without me even having to ask…” He said, before a low groan slipped his lips. “Now get on this bed and let me show you how I reward my good girl.”
Everyone came back to the forest pretending it was just another evening at the river; though Noah knew better, and by the time the house appeared through the trees, so did you.
tropes: childhood friends to lovers / boy next door, reckless summer nostalgia / summer romance, mutual pinning & idiots in love, breaking into abandoned-ish houses (lol), sex with feelings
part one | part three
warnings: (three parts - smut in part 3) - explicit language, mentions of underage drinking, mentions of ghosts / the paranormal, some smoochin'
note: Hi, lovelies. I am so sorry it took me so long to get this out. When I wrote part one, I had a complete outline and plan for what I wanted, but I had such a hard time writing it in a way that felt right. I literally rewrote this part four different times and was getting so tired of it because I just hated every draft- but as I’ve forced myself to finally finish the last few days I realized it’s because I felt like I had to still keep it in two parts. However, I didn’t want to rush this fic. It’s a very personal one, and only two parts didn’t do this justice, so there will now be a part three so there aren’t 11,000 words on one part lol. I am sorry that the awaited smut will indeed be coming in the next part and that you’ll need to wait a smidge longer. With that said, part three is drafted and just needs to be edited, so should be out by the end of the week and not almost two months later… :,)
By the time seven came, the ring from Noah’s Slurpee cup had dried into a faint circle on your nightstand. You heard the ringing of a bike bell coming from the driveway, and outside, the Crescent glowed warm with the evening light.
Noah stood at the edge of your driveway with one foot propped on the pedal of his bike, his head tilted down at his phone until he felt you looking, then lifting his eyes to your window.
His smile grew the moment you turned around, pretending you hadn’t been staring, and you grabbed your phone before you could think about it any further. By the time you reached the driveway he had placed his device back into his pocket and was leaning over his handlebars, acting like he had been waiting ages.
“It’s about time,” he sighed, rolling his shoulder back in faux exhaustion. “I was starting to think you were making me look stupid out here on purpose.”
“You did that to yourself when you rang your bike bell like a twelve-year-old.” You tossed him a look as you opened the garage with the keypad on the side panel.
Noah glanced down at the bell, then flicked it once with his thumb.
You stared at him. “Are you done?”
“No.” He grinned, dinging it again. You groaned but held a smile, missing the way his own turned softer at the sight of yours.
Your bike was where you had left it years ago, leaning against a pile of cardboard boxes and an old plastic basketball hoop that was covered in dirt and scratches. The tires were a little dusty, the rubber handles peeling. Noah watched as you tugged it free, the whir of the bike chain faint as you walked it beside you.
“When’s the last time you rode it?”
You glanced down at the bike, then back at him. “The bike, or a dude?”
Noah’s eyebrows lifted as he snickered smugly, watching you swing your leg over the seat. “I obviously meant the bike, but it’s interesting you needed that clarification princess.”
“You asked a vague question,” you replied, rolling your bike with the tips of your toes to the keypad, closing the garage. You then turned to him with a frown.
“I asked about the bike,” he said, eyes bright. “You’re the one who made it dirty.”
You opened your mouth, then closed it again when nothing decent came out. Noah’s smile only got bigger.
“Oh, don’t look so pleased,” you said, pushing off before your face could get any warmer.
His laugh followed as he rolled after you, leaving the rumble of the garage door behind.
For a little while, neither of you said much. Noah rode beside you at first, and every now and then, his front tire drifted slightly ahead of yours before he eased back without being asked. You always used to complain when he “left you behind”, even when he never really went far enough to lose you. He would never admit out loud that he always liked making you chase him, relishing in the small huff of annoyance you gave when you caught up, just to know he was the one who had actually secretly slowed so you felt like you won.
Though it was never much of a secret when you knew all along. So when he slowed, you thought about how some habits, even through the essence of time, did not know how to die.
At the end of the Crescent, where the sidewalk cracked around the roots of an old poplar, the road bent toward the newer houses.
Noah glanced over his shoulder once, then turned his handlebars toward a narrow opening between two back fences where the grass had been worn flat from years of kids cutting through. The path was easy to miss if you did not know it was there, hidden behind a leaning cedar and a rusted chain link gate.
You slowed, pressing your brakes. “We’re still taking this way?”
Noah stood on his pedals, already disappearing into the break between the fences. “You always did.”
As the houses disappeared behind you and the trees grew thicker, the forest held the smell of summer. The earth was sweet, heavy, from the leaves baking softly in the sun. Pine and sap, along with the waft of warm bark, swelled through a soft hymn of bugs dancing through blades of tall grass that brushed your tires. As you inhaled deeply through your nose, relishing in the smell of nostalgia, you couldn’t help but watch the way Noah rode ahead.
He was taller now, needing to duck beneath branches with half a second to spare; and although the first one missed him, the second waiting beyond it did not.
The branch hit Noah square in the face, causing him to bark out a sound, his bike jolting over the uneven trail. He looked back at you once more before his front tire bumped over a root.
“You good?” you called, already laughing.
“I’m fine. That thing barely got me,” he shouted, running the back of his inked hand over his forehead.
“I dunno, looks like you lost to a tree,” you yelled back, swatting a few mosquitoes out of your face.
You stuck out your hand, letting the bushes skitter across your fingertips, the various shades of green fluttering over the skin as you passed. The trail ahead widened near the end of the bend, and Noah’s old brakes squeaked sharply as he eased just enough for you to catch up.
He glanced over at you then, noticing the quiet that emanated around you, his mouth already pulling around a comment. But whatever he had been about to say fell from his face when the front tire of his bike caught on a rock beneath the dirt.
“Jesus, Noah,” you laughed, watching him jerk the handlebars straight and hold himself with one foot, shoe dragging through the earth. “Maybe if you stopped staring at me, you’d actually ride straight.”
He blew a strand of hair out of his face, his smile flashing before he turned forward again. “Maybe if you stopped being distracting, I’d have a chance.”
It was hard to hide the flush that climbed onto your cheeks and ears, so you looked away before he could read into it. For a while, you focused on the path instead of him, noting the way the grass grew thicker and the bird song grew louder.
As the ground gradually sloped downward, you recognized the narrowing trail where the dirt became softer, the air cooling a few degrees as the trees opened wider ahead. The echo of the river grew louder before revealing itself at the end of the path, your chest tightening around the memory of it.
You caught glimpses of the shallows first, then the moss-dark stones and the fallen log still resting near the bend. For one second, you expected the water to welcome you back, falling back into step, not only through memory.
Though when Noah stopped and leaned his bike against the same tree he always had, you couldn’t help but realize how shallow the river had seemingly become.
“Why does it look so much… smaller, now?”
Noah followed your gaze to the water. For once, he did not answer right away.
The river moved over the stones in that same rush, but it no longer seemed wide enough to swallow you. To the left, the round pocket you had built as kids still sat cupped inside its crooked ring of rocks, somehow intact after all these years; but now it was small and bare, with only a few minnows swirling through the clear water without purpose.
“I think we got bigger,” he said finally.
You looked over at him, only to see the way he watched the current held the same longing you felt along your chest.
“That’s stupid.” Your voice came out softer than you meant it to.
Noah shrugged. “It’s unfortunately the answer.”
As you glanced back at the river and the log and that stupid little stone pool that stubbornly survived- your shoulders fell.
“Why did we have to grow up?” you asked, and Noah barely heard you over the sound of the water.
“I don’t know,” he said, making you turn, tracing his eyes with your own. “Sometimes I hate that we did.”
You watched his mouth open and close, clamping over words he did not seem ready to give. His stare moved over your face, catching the way your brows twitched in question at his hesitation, before he dropped his gaze to the ground.
Noah’s jaw worked once more to chew back the question. Though he let it slip anyway.
“Did you ever want to stay?”
He looked up slowly, and you wished he hadn’t. You wished he had kept his eyes on the dirt so you could pretend the sound of the water had swept away the question before you could have heard it.
The way you sucked in a breath gave him the answer. “Noah,” you whispered, almost apologetic.
His lips twitched, but there was no humour behind it. “Sounds like yes.”
It was easier then to look back at the river than it was to look at him. “I did,” you admitted. “For a long time, I really did.”
Noah’s voice softened. “Then why didn’t you?”
You swallowed down the words you couldn’t say. Because staying would have meant wanting things you were too scared to name, and leaving had felt easier than standing next door to him every summer and pretending your heart did not trip every single time he smiled at you. You had been seventeen, and then eighteen, and then gone; which wasn’t that what you were supposed to do? Grow up and then… leave?
You only shrugged, eyes fixed on the current. “I had to start my life.”
Then it was Noah's turn to look away before you could see the way his eyes sank in vulnerability, his hands now resting inside his pockets because at least then he could cover up and hide even just a small part of himself.
“You had one here,” he stated. “With the boys and your family.”
He shrugged his shoulders, though there was nothing careless about it or the way he now looked down at the ground as he toed away at a loose rock in the dirt.
“With…me.”
It was unfair the way your heart ached from his words. You faced him, yet he remained poised towards the river, licking his lips and lifting his head to stare out across the bend, as if you weren’t there.
Sucking in a nervous breath, you laughed faintly. “I think that was the problem.”
Noah’s brow pulled together slightly, and you hated the way he understood just enough to be hurt by it.
“I mean,” you continued quickly, “aren’t we supposed to do that? Leave and go figure out who we are away from everything we used to be?”
Away from you, you did not say.
Noah finally turned, not just his head but his whole body, facing you with what now seemed like confrontation.
“Did it work?” he asked. “Do you feel any different than you did then?”
And although he did not say what he truly meant, because he did not ask if leaving had made you forget the shape of summers with him- or if another city or another man had been enough to make your heart stop reaching backward, you knew.
So Noah continued to stare, waiting to see if you would lie.
“No.” You whispered, breathing another moment before letting the words go. “I’ve only gotten older.”
Noah's face twitched. It was small, barely more than the pull of his brow, and his mouth parted around a breath he was not ready to take.
For once, he did not look like he knew what to do with you.
“Trees,” he said softly.
You opened your mouth, but whatever you might have said was swallowed by the bushes rustling behind you.
The blob of a man crashed through the brush from the left with a plastic bag hooked around his wrist, and you screamed high-pitched with fear as you jumped back, letting go of your bike.
The swede screamed at the sound, bag swinging around as the cans clattered together, and Noah stumbled backward, hand clutching his chest. “Jesus Christ, what is wrong with you?”
“What is wrong with me?” Jolly yelled, eyes wide as he gasped. “She screamed first.”
“You came out of the trees!” You snapped breathlessly, sighing in relief that it was just Jolly.
Folio appeared behind him, pushing his bike through the bushes with a cider in his hand. Ruffilo laughed, snorting heavily as he ducked beneath a branch.
“I told him not to jump out.” Ruffilo tried to hide his smile as he looked between you and Noah. “But now I’m kinda glad he did.”
“To be fair, I didn’t jump,” Jolly argued, huffing out a breath, “I merely emerged.”
The weight of Noah’s stare lingered at the side of your face as you kneeled to pick up your bike, gripping the handlebars. Both of you pretended that your racing hearts were only because Jolly had decided to crawl out of the woods, that when you finally risked a glance, Noah looked away too quickly, dragging a hand through his hair.
Folio took a slow sip from his drink, eyes moving between the two of you with interest. “So,” he said, swallowing. “Are we interrupting something, or...?”
“No,” you said too quickly.
Noah answered at the same time. “Shut up.”
Jolly’s eyes widened with delight as Ruffilo stepped around a patch of mud near the bank.
“Okay, well, before this becomes whatever that was, change of plans,” Folio said, crushing his can and tossing it into your bike basket.
You looked at him. “We just got here.”
“Exactly,” Jolly said, “And the vibes are off.”
“The vibes?” Noah repeated, still a little breathless.
Jolly gestured broadly toward the river. “Look at this place. It’s depressing now.”
“It is not depressing,” you said, though your voice gave you away.
“But it is, though. We got here early,” Folio explained, shifting his bike against his hip, “and Jolly started talking about how the log looks tiny now, which made Ruffilo say it’s probably because we’re adults, which made Jolly spiral about taxes and dental coverage and how he pulled something in his back last week just because he sneezed funny.”
“I almost died, and that's a fact,” Jolly said solemnly.
Noah’s mouth twitched despite himself, some of the tension loosening from his shoulders. “So what, the river hurt your feelings?”
“Yes,” Jolly said, pointing at him. “Thank you for understanding.”
“So where are we going instead?” you asked.
Jolly’s grin returned, which should have worried you. Folio looked far too pleased as he swung one leg back over his bike. Ruffilo however sighed because a part of him had already regretted leaving his house.
Noah noticed, and his head tilted, eyes narrowing. “No.”
“Yes,” Jolly countered.
“No, what?” you asked, eyes darting between them.
Jolly only smiled wider at that, pushing his bike back toward the trail. “You’ll know it when you see it.”
By the time the trees thinned again, before the house had fully appeared through the leaves, you already knew.
“No,” you mirrored, the word weak.
The clearing opened gradually, the trees loosening around the trail until long grass brushed everyone’s legs, and the Miller house came into full view at the far edge of the clearing.
The white siding had gone grey with age, and even the thistles were tall enough to scrape your calves, sprouting through the dirt around the porch which now sagged in the middle. One of the front windows had been boarded from the inside, the wood warped with water stains, while sheets of plastic hung behind the others, shifting in the breeze.
It looked just as abandoned as you remembered, even with the signs of renovation showing through. Nonetheless, the sight of it made your heart kick heavily.
Folio spread his arms. “Yes.”
“Be for fucking real,” you groaned, not even trying to hide the whine that slipped into your voice. “You think this abomination is better than the river?”
Jolly turned toward the house. “What? No better time to find the woman in the window than at the ripe age of twenty-five!”
Noah glanced at you, and you looked away too quickly, pretending the upstairs window had stolen your attention first.
It was easier to fear the ghosts, you thought.
He made a quiet sound beside you, not quite a laugh, and you frowned. “You’re thinking about it, aren't you?”
Noah’s smile deepened as his hand found the small of your back, warm through the thin fabric of your shirt as he nudged you closer to the house. “What, you mean the getaway ride?” His eyes flicked to the upstairs window, then back to you.
Your face warmed before you could stop it. “Noah, I swear I saw her.”
He did not laugh right away. His smile softened, caught on the memory of when you were twelve, hands twisted into the back of his shirt, knees bumping against his bike frame as you screamed at him to go faster. You had been so worried that something was chasing you, and he had been laughing so hard he nearly tipped you both into the curb.
He then looked down at himself, a proud hum vibrating from his chest. “Well,” he said, easing his hand from the small of your back, “I can protect you now that I’m big and strong.”
You blinked at him. “Great,” you muttered. “I’m sure the ghost is terrified.”
Noah’s tease was gentle beside you. “She should be.”
Folio yelled from ahead, “She’s been dead for a hundred years bro.”
“Then she’s had plenty of time to hear about me and my katana.” Noah cupped his hand over his mouth and called toward the upstairs window, “I’m not afraid of you!”
The plastic behind one of the upstairs windows ruffled against the wood in a papery shift where the breeze caught and dragged it lightly against the frame. Your eyes snapped toward it, and you stepped toward Noah so quickly your bike tipped sideways from between your hands.
You were close enough now that your shoulder brushed his, and he stilled beside you for only a second before turning to look down at your grip on his arm. A smug smile curled from the corner of his lips, though beneath it, you felt the way his arm tensed. His breath had caught quietly, and when your fingers shifted against his skin, his pulse jumped beneath your thumb.
Noah’s gaze moved from your hand to your face, his face still teasing except for the part of his eyes that had gone too warm. Jolly and Folio were snickering ahead, but you ignored it, too embarrassed by where your hand was and how fast Noah’s heart seemed to be answering.
Ruffilo, who had been quiet for too long, exhaled through his teeth. “Can we not yell when we are literally about to trespass?”
Leaving your bike behind in the trees, you followed the boys toward the porch. The house looked worse the closer you came to it, stripped down to wood and chunks of siding.
“So, no one lives here anymore?”
Folio shook his head as Jolly reached the front door and wrapped a hand around the withered handle. “Nope. Someone bought it and started renovating. It’s entirely gutted right now.”
The door rattled in its frame as Jolly pushed against it once, the old wood complaining without opening. He huffed out a sigh and stepped carefully across the splitting porch, pausing whenever one creaked too loudly beneath him.
“They thought it would be fun to sneak in and take a peek,” Ruffilo said, his mouth flattening as he watched Jolly move toward the front window.
“Thought? Like, past tense?” Folio echoed, already following.
“Yeah, because I still think,” Jolly corrected.
Lingering at the bottom of the porch steps, your eyes moved over the mismatched boards and the plastic taped behind the windows. The gap beneath the front door was dark, dust and old leaves collecting between the grooves.
Noah stepped up beside you, his arm brushing yours. “You good?” he asked quietly, and you nodded.
You looked toward the window just as Jolly slid it upward, the wood scraping against the wood, making Ruffilo wince. Jolly froze halfway through, eyes wide, one hand still shoved beneath the frame until the window gave way all at once, jerking open with a sharp crack.
The Swede immediately grinned, turning back toward the rest of you with triumph before ducking his head inside. He climbed in, his long limbs lanky and awkward as he caught himself on the other side. Folio followed with less grace, laughing under his breath when his shoe knocked against the frame, and Ruffilo stood on the porch for one long second before finally sighing and climbing in after them.
Placing your hands on the chipped sill, sawdust pressed into your palms when you leaned forward. Inside, Jolly had already moved deeper into the front room, his voice echoing strangely through the gutted space, and Noah placed himself behind you.
“Here,” he said softly. His hands found your waist, warm through the thin fabric of your shirt. You sucked in a breath, hoping he didn’t hear the sound as he helped hoist you through, lifting your body as you pulled.
Your knee caught on the sill and Noah’s grip tightened.
“Careful, Trees,” he murmured, voice slipping beneath your skin.
“I’m trying,” you whispered, and it came out less annoyed than you wanted. With an awkward push, you made it over the frame and stumbled into the house, landing on the dusty floor with both hands out to steady yourself. Noah followed right after, ducking through the window, fingers braced on the sill before his sneakers hit the floor behind you.
The smell of sawdust and earth gathered thickly inside the house, mixed with old wood and the dry, chalky scent of drywall. It clung to the back of your throat as you straightened, brushing your palms against your shorts and leaving pale streaks behind.
Everything inside had been stripped down to the bones of the place, the walls open with exposed studs. The floor was scattered with old leaves, littered with pieces of torn plaster. Sheets of plastic hung in various places from the ceiling, dripping down through every doorway and hallway, turning the last of the evening light hazy and orange as the outside light bled through.
Noah brushed dust from his hands, and as you watched, you could still feel the phantom pressure of his fingers still resting at your waist, even though he had already let go.
You shifted forward before the feeling could show on your face, reaching into the plastic bag to grab your own can as Jolly, Ruffilo and Folio opened another.
Jolly wandered farther into the living room, phone light raised, even though there was still enough light to see. The beam swept over a peeled strip of wallpaper, a ladder leaning against the far wall.
“This is significantly better than the river.” He said, voice echoing through the hollow room,
Folio tipped his can toward the ceiling, squinting up at the exposed beams. “Yeah. Kind of cozy.”
“Nothing about this is cozy,” Ruffilo muttered, and even though you would’ve hummed in agreement, you barely heard them.
Your eyes had already found the staircase, a shiver running down your spine. Half the banister had been removed, and the remaining steps climbed into a darker pocket of the house where the orange light did not quite reach. Somewhere above, plastic shifted as another breeze cast through any cracks; the sound, though small, was enough to make that old childhood fear crawl up your throat.
Noah, to your dismay, had been watching you the entire time.
“Still scared of the upstairs?” he asked quietly.
You shot him a look. “No. I’ve grown up…”
His eyes remained careful, fixed on your own. “Yeah. You told me.” Then, his mouth turned with knowing. “Doesn’t mean much changed.”
Staring at him with the awareness of the way he looked at you, daring you to follow, made you swallow thickly. His smile stayed small, but there was less teasing in it now.
“Prove it, Y/N.”
The sound of your name in his mouth made the room feel even more barren than it physically could be. Only the boy next door could take something as stupid as a dare and make it about something else entirely.
“Fine,” you said, because backing down would have been worse, and Noah’s nod made it harder to breathe.
Folio went first, one hand sliding along the wall where the banister had been removed. The stairs groaned beneath his weight, each sound loud through the hollow house. Ruffilo followed after him, quieter now, as Jolly took the rear.
You stepped onto the first stair, which caused the wood to dip beneath your foot, Noah close behind you. His breath was quiet at your back, his steps matching yours as the orange light from the living room below grew into a dusk grey above. It was warmer on the upper landing, dust coating the air with the smell of stale drywall.
The old fear curled around your stomach, but so did something else when Noah then threaded his fingers through yours.
You looked down before you could stop yourself, watching his hand find yours in the dim light. The boys had lowered their voices to whispers, as if the darkness only welcomed softer things.
“Noah,” you whispered, and he only looked ahead, his thumb brushing once against your knuckle.
“Proving it,” he murmured.
It was hard not to think about the way his fingers fit between yours perfectly, as if they were furious they had waited so long, or the way he held you without teasing and tugging just to see what affect he had on you.
At the top of the stairs, the hallway opened into a larger bonus room stripped bare like the rest of the house. Folio lifted his phone, sweeping the flashlight across the room.
The beam caught on a rolled-up rug, tucked against another ladder placed just below the attic. A tin bucket of tools sat against a withered door, propping it open, as more plastic drapes coated the walls.
“Okay,” he whispered, quieter now. “Well this is actually creepy.”
Every pair of shoes crunched against the torn floor, the sound of a nail skittering and rolling across the wood ringing through the quiet hall when Ruffilo kicked it by accident.
Jolly raised his own phone light, grin returning even though his voice had dropped. “Helloooo, window woman.”
Ruffilo stood near the top of the stairs, arms tight around himself. “This is such a bad idea. If someone is outside, the sun is setting so fast they’ll be able to see us through the windows.”
As if the spirits had heard him, a pale sweep of headlights cut through the plastic of the front bedroom.
Everyone froze, your hand squeezing Noah's before you could think. The light moved slowly over the room, casting shadows along the walls, making the exposed studs throw long, thin lines across the floor.
Folio lowered his phone first as Jolly glanced at the group, and Ruffilo whispered a rushed, “Turn them off.”
Every flashlight went dark as Jolly cursed under his breath.
“Why would you manifest that shit, man?”
The sound of tires crunching over gravel grew louder as the car approached the house. No one moved as the room held you all in place, the hum of the engine echoing through the walls. Another beam of light dragged over the plastic, brighter this time, and the floorboards beneath your feet glowed faintly before falling back into shadow.
“Move,” Ruffilo hissed.
Panic broke through the room all at once. Jolly grabbed Folio by the sleeve and stumbled toward the hanging sheets of plastic, both of them slipping and crashing into the ladder. It fell to the floor with a metallic clatter, loud enough to make Noah swear under his breath.
Ruffilo ducked toward the back bedroom as Folio and Jolly followed. You were about to join them before Noah’s hand tightened around yours.
“This way,” he breathed, pulling you with him.
You stumbled after him through the dark, your shoulder brushing exposed insulation. Your free hand caught briefly against a nail as he guided you toward the withered door at the side of the room. The tin bucket that had been propping it open scraped against the floor when Noah kicked it aside, and the sound made both of you freeze.
Outside, the engine idled, and Noah pulled the door open just enough for you to slip through.
The room beyond was smaller than you expected, narrow, yet tall, with stacks of baseboards piled on the torn carpet. Noah stepped in after you and eased the door mostly shut behind him, leaving only a thin strip of grey light cutting across the floor.
Neither of you breathed until the car door slammed outside.
“Shit,” you looked around, pulling your hand from Noah’s to peek outside the window.
It faced the backyard, the plastic taped over the glass turning everything outside blurry, even with the night sky that shone through. Peering underneath one warped corner where the tape had peeled loose, you caught a glimpse of Folio’s face appearing in another upstairs window.
A man’s voice carried from outside, sharp enough to cut through the walls, and Folio’s head disappeared.
“Hey!”
Your stomach dropped, and Noah immediately pulled you from the plastic, pressing your back against his chest and into the closet. Leaning against the wall, he looked over your shoulder toward the yard as a flashlight beamed up from the ground towards the house.
“Stay down,” he breathed as you sank against him, feeling the press of his heart as footsteps crunched below.
Somewhere in the house, something clattered. There was a curse, followed by Jolly’s voice that sounded falsely deep and more polite than he had ever really been.
“Good evening, sir.”
You pressed a hand over your mouth. Noah’s fingers found your waist on instinct, steadying you as both of you froze in the room.
“What the hell are you doing in there?” the man called.
Another clatter followed, and then there was a scream, which was certainly Jolly.
“Get out of there, you little shits!”
“We’re just… looking around?” Folio offered, and you heard the door below open and close, rattling the floor beneath your feet.
Ruffilo’s voice cut in, strained but controlled. “Hey, yeah, we’re leaving. I’m sorry. We know this was stupid.”
“You think?” the man snapped. “This is private property.”
Jolly cleared his throat, yelling at the man who stopped at the bottom of the stairs. “In our defence, the mosquitoes are pretty bad outside. And you should probably put up more signs.”
“Jolly,” Ruffilo hissed, earning a snicker from Folio. The three of them shuffled down the hall, stopping just outside the door you were hidden behind.
Noah’s breath moved unevenly against your hair, almost a laugh, but he swallowed it down before it became a sound.
The man said something you couldn’t make out, lower this time. Ruffilo answered, his voice steadier.
“It’s just us. We promise it won’t happen again.”
Noah’s fingers dug gently into your waist as you tensed against him, realizing they were right outside the door. Ruffilo, Folio, Jolly, and whoever the man was, all close enough that one breath could give you away.
You could hear Jolly breathing too loudly in the hallway as the man’s flashlight cut beneath the crack of the door, a thin white line dragging over the floorboards and stopping just short of Noah’s sneakers.
Noah’s forearm tightened around your middle, making you feel every place his body met yours. Your hands rested on his, and the longer you were pressed against him, the harder your pulse skipped.
“Downstairs,” the man ordered, and there was a shuffle of movement.
Folio’s voice drifted past the door, fading away as they descended. “For the record, I agree that the signage was unclear.”
“Shut up,” Ruffilo whispered.
Both you and Noah stayed in place until the front door slammed shut, locking in place. Their muffled voices carried from outside.
Noah’s fingers loosened but didn’t pull away, giving you enough room to move if you wanted to, but you didn't.
Outside, Jolly said something that made the man bark back at him, but the words blurred beneath the rush of blood in your ears. You shifted carefully to turn and make space where there was none, but the closet was too narrow. Your hip pressed back against him, your body fitting too close to his, and Noah made a low sound in his throat before he could suppress it.
“You okay?” You said quietly, already trying to step away.
His hand tightened once more to keep you there a second longer, which was when you felt the heat of him, the tension below his waist proof he wasn’t as unaffected as he had pretended to be.
Your breath caught, and he knew you realized, every part of him careful.
“Sorry,” he whispered.
As the voices below retreated and the car engine grew louder, you should have stepped forward. Instead, your fingers settled over his knuckles, and you let your body press further against him.
“Trees,” the nickname almost sounded like a plea- your head turning enough to feel his lips brush your temple.
And although you no longer needed to stay in the space of the closet, you did, turning carefully so your shoulder brushed the wall until your chest was against his. You stopped when facing him in the dark, nowhere left to look except at the curve of his lips.
It was hard to see the expression on his face while hidden in the shadow, but as his hand rose to your jaw, thumb brushing the dip of your chin, you had a pretty good feeling about where his own eyes lay.
“Tell me no.” Noah’s breath fanned your face, and you shook your head.
His thumb stilled beneath your chin.
The sound of your name left your chest tight, and for a second, you heard the river again, his voice asking if you had ever wanted to stay.
“I won’t leave this time.” You said.
You rose onto the tips of your toes, and his hand cupped your cheek as he bent toward you, fingers vibrating beneath your jaw, and the recognition of his nerves made a breathy laugh escape your lips.
Noah, who had always grinned smugly in your driveway while trying to make you nervous. Noah, who had stolen your phone and teased you until your face burned. Noah, who always seemed so very sure of himself… here, in the dark, he was shaking- careful until the very second your mouth found his.
At the press of your lips, he did not dare move, as though afraid one wrong breath might make you pull away in regret. But when you pushed harder against his mouth and when your fingers curled into his shirt, kissing him like you had been waiting just as long, his composure fell.
His breath broke hungry against your mouth.
As his hand slid from your cheek into your hair, he tugged at the strands, his mouth deepening the kiss in an ache you felt in your knees. All you could hear was the pounding of your heart as his lips were no longer careful.
Noah exhaled because he had been holding his breath for years, fingers gripping your waist and tightening as he pulled you as close as physically possible.
Your back hit the wall with a soft thud as you spun, and he followed with a hand bracing beside your head to keep from crushing you into it. The movement made the baseboards shift near your feet, and you both froze for half a second, mouths still touching as a breath caught between you.
Outside, the man’s voice carried faintly through the walls over the sound of his car, and you pulled away slightly, just for Noah to brush your lips.
The brunette let out the quietest laugh against your mouth, the sound sending warmth down your arms and across your stomach.
“Shh,” you scolded, though you were the one who had kissed him again.
His mouth curved beneath yours for a moment until the smile disappeared into it. You felt him everywhere, the press of his chest and the warmth of his palm at the base of your neck with the tremble still hiding in his hand every time he touched you.
You had imagined kissing Noah before, dozens of times.
At seventeen, you dreamed of the heat in your backyard with that fire pit smoke clinging to his shirt and his knee brushing yours beneath the table. At eighteen, when he crossed his bedroom window shirtless, albeit on purpose, it was a sight that left you wanting him out loud. Even now, older and supposedly different, you had imagined it in brief, shameful flashes every time your eyes met his.
Yet, you had never imagined him shaking.
Your hands slid up his chest, fingers catching in his shirt as you pulled him down, earning another sound he tried to swallow. Noah held his forehead against yours as he briefly pulled his mouth away.
“Fuck’s sake.” He almost sounded hurt, a tone of disbelief ringing through the words.
Your fingers tightened, meeting his gaze. Your eyes adjusted to the dark, barely able to make out the frustrated lines of his face.
“What?”
Noah shook his head once as his hands slid around your back, one resting low on the curve of your spine while the other held your shoulder blades.
“I thought it would feel different,” he whispered, pulling you toward him as he stepped out of the closet.
Your breath caught. “The kiss?”
“You.” He swallowed, his thumb brushing once at the base of your spine. “I thought that maybe if it ever happened, moving on would feel easier.”
You barely breathed. “And?”
His mouth hovered near yours, not touching.
“It doesn’t.”
The words sat with you, close enough to feel against your lips. All you could do for a long moment was stare at him and the shadows of his face in the dark room. He still held you close, and your fingers loosened before curling into his shirt again, lost in thought.
“No, it really doesn’t.” You agreed.
You reached for him first, fingers sliding into his hair. And when you kissed him again, it was slower, heavier, relishing the taste of his mouth that moved in an agonizing longing you had never once known before. Noah’s tongue pressed slowly along your bottom lip, the sensation making the room tilt beneath your feet.
His lips tried to learn what years had stolen from him, for possibly he could make up for every lost summer both of you had spent pretending not to want this.
Your back met a wall once more before you realized you had even moved, the unfinished drywall leaving a dust of white on the back of your shirt. Noah followed the motion but stopped himself before his weight could press too fully into yours, and even then, he was careful.
The fingers you threaded through his hair ran down the back of his neck, pulling him, and the small distance he had left between you disappeared. The line of him pressed against your thigh, and he let an unsteady breath slip between your mouth as the house creaked somewhere behind the door.
Noah’s mouth dragged from yours only far enough to breathe. “We should stop,” he said quietly, but his thumb brushed the skin beneath your shirt, tracing the waistband of your shorts.
“Do you want to?” You whispered, catching the shift of his jaw as he scoffed a laugh.
For a second time tonight, you thought he may lie. And you almost wanted him to, if only because one of you should have been sensible enough to remember the dust in your lungs, and that your friends were probably waiting somewhere in the treeline for you to escape.
When his ocher eyes lifted to yours, the moonlight casting through the plastic-covered window told you everything you needed to know.
“No,” he said lowly, “Not even a little.”
“Okay,” you replied, his breath catching as your hands lowered to his shorts. Mirroring his fingers, you skimmed his waistband, dipping the tips of your fingers between him and the elastic.
He kissed you harder this time, his hand fully sliding beneath the edge of your shirt. His palm was warm against your waist as he slid it up your back, your stomach pulling tight as he roamed his hands over your skin fervently.
You arched into him without meaning to, and his mouth left yours with a moan, dragging along the corner of your jaw instead. The kiss he left there was open, aching, and hungry as you let your fingers slide a little farther beneath his waistband.
Noah’s hands tightened at your back as he breathed your name in warning, but you only smiled. For all the teasing and cocky grins he could always muster, nothing smug lingered on his face now.
“Let’s go home.” He murmured, dragging his teeth gently down the curve of your neck before pressing a string of kisses back up, stopping only once he reached your mouth. “I need you, but not here.”
You nodded, mouth against his once more before he pulled away, lips brushing your ear. “In my bed,” his words rushing ever lower in your stomach. “Where I can take my time with you.”
part three coming soon
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