Ways an "Autistic Special Interest" hits differently to just "Enjoying a Topic"
And I'll start off by saying that I know some people don't like the term "special interest", but I take no issue with it personally and find it easier to use online especially to explain things.
Secondly, this is how I experience it. This is not an overarching experience.
But a lot of people seem to think a Special Interest must be this 100% wonderful thing all the time. And it is wonderful. But also:
The intensity of enjoyment can be overwhelming. Every day interests are enjoyable in the moment, but a special interest is almost too enjoyable. I can't explain how that is both a good thing and a bad thing all at once.
It consumes thoughts. This isn't every special interest nor all the time. But sometimes it makes thinking about other more important topics next to impossible.
It makes other topics hard to discuss. Trying to let a friend or my husband talk about something else becomes a struggle as my brain can't let go of the special interest long enough to process new information.
It can make falling asleep difficult.
It can cause concentration issues whilst driving, at work, etc.
It can be the only thing that raises your emotions, which is fantastic but bad when a person who loves you is also trying to cheer you up and they feel second rate to your special interest constantly.
If you lose the special interest, it can cause literal grief, depressive episodes etc
I love my special interests. But they can be a blessing and a curse all at once.
