Do you ever think about how both Lolita and Interview with the Vampire the book involve protagonists losing the pseudo-daughter girl they long to wholly possess because they underestimated the power of community theatre
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Do you ever think about how both Lolita and Interview with the Vampire the book involve protagonists losing the pseudo-daughter girl they long to wholly possess because they underestimated the power of community theatre

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i think maybe "sapphic yearning" is a kind of false consciousness that justifies one's own continued immiseration
i was once a yearner but at a certain point you have to grow up and let your private, overwrought fantasies confront real love in the real world and put yourself at the mercy of honest dealing with people
i’ll be honest learning about behaviour modification and canine psychology has really helped me process my own feelings and emotional responses
i find so much therapy talk aimed at humans has too much flowery abstract prose about mindfulness or whatever but for myself I really prefer an approach focused on hard science and what biochemical processes are responsible for me feeling this way, especially anxiety. Also why i prefer listening to lectures given by psychologists or counselors made for other fellow psychs and counselors.
But yeah I feel like there’s lessons anxious humans can take home from anxious dogs
reactiveness is usually the product of fear and unconfidence
when something becomes too overwhelming slow down, add more distance
every time you practice an avoidant behaviour it gets more ingrained and will take more effort to beak the habit once it has been well established.
try refocusing on something else when you feel yourself starting to get worked up over something
progress is slow and if you think you can fix things overnight you are setting yourself up for disappointment
don’t only correct mistakes, actively give praise as well
Physical exercise
I really don’t want to open this can of worms because Tumblr hath no fury like people called out on their political performativeness but it is literally driving me up the wall to watch people react to Serkis’ ‘keep Tolkien white’ commentary by insisting twice as hard that Tolkien would descend down to earth and dropkick the entire Republican party to hell or whatever, just because they want to ensure that a piece of media they enjoy isn’t seen as being morally impure. Case in point: I have seen at least five instances of Tolkien’s ‘I hate apartheid’ valedictorian address being used as a ‘counter’ to Serkis being racist, including by actual news outlets.
Except it’s only ever the ‘I hate apartheid’ line that’s shared, and not the actual quote in its full context. Because here it is:
If we consider what Merton College and what the Oxford School of English owes to the Antipodes, to the Southern Hemisphere, especially to scholars born in Australia and New Zealand, it may well be felt that it is only just that one of them should now ascend an Oxford chair of English. Indeed it may be thought that justice has been delayed since 1925. There are of course other lands under the Southern Cross. I was born in one; though I do not claim to be the most learned of those who have come hither from the far end of the Dark Continent. But I have the hatred of apartheid in my bones; and most of all I detest the segregation or separation of Language and Literature. I do not care which of them you think White.
Which is to say. This isn’t exactly the antiracist quote of the century, to say the least. This is a white South Africa born man and a white Australian shaking hands and going ‘omg we relate’ and expressing what is a very, very mild ‘segregation is not great’ opinion in order to convey his thoughts on an academic subject, ie the confluence of language and literature. Using race to make a point about his own subject of interest, in his own interest, which is, amusingly enough, what a lot of ostensibly well meaning progressive seem to be doing.
I also think that some of the general surprise around ‘what do you mean large swathes of the Tolkien fandom are incredibly conservative!?’ in lib/left Tolkien fandom is the result of a tendency in said parts of the fandom to transpose one’s own progressiveness onto Tolkien and turn a blind eye to things like, say, the Shire being a very specifically mid-century British racist construct that is very, very clear in its politics, often going so far as to insist it’s anarchist or an ideal society or whatever the fuck… and then getting really Pikachu-meme ‘but they’re misreading it’ every single time a conservative explains exactly what it is about the legendarium that they really love, and get surprised when someone uses the Shire being a racist construct to do more racism. It is 2026 let us do away with ‘I don’t see colour’ interpretations of media, I beg. Nobody is cancelling you for enjoying a book that is not kind to race. Most of the books I love are not kind to race.
also re: ‘serkis is factually incorrect bc there canonically were hobbits with brown skin so tolkien is antiracist’. hobbits with brown skin, in the period tolkien was writing in, did not deliberately signify racialisation. half the famous five kids were referred to as being nut brown. the stars of malory towers were described as brown skinned and were all fully white english. in enid blyton. ie a notoriously racist writer. the kid in the secret garden is described as brown. midcentury writers used brown as a standin for tanned! this is incredibly common! how are we doing ‘oh he’s just of his time’ but not bothering to look at the ‘conventions’ of his time! it’s fine if you want to interpret it as that in fanworks and adaptations but i’m going insane when people are acting like tolkien referring to characters as brown skinned makes them not-white and apparently makes him some sort of antiracist.
He did, too!

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I do think the right way to think about the Mirror of Galadriel is that it‘s the equivalent of an entirely home-built computer tower, with chips that are only barely legal for civilians to buy and wires that look like a rat’s nest but are actually hyperoptimized for efficiency, and a homemade OS in a coding language she invented, and cybersecurity that would make the CIA cry, and also some judiciously applied superglue and/or gorilla tape, made in their home office by someone who helped invent the internet at DARPA in the 60s.
And that a Palantir is, comparatively, a MacBook Air.
Cybertrucks look like somebody tried to build their own Delorean out of sheet metal and cardboard.
Impressive for a convention, less so for an ostensibly roadworthy vehicle.
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If you see me like your vent post that is me giving u a lil hug, I do not enjoy your suffering
Much Ado About Nothing - Text Posts (i)

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“Call Me Maybe” with every other beat removed
YOU’RE STUBBORN, JEANS STOLEN, NIGHT ROWING
THINK YOU’RE BABY?
HEY AND YOU, AMAZING, BUT YOMBER, SO CLAYBE
my gf crafted this with lots of care for yall. pls enjoy:
losing my mind over this
You effectively cannot cancel someone like JKR no matter how bad they get, but you CAN cancel small-time indie creators, and a lot of people seem to view this as some kind of partial compensation for the powerlessness in the actually important cases.
the restorative practice called going to the movies alone, very important to me like taking vitamins
Keith's Tower in Aberdeenshire, Scotland. Built c. 1824
Strange racists and homophobes on the internet seem to have access to an alternate way cooler version of TV than me. "every white character on TV is in an interracial relationship" "every show has a gay couple in it" "main characters keep having to secretly be bisexual and nonbinary" "every show has gratuitous full frontal nudity" like damn promise?? What channel???
as a black gay person real like where y'all be finding this stuff pass the name

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Having been Very Online in the mid 1990s is rough because half of your formative influences are like "yeah, this Flash video engages in pop culture deconstruction that's strikingly topical even thirty years later and did things to my vocabulary that persist to this day, and I can literally never recommend it to anyone because its core premise is a level of homophobic ordinarily observed only under laboratory conditions".
Them: Hey, you were around for the first wave of real webcomics. Which one was your favourite?
Me:
#thank god homestar runner aged well (via @shibascarf)
Homestar Runner is the way that it is in large part because it's a response to the 90s edgelord bullshit I'm talking about; while the characters had earlier appeared in print, the Flash animated version that everybody remembers didn't debut until January of 2000. If it's aged well, that isn't an accident – it's a product of its authors looking at the state of 1990s Internet culture and making a conscious decision to be Not That.
for the last time: if there's a sexy naked lady with long flowing hair and MAYBE a diaphanous sheet or flower crown; lots of swirlies and ribbon like curving LUSCIOUS shapes; very lush foliage (acanthus leaves, elegant flowers) and all kinds of fauna — both especially waterside (lily pads, lotuses, reeds, cranes, dragonflies); lots of green; everything is a lot of iron, stone, stained glass, mosaic, and carved wood; the windows or their frames are very Shaped; the lights are soft yellow; or it's a font with lots of line weight variation; feather tips are rounded; everything reminds you of france, vienna, or japan and something vaguely mediterranean; OR it's literally a Parisian metro station
— then it's art nouveau
and if the sexy lady has a bob cut or a hair cap and is wearing a column or flapper dress; there's a lot of geometry like rectangles, arches, rays, and diamonds; angels have super sharp wings and a lot of muscles; everything is steel, concrete, marble, gold, and red velvet seats; everything is VERY angular; and all the foliage is basically papyrus fronds; things feel vaguely Egyptian or Turkish or Mesopotamian; the fonts play with being very skinny or very thick and are sans serif with extra lines; or Gatsby would be found floating dead in that pool
— then it's art deco
And if looks kinda like art nouveau
— with lots of lush flora, tiny insects (like dragonflies) or graceful birds, stained glass, iron, warm golden lighting, lots of wood and wood carving (but now it's more wood paneling), a stylistic fondness for Japan, line weight variation in the font, and tile (but this time it's carved or sculpted on, not tiny mosaic)
but you're worried it's art deco
— because the forms (especially foliage) are very symmetrical and slightly more angular or blocky and graphic looking, things are more rectangular than circular or curvy in architecture, the patterns repeat more often, and more of the lamps are pyramids or rectangular, and there are nods to Egyptian or Ottoman style, and they used the color red (probably in an accent chair or carpet rug)
BUT there's no steel, concrete, gold plating or gilding, marble, big muscles, spiky or radiating diamond shapes, angular people, or flappers,
AND the vibes are jacobean, gothic, or spanish mission revival; they love some brick and stone; the wallpaper is an explosion of colorful pattern that could give you arsenic poisoning or help depict a descent into postpartum psychosis in a famous short story; but there are NO people to be seen, not even sexy ladies,
— then THAT is the arts & crafts movement.