full time bingus enthusiast

the TSA's dick detector is the epitome of security theater. how many times have you ACTUALLY caught a woman trying to smuggle a small bomb in her panties

i mean average sized bomb

everytime i drink, my clit gets rock hard

and every time we kiss, i swear i can fly

literally if gollum had still been a kind of normal looking guy who had all his teeth and walked on two legs sometimes but was just as mentally unstable there would be endless gollum yaoi we would be swimming in a sea of bilbum and frollum and even samlum he could even be bald and do the funny voice and talk to himself there would still be horny reimaginings of aragorn hunting him down and gandalf interogating him its only because he's ugly that no one wants him to fuck normal looking guys

how are yall gonna share this all and not mention that the muppet with the fraggle rack is named Arieola Borealis

every single addition to this post caused additional psychic damage i hit 0hp at ‘fraggle rack’

The fish is named Slippery Richardson

Finally, something that adapts DND correctly 

contrary to popular belief i think calvin's adhd is, funnily enough, medicated. he takes extended release ritalin every morning alongside his chocolate frosted sugar bombs. this is because he appreciates being more easily able to focus on his various Schemes, Projects, and Machinations while more effectively ignoring schoolwork

calvin's dad pulling up to the house and seeing the whole driveway covered in a (completed) snowman recreation of the entire terracotta army and he takes a deep breath and greets calvin's mom with "i see calvin remembered his methylphenidate today"

so hungry i could eat a mutual......