Dolly’s Diary @disorderedolly - Tumblr Blog

finally stopped cvtting myself and developed the worst anger issues man has seen

#like genuinely i am getting violent #i had to fight the urge to punch the front seat of a car because i was frustrated when my aunt got me from work #i knocked the middle panel of a door loose because i hit it #i bang my head off the wall until im lightheaded and then i scream into a pillow and punch and kick and scream #idk man i think i prefer just cutting myself cuz i hate being angry #i need to talk to my bf about this but it is never a good time to bring it up #i don’t want to be angry with him #vent blog #tw vent #vent #tw s/h #tw cvt

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todostoast

every year i reach new lows and wish i killed myself earlier

im so tired of this shit i wish i died the first time i attempted

#vent #vent blog #tw vent #tw suicide #tw sui ideation #tw sui implied #tw sucidal ideation #suicidal ideation

bl0odshed

i’ve spent all my life trying to fill this void within me. i’ve tried drugs. i’ve tried harming myself. i’ve tried stealing. ive tried sex. i’ve tried everything over and over again but it’s all a temporary. the moment i am alone, the thoughts and feelings come rushing in, and i cannot escape them. i can’t keep using these short term coping mechanisms, i need something to keep me happy 24/7

would you stick around if i got better? or would you miss having someone to save?

#vent #vent blog #bpd #bpd feels #tw vent #bpd thoughts #bpd mood #i might kill myself soon #it’s never been worse

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if i die young i never have to grow. nothing has to change if i dont keep going

#vent #vent blog #bpd #bpd feels #tw vent #bpd thoughts #tw sui implied #tw suicide #suicidal ideation

over a year clean. and i ruined it all

#i’m such a fuckup #holy shit #vent #vent blog #bpd #bpd feels #tw vent #tw s3lf harm #bpd thoughts #tw s/h #s/h #tw relapse #relapse #s/h relapse #god i wish i could do some lines rn

me vs the urge to get absolutely shitfaced at 1pm on a monday

#addict posting

what if i just killed myself? it’s not like i have to worry what people think after that. or worry about anything at all.

#vent #vent blog #bpd #bpd feels #tw vent #bpd thoughts #bpd mood #tw s/h #s/h #tw s3lf harm #tw sucidal ideation #tw suicide

why does this have to be so hard. why can’t i just be normal and okay

#vent #vent blog #bpd #bpd feels #tw vent #bpd thoughts

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abusedpixie

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐥

hamoodmood-deactivated20250309

managingitall

I just want to not be in pain, to not feel things so strongly, to sleep normally, to like the way I look, to know who I am.

I just want to be normal

i miss being sick

there's going to be a day when you forget about this blog and are able to live at least a semi-happy life. there will be a day when you can say you're okay and mean it. i promise

thank you 🤍

#i appreciate you #this means a lot to me

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hey i dont know you and you don't know me, but i hope things get easier, if not better, for you soon. there is always tomorrow <3

be safe, you are loved and you are cared for.

thank you. it’s very much appreciated 🤍

i want to hurt myself so bad

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