Dino

is your name george? cause that bush is a w

(gordon ramsay on star trek) oh what the hell? the gagh is fucking dead! look at this! it’s not moving. it’s feasting with its fucking ancestors in sto’vo’kor! excuse me, darling, how fresh is this gagh? they’re what? fucking hell. thank you. my god, it’s fucking replicated. wow, fuck me.

(gordon opens a compartment on the wall and dozens of tribbles fall on his head) fucking hell. at least someone’s enjoying the food.

robocop’s famous catchphrase

if you’re trying to explain something to your friend who has adhd try sucking them off sloppy style!

hi waiter could I get the spaghetti I promise I’ll behave this time

water bill $10,000

worth every penny

why did i have a customer that hole punched his credit card’s chip out, because “he didn’t want a chip”, and then didn’t understand why I couldn’t process his transaction