Oh god. I'm really doing this.

That...I....thank you Gracie. I love it.

Yeah!!!! I wanna be like you one day!!! Because you're super duper cool!!!

You shouldnt want to be like someone like me, Gracie. What about Grandma?

Grandma is cool, too, but who says I can't be like you both? I heard you were a cool detective, and Grandma is a cool healer and makes really good cookies. I wanna be like both of you guys!

You....you're gonna be great, kid. Whatever you choose to be. But maybe don't choose the detective route. They might get intimidated by your sneakiness.

That...I....thank you Gracie. I love it.

Yeah!!!! I wanna be like you one day!!! Because you're super duper cool!!!

You shouldnt want to be like someone like me, Gracie. What about Grandma?

That...I....thank you Gracie. I love it.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you.

Bullshit.

Oh my god, come on…

Dont act like you wouldn't say the same thing if I was acting like this.

Well, I wouldn’t know how to act if you were acting “like this”

Oh bullshit you have not held back a single punch on calling me out on my shit.

...Of course you don't. I'm gonna get you a bottle of water and some of Marie's sweets cause god knows you'll need it with this talk.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you.

Bullshit.

Oh my god, come on…

Dont act like you wouldn't say the same thing if I was acting like this.

Well, I wouldn’t know how to act if you were acting “like this”

Oh bullshit you have not held back a single punch on calling me out on my shit.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you.

Bullshit.

Oh my god, come on…

Dont act like you wouldn't say the same thing if I was acting like this.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you.

Bullshit.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

The first part is correct.

You know who you sound like right now?

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

Nothing’s going on! Stop hounding me over something non-existent!

Okay. Nothing is going on. You're completely sober. You didn't verbally assault a friend and then show up drunk to their party. You didn't then tell anyone who came to check on you to fuck off and then threaten them if they snitch. You did NOTHING wrong, and everything is completely fine?

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

God, all of you are being so annoying…

And you're being a dick. Now sit and tell me what's going on.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.

I don’t want to.

Me neither, kiddo. Me neither. But we both know you need to. And I can get REAL annoying. So knock knock open up.

Because a little birdie is telling me you're becoming a raging asshole and I'll be fucked if anyone else in this family turns out like me.

Kid. I'm a dick. Not an idiot. How's the saying go? can't bullshit a bullshitter.

And while you were drunk, you acted shittily to the people you care about and who care about you. Which OBVIOUSLY means something is wrong. Now, as much as you hate my guts, you know I'm telling the truth when I say people care about you and want to see if you're okay.

Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s going on! I don’t know why everyone is being so presumptuous!

... You wanna try that again without lying to my face? You know i can see the conversations on this app, right?

So why even bother asking, asshole?

Because I am worried, okay? Because as much as you are constantly a sarcastic snappy pain in my ass and as much as you hate my guts, something is obviously bothering you, and I want to make sure you are okay.

I’m fine, Colm. Now fuck off.

Not happening, kiddo.