annie

when I was dying

I think it is really fucked up

to start a sentence like this

everyone complimented me

on slowly turning to ashes

'You look so pretty dear'

they said

and I heard

'try harder'

when someone is suffering

from lung cancer

You don't light them a cigarette

You don't

You do not hand a suicidal person

a loaded gun

unless you want them to die

so why did you?

why did you handed me a gun?

what was I supposed to do with it?

besides pulling the trigger

when you are sixteen

and at some point

we all are

nothing is as easy as dying

without anyone noticing

dying isn't like it is in the movies

a 60 second sequel

with blood and wounds and lots of noise

it is a quiet long-term-process

You do not recognise the dead

My newest read and the bookmark I’m using to remind myself that *I* am in control, and if I fuck up it’s my fault and my fault only.

me: i'll just eat normally and be normal :)

my ed:

*excessively works out*

*gets dizzy/lightheaded*

*is exhausted in the middle of the day*

*cries when food is offered*

everyone I know : doing great girly😊💖💕✨keep it up🤪 🤪

me:

I will lose weight

I will lose weight

I will lose weight

I will lose weight